Okay guys, this is quite a long one because I didn't wanna leave you guys with a short chapter and a cliffhanger; there's a good chance I won't be uploading in a while. I see where I'm going with this but it's the fact that I (honestly) can't be bothered to write. So yeah, thanks for viewing guys, and REVIEW! :D xxx
We grabbed a table nearest the door when we got down to the bar. It didn't really feel real, now that I could drink alcohol in America. Last time I checked, I was 15, waiting for the time to come where I could drink legally. Jess ordered us beers and both of the girls were being surprisingly nice to Jack who looked like he'd closed in on himself.
Jordan sat down opposite Jack and I and started giving me looks which meant she wanted to give me and Jack time to talk things over. I mouthed 'later' at her and she nodded. I could feel the tension between Jack and Jordan, the feeling of her wanting to literally kill him. Jess didn't say anything; she wouldn't because she knew if she said anything to Jack, I'd get annoyed.
Jack used his phone as a distraction, trying to have a texting conversation with Alex who couldn't completely understand what Jack's intentions were. He never realised I was looking over his shoulder at the texts until he glanced at me. I look away guiltily and I saw him smile out of the corner of my eye.
'Okay, that's it Barakat.' I said bluntly, making Jordan and Jess jump yet Jack expecting it. He looked at me blankly and I raised my eyebrows. Without a word and a quick glance at Jordan, I walked out of the bar and onto the lawn that was and was overlooking the city. It was a cold night so the bar was packed inside yet dead outside. Jack followed me out, and followed my gaze to where I was looking which wasn't anywhere in particular.
Jack was breathing so heavily I could hear him over the loud, drunken laughing sounds that were coming from inside the bar. I could sense he knew exactly what I was going to ask him about and this time I was adamant that I would get the truth out of him. I looked back at the girls sat at the table just out of earshot and saw Jordan was looking at me wearily. I nodded at her and she went back to her conversation with Jess.
I turned back to Jack who did that cute smile that always made my heart melt. We stayed silent for a few moments before I opened my mouth.
'Jack, seriously what the hell is going on?' I asked him. He sighed and put away his phone and turned to face me.
'I've told you over and over again; nothing's going on.'
'You're lying.'
'I'm not!' I hissed through gritted teeth. I raised my eyebrow and crossed my arms.
'You are, Jack. You're my best friend and I know when you're lying and right now it has never been so obvious.' I replied. Jack put his hands on my arms and I let him unfold them.
'Come with me.' I let Jack slid his hands to clasp hold of my hands and pulled me away from the bar. I looked back at Jordan who's eyes widened with shock but she mouthed the words 'text me' before she disappeared from view. Before I knew it, Jack was leading back to his hotel room.
I stood outside Jack hotel door as he fumbled for the keys in his pocket, pulling out everything but the keys themselves. He started breathing heavily again as he tried and failed to get the keys into the door, missing the hole by a mile. His hands started to shake which made him worse. I had to do something.
'Hey, hey, Jack,' I said, squeezing his hand and taking the keys from him. 'Calm down.'
He stepped back and I let myself into the room which, for Jack, was surprisingly tidy. Jack stepped in like he'd never been in it before, curiously placing his bag on the table.
'Is Jasmine here?' I asked. When I didn't get a response, I turned to face Jack who shook his head and didn't say a word. I glanced at him but he looked away and blushed.
'Look Jack, why can't you just tell me what's going on? What's keeping you from it?' I asked him.
'Because it'll just fuck your life up again and I don't want to do that because I've already done it once.' He replied, making it sound like his fault which it wasn't... well, most of it wasn't.
'Jack, shut up. It was mainly me because of Alex and Jasmine and John. I'm not saying you didn't cause any of this because you're now back with Jasmine but—'
'What?' Jack interrupted.
'You're back with Jasmine.'
'I'm not back with Jasmine you donut.'
I looked back at Jack and my mouth dropped.
So if he wasn't back with Jasmine then what was he doing with her?
I went to open my mouth again but Jack pressed his finger to my lips. He gestured for me to sit down on the sofa so I did as I was told. Jack escaped to the room I assumed was his and I saw him fiddling around under his bed until he pulled out a small book will sticky labels and pieces of paper sticking out of it. He came back into the main room and handed me the book in his hand.
I looked at him and he looked at the book then back at me.
'Read it. Everything will make sense then. It starts from after you left.'
I stared at Jack, confused at what he was trying to say... until I started reading the book that was in fact a diary.
Oh my god...
It was his diary. I wanted to skim through the pages but Jack was watching me, knowing he wouldn't let me leave until I was done reading every word. Obviously, it wasn't every day and it was just once every couple of weeks but his feelings were painted on the page, so clearly for me to see.
'Jack I don't think I can read this.' I said to him, mid-sentence on the 12th page of his diary. He sat next to me and took the book away from me, flicking through a large portion of the pages and handing it back to me when he'd reached the page he was looking for.
Shit.
It was the day Jack and I split up. He'd written all about it in his diary.
'Please, Chloe just read it. You need to know because I'm a wimp and I can't tell you myself.' Jack whimpered quietly.
Tuesday, 19th April
I've never been more of an idiot in my life. I made the worst mistake I could possibly ever make and now I've lost my girlfriend and my friends in the process. I invited Jasmine back on tour with us. Purely a reason to shut her up but another reason to show her it really was over. It just felt right when I asked Chloe out, but now it's just crumbling around me. And now that Jasmine has fucked us all over by telling everyone on tour what Chloe and Alex did, I'm truly screwed. The boys aren't talking to me, and even when they are, it's to yell at me. I'm a complete failure. But what made it worse was that Chloe cheated on me again with Alex. I mean, I can barely believe Jasmine but something's telling me it's true. Chloe's left now and she's gone to stay with The Maine, but I'm hoping she'll come back. I miss her so much and she means the world to me but we both made the wrong decisions. I thought that hopefully, it would make her see we really are so much alike and are meant to be together but obviously she hasn't seen it. I said to myself I'd get over her but now it's proving to be next to impossible. Anyway, Alex is coming and I don't want him to see my diary. No-one's ever read it before and I don't want now to be the time.
[JACK'S POV]
I just looked at her when she read but I glanced down every now and again to estimate where she was. Chloe was always the faster reader of us both so she was probably further down than I was. When she finished reading, she looked up at me with tear-filled eyes. I turned the corner of my mouth up, giving her an awkward smiled but I knew she wasn't believing me.
Without another word, I took my diary off of her again and flicked to the last time I'd written an entry in the diary... last night. She tried not to stare at the paper, but it was all too much.
'Move over.' I said softly, and she shifted in the middle of the sofa and patted the spot next to her for me to sit down. She sat cross-legged, on the sofa with my diary in her lap and I leaned over so I could read over her shoulder. With Chloe being in possession of all my thoughts and feelings, I felt like I was letting everything I've ever bottled up out. I couldn't decide whether it was good or bad. I read with her and slowly slipped my arm around her shoulders. Instantly, she slid into my arms and lifted her knees up, leaning against my body like a perfect fit.
But she had Louis...
I dismissed the thought from my mind and tried to concentrate on reading my own diary,
Sunday, 13th April
There's not much I can say really. I've been denying it for all these years and now I finally admitted it to my last night... I still love Chloe.
When I read the words myself, I froze.