"Oh...Izaya...please don't cry..." Shinra said nervously as he watched his friend shake and cry.

"It's not fair, it's not fucking fair that monster has people to love him and I have no one." Izaya cried, he had broken down and was now sitting on his couch, crying into his hands. Shinra sighed heavily and sat down next to the other male.

"Don't worry Izaya-kun, I'm your friend." Shinra said, trying to make the brunet feel better.

"No you're not, you're afraid of me." Izaya sobbed

"Huh? Why on earth would I be afraid of you? I know you've done some bad things but we've been friends since we were little!"

"...I know you know I have Celty's head, your just being nice to me so I won't give it to her..." Shinra was quiet for a while before reaching into his pocket and giving the raven a tissue.

"I know you've done some evil things Izaya...but you wouldn't do that to me. I know you wouldn't..."

"...well..." Izaya said nervously as he wiped his eyes with the tissue.

"I really just hate how Shizu-chan gets to have so many people to love him...my first target was Kasuka...I wanted to get rid of him because I know he was close to Shizu-chan...And I know you and Celty are close friends with Shizu-chan to...so I was planning on doing something to you two to make you not want to be friends with him..."

"What were you going to do?" Shinra asked curiously.

"I'm not sure...but I was in a dark place when I was thinking about it...so it would probably be something bad..."

"...all this trouble, just for being jealous of Shizuo." Izaya clawed his fingernails into his arms as he heard those words echo through his skull. He was Orihara Izaya; he couldn't cry like this...he just couldn't...

"I...I'm sorry Shinra..."

"Izaya, do you think that maybe you're so mad that Shizuo has people to love that… your mad he won't love you...and you've been trying to get rid of the people that love him because...if he can't love you...then he can love no one?"

"Don't...say things that are true." Izaya thought before answering the question

"That stupid...I hate that bastard..."

"Well you've been spending all this time trying to get rid of the people that love him; why do you care who loves him? How does it affect you in anyway?" Shinra asked, he knew Izaya had feelings for the blonde all hr had to do was make him admit it…and keep him from killing himself.

"It doesn't affect me…I just don't want anyone to love that monster…."

"Because you want to be the only one that loves him?" Shinra flinched when the informant punched him weakly in the arm.

"Stop putting words in my mouth, I don't love Shizu-chan he's a monster. Why would I ever love a monster like him?"

"…Well you two are more alike than you think, your both social outcasts and really everyone is either afraid of you or hates you…you two really only have each other in this lifetime."

"Wow Shinra, that makes me feel so much better…" Izaya said sarcastically as he rubbed a few stray tears from his eyes.

"Oh, sorry I didn't mean it in a mean way; all I'm saying is that you two were actually meant for each other. I bet that if you two were together then it would be the best for both of you. Shizuo would be able to mellow out his anger and I bet you would be a lot nicer if you had Shizuo to love you."

"Keep dreaming Shinra; Shizu-chan will never ever love me after what I did to Kasuka…not that I would want him to love me…"Izaya pulled his knees close to his chest and wrapped his arms around them; he really wasn't in the mood to talk anymore.

"Izaya, I'm curious about something…why do you love to hurt people so much? Why do you take a joy in it?" Shinra asked, his eyes shining with curiosity.

"…I don't know I always say how much I love my humans and yet I hurt them all the time…Physically and emotionally…I've ruined people's lives and some I even influenced them killing themselves. " Izaya was shaking now; his bangs had fallen in front of his eyes as more warm tears streamed down his cheeks.

"I-I guess I want everyone to…feel as bad as I do…" Izaya said, trying to keep his voice from shaking.

"So, you're saying that if you're not happy…then no one can be happy?" Shinra flinched when Izaya laid his head in his shoulder and started crying again.

"I…I'm a monster Shinra." Izaya cried; Shinra sighed and patted the informants head, trying to make his feel better. The two males nearly jumped out of their skin at the sound of an angry knocking at the informant's front door.

"Get out here flea and fight me like a man, if you don't I'll break the fucking door down!" Shizuo screened at the top of his lungs.

"Fuck...Why'd he show up now..." Izaya whispered nervously as tried to whip the wetness from his cheeks. He remembered the switchblade in his back pocket; Izaya reached behind him and tried to get it out as quickly as possible.

"What are you doing?" Shinra screamed as he watched the brunet flip out the blade and aim it as his body.

"I need to die! I want to die!" Izaya jumped to his feet and aimed the blade at his heart.

"Izaya don't!" Shinra said as he tried to grab the knife. Izaya screamed as the underground doctor tried to throw him on the floor and hold him down. By this time Shizuo had smashed the door to splinters and entered the room at hearing all the screaming.

"Shizuo help me hold him down!" Shinra yelped as Izaya tried to shake him off; Shizuo ran to the two males fighting and grabbed the flea roughly by the arms.

"NO NO NO LET ME DIE!" Izaya screamed as both of his arms were held behind his back.

"Calm down Izaya, if you don't I'll have to give you something that'll make you calm down." Shinra said as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a syringe of some unknown liquid.

"NO NO NOOOO!" Shinra approached the two males with the syringe; Izaya thought quickly before swinging his head back and slamming it into the blondes. Shizuo gasped and let go of the brunet as the sheer shock of being hit hard in the face.

"Don't come near me!" Shinra and Shizuo starred at the informant with wide eyes as he held the barrel of the gun to his head.

"Izaya...put the gun down." Shinra said calmly, he had dealt with these kinds of people before and knew what to do to talk them out of killing themselves.

"NO!" Izaya barked, tears started rolling down his cheeks again as he laid his finger on the trigger.

"Don't kill yourself Izaya." Shizuo said, he had no idea why he cared if the flea shot himself...something about the way Izaya was crying...made him feel weak all over. Izaya bangs fell in front of his eyes as he lowered his head...Shizuo had just said his name.

"Why the hell do you care? This is what you've wanted since the day we met...for me to die." Izaya cried

"Don't kill yourself...don't…" Shizuo repeated, he really didn't know what else to say.

"...You should know by now Shizu-chan...That I never do anything you say..." Izaya said as he pressed the trigger on the gun; blood splattered onto the floor as the bullet dug deep into the side of the informants head.

"IZAYA!" Shizuo and Shinra screamed in horror as the smaller male fell to his knees and collapsed onto the floor.

Author's Note: Sorry for the late update, I'm sick and staying home today so I thought writing this would take my mind off of it. I hope you liked this chapter and I'll be trying to write the next soon! Oh and don't forget to review please!