A/N Did I scare you guys with the last chapter? I swear, it gets happier! And sexier! But I noticed that I did something clever without realizing it at the time: I gave two choices, made Robin seem like he was going for one, and then bam! The other happened! Oh, the cleverness of me! Anyways, review! I'll probably update at least one more time this weekend, if I'm encouraged lol.
P.S. I don't appreciate being bitten, just so you all know that. *Looks pointedly at a certain reviewer*
Disclaimer: I do not own!
Chapter Five: Kill Your Heroes
The previous leader of the Teen Titans curled up into a ball, gasping for air that didn't seem to be doing anything for his body. Robin hadn't actually been kicked off the team, at least not yet, but he couldn't even comprehend the idea of going back to being a hero. Not only had he broken his one and only rule, but he'd crossed a line. A line that Bruce had warned him about. A line that not even Batman would cross because he wouldn't be able to come back. And now his protege, his adopted son, his ward, was on the opposite side. Tears steamed out of the black-haired boy's eyes though he wasn't really crying. He was in a panic, what was he going to do? He couldn't actually be Robin anymore, and he couldn't go back to Bruce and be Richard. He had no name, no where to go, and it seemed no soul.
"Kid, I know you've probably been through a lot tonight, but some of us are trying to sleep over here." A gruff voice called out from the corner opposite of Robin and the teen gave a startled yelp. His hands began shaking even more, slipping even farther into a panic. Suddenly a light flared in the dark as a match was lit and a second later the owner of the voice, an old man with ice blue eyes and long gray hair with a beard to boot, held up a freshly lit lantern. The man studied him for a moment then gave a tired sigh. "If I'd a known I was gonna be in the company of a hero I'd a dressed up more." A crooked smile full of rotting teeth cause Robin to shrink back farther into his corner, though he'd gotten a hold of himself. It was silent for a couple of beats before the old man grew uncomfortable. "I'm Gene."
"Robin." Came the shaky reply from the teen, who was still curled up in a ball. The man gave another smile this time accompanied by a gurgling laugh that turned into a violent hack.
"I knew that." Gene wheezed out while he struggled to get his lungs to work right. "So, what's a hero like you doin' riding the rail?"
"I killed someone." Came the "hero's" answer, blunt and unfeeling. Gene's eyes widened slightly and he set down the lantern. It cast a warm glow around the rest of the car and Robin was relieved to see that they were alone. It seemed that the man had nothing to say to that because he simply turned around and began rummaging through his stuff. Robin turned and stared blankly up at the stars. It was funny, no matter how fast they moved, the stars always stayed in the same place.
"Here." Robin looked back at Gene just in time to catch the bundle of black and gray that came hurtling towards his face. The teen looked down puzzled. It seemed as if the old man had thrown him a black shirt and some gray sweat pants. "Listen kid, I'm just an unlucky old man. The rest of the guys who ride these rails? They're the type of guys you, or used to, put behind bars. Okay? So it might be in your best interest to be someone else, okay?"
"Okay." Robin finally answered and Gene turned around while he changed into the old clothes. They were baggy and ancient, but they seemed clean and there weren't any holes in them so Robin figured he'd gotten lucky. "What do I do with this?" The teen gazed dully at his old uniform, the bright colors reminding him of his life before Batman. There was a pang in his chest, but he was so used to the feeling that he dismissed it. That worked until he began thinking about his team, and how his life had once again changed drastically. The black-haired boy gasped, falling into a small depression as he slid to the floor. He had lost it all, and there was no millionaire to come pick up the pieces like last time.
"The question is," Gene began, assuming that ignoring the tears from the hero was the best tactic, "do you want anyone to find you?" This stumped Robin for a little, and he had to think about it logically. But at least it gave him something to do, something to focus on rather than his messy emotions. Did he want the rest of the Titans to come after him? They were probably really mad at him, but then they'd find some excuse and try to get him back. Would he go back? Would he agree and go along with their little reason, trying to fool everyone-including themselves? Could he do that to himself? Could he know that deep-down he was a murderer, no better than those he put in jail, and yet continue to fight crime? Could he face his friends, with that look in their eyes, knowing that he had broken his one and only rule; the one he had preached to them on many occasions?
"No. I don't want anyone to find me." He answered numbly, and Gene just gave a knowing nod before gesturing towards the scenery rushing by.
"Get rid of your past life, then." Robin swallowed, taking one last look at his uniform that represented all those years of fighting with his friends, and even went farther back. If he had let go of his parents and Bruce earlier, then this would be much easier. The teen was one who learned from past mistakes, and with a look of conviction, he threw the multicolored fabric out and watched as it got caught in the wind. He followed it with his eyes for as long as he could, noting how it billowed in the strong gusts created by the train, dancing along as if there was someone still in it. My soul's still in there, Robin thought to himself. And now I'm left with the hollow body of a murderer.
Robin woke up as the brakes of the train began to squeal, signaling their stop. The teen looked around, the early morning light making things easier to see, but couldn't spot his companion from last night. "Gene!" He whispered; then he saw some movement from the far right corner, diagonal from him. Slowly Gene emerged from under a heap of old sacks and other trash-like objects. Robin sighed in relief, he thought something had happened while he had been asleep. "What's going on?"
"This is a checked stop, either you need to get off before we stop completely or you need to hide like me." Was the muffled reply, on account of the fact that Gene hadn't gotten all the way out of his pile and was actually covering himself back up.
"Where are we exactly?"
"Gotham." Robin resisted the urge to groan. Everything was just so damn coincidental! Here he was, back where he had started his second out of three lives, about to attempt his fourth. It just wasn't fair, why didn't thinks ever work out for him? The teen briefly entertained the idea of visiting Bruce as Richard, but then remembered just exactly what he had done and decided against it. The man was probably furious, or even worse, disappointed in him. Yes, that was much worse than anger, and right now Robin simply couldn't deal with it. Though he doubted he would ever be able to, his mentor probably never wanted to see him again. The teen weighed his options, he could continue on with the train ride, going to who knows where, or he could get off and start a whole knew life right in the middle of an old one.
The train slowed considerably and there were shouts to be heard outside from the security. It was now or never. "I'm getting off." Robin told the mass in the corner before preparing to jump off of the still some-what moving train.
"Wait, kid before you go." The teen turned and looked over his shoulder, only to be met with two eyes that were an even brighter blue than his own. "Never let your fear decide your fate."
Robin nodded, accepting the advice. He'd mull it over later, but now he really had to go. The black-haired boy didn't look back as he jumped, hit the ground an rolled before ducking behind old railroad tracks that were stacked high. Then, as one final testament to his old life, he pulled off his mask. The bright light flooded his eyes and he began walking, ready for whatever came his way. As he moved towards town, he began thinking. He needed a new name, but he didn't want anything that gave his identity away. The teen thought hard. Richard and Robin. Obviously he needed something that started with an R, to at least keep some of himself in it. He wanted something young, new, something without ties to he previous lives. Race. The name came to him immediately and the teen couldn't deny it. From that point on, he was Race Gray.
The city was just as he remembered it: dirty, dark, and full of life. Race already missed Jump, but he couldn't look back. Not now, not ever. It was hard for the teen to believe that they had traveled so far in just one night, but here he was, making his way towards downtown. He had no idea where he was going to stay, but it was morning so he had the whole day to figure it out. Race attracted a lot of stares, seeing as how he was in short sleeves while everyone else was bundled up. Fall in Gotham wasn't as passive as it was in Jump. The teen easily merged himself into the crowd of business men heading towards work. He was actually happy with his rash decision to get off the train at his former city, at least he knew his way around.
Race glanced longingly at the roof tops as he was jostled roughly for what seemed the millionth-time in just 30 minuets. It really was a much faster way of travel, and he longed to breathe in the distinctive Gotham air while he flew through it. That would have to wait until later, though, because for now he didn't even know where he was going. An hour later, the teen found himself on the coastline a couple minuets outside of downtown. He faced the island of Arkham asylum, only the long bridge connecting the two land masses.
With a sigh Race sat down and began to think. He'd disappointed so many people. His team, his mentor, the people of his city, Slade... At that last name the black-haired boy's breath caught in his throat. Slade. He'd forgotten all about Slade after he'd killed Plasmus! The man was sure to be furious with him, he was one of those people that if he told you to meet him somewhere, you did. Panic began welling up in the teen until he laughed at him self. Here he was, miles away, living a new life with a new identity that no one would be able to track, and he was worrying about Slade! It was quiet as Race tried to direct his thoughts on more current matter. With a sigh he just decided that he'd sleep in an empty warehouse or something. As if to make fun of him, the wind picked up and Race shivered. He grumbled as he got up, starting his search for supplies. It seemed as if he would have to steal, but it wasn't like he wasn't already a murderer or anything.
A/N Sooooo? Give me feedback please! Was the whole Robin-Race thing confusing? Because I felt as if I couldn't call him Robin at that point in time, but don't worry, he'll go back eventually. I'll try to regulate my updating but no promises. Review! Review! And, what else was I going to say...oh, that's right, review!