Warmth seeped into her body as her bleary eyes woke to a soft washcloth swiping the contours of her face. Extra care was taken as the salt deposits from last night's tears were rubbed from the corners of her eyes.

When had she fallen asleep? She hated losing time, falling away when someone spoke to her. Did she disappear?

"Good morning, sweet girl," the cherubic grin of her former lover greeted her.

She tried so hard to form a reply, but all that escaped was a barely audible grunt.

Even though she wasn't sure how long she'd been out of it, she knew it had been a long time since she'd been given a decent bath and part of her longed to be submerged in a scalding hot tub full of fragrant bubbles, while she scoured and exfoliated, shaved and cleansed. Her hair felt like a greasy mass and she daydreamed about her long, thin fingers pulling an exotic scented shampoo through the strands.

The cloth went away and she sighed at the loss of warmth until she heard the water trickling in the basin beside her. It returned to the column of her neck, pressing into the tiny lines that formed around there, the leftover water pooling in the hollow of her throat.

His hands continued to work down the length of her arms, swirling in soothing patterns and encircling each finger, methodically scrubbing the surface. It felt so nice and comforting to feel the tenderness of his touch, watch the caring expression of his gaze, the concentration as his eyes squinted and lips puckered.

Longing eyes stared at the center of her palm. Was he remembering when he used to place a gentle kiss there? It was sort of their unspoken "I love you", before they had actually uttered the words.

A loud, wistful sigh escaped his mouth and she imagined he did remember. Good. She hoped it hurt him as much as it hurt her to know her hands would never hold his kisses again.

"May I?" he asked permission, fingering the hem of her hospital gown.

Was he honestly expecting an answer? Did he not realize her inability to speak? And if she could speak, would she allow him the honor of seeing her naked flesh? That was the real question and a question she wasn't sure she could answer in the negative.

Instead, her eyes pleaded with him and her breath quickened to the point of nearly hyperventilating.

No! Please don't!

Yes! Please, touch me! Kiss me! Caress me!

"Sorry, sorry..."

What?

"I can't do that to you. I don't know what you want me to do."

Tears streamed down her cheeks again, unbidden.

"No, love. Please don't cry. I'm sorry."

The warm washcloth wiped her eyes and nose clean.

"Do you want me to?"

Instantly, the tears dried up. Her breath quickened. Dammit, her body had betrayed her.

"I'll be careful, love. You know I will."

Yes, but will you be as careful with my heart as you will my body?

Trembling fingers searched behind her neck for the strings that held the loose material together. The fingers worked quickly and the gown drooped around her neck. Their eyes met and held, while their breaths panted in unison.

"I-I'll try not to look."

Look all you want, Edward. You'll never have it. I'll never give it to you.

The gown slipped easily down her body, until it had been completely removed and she lay bare and shivering before him.

"I'm sorry. You're cold." It wasn't a question.

A sheet was pulled around her, covering her private areas.

"I'll be right back. This water has run a bit cold."

Leaving. He was leaving again. Leaving. Leaving. Leaving!

"Hey, hey, stay with me, sweetheart. I'm here. I'm here."

Her eyes regained focus and stared into his. He came back. He came back!

"Let's get you cleaned up before you catch a cold, okay?"

A part of her was annoyed that he'd ask her, as if expecting an answer, but part of her really liked it that he tried. It made her feel a little bit like they were actually conversing. It made this whole ordeal a tiny bit less awkward. Only a tiny bit.

Water trickled on the table near her feet and a steaming hot cloth came into view. The soft, warm cloth swept across her collarbone, back and forth, back and forth. Her senses dulled as she relaxed with the sensation.

"I hope it's not TOO hot. Alice assures me it's perfect."

Alice was there? Where was she? Were all the Cullens here?

"She misses you, you know. I'm so sorry I made her stay away."

Alice didn't have to listen to everything he told her. She could have told Edward to fuck off and do what she wanted. She doubted Edward truly had THAT much power.

He seemed to notice the slight furrow of her brow, as her face became more expressive with each passing day that she remained awake and engaged. His finger reached out to smooth the crease that formed. Bella's eyes closed momentarily, welcoming the contact.

"She wanted to stay. Really, she did. It's just...the things she saw. She had to go."

The furrow grew deeper.

"There were visions of me going to the Volturi. Trying to provoke them to end my life. I just...I couldn't..."

He swallowed hard in an attempt to reign in his emotions, "I couldn't be in a world where you didn't exist."

Had she asked him to? No, he just decided what was best and left.

"Originally, Alice saw us returning in a week or two. Being away from you proving too difficult for me to maintain."

But?

"Unfortunately, Victoria had other plans."

Victoria? What had happened to her? Hadn't she left after they had destroyed James?

Edward remained silent after that. How could he not know she had more questions? What more did he have to add to the story?

His voice broke her reverie. "I know what you're thinking, Isabella. I'm not telling you that. Not right now. Not when you're still this fragile."

She could only imagine what that could mean.

"I will tell you, Bella. Make no mistake about it. Not today, though."

The washcloth dipped lower, skimming the tops of her breasts, but dipping no lower.

"I just got you back," he whispered, lowering his eyes.

He set the washcloth inside the bowl and gathered her hair into his hands, twisting a rubber band around it into a ponytail. His fingers lingered longer than necessary, stroking the strands.

Ocher eyes stared into hers.

"I can't let you fade away again."

He pulled her forward, into a haphazard hug, and wrung out the washcloth again, swirling it in hypnotic circles around her back, then trailing up and down her spine.

"I can't let you leave me."

Leave who? He left me!

"You'll go back to being this catatonic zombie and I just can't endure that. Knowing I did that to you. I hurt you once, Bella. I'll never do it again. I'm going to stay. I'm going to protect you."

A small sob choked his voice.

"I'll be with you. Forever."

The washing ceased and he buried his nose into her neck, holding her close and gently rocking her.

It was the most peace she'd felt in a really long time.