Yes… I know it's been a while ne… Gomenasai \(^_^")/

Anyway I wanted to wish everyone a Happy Chinese New Year...

Gong Xi Fa Cai !!!!

Breathe

Breathe Sayuri

I lay in my bed awake as the sun begins to peak through the window of my room at the headmaster's resident. I couldn't sleep and the only thing I could think off is the event of last night. It keeps replaying again and again, never having an ending.

Zero drank Yuki's blood.

So much blood.

After my arrival, came Kaname's. I've only seen him as angry as last night once and that was many years ago. His eyes were red with rage…kowai.

Kaname had taken the task of taking Yuki to the infirmary leaving Zero, Otou-san and me standing in the corridor of the staircase. The headmaster had sent me away then, telling me to patrol the school fearing the Night Class may have gone lose after smelling the blood while Kaname was not around to control them. I didn't want to leave, Zero was both scared and disgusted with himself. I want to be there for him the way he was there for me all those years ago but Otou-san insisted on me continuing my duty. I haven't seen Yuki, Zero nor Kaname since last night.

I wonder how they are doing…

Why do I feel that they are so out of my reach…

The day was dull…Zero didn't come to class and Yuki ran out early, probably to look for Zero. I should be doing that but my body keeps telling me to stay put. Yuki should know what to do, her innocent will probably help Zero more than I ever could. Just like that I gave up on another important thing in my life.

He doesn't need me anymore.

No!! A voice screams in my head…my voice. I could never give up on Zero, I wouldn't!

But what should I do? Even if my mind want to go to him my body seem to remember memories that's best forgotten and cause fear to run up and down my spine thinking of last night scene.

Zero won't do anything stupid…would he?

Level-E ka? Kowai…

I'm such a coward.

Twilight came and still no Zero or Yuki but that's to be expected. The Day Class students seem to be under control for today and the Night Class went to class without any unwanted accident. All the while I avoided and dodging away from the Night Class president while still keeping my gaze on both the day class student and Aido-sempai, who's strangely haven't been causing any trouble.

It was only when I went to the headmaster office the next day did things seemed to be back to normal (as normal as it can be). I open the headmaster office door only to see Zero pin down on the office floor by an invisible weight and the headmaster standing over him with a gleam in his eyes while Yuki stand to the side wide eye. I could simply guest what the headmaster have done and entered the office fully, closing the door behind me with a quiet click causing the three occupant of the room to turn their attention toward me.

"Otou-san you're not harassing Zero again are you?" my weary voice shatters the silent in the office.

"What? Sayu-chan why do you say such thing to your father?!" came his predictable reply as he flung himself towards me but as I side steps he ends up on the floor.

I ignore the crying man at my feet and make my way towards Yuki causing the crying man to wail louder. When I was in front of her I lift her hand to examine the bracelet dangling from it.

"Sayu nee-chan? Are you feeling alright? You look pale.." Yuki small voice startled me and I drop her hand to look into her inquiring eyes.

"I'm fine…just a little tired." Giving her a reassuring smile I continue, "patrolling the school alone can do that to you I guest.."

"Gomen…we've should of help you.." sweet Yuki always thinking of everyone else.

"Iei, its fine. It's the least I can do.." I said shifting my gaze toward the boy that was still pinned to the floor.

When the headmaster finish talking to us (well Zero mostly which cause his face to be planted to the office floor) we begin to make our way to class until the headmaster's voice stop us, asking Zero to wait. Yuki and I take our leave then giving Zero some privacy. Halfway towards class, Yuki suddenly stop causing me to stop as she was walking in front of me.

"What is it Yuki?" I ask her.

"Ah..it's nothing." Seemingly to make up her mind she changes direction and start to go the opposite way.

"Yuki! Where are you going?" I wanted to chase after her but my leg was denying me the luxury, to tired to do more work then it have to.

"I need to do something…you go ahead first…" Yuki's hurried voice started to fade as she turns a corner. Sighing I continue to make my way towards the classroom, getting into my seat and fell asleep.

Shower…that's what I need.

The sentence repeated in my head as I headed to my room after finishing another night of patrolling the school grounds. I was glad Zero and Yuki helped tonight though I could feel the animosity radiating in the air when the Night Class was walking down the path towards school. Zero still wouldn't talk much with me but I let him be and went with my duty but I did catch up with him later in the night.

"Zero!!" my voice was carried by the wind toward the rigid figure leaning on a tree across the courtyard causing his already tense body to grow more stiff before loosening up at recognizing my presents.

"Sayuri…you should be patrolling not lazing off"

"Lazing?... Demo Zero you're the one that's doing it…"

He didn't say anything after that and continue to look everywhere else but at me. The silent stretch on and neither one of us was wiling to break it or just couldn't find the word to say. It was awkward.

"Zero…do you hate me now?" my quiet voice broke through the silent as I bow my head in shame.

Startled, Zero seems to be out of speech before he regain his composed demeanor and reply, "…why would I hate you Sayu-"

"Because I wasn't there!" I cut him off. "A-after all the things I promised you…I wasn't there for you…I've even been avoiding you! It's alright for you to hate me.." my heated voice drop to barely a whisper as I say that.

Zero stayed silent for a moment before approaching me so swiftly that I didn't even notice him move before he was already in front of me weaving his finger into my tangled hair.

"…I was…sad you weren't there……but I think I would be cruel to make you stay with me after witnessing what I've done" he said it with gentle voice as his hand that was unoccupied with my hair rose to my neck brushing against it causing my body to shiver at some unwanted memory.

"But Yuki-" I was cut of by him when he turn away from me dropping both of his arm to his side and begin to walk. Without glancing back he said, "You worry too much Sayuri…get some rest, you need it."

With that he left me alone in the courtyard before I took his advice and make my way toward my room.

My body shivers as my line of thought were broke when the water loses its warms and turns cold against my skin. Shaking my head a little to rid me of my conspicuous thought I reach to turn the shower off and wrap myself in a fluffy towel as I climb out of the shower stall. Drying myself, I continue to dress in my usual sleeping attire and walk out of the bathroom with the towel resting on my shoulders to block my wet hair from damping my cloth while fiddling with my pendant before tucking it into my shirt.

I pick my brush from the dresser and make to comb my hair but when I turn to face my room my heart nearly stop in shock causing me to drop the brush in my hand. There standing at a corner of my room was Kaname leaning his back next to the open window. A light breeze entered through the window causing my still body to quiver under its assaults.

"You really should learn to dry your hair Sayuri…you would get sick if you don't dry it off.." Kaname voice gently reprimand me causing me to flush a little remembering all the time Otou-san have to always help me to dry my hair because I was to lazy to do it myself though I enjoyed being spoil by him.

Kaname suddenly move from where he was leaning and came walking closer to where I stood and took the towel that was still hanging on my shoulders then begin to help me dry my hair. It was soothing for me to feel his gentle hands working with drying my hair.

"It seems that you still need me looking after you." I stay silent after hearing what he said with my head bow while he continues to dry my hair pausing at time to brush his lips lightly onto my forehead causing me to blush a shade darker every time earning me a low chuckle. Still I didn't say anything and resisted to bring my eyes to gaze at him and instead I concentrate at one of the button on his shirt. Blinking I finally realize that Kaname was no longer in his school uniform instead he was now dress in a loose and comfortable looking black shirt with a few of the top button undone.

"You've been avoiding me.." Kaname's voice startled me causing me to jump a little yet I continue to stay silent not wanting to answer the obvious statement. When not hearing any reply coming from me, he grew worried and call on my name once more though I continue my silent, keeping my head bow with my eyes downcast to avoid looking into his eyes but I'm sure he notice that I was softly leaning a little into him almost nuzzling my head into his chest like a kitten.

I could feel the warm breath Kaname release since his face was so close to me. He let the towel in his hands to fall to the floor to then raise said hand to hold it against my cheek bringing my face up to face his own.

When I was younger I hated how I was always the smaller one… I was even smaller then Yuki. Kaname was tall even then and the fact that he was so much taller then me then made me huff childishly. Whenever my three or four years old self wanted to hug him, I could barely reach up his waist. Otau-san always tease me saying I could never hug Kaname fully like I wanted to, always causing me to pout but Kaname would immediately pick me up from the floor after otou-san said that and let me cling onto his neck giving me a chance to hug him fully.

Even now I'm still a head shorter than him.

"Sayuri.." Kaname's voice broke me from my pondering. I focus my grey eyes onto his reddish-brown one as I let myself drown in his gaze not minding the feeling of vulnerability that sweep across my mind.

"How are you feeling Sayuri?" he left his true question unspoken.

Do you fear me-my kind now? After witnessing your dear Zero bit Yuki…have your fear for vampire grow?..

Thinking about Yuki cause my stomach to clench at the guilty feeling. I dodge from answering Kaname's question and instead offer him no answer.

"Forgive me for not being able to prevent what had happen…" Kaname remain silent after hearing what I said.

"…You didn't answer my question Sayuri…" his deep voice causes my nerve to jump.

I turn away from him, picking up the discarded towel and the forgotten hair brush and busy myself with combing my hair after dropping the used towel in a hamper and turn to face the window.

A warm body pressed onto my back cause the hand I was using to brush my hair to waver as warm breath tickles my ear. My body starts to tremble but not out of fear when a broad slender hand belonging to the person pressed on my back became entwined with my own small right hand, bringing our tangled hand up toward the vampire and his lips brush lightly against my fingers.

"Kaname…-sama" I said almost breathlessly as the pureblood bring his other arms around my stomach, just under my breast and bringing my body closer to his causing me to almost whimper.

Kaname move his face to bury them into my hair and I could hear him inhale in my scent. As content as I was I couldn't help the thought of the event of a couple of night before from running through my head. "Kaname-sama…you..were going to hurt Zero weren't you?" no words came from his lips as he tighten his hold on me. "At the staircase..if Yuki hadn't interfered…you were going to hurt him…weren't you?" I continue to press for an answer or a reply though in my heart I know the answer but I still cling onto the hope of receiving another answer.

"Hurt…is putting it lightly.." as he said this I could feel the strain in his arm as he try to control himself as to not crush me with his hold. Hearing his words cause my eyes to widen in horror and I make to turn to face him but he tightened his hold, stilling my body and preventing any further movement but my hand manages to break free to grab onto the dangling rose pendant on my neck that had fallen out from under my shirt from my sudden movement. I clasp onto it tightly with my trembling hand as I try to calm myself down.

Kaname hand that was holding my body close to him loosened and rose toward my clutching hand, letting his own settle on it. Turning me around in his hold, his rested his forehead against mine.

"You are my weakness Sayuri.." he whispered to me while his hand started to pry mine open to reveal the gleaming rose pendant. "...I wonder when it begin...this seperation...this distance between us...". My heart gave a joult hearing him say that.

Don't you remember Kaname-sama...

His left hand continue to hold my hand that held the pendant while he place his right hand on my neck, his thumb drawing soothing circle fingering my racing pulse.

"…I'm glad you're still wearing it." He said as he brush away a few stubborn strand of hair away.

I raise my hand to cup his face which he gently nuzzles into as his eyes fall shut. "I promise didn't I…to never take it off.."

Blinking his eyes open he locks his gaze with mine. "...You are mine…my little butterfly." His eyes blazing with intensity as he said it with such possessiveness that make my leg tremble. I don't know what to feel, every time I've come to term that he had choose Yuki over me, he went and do things or say things like this that make my heart soar and beat faster.

"You play me Kaname-sama" my weak voice was left hanging as my body traitorously began to fall asleep. Kaname wordlessly lift me up into his arm, one hand under my knees and the other behind my back and carried me to my bed where he lay me down tenderly.

"I do not mean too." He said as he brush my hair away from my face. He stood then and make to leave but my hand caught his sleeve and tug on it causing the vampire to halt his step.

"Please stay.." I was already half asleep when I said this but I wanted to feel his presence near me-the way it use too. He chuckle softly and said, "You still do need me looking after you." He then sat himself next to my half asleep form leaning his back on the headboard and I turn my body to snuggle into his warm body growing drowsier.

Before I fall into my dreamless slumber I hear him whisper into my ears with a sad voice that would of cause me to open my eyes if not for the fact that my body was already at its limit after three night of little sleep.

"Would you ever forgive me Sayuri…for causing you so much pain.."

I'll always forgive you Kaname-sama…even if you would bring me my death..I'll forgive you…because I love you too much to do otherwise.

Memories..

I almost had a panic attack when I've woken from my slumber to find myself in an unfamiliar room but slowly the memory of the past hectic days begin to resurface causing my blood to run cold remembering the house, my house, covered in blood. Thinking about it still cause shivers to run up and down my spine so much so that I begin to curl myself up again on the bed huddling into the blanket.

What had happen?

I never got a straight answer from the man that had saved me. He keeps on saying that I need to recover first before he told me anything that would be too damaging. But I'm not hurt…all my cuts have heal over and the bruises I've gain from fighting against who knows what had begin to fade so what more do I need to heal. I don't even remember anything of my short life so there was no attachment felt by me to the people that were murdered. The only reason I know it was my family was because my savior had said so.

I straighten up in the bed when the sound of door closing downstairs reaches my ears followed by soft footsteps and a familiar voice.

Otou-san?

My savior, Kaien Cross, not a day after he had rescued me he said he wanted brings me into the family, to adopt me. I didn't say anything, neither approve nor disapprove but I had to admit the warm feeling that spread throughout my body was welcomed, someone wanted me.

I emerge from the cover of the blanket and let my small feet touch the cold bedroom floor then begin to make my way towards the door. Opening the wooden door the muffled voice of my savior could now be heard clearly and I followed it downstairs to the living room but as I was about to turn the corner to the living room, another voice not belonging to my savior reached my ear causing my quick silent step to came to a halt. The voice was soft and monotoned yet have a distinct quality that could either make you shiver in fear or embrace in warm, it somehow cause my heart to beat faster.

I thought I've been caught when I heard 'Otou-san' said my name but on further inspection I realized that they were actually talking about me. I started to strain my ear to get a better understanding of what they were saying since their voice have dropped into a tone that was barely above a whisper. All the while I kept myself hidden behind the wall that separated the living room and the hallway towards the kitchen.

"…didn't understand how that could have happen.." Otou-san's voice was laced with confusion as he seem to be in a deep discussion with someone in the living room.

"And you're saying she didn't remember anything?.." hearing that smooth voice again cause my heart to skip a beat.

"No…it doesn't seem that she does. She was fighting off one of them when I arrive…well as much as a three year old can fight back but after I brought her to my house, she seem to be in a daze and the next day I had ask her if she remember what had happen the day before but she merely shook her head."

"…It may be best that she doesn't remember such nightmarish thing.." that voice though still monotoned was underlined with curiosity.

"I know…but…the memory of her family murder was not the only thing she forgotten." Otau-san's voice was almost depressing to be heard and I could almost imagine the great trouble swirling in his eyes.

"What do you mean?"

Sigh. "She was like a blank canvas Kaname-kun.." I finally got a name to put with the voice.

"She lost her memory?" I could hear the frown in 'Kaname-kun's voice. "But how do you know her name then?"

"Ahh, strangely the blank canvas was signed…I don't know how she had forgotten everything but her name…but I'm grateful that at the very least she has a piece of her past attached to the name….You know she wouldn't say a word to me at first, her name was the first thing that I've got out of her…" the man had smiled sadly while saying this.

"Sayuri Yukimura ka?..."

There was a long pause that causes my curiosity to burn high and I couldn't help but to peak out from behind the wall. I saw Otou-san first and following his line of vision my gaze greeted the sight of the young boy sitting across my savior. His burgundy eyes seems to glow behind long slightly wavy dark hair.

"Kaname-kun?"

"…Iei…that family name sound famil-" his words was cut off by the sound of the floorboard creaking. I stood frozen where I was haft in hiding and haft in view when two pair of eyes belonging to the occupant of the living room locked at my small form. When I had try to get a better view of the young boy I had move slowly more into the open, too entranced by the way the young boy's voice seem to flow like music notes to notice I had step into a loose floorboard.

Otou-san stood silently from his sitting position and motion for me to come to him. My small bare feet make little sound as I almost ran to the man I now call father feeling the gaze of the other occupant of the room lingering on me. My small form went to hide behind my saviors when I reach him, peaking an eye over to look on curiously at the boy on the opposite side of the room who still has his gaze lock on me.

Ba-Bump

My body starts to tremble when the invisible hold of the young boy on me seems to loosen and I manage to concentrate on his presence. I was unconsciously afraid of him. Even if I don't remember anything of my past I do remember red starving eyes staring hungrily at me. This boy had the same terrifying presence of those scary red eyes though his presence is far more stronger.

"…Vampire?.." My weak voice would have gone unnoticed by them if it wasn't for the fact that one of them was very close to me and the other has an enhanced hearing. Both of them was alarm at hearing the word that came out of my mouth, so much so that the impassive face of the visitor rearrange into that of a shock. His eyes widen slightly before any trace of emotion was wipe clean of his face not second after making me think that I had imagine the whole thing.

"What did you said Sayu-chan?" Otou-san had knelt in front of me cradling my face in his hands. He had took to calling me 'Sayu-chan' since he found out my name, it was only later that I found out he call me 'Sayu' because of how melancholic I have been. Sayu was a Malay word meaning sad or sorrowful. I almost throw a fit after finding out but my unknowing depressed body surrender early on and I let the matter be though it still irritates me to be addressed with such a disheartening name.

"Sayu-chan?" Otou-san's voice bring me out of my reverie as I turn to face him taking in his serious expression, tilting my head in confusion to what he was asking me. Seeing this he took to ask a more direct question. "Sayuri, how do you know about vampire?" he was using my full name instead of the nickname he gave me, it means that he was truly serious about this matter but I was more confused that before.

How did I know that?

I raked my brain trying to find how I know of the existence of the mythical creature but every time I think that I had it, it slips away leaving me more confused. I pushed more to get to the bit of information when something inside me snap and my mind and body move instinctually. Vampire came to eat me. It was a vampire that murdered my family…so much blood.

A horrifying shriek rips out of my lips and my body jerk further away from the young boy who I realize now was a vampire. I shield away into a corner, the trembling in my body doubled and at the corner of my eyes I could see that vampire was now staring at me openly with alarm and concern written across his face. I feel a warm body hovering above me causing me to curl more into myself hiding from whoever it was.

"Shhh… it alright Sayuri…I'm here." The soothing voice of my adopted father calm me down a little and my rasped breath begins to even out into smooth puff of air. He held my still trembling body tightly whispering soothing words into my ear. "It fine now…I'm here. No one is going to hurt you.."

Carefully he begin to disentangled myself from his hold once I had fully calmed down and turn my body to face the other occupant of the room while still griping on to me protectively. My body reacted before my mind know what had happen, I flung my body backward toward Otou-san chest and bury my head into his clothed front clinging onto his neck while his long hair tickle my face.

"May be it's best if I leave.." the sudden voice of the vampire cause my body to give a little jump but my previous curiosity of the boy cause me to turn my face over to him only to face with his retreated back but he was stopped by my father's voice.

"Nonsense Kaname-kun…please stay. I'm sure she'll calm down in a minute or so…see her body have even stop trembling." It was true my body had stop trembling and I kept my gaze on the vampire as he turn to face me again. Slowly as if to not frighten me with any sudden movement, he makes his way towards me while still keeping my gaze lock with his.

He settled himself onto the floor in front of us and waited for me to make a move first. I didn't notice that my body was gradually leaning forward closer towards the vampire as I let my curiosity take over and I let my hand trail across his face feeling smooth skin under my fingertips stopping at his lips where I could see a pair of fangs poke out from under those lips. I retracted my hand a little turning to face my adoptive father silently questioning him with my eyes weather it was safe.

"Go on ahead Sayuri…he won't hurt you like those other did.." his reassuring voice sooth my nerve and I once again turn my attention toward the vampire. Rising up to my full height which only reached the kneeling vampire chin, I slowly close what little distance there was between us until I was standing directly in front of him where our body was merely centimeters away. I kept my gaze down the whole time and only when the vampire in front of me calls out my name did I look at him.

"Sayuri…I'm please to finally meet you." The way he says my name make my inside flutter.

When I keep my lips shut he brush his hand lightly on my cheek causing a pink tinge to emerge under his finger. The corner of his lips rises a little in a shadow of a smile as he press for a reply from me.

"My name is Kaname…"

From the corner of my eyes I can see Otou-san beaming onto us. His eyes landed on me and he motion for me while waving his hand up his head to continue. Kaname seem to have notice the human odd behavior but he choose to ignore it knowing that the man can sometimes be odd and instead focus all his attention on the little girl in front of him.

I whisper my own reply hesitantly.

"…I'm Sayuri."

I raise my hand and held the hand stroking my cheek close sighing in contentment.

"…I know.."

lol sorry it took a while for this to come out.. so i hope it satisfied your taste bud haha hmmm what am i saying here??...

Note for my AKE NI SOMARU reader... i'm going to start writing the next chapter tonight so it'll probably be out in a couple of day...

See ya & thanks for reading...and the review too

THANKS