I don't own supernatural.
I LOVE THIS CHAPTER! I don't know why; maybe because I really like humor and this chapter had quite a bit of it.
Chapter 4 Medical Expertise and the Truth about Jobs
John didn't even seem to notice the rest of the family sitting stunned as he barked out orders. "Dean; the medical kit. Caleb; towels and stuff. Sam, stop squirming for Gods sakes!" he yelled.
"I'm fine. I can walk by myself," Sam complained.
"Oh my God," Rose interrupted before John could answer. "I'll call an ambulance."
"NO!" all four hunters yelled at once, momentarily freezing in place. Caleb had just returned with towels, Dean with a giant first aid kit, and John was trying to help Sam onto the last remaining couch while said little boy tried to wiggle out of his father's hold when they froze, so they looked a little comical. Well, they would've if it hadn't been for the blood covering Sam.
"What?" Calen asked, shocked. It was clear that Sam needed medical attention, and (if the way John was holding his arm was any indication) John needed some too.
"No hospital. Hospitals are a hunter's worst nightmare," John answered distractedly as the action restarted and he pulled Sam's shirt over his head. He grabbed a towel to sponge the blood off his son's back and upper right arm.
"Especially John's," Caleb put in as Dean took the towel from John. "What do you think CPS would say if they saw all the scars?"
The rest of the family was stunned speechless as Dean shoved his father gently out of his way with instructions to take care of himself.
John did just that, inspecting his arm for a good few minutes, trying to decide if it was broken or not.
"I popped the stitches on my back," Sam informed Dean.
Dean swore awfully before moving around his little brother to sit down behind him. The older boy continued swearing under his breath as he rummaged through the kit.
Dean came up with a medical needle and dental floss, and got to work repairing the stitches; disinfecting as he went.
Sam also grabbed a needle, thread, and more disinfectant from the seemingly endless medical box, and set to work preparing his arm for stitching.
Caleb gently pulled the needle from the small boy, winning much protest at the same time.
"I can do it," Sam insisted.
"I'm sure you can," Caleb replied calmly. "And I will allow you to do so when I have to put a cast on your idiot father's arm."
John snorted. "Watch who you're calling an idiot," he warned. "I'm not the one who learned to put in stitches from a nine year old."
"Well excuuuuuuuuse me," Caleb snorted. "I didn't have a freak father who insisted on me learning how to sew myself up when I was eight years old like Sam does."
"I take great pleasure in being a freak, thank you very much," John proclaimed with dignity. He pulled his arm in just the right direction, and there was a small click as the bone snapped back into place.
"Looks like it's your turn Little Bit," Caleb told Sam, holding out the needle.
"Finally," Sam exaggerated. "You sew like an old lady Cales."
"You know, if you weren't currently indisposed I would have made you pay for that comment," Caleb interjected causally.
"Of course," Sam assured. "That's why I'm saying it now while I can get away with it."
"Brat," Caleb remarked, flipping Sam the finger.
"Floozy," Sam retorted.
"Oh, getting dirty, are we?" Caleb teased.
"You think that's dirty, I could tell you a few of the things Dean and I throw at each other. They would probably make your nonexistent hair curl."
"Now that was just low," Caleb said.
"And Sam wins again. That's, what, 356 to 4, Caleb?" John asked with a raised eyebrow.
"The kid lives with you and Dean," Caleb protested as he wound the plaster around John's arm, "what do you expect? Your children play a game that consists of thinking up a new insult to go along with each letter of the alphabet; the loser is the first one to fail to come up with a derogatory term. That isn't normal, John."
"Who ever said I wanted normal kids?" John asked, sounding insulted.
At this point Dean broke into the banter with a loud and triumphant, "Done!"
Everyone turned to look at him. "What?" he asked. "Do know how difficult it is to sew up someone's back? Next time I call doing his arm."
"You're such a crybaby," Sam muttered.
"Hey, at least I'm not a bitch," Dean shot back, holding his hands up to prove his innocence.
"No, you're just a jerk," Sam quipped.
"As much as I hate to interrupt the fun you seem to be having throwing insults at each other, the rest of the family would still love an explanation," their grandfather broke in.
"Oh, yeah, I forgot," Caleb answered, blinking as he took in the whole family watching him like he was an alien. "The lie I was constructing is going to be completely pointless now, isn't it?" he sighed as he realized this fact.
"Excuse me?" his father asked, voice even more stern then it had been earlier.
"Well you wouldn't have believed me if I waltzed in one day and proclaimed monster were real and one of them killed my girlfriend," Caleb answered in exasperation. "I wanted to stay out of any mental hospitals, thank you."
"Let's start at the beginning, which, if I'm not mistaken, lies with John," Calen cut in before things could escalate. He focused his attention on his baby brother.
"You all know I married a woman named Mary, correct?" John inquired.
"Most of us were at the wedding," Opal affirmed, nodding as she did.
"Well, on the day Sam was six months old everything was normal at first. I went to work, came home to Mary and the kids happy trying to teach Sam to crawl in the living room. We ate dinner, and then I fell asleep watching the TV downstairs."
"You have such a bad habit of doing that," Mark snorted. "I remember when you were younger and Mom couldn't get you to sleep she sit you in front of the TV and you'd be out in seconds," he finished with a fond smile.
"I'll have to remember that," Dean muttered under his breath.
John ignored them all. "I woke up in the middle of the night to Mary screaming. I was up the stairs and in Sam's room in less then three seconds, but I was too late."
"I didn't see anything at first. Sam was in his crib, nothing was out of place. Then something dripped onto my hand. I looked up, and Mary was there, on the ceiling, with her stomach cut open. Then there was fire everywhere. I grabbed Sam from his crib and gave him to Dean. Told Dean to-"
"Take your brother outside as fast as you can. Don't look back," Dean finished in a whisper.
"Yeah," John confirmed, looking a little surprised. "And from there it all just kind of snowballed. I met a woman named Missouri who told me about the supernatural, and we were on the road for out first hunt by the time Dean's birthday rolled around."
"Been doing the same thing ever since. We look through the papers for odds deaths, or things of that type and when we find one we check it out. Sam and Dean have been hunting since they were eight."
"Eight!" Danny asked in horror. "John, you have to be kidding us," he pleaded. "We just saw how dangerous it can get."
"I love hunting," Dean cut in dreamily. "It's the best job in the world."
"…We can move back to that later then," his grandfather decided after a short bemused pause. "What about you, Caleb?" Hadrian asked.
"Well….." Caleb trailed into abashed silence. "You know how I kind of told you I'm currently living with my out of town girlfriend who works a lot and that's why you never see her?" he finally asked.
Dean snorted. "Sounds more like Sam's type then yours," he jested.
This earned him a slap from Sam and a look from Caleb. "What excuse would you have used then?" Caleb challenged.
"I would've played dead like Dad," Dean answered promptly. "No one's looking for you or nagging you if they think you're dead."
Caleb rolled his eyes. "Next time I need an excuse for my long absenteeism I'll remember that," he taunted sarcastically.
"Dude, you lost me at absenteeism," Dean responded carelessly. "My tired brain doesn't even know what that means."
"Basically means absent," Sam threw in.
"Back on topic, if you please," Luke cut in.
Caleb turned to his father with a nervous look on his face. "Um…..my-my girlfriend died years ago. Right after you first met her, actually. There was this ghost-"
"Ghost?" Brian cut in fearfully.
"Yeah," Caleb confirmed sadly. "It was going after couples, but Amy and I didn't know that. We got the house cheep since no one else wanted it. They were all afraid they were going to be next. Turns out Amy and I were."
"It was just a normal night when it happened, actually. We were," Caleb went scarlet. "We were actually in bed," he went even redder, "when it happened. One minute we were in the middle of, how to put this?"
"Assuring each other of your love," Sam suggested, looking sympathetic for Caleb.
"You could just say f-" that was as far as Dean got before John threw a hand over his mouth.
"There are children in the vicinity," he reminded, motioning towards where Brian was watching the scene with wide eyes.
"So?" Dean asked.
"You know, sometimes I wonder about my decision to let you help raise your brother," John thought aloud.
Sam saw quite a few people doing double takes at that one, but Caleb continued before anyone could intervene.
"Anyway," Caleb interrupted loudly. "One second we were in the middle of something, and the next she was dead with this creepy teenage girl standing there with a knife in her hand." Caleb shuddered. "She was coming towards me when-"
"When we interrupted in all our awesomeness!" Dean cut in.
"…Not what I was going to say, but that works anyway," Caleb deliberated. "She managed to slash me up pretty good before you got there though."
"And you wouldn't go to the damn hospital until we had salted and burned the bitch," John remembered with a scowl.
"You actually thought I was just going to go around wondering if she was going to shred my night life again?" Caleb asked incredulously.
"Everyone else does!" John cried.
"That just goes to show you that Winchesters, no matter what name they're currently taking, are stubborn bastards who don't know what's good for them. At least, the hunters are…..Actually, screw that, the whole family is stubborn," Caleb finished.
"What do you mean, 'salted and burned'?" Opal asked. She didn't really seem too keen on her "little" brother being anywhere near fire.
"You get rid of ghosts with salt, but they normally have something tying them to the living plain," Sam explained. "In most cases it's their bones, but it can really be anything that carries their DNA. You have to get rid of what ever's tying them to earth before they can move on. To do that you pour salt all over it, and then burn it."
"But you said most of the time it's their bones," Aiden objected.
"Yeah; so?" Dean asked.
"How are you supposed to burn their bones?" Hayden asked.
"I'll be right back," Dean left the room, entering seconds later with the weapons bag.
He unzipped the bag and pulled out a shovel. Sam and Caleb snickered, knowing where this was going. Dean had done the same thing to Caleb.
"This," Dean began, holding out the shovel, "is a shovel. You use it to move dirt."
"I know what a shovel is," Hayden objected in surprise. "I don't see why it's relevant though."
"To get rid of most ghosts you dig up their grave and burn theirs bones," Caleb clarified, taking pity on his younger cousin.
"That's disgusting," Jacklyn squealed. She didn't seem like the girly type (not in the bag jeans and band t-shirt she was wearing) but she sure sounded like a pretty little princess at that moment.
"Tell me about it," John groaned, leaning back in his chair and closing his eyes. He had gotten Sam and Dean up it four in the morning to get to this town today. He hadn't been expecting a hunt this soon.
Sam and Dean both caught their father's mood. Sam yawned and leaned against Dean while his older brother sleepily pulled him closer.
"What time did you get them up, John?" Caleb asked with a nod at Sam and Dean.
"Uh, about four, I think," he replied.
"Four!" Hadrian exploded. "What were you thinking, John! Sam isn't even finished growing yet; he needs his sleep!"'
"I was thinking that people were dying in the town next to this one, and I wasn't going to let more die because we were too lazy to get our butts out of bed," John answered with steel in his voice.
"Don't try to talk him out of it," Caleb advised. "It never works. Just give him this quietly disapproving look and hope he gets the hint some day."
"What happens if I ignore the hint?" John asked, obviously amused.
"Then we just give you more hints. It would be a lot better for all parties if you would just give in, John," Caleb retorted.
"Well the remainder of this talk can be saved for tomorrow. I think every one could use an early night," Hannah Winchester decided.
"Yes mother," her five sons coursed, gathering up their own various children.
John moved to shake his sons back to wakefulness, but was stopped by Calen. His older brother gave him a disapproving look, and gathered Dean into his arms.
John was too late to tell his big brother that that was a bad idea, so he just held his breath as Dean suddenly went stiff.
Calen stopped moving for a second as Dean cracked his eyes open to see what was going on.
"You drop me, and they'll never find the body," he muttered faintly. He then snuggled closer into his uncle's arms and went back to sleep.
John's jaw dropped as he stared at his oldest boy. Calen gave him a smug look and continued on up the stairs.
John blinked a couple times, then gathered his youngest in his arms and followed his oldest brother.
Once they entered the room John and Calen both set down their precious burdens on the bed. John hesitated for a few seconds, then started undressing his sons.
He stripped them both down to boxers and then pulled a fresh t-shirt over their heads. Both of them were too tired to do anything but allow their father to dress them like toddlers. It was getting close to summer, so John didn't bother with any pants.
As soon as he allowed them to sleep again Sam curled into his older brother's arms. Dean threw an arm around his baby brother, and they both settled in for the night. They looked a lot younger like that.
John sent one last worried look towards his son, and the followed his own big brother out of the room.
"They never sleep like that," he informed Calen. "Normally if you do much as touch Dean he's up and rearing to go."
"They're fine, John. You did get them up at four in the morning," Calen assured him.
"I always get them up at four," John dismissed this as of no consequence.
"Jonny!" Calen scolded in shock.
John had the good sense to look somewhat abashed.
"Your boys will be fine with a few good nights of sleep and some home cooked food. Truth be told you could probably use the same," Calen stated firmly as he pushed John into his room.
John sighed and went around gathering his things. His room was still decorated the same as it had been all those years ago when he left. Sports posters decorated the walls and his bed was covered in a dark blue comforter.
He started to undress, then noticed that his brother was still standing in the open doorway.
"Uh, Calen?" he asked.
"Hmm?" his brother responded.
"Do you need something?" John inquired.
"Nope," Calen answered.
"Oh," John said. "Then why are you, um," John didn't want to be rude and ask why his big brother was still there, but he also didn't want to change with the door wide open. "You're holding the door open," he settled on.
"Oh!" Calen flushed and moved into the room before closing the door behind him.
John didn't know why Calen was in his room, but decided to ask later. He proceeded to get changed, not caring in the least that his brother was watching him. John Winchester was not a modest man.
"You sure you don't need anything?" he asked when Calen was still there after he finished changing.
"Just making sure you get to bed," Calen answered.
John stared at the older man incredulously. "I'm not six Calen," he protested.
"Hate to tell you, Jonny, but you'll always be my baby brother," Calen smirked at him. "I was twenty when you were born; I was plenty old enough to be your father by that time."
John rolled his eyes, having heard this line of reasoning many times before. Hell, he had heard this type of reasoning from Dean concerning Sam. Though Dean was only four years older then Sam.
"Whatever Calen. I'm too tired to argue with you tonight," John groaned as he rolled into his bed.
"Go to sleep, baby brother," Calen ordered as he pushed the hair away from John's forehead. Lord it was odd to have his older brothers back. If anyone else had tried that, they would've had their hand broken faster'n you can say "what?"
"We can talk more tomorrow," Calen added a little more sternly.
John was too tired to feel any more then sleepy dread. He simply rolled over and fell into the waiting embrace of Morpheus.
Calen stood and watched him for a few more seconds until their father entered the room.
"He's fine, Calen," Hadrian assured him. "He'll still be here in the morning. You can give him the lecture of his life and ground his ass to the house if you want to. For now you need sleep as much as he does. It's been a long day."
Calen yawned, silently agreeing with his father. He left the room with no more protest, leaving behind only a kiss on his baby brother's forehead.
John was already sleeping and would never know, but Calen, Mark, Luke, and Danny had their baby brother back. John better be ready for some coddling.
Gasp! John let his brother actually touch him! For some random reason I really like Calen. More then any of the others, actually.
Is something actually wrong with Sam and Dean?
For anyone who didn't know, a floozy is a girl or woman who sleeps around.