"You were pretty blunt in there," Megan said to Roger the next morning admiringly. They were sitting in a coffee shop, debriefing after an early meeting.
"Well, you have to tell it like it is, or else they will get false expectations and it will come back and bite you in the ass later on. I don't believe in using white lies anymore, however good and pure my intentions are. It's a lesson that I finally mastered a few months ago, and it cost me dearly, so I'll never forget it.
"It cost you a business deal?"
Roger sighed. "Yeah, that too."
The door opened and a pretty redhead made her way to the back of the shop. Roger's thoughts shifted to Holly, as it always did when that happened. His mind drifted to her laugh, her voice, the way she looked at him in the morning when they had just woken up. At times, he would have visions of her with other men. Other times, and these were the worst, he would dream that she was coming back to him, calling his name, only to snap back to reality with shattered hopes.
She was not an easy woman to forget.
But he had to try, at least for the time being. Every time he felt like calling her, or just showing up at her door, which was several times a day, he remembered the knife she had pointed at her own throat and the drop of blood breaking away from her creamy skin. The memory scared him more than anything else ever had.
It had been at this exact moment that Roger had understood the depth of Holly's love for him, but also the depth of her pain. He was shit-scared that she would try again if he went back to plead for her forgiveness.
No, there was no going back now.
He would have to undergo a deep transformation before he could face her. He would have to search his soul. He would have to put his monstrous ambition to good use instead of being consumed by it.
He did not know yet if he was capable of that, of being honest, of staying away from the white lies, but he sure as hell would try his best, he thought as he peered though the window. Every redhead he crossed in the street made him work harder, every memory of her, good or bad, made him strive towards his goal. He knew that failing meant never seeing her again.
He was not going back unless he could offer her what she deserved.
How he loved her. Sometimes, it was almost too much to bear.
"Roger? Are you ok?"
He realized that Megan was staring at him with a concerned face. She was so beautiful, he thought, and it was plain that she was attracted to him. In some ways, she reminded him of two of his ex-lovers, Mindy and Jenna. She was like Mindy in that she was so confident in her own charm and like Jenna because she was smart and shrewd. It would be easy to fall into her arms. He felt so lonely at times.
He was again drifting into his own thoughts when he saw Holly crossing the street in front of the shop. At first, he thought that it was just another vision, just another redhead, but his body started moving before his mind had had time to register what was going on. He was already at the door when something made him stop in his tracks. She was not alone, he realized, she was with Fletcher Reade. His eyes immediately zeroed in on Fletcher's hand, stroking the small of Holly's back. Even from the distance, he could see that it was not a friend's touch. Roger felt rooted on the spot. Holly and FLETCHER?
In what world was this possible? He looked at the sky, half-expecting it to be green.
Fainting felt like a very valid option at that point, but, being the man that he was, he just threw his carefully laid plans out the window and started running after them.