Chapter 7: Battle of the Mind
A/N: Here's chapter 7. I want to thank all of those who have read and reviewed this story so far. It means a lot to me, and I hope that you will enjoy this chapter. Feel free to leave a review after you've finished reading.
Disclaimer: Don't own them though I truly wish I did. They're owned by Peter Laird and Mirage.
Leo's journal entry
I had the nightmare again. It's usually the same thing every time. I know I should tell my family what happened to me, but I'm not ready. I'm afraid of what they might do once they hear what happened. Raph will get angry and do something rash, Mikey will have nightmares for weeks, and Don and Splinter will be more protective of me than they are now. I'm just not ready to deal with all of that.
I'm also worried about the incident at the farm. I know the Foot are after us, and nothing will stop them once they're set on a goal. I guess the only thing we can do is steer clear of them, but I know it won't work. They'll never stop until we're destroyed.
We leave for Japan tonight, and I'm ready to go. I know it's the best thing to do right now. Even though Raph has forgiven me for what happened, I can't forgive myself. I almost injured him. What if I had killed him? I can't get over the fact that I lost control again. I have nightmares where I've killed him or one of the others, and these nightmares are interspersed with the other ones I've had.
I guess the only thing I can do is just try to deal with this. I really don't want to tell my family any of this, but I know I can't keep it from them. They already know I have nightmares, and I'm just waiting for Master Splinter to ask me about them. If he does, I can't lie to him, so I'll just have to come clean. It's all I can do right now.
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Leonardo closed his journal with a snap. Ever since they'd learned how to write, Master Splinter had encouraged them to jot down their thoughts in a journal because it would help them to relieve stress and anxiety. Each year Splinter gave them new journals so that they had a spare one to use. Leo wasn't sure if his brothers wrote in their journals, but he did because it really did help him out. He hid it in a special place so nosy brothers (especially Mikey) couldn't see what he'd written.
After he hid his journal, Leo headed downstairs to see what was on television. He saw Master Splinter come out of his room and bowed to show respect to his father.
Splinter returned the bow and smiled at his oldest son. "Would you like to join me for tea, Leonardo?" he asked.
"Sure, Sensei," Leo replied. He followed his father into his quarters and saw that the tray containing two teacups and the teapot was already set out. The blue-clad Turtle sat opposite his father and let him pour the tea.
"How have you been feeling, my son?" Splinter inquired.
"I'm fine," Leo replied. "I don't feel pain anymore. Don says I'm fully healed."
"Yes, I know that," Splinter told him. "I was asking about your mental well-being. For someone to suffer as you did, I would expect your mental state to suffer."
Well, Leo had been right when he'd predicted that Splinter was going to ask him about his mental state. He knew the best thing to do was to come clean about everything. "I keep having the same nightmares," he said. "Most of them have to do with what happened to me." He didn't elaborate further, and he fervently hoped his sensei wouldn't ask anymore about it.
"And what are the other nightmares about?" Splinter asked instead.
"Well, they involve what happened at the farm when…I attacked Raph," Leo answered hesitantly.
Splinter mused on what his son was telling him. "I can understand the dreams regarding what transpired in those two months you were gone," he began. "What concerns me are the ones regarding what transpired in the barn with your brother. Have you spoken with Raphael about the incident?"
"I apologized to him after he led me back to the farmhouse," Leo informed him. "He forgave me and said he understood."
"Then if your brother has forgiven you for the attack, why do you still have these dreams?"
"Because I feel guilty," Leo responded.
"You should feel no guilt," Splinter told him. "No harm was done. The problem is that you need to forgive yourself for what happened."
"But I can't!" Leo burst out. "No matter how hard I try to tell myself it wasn't my fault, the more my inner voice says it is. What can I do, Master?"
Splinter put a paw on his son's shoulder. "Do not fret, my son," he soothed. "Some battles can be fought by one while others must be fought by many. A battle of the mind is one of the hardest battles one must face. However, if you speak of your fears to those who can help you, you will be able to fight and win."
"I understand, Sensei," Leo said softly. "It's just that I don't know when I'll be ready."
"Listen to your heart, Leonardo," Splinter advised. "It will tell you when you are ready."
"I'll try, Master Splinter," Leo promised.
"That is all I ask of you," Splinter replied. Then he changed the subject to other matters. Splinter knew Leonardo didn't want to discuss his ordeal yet, but he had a feeling that if his son didn't face his fear, it would consume him and possibly destroy him. The father in him was determined to make sure such a thing didn't happen. He would do anything to protect his family at any costs, just as his sons would do anything to protect him.
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"Are we there yet?" Mikey whined as he gazed out the window of the ship for signs of land.
"Mikey, it's only been a few hours," Don pointed out. "It'll take us a few days to reach Japan."
"Well, we should've gotten on a faster ship," Mikey complained. "This one's too slow."
"Take it up with the captain," Raph retorted. "Maybe that'll make the ship go faster."
"I'll pass," Mikey replied. "He'd probably faint in terror and leave us stranded in the ocean."
"Michelangelo, enough," chastised Splinter. "Leonardo has a headache, which is probably worse now because of your incessant complaining. If you are not satisfied with the pace, perhaps you would like to swim to Japan, which would take even longer than the ship to reach land."
Mikey became silent since he knew Splinter was right. He reached into his bag and pulled out a comic book and his makeshift reading light that Donatello had made for all of them. He was worried about his older brother's condition and what had prompted the headache. He figured it had to be stress over what had happened at the farm. After hearing about Leo's attack on Raph, he began to avoid his older brother because he was afraid he was next. Mikey didn't know that Leo knew of this and that it made him feel worse, prompting the nightmares.
Don reached into his bag and produced some Tylenol. "Take these, bro," he said, handing them to his brother. Leo thanked Don and washed the pills down with a bottle of water. Hopefully it would ease the pain that was making his head throb.
The rest of the next few days were spent with various amusements, though there wasn't much to do. Mikey would play games with them, or some of them would read books or listen to music. Once they arrived in Japan, they stole cautiously off the ship and set out to where the Ancient One lived. They took every precaution they could for they knew it would be dangerous if they were spotted by anyone. Leonardo took the lead since he had been to the Ancient One's temple before and knew exactly where it was. It was cold as they traveled through the mountains, and Mikey joked that his feet were going to fall off, causing Splinter to thump him soundly with his walking stick.
As night fell, the family decided to set up camp. Leo built a fire while the others set up their sleeping bags. Their dinner consisted of trail mix and water, though Splinter had brought tea for those who wanted it.
"Man, I don't know how you did this, Leo," commented Mikey. He was about to say more when a sound made him jump in surprise. "W-what was that?" he asked, looking around.
"Demon ghosts coming up the trail," replied Leo calmly.
Mikey's eyes widened in shock. "Demon what?" he gasped.
"Calm down, Mikey," advised Leo. "They won't bother us if we don't bother them. Just stay quiet."
The Hamato clan watched as the demon ghosts made their way down the trail. They looked frightening, but they paid no attention to the group around the fire. They acted as though Splinter and his sons weren't even there.
Until Mikey sneezed.
Enraged by the noise, the demon ghosts turned and made their way toward the group, their swords raised.
Mikey shrugged his shoulders as his brothers glared at him. "I couldn't help it," he said, trying to look innocent.
"Heads up, guys!" Raph yelled as he withdrew his sais. "Looks like we're gonna have a fight on our hands."
"Raph, wait!" Leo cried. "You can't fight them. There's no way you'll be able to win."
"So, what do you propose we do?" asked Raph as he blocked a sword with his sai.
"You have to surrender," replied Leo.
"Are you nuts?" demanded Raph. "There's no way I'm givin' up to them."
"Suit yourself," said Leo. "You'll only end up with your head missing." As a ghost came to him, Leo stood and surrendered just as the Ancient One had advised him to do. But instead of leaving him alone, the ghost knocked him to the ground. Leo was shocked. This wasn't supposed to happen.
Raph smirked. "I guess surrenderin's not an option," he said.
"I don't understand," said Leo. "This isn't what happened last time."
"Maybe they're different demon ghosts," suggested Don as he blocked an attack with his bo staff.
"No, they're the same ones," replied Leo. "I'm sure of it."
"Well, if surrendering doesn't work, what the shell are we supposed to do?" asked Mikey fearfully.
"Perhaps you should tap into your chi," advised Splinter as he blocked a sword with his walking stick.
"Good idea," said Leo. Closing his eyes, he tapped into his chi and started to glow blue. Startled by the blue light surrounding the Turtle, the ghost gave a cry and retreated. As soon as they saw this, the other Turtles followed suit and scared away their ghosts as well. Master Splinter also managed to frighten his ghost, though he didn't have an aura around him as his sons did.
Once the ghosts were gone, the family settled down and ate some chocolate for dessert, talking about the event. Leo still couldn't get over how the ghost didn't acknowledge his surrender and continued to fight him. No one had an answer to this, so he dropped it. Splinter then suggested that they get some rest since they still had some traveling to do. The Turtles agreed and settled down into their sleeping bags.
Raphael was awakened by Leo crying out after yet another nightmare. They were getting more frequent, and Raph could guess what they were about based on Leo's muttering. He moved closer to his brother and started rubbing his shell soothingly. Leo relaxed as his brother rubbed his shell and eventually went back to sleep. Raph knew that Leo's ordeal wasn't over yet and wouldn't be until he talked about what was bothering him.
The next day the Hamato clan got up early (much to Mikey's dismay) and continued on with Leo in the lead. Splinter had decided to let his son lead since he had been to the temple before and had faith that he knew where he was going. The other Turtles had doubts, but they chose to trust their older brother. Soon they came to what would normally be a dead end to most, but Leo knew it was where the temple was located.
"Which way now, Leo?" asked Raphael.
Leo smiled. "Up,' he said. "The temple of the Ancient One is beyond this cliff."
"You mean we gotta climb all the way up there?" asked Mikey incredulously. "Why can't we take an elevator?"
"Because there isn't one, Mikey," pointed out Don.
And so the family made their way up the cliff face. Leo lost his footing a couple of times, but he managed to regain it with some help from Raph. Mikey joked that he'd need a foot massage after this, which caused Splinter to bap him on the head again.
When they reached the top, Leo led them to the front doors. Mikey, Don, and Raph gasped at the size of the temple and figured that the Ancient One had to be living fairly comfortably. Mikey even predicted that there'd be a flat screen TV and gaming system in there.
Once they entered, they saw a stone statue that was set near them. Before the Turtles and Splinter could move any further, the statue came to life and stood before them, its sword raised. The Turtles took out their weapons and got into a fighting stance, wondering what the statue would do.
"Who enters the temple of the Ancient One? " demanded the statue.
"Hamato Splinter and his sons," replied Splinter.
"We must battle to prove that you are worthy to enter," said the statue.
"Bring it on!" growled Raph, his eyes narrowed in anger.
"I will not fight all of you," said the statue. "I will fight only one who feels he is worthy to battle me. Who will it be?"
"I'll do it," answered Leo. "I've done this before, and I can do it again."
"Are you sure, bro?" asked Raph.
Leo nodded. "Yes, I'm sure," he said. "I can do this."
"Very well," said the statue, and he got into a fighting stance that matched Leo's. "Let the battle begin."
Leonardo was determined to beat the statue and prove he was worthy. As he battled, he thought he'd be able to defeat the statue easily. However, every time he was hit, horrible images kept plaguing his vision and distracted him from the fight. He tried to shake his mind of the visions, but nothing was working. He began to falter in his attacks, and the statue began to dominate. Leo suffered many blows which caused him to see horrible things referring to the torture he endured with the Foot and things that were happening to his brothers. It was all so real, and he couldn't escape it no matter how hard he tried.
"No, Leo!" Raph cried. He couldn't stand to see his brother beaten like that and decided to take matters into his own hands. He closed his eyes and concentrated as hard as he could until he felt himself transform into his dragon form. Teeth bared, he lunged at the statue and began to attack, swatting the statue with his tail. The statue tried to fight back, but Raph was too strong and caused the statue to break into pieces.
Don, Mikey, and Splinter were shocked at what they had seen but not as shocked as Raph. After resuming his normal form, he went to Leo's side and tried to pry off the pieces of the statue that were covering him. Don and Mikey hurried over and helped extricate Leo from the wreckage. He wasn't moving and looked wounded.
They heard footsteps and turned to see the Ancient One hurrying to them. "What happened?" he asked as he came to their side.
"This statue told us he needed to fight one of us to see who was worthy," replied Raph. "Leo took the challenge, but didn't do so well, so I helped. What was up with that statue?"
"The Tribunal set up that statue to protect me," answered the Ancient One. "I did not know you were coming, or I would have warned you. What brings you here, Splinter-san?"
"We will discuss the answer to your question later, Ancient One," replied Splinter. "For now we must attend to Leonardo."
The Ancient One saw Leo and was shocked. "Bring him in," he ordered. "He is wounded and needs attending to."
The Turtles and Splinter picked Leo up and carried him to the Ancient One's headquarters. All of them were hoping that the oldest Turtle would be okay, and they whispered this to him as they carried him to safety. They only wanted Leonardo to hear them and pull through this.
"C'mon, Leo, snap out of it," begged Mikey.
"You can do it, Leo," encouraged Don.
"Please wake up, bro," whispered Raph.
"Come back to us, my son," said Splinter.
Leo didn't respond, and they feared this was one battle he had lost.
A/N: And that's the end of the chapter. So, will Leo live or not? You'll have to keep reading to find that out. Feel free to leave a review once you've finished reading to tell me what you think. Thank you, and have a shell-tastic day.