Disclaimer: I don't own and never will own the rights to anything Lord of the Rings. Crying shame.
A/N: We're approaching the end here (as logic would suggest). Thanks to my lone reviewer for last chapter, whose flattering compliments keep me going. I hope everyone enjoys.
Chapter 10: In Minas Tirith
At length, our company – Captains of the West and the Fellowship – knew that it must depart for Minas Tirith, for it had work there. On the first morning of May, ere the sun cast her first light over the eastern horizon, we were roused to depart to the City. Hundreds of different emotions, as it seemed, coursed through my mind at the thought of retuning home. I was elated, for one, to hear that my City still stood, and the warmest thoughts entered my mind as I anticipated retuning to the home I loved best. Yet, what would I find there upon arrival? Would sights of desolation and ruin greet my eyes, and how many homes and halls and towers would I find devastated?
Perhaps these worries that I felt in the very pit of my stomach were in actuality premonitions yet to be seen. As we neared the City, of which I had such fair memories, I saw that the very outer gates were in utter ruin, and upon beholding their splintered fragments, I wept openly. The great doors to the first gate we also found shattered.
It was here that Lord Faramir encountered us, and Elessar was crowned the formal Lord of the City; once again, Gondor had a King. For this reason I rejoiced in my heart, as I eagerly awaited the prospect of Minas Tirith being restored to its former glory.
Now Faramir was no longer my Lord, but rather King Elessar was, for the former Steward abdicated his ruling office upon arrival of the King. But he caught sight of me a last time soon after the coronation, and broad was his smile when he beheld me.
"I see you have returned triumphantly from the mission which you were assigned; though certainly if your trio had failed, we would not have had to await tidings of it. Yet, you have faithfully guided two Halflings through the most treacherous land in this Middle-earth, even as I knew you would, despite your past few demonstrations of stubbornness."
"Alas!" I cried. "I wish that I had been as faithful as you have alleged." And through gasps of regret, I recounted my hesitation, fleeing, and repentance on the Morgul Road, even to the one whom I had formerly served.
"So it passes at times. The greatest bouts of courage spring forth from the greatest bouts of fear. You repented of your wrongdoing and more than compensated by leading Frodo into the very heart of Orodruin itself. Yes, I have heard of your deeds. They, as well as Frodo's deeds, have been rumored far and wide within the City."
These words had good effect on me, and I departed with a somewhat lighter heart as we rode into the City. When we reached the third level, the company stopped in front of my own dwelling and tarried briefly to see me off. My state of relative ease soon proved to be transitory; it was replaced by a sense of horror when I saw that not even my own home had been spared from damage. A boulder had sailed through the portal, shattering the door and spreading its fragments abroad as seeds dispersed by wind. The doorway was now partially enlarged and its edges crude. Another offending stone had smitten the house above and crashed through my roof, and was actually lodged in the floor of my bedroom.
Quite finished with the inspection of my ruined abode, I exited and found that Frodo, Sam, and Gandalf still stood waiting; perhaps they had surveyed the damage as I had and had anticipated that I would emerge. I could look none of them in the face without fresh tears springing to my eyes.
"You may take leave of me," I informed them. "I am in mourning for Minas Tirith that once was so fair to my eyes, which had before that beheld no beauty. I remember first looking upon the proud towers white as ivory while they were yet undisturbed by the havoc of the enemy. I long for the day that it is fully restored, if I shall live to see it. But perhaps at least I might survive to see my own house renewed."
"I hope for your sake that good fortunes might provide for you that privilege," Gandalf spoke. "In the meantime, why will you not appeal to your King? Surely he would provide for you a temporary dwelling, even as he will do for Frodo and Sam, as a token of his gratitude."
Loth was I to make this request of my Lord, for I felt unworthy of the right to demand anything. Surely, Elessar would have deemed me worthy and thereby granted my request. But he knew only of my 'last great deed' and not my previous error, and surely, the latter would suffice to count me as shameful. I could not continue having all of my fellow city-men and King thinking that I was so honorable. So I appealed to King Elessar, not omitting my full confession of my transgression, so as to appease my conscience if only in the slightest. Gracious was the King when he saw me and heard my entire tale. He was moved to show me more compassion than I merited, even enough to offer me a dwelling in the his very guest halls, in the same place as Frodo and Sam.
The entire fellowship remained long in Minas Tirith, under request of the King, who was awaiting a sort of monumental day and wanted that his friends witness the event. When he was asked eagerly concerning this special day, he took to secrecy, and it was left for all to await.
In the meantime, I saw little of any members of the Fellowship. Frodo took to his bed often and said little to anyone save for Sam. But one day he was strolling about the city, and he caught sight of me while I was out of doors, deep in a pensive state.
"Tallah! Hello. I did not expect that I would find you here."
I started; so deep was I in the realms of thought that I had seen no sign of him, though he was close to me. But great was my joy when I beheld the face of the one who had woken me out of my reverie. I was just as surprised to note that, on this particular occasion, he was unaccompanied.
"Why Frodo! No more did I foresee this chance meeting. But what brings you here?"
"Leisure, and a desire to escape the confines of the bed. I have just started to walk about."
"Take pleasure in it! I am certain that you shall. This is the perfect season to enjoy the City and the gardens, and the majesty of Mindolluin to the South."
"Still more would I enjoy the company of one who knows the City and its gardens best." He extended a hand to me, and I took it and rose, smiling.
"Though it be twenty years before I desist, I shall not tire of being your guide."
To this, I received no answer save a soft smile from Frodo, but this was not the effect of merriment; rather, it was a sad sort of smile issued in the place of words, and as I looked at his silent face and sad eyes, my joy grew dim. So we walked on in an utter silence that was uncomfortable for both of us, and I longed to interrupt it with an inquiry as to why he had responded thus. But I refrained from the temptation for fear that I might somehow unknowingly offend my friend, or encroach upon his privacy. Then silence hovered over us, becoming increasingly severe as it proceeded.
Soon enough, we reached the gardens of the Courtyard of Stone, and our silence transformed into one of wonder. I blessed the moment when Frodo spoke.
"Who might have guessed that such beauty could exist here? I might have taken these gardens as a vision of my homeland. But tell me how you know of this place? It is isolated by the highest levels of the City, which are reserved for the noble."
"Have you not noted that I was once in the service of Captain Faramir? It is not so anymore, and it was not always so.
"When I came to this City, I much desired to dwell herein. This, however, caused a ripple of indignation among the Big People, and the disturbance reached even the ears of the Seward Denethor. He called me before him and looked on me with a sense of scorn. Yet, he saw it as an occasion to make us of me.
'If you desire above all else to dwell in this City, then you must work to render a great service to it. In doing so, you will prove your worth to its citizens.'
"He then inquired about my skills, to place my area of service. I then related to him my wanderings in the wilderness.
'I am not learned in knowledge bestowed by books. Perhaps you consider this equal to being completely incompetent. But are books the only medium for obtaining knowledge? I have wandered twenty and five years in the lands of this Middle Earth and several roaming throughout Gondor alone. Does that not make me learned, in some fashion, about the lands around me?'
"Then Denethor, though still he looked at me with contempt, said: 'You shall serve the Steward of Gondor with this knowledge. You shall serve as a scout for our army, seeing as you have more precise wisdom about distant lands than even a map can show. Undoubtedly, you have wisdom concerning good high grounds, and you must also know how to stealthily spy upon an amassing enemy. You shall also serve as a messenger as our men are otherwise engaged.'
"This was an order, and my duty. Yet, even if I had a choice, I would not have done otherwise. To me, it was a small duty, not even worthy of being named a sacrifice, if only it would allow me to live in this fair place.
"Several years passed as I scouted Gondor's borders, and I got along happily enough, though there was no friendship between the Steward and me. But after a period, his arrogance went to his head and he paid little heed to my reports. A great fire was ever present in his eyes, and his air turned to that of a madman. And though often I would say to him that the forces of Morgul amassed on Mordor's Western border, still he refused to engage his men there. And then, alas I erred. The incident on Morgul Road was not near the first time I had done wrong in my life. I spoke out against Lord Denethor.
'Ever has Minas Morgul been at war with our City, and now Orcs amass anew near its borders. Will you not send men there while they still gather force?'
"And the wrath of Denethor burned against me, and his eyes seemed to grow even hotter with flame, and he said:
'Who is the defender of this City? And to whom has the fate of this land's people been entrusted? To Tallah Underhill, who arrived hither as a nomadic refugee, poor and destitute, or to Denethor son of Ecthelion, Lord and Steward of Gondor?'
"To this I could give no answer, and none was needed. But I was no less stubborn. I would not work in his service if he discredited me in such a way. My obstinacy was as grievous a fault as Denethor's pride. Very nearly did he dishonorably discharge me from his service and the City. He would have done so if Faramir had not had compassion upon me. He moved to persuade his father to allow me to serve directly under him. This request did not please Denethor, but after some pleading, he relented in my favor. And because of this, Faramir found a loyal servant in me. Such is my tale; and together with its previous counterpart, you now know it in full."
"I know you have mourned your faults, and above all, your obstinacy. And yet I shudder to think what would have come to pass if you had not been so stubborn in Mount Doom." Indeed the next moment, I saw a shudder course throughout his body, and I looked at him with much pity in my eyes.
"Do not think of your past burden. It is over! That ought to be a glorious thought."
"Yes, it is no more. For that I am grateful at least." He turned from me, and by the sad intonation in his voice, I detected that he kept silent about some aspect of his former burden. There was nothing that I wanted more in those moments than to reach out and console him. What could be troubling him? I could not fathom it, and I became lost in the realms of supposition as I searched for the answer, but to no avail.
"Today is not a day to mourn; rather, let us rejoice. A mere few weeks ago, we have all begun life anew, and we shall live long in peace and prosperity."
Once again, Frodo glanced at me with a sad look in his eyes, and still I tried to guess at what all of this meant.
The Fellowship lingered yet in my City, though I saw none of its members, until at last the King's long-awaited day arrived. It was midyear's day, and a dozen or so High Elves arrived from Rivendell and Lothlórien, among whom was Elessar's bride, Arwen Undómiel, evenstar of her people and fairest of them all. And all rejoiced, and Elessar and Arwen were wed even on that very day.
Then I knew that the time was at hand for the Fellowship to depart, and I wept when I thought that I would never see any of them again, especially those whom I had grown to love most. But before they departed, Frodo called me to visit him, and my spirits rose when I listened to his words.
"As you know, we will depart soon. But this shall not be tour last meeting. I do not want it so. You have become almost as dear to me as those whom I have loved for years. Save for you, I could not have done my task." Here he paused to clutch a pendant, which I had not before noted, that hung around his neck. It was an intricate piece, crafted seemingly with the delicacy of the Elves. From it, he seemed to draw a certain sense of comfort, stamina to continue, and I wondered at the meaning of this, but did not inquire about it. "I would feel incomplete if we parted finally here, and I hope that you will visit me often as I dwell in the Shire."
How was I to respond to such a flattering plea that was so tenderly made by one I loved? Yet, at the same time, how could I so rashly arise and walk away from Minas Tirith, for the sake of which I braved, fire, ash, and the most treacherous territory in Middle-earth? At once, I felt as if I were being torn in two, my love for Frodo tugging one way, and my love for the City in the other.
"Minas Tirith lies so many thousands of leagues from your homeland. In order for me to do as you wish, I would be obligated to quit the City permanently. But do not despair; I am not refusing. I love you, Frodo, just as you have loved me, and perhaps to a greater extent. Were I asked now to leave this place for any other reason, I would utterly refuse. Yet, for your sake, I will consider accompanying you on your journey homewards.
"For so many years I have dwelt here and have had a heart of stone. But I feel now that it has melted, for sake of those that I now love."
"I am glad that you have learned to love, dear Tallah. You are not obligated to accompany me back to the Shire, though I would greatly desire it."
"I do not think it would do well for me to live in the Shire itself, or even to step foot in it. There is an ordinance that Big People are never to pass into its borders, and I am half-human. But I shall come to live close to it, if I so decide. Perhaps I will even choose to inhabit Bree, the land of my birth, though in that land I never found joy."