After I Break
A/N: I don't think I got my five reviews for the previous chapter, but here it is anyway. Enjoy and don't forget to review this time!
DISCLAIMER: GLEE? Nope, not mine. I'm just an obsessed freak who indulges in playing God from time to time.
Chapter 5: Lights Out
010101010
Blaine slumped down in his seat.
'This is not happening! Not Kurt!'
He buried his face deep in his hands as Finn went to try and call Rachel to see if Burt and Carole had been found. The intern, Dr. Watson, had just finished telling them about Kurt's condition.
Kurt needed brain surgery to remove the clotting in his head. And that would not even assure them that Kurt would be fine when he woke up.
If he did wake up.
'Fuck!' Blaine cursed himself. He had never felt so helpless as he did now. He wanted to cry, hurt himself or even die right then and there –but what good would that do? He failed. He had failed Kurt. By the time Blaine removed his head from his hands, his eyes met Finn's who was walking back towards him.
"Mom and Burt are on their way with Rachel,"
Blaine nodded, not knowing what to say to that. IN his honest opinion, the arrival of Mr. Mrs. Hummel would not do any change in Kurt's predicament anyway. Kurt was still fighting for dear life…
'Or is he?' A bitter voice at the back of Blaine's head cut into his reveries painfully. 'He had just tried to kill himself, not longer than 24 hours ago…'
Blaine shook his head as he forced the macabre thought away from his head.
'Kurt, if only I followed you home. If only I never stopped trying to call you and talk to you… if only I did not go with Sebastian… if only…'
"Hey Blaine, are you okay?"
Blaine woke up out of his stupor. Finn was eyeing him with a concerned look.
"Don't blame yourself, man," the tall senior tried to comfort him. "Kurt wouldn't want –"
"Who knows what Kurt would want?" Blaine spat out angrily all of a sudden. "Would you know what he would want, Finn?" He turned on the older boy. Finn sat quietly, obviously trying not to answer back and aggravate the situation.
"What? Cat got your tongue, Hudson?" Blaine stood up. "Of course you wouldn't. Nobody would know what Kurt wants! Did we ever even think of asking him? No!"
The waiting area was mercifully empty, except for them; Blaine's voice rang like a bullet through the dead silence of the night. Finn sighed heavily.
"Look, Blaine, I know there's something wrong, but you need to calm down –"
"CALM DOWN? Finn, are you even listening to yourself?" How can I "calm down" when my boyfriend is tethering on the brink of death? How can I fucking "calm down" knowing that he may never be the same boy that I loved? How can I "calm down" when the last time we saw each other, he was mad at me? How the heck can I –"
"Blaine –"
" –fucking "calm down" knowing that Kurt may n o longer want to live after all this shit?"
Silence.
Blaine took deep breaths as he tried to regain his normal breathing. He said it. Finally. Now, if only Finn would figure out what he meant…
"What –what do you mean –by that?" Finn's face was indescribable as he stared at the younger boy. Blaine scoffed.
"Not the brightest crayon in the box, are you?"
"Just answer the damned question, Anderson!" Finn moved threateningly towards the dark-haired junior. "Kurt is my brother –what do you mean he no longer wants to live?"
Blaine held Finn's gaze.
"Kurt tried to kill himself earlier today."
Finn pulled back.
"What?" He eyed the emergency OR doors then Blaine once more. "Is this some kind of a sick joke?"
Blaine bit his lip but did not say anything. Finn gaped at him.
"Good God, Blaine, I –"
"He warned me not to tell anybody," Blaine said, his voice, barely a whisper. He caught Finn's eye. "I knew it was wrong –I should have at least told you –but he threatened to do something drastic. He did not tell me what, but I knew he was going to hurt himself again if I did not do as he asked –"
"Wait, again?" Finn asked. "What –what did Kurt try to do?"
Blaine closed his eyes, trying hard to stop the tears from falling, as he forced himself to recall the horrible moments that he and Kurt shared in the boys' room. It was something he had vowed to lock away in the depths of his consciousness –an ugly old nightmare he certainly did not want to remember. With a deep breath, Blaine opened his eyes and searched for the tall senior's own.
"He tried to shoot himself."
010101010
Rachel was driving. She drove like her life depended on it. She was turning into a side street that would take her to the back entrance of Lima General. As she took one final turn, she glanced at the rearview mirror. A couple of pairs of eyes stared right back at her –eyes that were worried, frightened and uncertain.
She and Finn were having a wonderful, quiet evening when the call from Blaine came. Finn put the dark-haired junior on speaker. He sounded terrible. Finn immediately left after they have been briefed.
Kurt. Accident. Lima General. Now.
Five words were all it took.
Rachel took her favorite cashmere sweater and her car keys and drove to the outskirts of town to find Burt and Carole, who apparently had both their cell phones turned off. They were dining in a recently-opened fine dining restaurant, oblivious to the plight of one of their sons. Rachel approached the establishment warily. Her hair was a mess, and her clothes were certainly inappropriate, but she fought her way in.
Her eyes then landed on the sweet, unsuspecting couple who held hands. It was Carole who saw her first.
"Oh my, Rachel, what's the matter dear?"
Rachel froze on her spot. Burt turned around to look at her. Rachel held her breath.
Kurt. Accident. Lima General. Now.
Carole's hands flew up to her rouged lips as Burt hastily withdrew his wallet and unceremoniously dumped a wad of bills on the table –it looked too much for a dinner of steak and wine, but he did not care. Together, the three of them stormed out of the quiet restaurant and into the parking lot.
By the time they had reached it, Carole held Burt back before the man could even reach his car. She then proceeded to nod in Rachel's direction. The young brunette nodded right back.
"I'll drive,"
After what felt like forever, Rachel was maneuvering her car into the parking lot of Lima General Hospital. But before she could even kill the engine, Burt was already rushing towards the emergency bay, with a teary-eyed Carole following in his wake.
010101010
Burt reached the receiving desk in record time.
"Hummel! My son! How is my son –"
"Burt! A familiar voice called out from behind him. Burt turned to look.
"Finn! Oh God! What happened to Kurt? Tell me!" Is he okay? Is he –"
"Kurt –was in an accident. He – he was driving, he did not apparently see the light change as he crossed the intersection and –and –" After those phrases, Finn found out that he couldn't continue any longer. He looked around. His mom as coming up to them, with Rachel right behind her. Finn sighed as his girlfriend went up to him and gave his trembling hand a light squeeze. Finn turned his attention back to Burt. The man was clutching his chest, his face, pale as a ghost's.
"What –what is his condition now?"
Finn took a deep breath. He wished that Dr. Watson would come out of the EOR at that particular instant, but it was not to happen. The tall senior instead glanced at the other boy that stood silently by the EOR doors, who everyone seemed to have forgotten or not noticed that was there. Blaine had told him everything. But no matter what…
"The doctors are operating on him," Finn said, swallowing the bile that went up his throat. "Dr. Watson spoke to us; I'm not sure of the medical term, ham… hem…. Hemo –"
"Hemorrhage?" Rachel supplied helpfully. Finn nodded. Carole's hands flew up to her mouth once more. Burt buried his face in his hands in frustration. They stood in silence like that in silence for a couple of minutes –until the EOR doors swung open with a squeak.
"Hummel?"
It was Dr. Watson. Finn's head snapped up, as did Blaine's Both boys hurried up to the doctor, the rest of the family following them warily. Blaine held his breath as the light on the 'Emergency' sign above the EOR doors was turned off.
The operation was over.
Dr. Watson looked grim, The doctor cleared his throat loudly before delivering the news.
'Please, Kurt,' Blaine pleaded in his head. 'Please be okay,'
010101010
A/N: Dundundundun! So, will Kurt live? It's up to you people. I might finish this in the next chapter… depends if I get reviews and stuff… I did not get my 5 for the last chapter. Can I get 10 for this then? Pretty please? Thank you! -Eastwoodgirl