Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto

A/N: Hi all, finally here at last is the long-awaited lemon! I suppose taking 14 chapters and about 50 000 words to get there is a long enough wait :) Because I wanted to post this chapter today, I didn't take up LostsoulofRegret's kind offer to check it over (Thanks again!) but I really hope it's alright anyway. I won't babble on too much, because I'm looking forward to hearing what the response is (and nervous too!). Enjoy reading!

Note: The following chapter contains a lemon, so please don't read if it makes you uncomfortable (although some parts are pretty important to the plot – that's why it's rated 'M' after all).

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Chapter 14

Falling

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Anko watched Jiraiya and Naruto leave from the edges of the trees where she and Kabuto had first reached the little village. She was relieved that they weren't going to try and stop her or take her back, because she would have had to fight and not hold back. But she knew that Jiraiya would have to notify Konoha that he'd seen her. They'll probably send more ANBU.

"Interesting little run-in, Anko-san."

The voice came from behind her, but Anko didn't bother turning around. She continued to watch the bright yellow-headed boy disappear behind a corner at the far end of the village.

"Did you find him, Kabuto?" she asked at last, turning to see the spy watching her with an unreadable expression.

"Follow me. We should have few problems with his bodyguards."

They didn't have any problems. Between the two of them, Anko and Kabuto were skilled enough to deal with the guards silently and brutally. When they entered the room holding the man they were sent after, he clearly knew who Kabuto was.

"... Kabuto-san, what a surprise," he stuttered at last. The man was large, and his massive face went pale when he saw them enter. He attempted a smile that was more of a hideous grimace. "What brings you here? Can I offer anything that Sound requires? I am at your service as always."

Kabuto's smile was friendly, and fake. "I'm sure you know what happens when people cross Orochimaru-sama," he said quietly, "You can't think you would get away with anything, can you? It's just not the way Sound does business."

Anko left to stand at the doorway, watching for any guards that they'd missed. She stood still even with the muffled screams and horridly pathetic pleas for the medic to stop. The man, whose name she still didn't even know, gurgled and confessed anything and everything Kabuto required. She didn't flinch at the cracks and grinding noises as Kabuto made use of his medic skills to horrific purpose, carrying on even after he'd got what he wanted.

Instead, she fell into memories.

...o..o.o..o...

The knock at the door made her leap up from her chair. Are they back? she wondered excitedly. Are they home?

But the door swung open, and they weren't there. The shinobi standing where they should have been, his face grave, took her inside and shut the door firmly behind them. She couldn't help craning her neck to look at it swinging shut until the last sliver of view of outside disappeared.

He sat her down carefully, ignoring her confused questions.

"I'm sorry."

She was practising alone, like she always did. She was determined to become a kunoichi, no matter what the Hokage said.

"I'm going to be strong!" she cried, using all her effort to throw the kunai as hard as possible.

But a hand stopped their flight, all four. She stared in amazement at the tall man standing in the shadows of the tree she'd been aiming at. She would always remember his smile.

"Of course you are. I'm going help you."

The door swung shut, and she was in pain with twin points of fire in her neck, but the betrayal hurt the most of all. "I've always been in pain!" she'd told the Sandaime. Hadn't she? The pain of loneliness wasn't so different from the pain of loss or betrayal. They all hurt, they all stung.

Maybe she was better off feeling nothing.

...o..o.o..o...

It seemed like forever before the spy came up alongside her. He stopped to smile contentedly, wiping absently at the blood on his hands with a rag. "We've got what we wanted. Orochimaru-sama will be very pleased." He sighed, pulling off his glasses to wipe them as well. "I'll never understand why they seem to think they can outwit him. Everyone will learn soon enough what happens when they cross Sound. A few lessons may be necessary until then."

"You enjoy what you do, don't you." Anko made it more of a statement than a question. The deaths of the guards at her hands and at Kabuto's, and hearing him torture the leader to death, made her feel empty. If she looked in the mirror, she'd be surprised to see anything but a void reflected in her eyes. Even speaking was an effort, and trying to put emotion that she didn't feel into her words even to make them a question was impossible.

Kabuto smiled at her. "Of course. Don't you?"

Do I? Anko looked back through the doorway. The man was dead, of course, though death had probably come as a mercy. Broken bones, burns, ripped skin, stab wounds, fingers cleaved. Kabuto had made the most of his short time. This side of the doorway were more dead men. Guards with broken necks (those had been mostly hers) and others with no visible marks except for small punctures (Kabuto had used his medical scalpel). One had a kunai in his forehead.

Anko moved over and leant down, pulling the blade out with a sharp jerk. She wiped it clean on the man's clothes while Kabuto searched for the documents that they'd come for. He knew where to look – the dead man had told him everything, after all. Even though it hadn't saved him.

They left once he had them. There was nothing to stay for any more, though Kabuto had offered her a drink. She said she didn't need one. She thought she'd lied. Maybe a drink would have helped her feel something. Fill in the empty space where she should have felt the horror of what she'd seen ... what she'd done and who she'd done it for.

The two nin leapt from branch to branch high in the trees. Anko didn't feel like lingering on the way back, and upped their pace. She didn't know why she was rushing back, either. What was there to rush back to? It wasn't like when she'd been a special jonin of Konoha, with Kakashi waiting at home. No, it wasn't like that. She was a missing-nin, now, with Orochimaru waiting at the place she now lived. It wasn't home. Maybe she'd never had such a place. Maybe this void was all she'd ever had. Maybe everything else was a dream.

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Anko made straight for the place in Sound that served as their bar. She hadn't expected there to be one in the beginning, but logically it made sense. Even subordinates of insane criminals needed a place to relax and get drunk. Orochimaru had more male nin than female, and there were prostitutes available as well. It was a fact that she didn't find too charming – Do they really have to pay to get laid? How sad – but it wasn't unusual.

She settled heavily in a chair at the corner of the bar against the wall. It was the most private place there, and she'd claimed it as hers. The bartender knew her well enough to place a plate of dango and a bottle of sake on the bar in front of her without asking. He also knew her well enough not to comment when she downed the alcohol immediately and waved for more.

Anko tried to ignore the noise of the other people there. It was late in the day, and she hadn't even stopped for more than a cursory shower after arriving back. She couldn't face staying in her room, and needed to get drunk. She needed to feel something, to drown the void. Or numb it.

The kunoichi'd left Kabuto to make the report to Orochimaru. She couldn't even think of facing him right then. She needed a lot more to drink before she saw him anytime soon. He just took too much effort to deal with.

"When do you think Orochimaru-sama is going to make another move on Konoha?"

Anko turned a little. Two shinobi were talking just along the bar from her, and she could hear their conversation clearly.

"I'm not sure," the other replied, rubbing a scar on his cheek. "Maybe he's going to wait to make another alliance, or replace those we lost."

"Or wait for a younger skin," the man suggested, laughing crudely. "You've got to wonder how he wears them out so quickly."

"I could think of at least one way – with age comes experience, right?" scar-face agreed. His leer was almost wistful. "Damn, that's a great trick. Wish I could do it."

"Yeah, you've been having problems 'getting up' in the morning lately, haven't you?" the other man laughed raucously at his own innuendo.

Anko stopped listening to the exchanged insults. Konoha. She didn't miss the town, or many of the people. She missed the freedom she'd had, and the few people she counted as friends. They'd sit in a bar like this, laughing and talking and sharing stories or opinions. Sometimes she'd been weirder than usual, or more aggressive, but they'd never cared. Even when she'd been on the verge of killing Gai (which was often), or Genma when he pushed her too far, she'd enjoyed her time with them. They were good people. Maybe too good for someone like me.

Kakashi. She wondered what he'd think when he heard Naruto had seen her. She wondered briefly what he was doing, who was giving him what he needed to chase his demons away now she wasn't there (Just say it: who do you think he's fucking now?), but cut the thought off.

She was getting maudlin, and it annoyed her. The only answer was more sake to pass the point where she could think about the past. It wasn't making her feel more than empty, but she was sick of being hollow.

When Anko finally left the bar, she didn't stagger though by all rights she shouldn't have been able to walk. She had a high tolerance, but even for her she'd had a lot. Her lips had passed the feeling-numb stage long ago, and her mind saw everything through a foggy veil.

Maybe it was chance that she ended up standing in front of his door. Maybe it wasn't, but she was there. She hadn't been in his room, and she knew now was not the time, but her hand moved almost on its own to turn the handle and push the door slowly open.

He was sitting at his desk going through scrolls when she entered, despite the late hour. He looked up when she stepped inside, but didn't seem very surprised to see her.

She didn't know what to say, or even if she could bring herself to speak. Anko moved slowly towards a floor-length mirror on one wall, averting her eyes from his large luxurious bed at the end of the room. The lighting was dim, but bright enough for her to see her reflection.

The kunoichi stared at herself in the glass, and couldn't recognise who she was looking at. It was her, it must be, but she'd changed so much. The darker clothes made her look pale, washed out. Her hair needed a cut, and she was sleeker with more muscle. She was stronger than she'd ever been and it showed, but it was more than that.

There was something wrong with her eyes.

Orochimaru came up behind her, and slipped his arms around her waist. He looked over her shoulder into the mirror as well, and she couldn't suppress the shiver at the sight of the two of them together. She looked almost as pale as he did, and they were eerily similar. Their dark hair, pale skin. Their light, dead, slit-pupil eyes. What?!

"You didn't think you would have found a forbidden jutsu among the things I left behind in Konoha that I didn't know, did you?" he asked her softly, amused.

Anko's eyes were wide, her shock reflected in the mirror. "You? You did it as well?"

"Of course," he replied, pulling her more firmly against his body. "I was quite impressed with it myself, although there were side-effects I didn't expect."

Anko shook her head, trying to pull reason through the sake-haze clouding her thoughts. The heat of his body pressing against hers was the only thing that felt important to her, and the alcohol agreed strongly. "What ... side-effects?" she asked with difficulty.

His reflection smiled, and pulled the tie from her hair so that it fell in soft waves about her face. "Some physical changes, enhanced reflexes, as you have seen," the smile showed his sharp canines, a small movement of his hand indicated their eyes, "And some behavioural changes as well."

"What do you mean?" She tried to ignore the small movements of his hands on her waist, and the closeness of his lips to her skin.

"Heightened aggression, blood-lust, possessiveness, a certain lack of compassionate emotions ... of course, I can't say for certain whether that is just my own personality." his smile betrayed a degree of humour at the comment. "My tests on other subjects were unsuccessful."

"What happened to them, Orochimaru?" She was sobering up quickly, but not quickly enough. What have I become?

The Sannin shrugged, as if it were unimportant. "Some died. Most went insane." He met her eyes in the mirror. "And then there was you. You, who was the first to survive getting my seal. You, who was the first apprentice that I considered using as a future vessel. Did you know?" he asked, noticing her shock, "I could have taken you with me, to use as my first vessel. I hadn't perfected the technique when I left, but I knew I was close. I'd already trained you, gained your trust.

"I could have used you."

"So why didn't you?" her question was quiet. She wanted to know.

Orochimaru twisted her around so that she was looking directly in his eyes, away from the mirror. He stroked her cheek affectionately, possessively. "Because I knew you would be of some use to me later on. Because I wanted to see what you would become."

Anko turned away, trying to resist him. Kakashi. But he could read the word in her face, and pulled her back to look in his eyes again. "Do you really think he's still waiting for you, Anko?" he demanded, "Do you think he hasn't found someone else?"

Hadn't she been trying not to think those same thoughts? Did it even matter any more?

She was falling into the void in his eyes. He was pulling her in, and she couldn't hold back any more. She couldn't deny the lust she felt for him, or her desperate desire to feel. The alcohol took away her ability to rationalise why it was wrong, even in the face of his story that he'd used her all along and intended to continue to use her when she left him. Maybe if she hadn't been drunk she would have been able to resist. Maybe she wouldn't have resisted anyway.

He gave no sign of surprise when she pulled him in for a hungry kiss. His one hand buried in her hair, and the other fitted her hips against his.

Orochimaru allowed her a moment of dominance before asserting his own. He moved to her throat, with scrapes of his teeth creating lines of fire soothed by his lips. His mouth led a dance that left her aching, with her breath coming in short gasps. His fingers slipped under the lapels of her coat, sliding it over her shoulders and to the floor. The mesh underneath left little to the imagination.

Anko slid her own fingers between the folds of his robe, over the smooth skin and muscle beneath. She pushed it off of his shoulders, down his arms, so that it fell about his waist and was held only in place by a purple tie. The kunoichi ran her hands along the muscles of his arms, tracing the planes of his chest. When he bit her hard enough to draw blood, her nails dug into his arms and drew some of their own.

He picked her up, so her legs were wrapped around his waist, and walked carefully towards the bed. His lips were locked with hers again, in a ravaging, savage kiss. Orochimaru lay her down on her back, with her legs still around him, and moved his attention to removing her shirt. She twisted and pulled to help him, wanting to feel his skin against hers as quickly as she could.

The Sannin swept his tongue across her skin, as if he wanted to taste as much of her as possible. For the moment, Anko could only entwine her hands in his hair and writhe with the pleasure interspersed with the pain he administered as well.

"Did you know ..." she managed to murmur with difficulty, "that when I first had sex, I thought ... ah! ... about you ... the whole time?"

Orochimaru lifted his head, looking at her with unreadable gold eyes. "Really?" His voice was husky, and made her shudder at the feeling of his breath on her skin and at the sight of him lying against her bare chest.

"Yes. I ... I didn't want you to take the first of everything I had." Her laugh was bitter. "It was the only way I could spite you. The only form of rebellion I could think of. Sad, isn't it? Especially considering where we are now."

Orochimaru smirked. "Whether you are a virgin or not, I will enjoy this. And so will you." He pressed his hips against hers, and Anko groaned at the pressure where she ached most. He moved his lips against her ear, breathing the words in a dark, hungry voice: "Although ... I like the thought that you were thinking of me the first time you came."

Her lust clouded Anko's mind like a haze. She managed to pull enough thought together to flip him over, which he allowed, and lower her own head so she could use her lips and tongue to trace the paths her fingers had. Anko ground her hips against his, alternating smooth caresses with sharp scrapes of her nails and teeth that made him press up against her. She circled his nipple with her tongue, running her nails down his sides and giving back some of the pleasure/pain he'd given her. When she looked up to meet his eyes, with her mouth still on his skin, they met golden slits cloudy with lust of their own.

The Sannin pulled off the rest of her clothes, and flipped her over onto her back again. He spared a moment to sweep his eyes over her body, following the look with a caress that ran down the outside of her bare thigh. She tugged at his purple tie in disapproval of his few remaining clothes, and with a smirk he helped her remove them.

Orochimaru lowered his body down so it just pressed against hers, and he stopped her from writhing or arching up to take him in with a strong hand on her hips.

Anko moaned in protest and need, but the Sannin just smirked and waited until she was calm enough to meet his eyes. "What do you want me to do, Anko?" he asked, dark voice full of seductive temptation. He wanted her to fall from the precipice knowing exactly what he was going to do to her, and knowing that she had asked for it.

She pulled in her breath, going momentarily cold at the sight of Orochimaru leaning over her naked body. This was Orochimaru, with his cold gold eyes and calculating smile. It was Orochimaru lowering his lips to run his tongue over her breast. It was Orochimaru running teasing fingers across her inner thigh ... It was Orochimaru who pressed himself more firmly against her core, taunting her with her own lust.

What have I become?

But there was no room for thought. This was what she needed.

"I need you to take the emptiness away."

"What do you want me to do, Anko?"

This was what she wanted.

"I want you to fuck me, Orochimaru!" she demanded, angry but helpless to resist, arching herself against him so that his length slid inside to fill some of the void.

She was too caught up in the insanity of feeling to see his satisfied and triumphant smirk, before he gave her what she wanted. Need wasn't enough for her to feel – needs were almost unconscious, and she had to make a conscious decision. Want, being unable to deny it, led the true path to the sin he wanted her to commit.

The sin of betrayal of all she'd left behind.

Anko wrapped her legs around him while he pressed deep inside her, and closed her eyes at the intensity of her physical reaction to the man who'd taken her in as a child, and who had taken some of her loneliness away.

"Open your eyes," he told her immediately.

"What?" she gasped the words.

His smile was wicked. "I want to see in your eyes what I'm doing to you."

Anko kept her eyes open, because denying him anything right at that moment was beyond her. Her need, her want, was building up into an unbearable intensity of feeling that threatened to wash her away. The roughness of it, of his strength and pace, just made her ache more and raised the intensity higher.

"Oh, god, Orochimaru," she breathed sharply, "Don't stop!"

She was reaching a peak of feeling that hit her like a wave. She shuddered in its path, crying out and holding him tightly. Orochimaru lowered his head and buried his fangs in her neck, exactly where he had all those years ago. Anko jerked, the action causing that intense peak feeling to jump higher than she'd even felt. Her curse seal flared into activity, and the wave became a tidal-wave, the jump off the cliff became a leap off of the highest mountain that never ended. It held so long she thought that she was going to die, but finally she was falling. She was falling into the darkness, the void, that was Orochimaru.

And she never wanted to stop.

Orochimaru pulled back, removing his teeth from her skin and leaving behind two beads of crimson blood that he cleared with a sweep of his tongue. He rolled them over so that she was lying against his chest, and he held her close within the circle of his arms.

Anko sighed, satiated and exhausted, and curled against him. He smoothed her hair away from her forehead, and she stroked her hand lazily over his chest. She fell quickly into sleep, but Orochimaru remained awake for a few moments longer. He pulled a light sheet over them both, and caressed her bare waist and thigh leisurely.

Tonight he would let her sleep, but tomorrow ... He smirked when he thought about tomorrow, and beyond. He looked down at the little kunoichi, the little spitfire, the lover of the famous Copy Nin, who would be the downfall of Konoha. Hmm, and how I will enjoy the days until that final day comes, my little Anko. How many things I'm going to enjoy teaching you.

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A/N: Feedback would be greatly appreciated! Have a brilliant day :)