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Chapter Eighteen: Lily

Early March 2013

Washington DC

A few hours after delivering Emily ran her finger down her daughter's small arm through the incubator. The tubes and needles didn't scare her but the fragile size of the baby did. 4 pounds 3 ounces and just at 18 inches long her daughter looked even smaller then she thought she would. Emily felt guilty that her body did this to her sweet girl but at the same time she was thankful to the doctors who were working nonstop to help.

The baby's hand flinched slightly bringing the first smile to Emily's tear stained face since being told she had to deliver her baby today. "I'm here sweet girl." She whispered watching in awe as her tiny eyes opened. "Do you think I should name you already?" she laughed softly. Taking in her daughter's face Emily smiled "I hope you like Lily. It was your great grandmother's name."

"Ms. Prentiss, I'm Doctor Amanda Holder. I'm taking over your daughter's care." the red head introduced herself.

"Nice to meet you. How is she doing?" she looked from doctor to baby and back again.

"She's strong but she needs a little help breathing so we have her on a ventilator. In a day or so if she starts breathing over it we will take it off. Now at the moment she doesn't have any infections which is very good but at the same time she can't nurse or drink from a bottle due to the ventilator so this tube here" she points to the tube in the baby's nose. "Is a feeding tube. I believe the nurses have already had you pumping so we can give her breast milk."

"Yes, they told me about the feeding tube. When the ventilator comes off and she is breathing well will I be able to nurse her?" Emily asked wanting to give her daughter the best she could and she knew breast feeding would not only give her the nutrition she needed but the bond a mother and baby share.

"Yes, though with her being born this young it might take her longer to grasp the concept of sucking so we will let you as often as she will do it but also keep the feeding tube to give her more. Now I don't want to lie to you and say she's going to be completely fine but she is doing very well considering." She explained.

Emily smiled weakly and nodded. "When can I hold her?" Just touching her baby and seeing the monitors showing she's alive helped but as she watched other parents taking their babies out and holding them she wanted that desperately.

"We do encourage kangaroo care but right now she is still very sensitive to all the machines so I would like to wait but I promise as soon as I can I will let you hold her."

After getting pushed back into her room Emily asked everyone to leave except Rossi. "I need you to get Hotch back." She said not wasting any time.

"I can't promise I can get through but I will try." He told her pulling out his cell.

"I need him Dave."

-CM-CM-

Afghanistan

"Hotchner" Aaron answered his cell wiping the sweat off his forehead.

"Aaron, its Dave." The familiar voice said over the phone. Hotch's brows shot up in surprise, a pleasant surprise but a surprise nonetheless. He hadn't heard from anyone since he left home except Jack.

"Dave, it's good to hear from you." Hotch said to his friend while walking away from base and all the noise from his rowdy team.

"You too Aaron but I'm afraid I need to tell you something that you're not going to like." his voice sounded rough and stressed.

He stopped in his place "What's wrong? Is it Jack? Emily?"

"Aaron, stay calm. Jack is fine. But Emily went into preterm labor today. The baby was under some stress so they got her out. She was born a few hours ago. She is very small just over 4 pounds but she's strong. She is in the NICU though."

Hotch's world seemed to end right there. As Rossi rattled off more and more information all he could see was Emily scared and alone in a hospital and her baby fighting for her life and neither of them had him. "Emily? How's Emily?" he asked.

"S-she's doing well. She's resting. They had to do a cesarean section so she's sore but they just brought her back from seeing the baby. She is only allowed a few minutes at a time so she can recover as well."

"Why didn't you call earlier? I would've been there!" he spun on his heel and headed right back to camp.

"Aaron, it was Emily's call to make. I know you would've come running but it was her call to make. But now that she is clear headed and in much better health she does want you here."

"I'll get the first plane out." He ended the call.

-CM-CM-

Washington DC

Nearly 15 hours later Hotch ran through the hospital doors and right up to the first nurse's station he could find. "Emily Prentiss? Where is she?" he panted out as best he could.

"Room 210. Are you a relative?" the dark headed nurse in pink scrubs asked looking the disheveled man up and down.

Hotch followed her eyes down his body and realized he forgot to change at the airport and was still in his cargo pants and green t-shirt that had stains all over it as well as a good layer of sand. "No I'm not but she is expecting me."

Before the nurse could say anything else JJ called his name from down the hall. "How is she? Can I see her?" he ran to the blonde.

"She's okay. She's sleeping but she is doing good. And Garcia is down by the NICU watching through the glass at the baby since they won't let anyone in except Emily. She got to see her for a few minutes but the baby is having a hard time breathing so she can't hold her yet." JJ told him as they met up with the rest of the team all piled into the small waiting room just down the hall from Emily's room.

Hotch greeted his friends and also her father who sat in the corner. "Mr. Prentiss, it's nice to see you again."

"Hotchner" the older man nodded tightly. "She's been asking for you." He stood up and waved the man towards his daughter's room. "Take it easy on her. She is still recovering from the surgery."

Hotch knocked softly on the door and pushed it open gently. Emily was lying in the bed with IV's running out of her arms and her face was somewhat paler than usual but to him she never looked more beautiful. Weeks away made him crave just the sight of her. He smiled at her mother, who stood to leave to give them some privacy and walked up to the woman in the bed.

"Emily" he whispered.

Her eyes opened slowly and after a few blinks they settled on him. "Aaron, you came?"

He chuckled slightly. "I guess you didn't want to wait till I was home to do all this." He joked trying to get a smile from her. "Sweetheart, how are you doing?" his hand ran through her dark hair pushing it away from her face so he could stare into her chocolate brown eyes.

"Couldn't wait. Maybe this was my way of getting you back. But I'm okay." She smiled reaching her hand out to touch him. "I need you to do something for me."

"Anything Em." He kissed her forehead.

She swallowed thickly knowing what she was going to ask was going to be a lot for him. "They are making me stay in this bed for a day or so but I need someone to be with my daughter. She's all alone and I need someone to be with her."

As tears brimmed her eyes Hotch bent down to her. "I'll go to her. Don't worry, she's not alone. Don't cry sweetheart." The baby still being a touchy subject for them both Hotch knew he needed to bite the bullet and do what needed to be done and right now he was needed in the NICU for a very sick baby.

"I know this is a lot for you and I'm sorry to ask but you're the only one I trust to be there if I'm not." She told him through her tears.

Hotch leaned down and kissed her softly. "I want to be here Emily. I told you already I want you and the baby."

"Lily, her name is Lily." She said wiping at her face.

"It's beautiful." He kissed her softly.

-CM-CM-

After getting doctor approval a few hours later and a rundown of the NICU rules Hotch was finally let in to see Lily. The NICU was a daunting place to see. It was quiet except for the sound of machines and the soft whispers of love and support by the four other parents in the room.

He was brought to Lily's incubator and told about the wires and tubes attached to the small baby. Hotch pulled up a stool and reached into the small bed she lay in, her tiny hand grasped his finger as soon as he touched her. He looked up at the monitor that sounded her heart rate. It was music to his ears. After learning that was a main reason for delivering her he was glad she was doing better.

His own heart had been racing since he walked in but slowed as her eyes opened slightly. Bright blues shone through bonding his soul to hers. At that very moment he knew she was his. Now he was determined for the tiny baby to leave the hospital with his last name.

He wiped his now wet cheeks on his sleeve as brought his other hand to her small head, lightly soothing her with his touch. "Hey sweet girl, are you doing okay? I know this all looks so scary but I'm here now. You don't have to be scared. Mommy and I are here baby." His whispers caught the attention of another parent a few feet away.

"When was she born?" the woman asked bring Hotch's attention away from Lily.

"Umm… yesterday." He said clearing his throat. "She's 7 weeks early but she's going to fight hard. Right Lily?" he smiled down at the baby, her eyes were closed again but he still sat in awe of her. The top of her head was covered by a tiny pink cap but he could still see some of the dark hair from underneath. He had no doubt she was going to look exactly like her mother.

"That's a beautiful name. This is Samuel. He was born almost 10 weeks early and in two days if all is still good he gets to go home." the boy was in her arms sucking down a bottle.

"That's great. How long has he been here? If you don't mind me asking?"

"Not at all. I find it comforting to talk to the other parents just to keep moral up." She shrugged. "He has been here for 5 weeks. He was doing fine after 4 weeks but he was still quite jaundice so they kept him longer. Is your wife coming down soon?"

Hotch shook his head. "No she's resting but she was here not too long ago. They won't let her come down for very long." he responded not bothering to correct her. He really didn't have the strength to explain what they were though he didn't understand it either. Too complicated he thought but what was not complicated was the baby holding on to him. He turned his attention back to her and blocked out everything else.