Chapter 11: Ghosts from the Past
Arizona walks into the room and the sight of Callie brings tears to her eyes. She has a ET tube from her mouth, and a ventilator to her left supporting her breathing. Multiple IV lines are hooked up to 3 pumps. Her leg and arm is bandaged with pins and rods jutting out. A large bandage covers her right cheek. She looks pale, and fragile, nothing like my strong, passionate lover. Arizona moves to her left side, grabbing her hand and sitting in the chair next to her. For hours she just sits, rubbing gentle circles into Callie's palm, whispering of her love and admiration. Soon she drifts off to sleep.
Callie looks around, distressed at not knowing her surroundings. She remembers something about a collapse and Mark yelling at her. Really the only thing that she can remember is Arizona. Those beautiful blue oceans, and that perfect dimpled smile. Turning around she is jolted to a stop. Standing before her is a sight she knows is impossible. It can't be him, she knows because she was there, she saw the coffin lowered, heard the bagpipes playing. George O'Malley can not be standing in front of her. If he is then that means only one thing, that she has died. No she couldn't of died, she refuses to leave Arizona. She doesn't understand what is happening. She tries to speak to George but he smiles and waves for her to follow him. Callie walks and suddenly she is back at the scene, on the day George died. He motions for her to come closer, and as she does, the days following play out like a movie scene in front of her.
How can you see into my eyes like open doors?
Leading you down into my core where I've become so numb Without a soul, my spirit sleeping somewhere cold Until you find it there and lead it back home
Callie's POV July 4th
"What the hell!" I shouted as I turned over my shoulder to see the building crumble to the ground. Fire and smoke push out and screams of people fill the air. I rush over to Chief Webber and listen as he begining to take accountability.
"Attention all personnel on the fire ground, we have had a collapse, with 7 firefighters trapped and 3 little girls missing. I want all personnel not directly involved with the rescue operations to cease and form a manpower pool behind 2315."
I find Sloan, and Karev and we immediately go to the remains of the building. Listening while I move a large section of debris and there is a hand. I yell we found them. As we work, the pace is fast but steady and efficient. We recover 4 of the 7 men missing. They are all en-route to the hospital when Capt Sheppard comes over to me.
"Torres, I need to tell you something."
I see that his face is full of concern and sadness. Well everyone's face right now looks the same. Then he tells me that George is one of the 3 guys still missing. My mind is flooded with emotion. I begin to feel the tears fall down my cheeks, I turn to frantically search for him. After 2 hours, their bodies are found. The 3 firefighters are brought out, their bodies in a stokes basket, covered in the American Flag. Every single person on the scene stops and forms a human chain. As George is brought out, I help carry him to the ambulance. I ride with him in the back to the hospital. As we pull up, some of the ED staff are waiting outside including Arizona.
They open the back doors and I climb down. The staff take over and wheel George into one of the rooms. People are talking to me, but all I'm looking for is one face. I see her, those eyes streaked with dried tears. I didn't even think to call her to tell her I was ok. I was to consumed with finding the guys. She rushes over to me and throws her arms around my neck, pulling me close to her. I kiss her with everything I have, pouring all my emotions into the kiss. We finally pull back from each other, leaning our foreheads together.
The next 4 days are a blur. Getting things set for George's funeral. George's mother requested that I handle all the arrangements for his memorial and burial. The other firefighters service were yesterday. Arizona refused to attend both with me, but agreed to go today. I haven't really had time to see or talk to her about anything due to the amount of work it takes to plan a full honors firefighter funeral. I was putting my uniform back on when I feel Arizona wrap her arms around my waist.
"Calliope, you haven't said much, are you ok?" She is looking at me from the mirror.
"I'm ok, just trying to get through this. George and I didn't have a great marriage, but I still loved him. He was a great guy. I already miss him."
I feel myself getting upset and I pull away from Arizona and grab my tie. Clipping it into place, I put my jacket on, checking myself in the mirror on last time, I give Arizona a kiss on the cheek and leave. I just can't deal with questions right now from her.
We get to the church and I'm in formation next to Mark. The preacher is going through his sermon. I'm standing there with no emotion at all. Like a robot on autopilot. The procession to the cemetary is huge and long. By the time we are about to lower his casket off the engine, something catches my eye. I see a blonde streak from the corner of my eye. As I look over, I see Arizona running away towards the car. As I carry George to his final resting place, my thoughts are of Arizona leaving. Doesn't she know how hard this is for me. I needed her to be here and she left. I'm so pissed at her. The service concludes with the ringing of the bell for George's final alarm, and the bagpipes playing Amazing Grace.
George begins to speak to Callie. "Callie, don't you realize why she left?"
"No, after that she kind of became distant to me. I was very angry with her. We started fighting a lot. Arguing about my job, and not loving her enough, things like that." I say looking at the blonde running away.
We follow Arizona back to her car, and I see that she is crying, like, really crying and my heart is filled with longing to wrap my arms around her and comfort her. She picks up her phone and calls someone. As soon as she hears someone pick up on the other line she begins to ramble on about flags and coffins and something about not living through it again. Then I hear her day his name, the name she only spoke once, during a brief getting to know you date. Danny. The realization just hits me, she had to watch her brother come home from Iraq in a coffin. A flag draped coffin, with full honors.
"See Callie, she was scared of losing another person she loved like that. My funeral brought all of those memories back for her. She wanted to be there for you, but didn't know how to deal with all the emotions left unresolved after her brother." George explains.
"Why didn't she ever say anything? We could have talked about it, she is my person, my life. I can't live without her. My life was incomplete before her. Like a piece of a puzzle that was missing. I gotta go George, take me back to her." I'm yelling at him, but he grabs my hand and turns me around to see myself lying in a hospital bed. I'm on a ventilator and Arizona is there, she is talking to me, but I can't make out what she is saying.
"Callie, only you can decide to go back, and Arizona is the key. Follow her voice, let her lead you home. You've always been the strong one Callie but you can't do it without her." George smiles and hugs me.
"George, you know I love you right? But I need to go."
Wake me up (Bid my blood to run)
I can't wake up (Before I come undone)
Save me (Save me from the nothing I've become)
(Bring Me to Life-Evanescence)