Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or anyone or anything from Bleach. It's as simple as that. Everything else, however, is mine. :D
Chapter 19: And the Bittersweet Goodbye
As Tennyo sealed herself I fought the urge to collapse on to my butt. Training with bankai is no joke and the way I've been going at it is especially exhausting. A couple of hours ago I managed to achieve and maintain Tennyo's bankai and I've been working with it ever since. Tennyo says I'm doing well, but I definitely still have a long way to go.
Stifling a yawn I stretch in an attempt to work the kinks out of my back. I nice long soak in the healing hot spring sounds wonderful right about now. As I make my way over to it I vaguely register that Ichigo's spiritual pressure has normalized. I guess he's done training for the evening too.
Stifling yet another yawn, I round the corner of the boulder that guards the hot spring, my hands already on the knot on the front of my shihakusho. I must really be tired because as I round the corner I see that the hot spring is already occupied. Somehow I managed to miss the fact that Ichigo's spiritual pressure was here.
Ichigo looks up at the sound of my footsteps. To both my joy and my chagrin he appears to be completely naked, his abandoned shihakusho lying behind him. I can see all of Ichigo's chest and a good part of his abs. Unease fills me at the sight of his freshly healed scars gleaming pink against the rest of his skin, but ogling the rest of his body easily distracts me.
Finally I manage to tear my eyes away from his torso and our eyes meet. Ichigo's face flushes a brilliant shade of red. He looks as embarrassed as I feel. Neither one of us moves, both of us just staring at each other. And then…
"I-I'm so sorry!" I stutter loudly, ducking back behind the boulder. My face is so hot you could probably cook an egg on it. He was sitting there in the hot spring naked and I just stood there and stared at him! Well I don't think anyone could really blame me…but it's still really embarrassing.
"It's ok!" I hear Ichigo call, his voice strangely nervous. His tone only makes my heart jump more. "I was just getting out anyways."
There is a loud splash followed by the rustling of clothing. Finally there is the sound of footsteps as Ichigo makes his way around the boulder. I do my best to get the heat in my face under control, but it doesn't seem to be working. Especially when Ichigo appears wearing just his hakamas.
"You go ahead," he tells me, apparently unwilling to meet my eye. His cheeks are still red.
"Are you sure?" I ask, forcing myself to focus on his feet before I start drooling.
"Yea," he adds kindly. "I was just about finished anyway."
Another loud splash interrupts us and we both turn to look, surprised. Yoruichi, naked as the day she was born, has emerged from the hot spring and stands next to it wringing out her hair.
"It's all yours, Taylor," she tells me with a wicked grin, flinging her hair over her shoulder.
For a moment I can only gape at her. "Yoruichi! What the hell?" I splutter once I regain some of my ability to form a coherent sentence.
"What?" she asks innocently. "I wanted to soak too."
"With Ichigo?" I all but shriek. Not only am I pissed, but I'm also jealous. Not only does she have body that I can only dream about, but she was just bathing with Ichigo. How did I not see her?
"Relax. I was a cat."
"That's besides the point!" I begin angrily. But I'm interrupted by Ichigo.
"Would you just put some clothes on already?" Ichigo shouts, his voice sounding strangled.
"Why would I want to do that?" she asks, grinning, suddenly stretching her arms languorously over her head. "If I did I would ruin your view."
It takes me a moment to process Yoruichi's words, but when I do my head turns towards him so quickly that I'm surprised I don't have whiplash. Ichigo must have slapped his hands over his eyes the moment that Yoruichi came out of the spring, but they don't seem to being doing him much good as his fingers are cracked, allowing me to a see a flash of his brown eyes between them.
Something inside me explodes. "You pervert! Why the hell are you peeking?"
Ichigo turns to me his eyes wide with surprise and his face so red it's nearly purple. "I wasn't peeking! My fingers slipped!" The fact that his voice has gone up an octave reveals his lie.
"And now you're lying about it?"
"I'm not! I swear!"
Yoruichi walks by us, chuckling. I'm already pissed beyond hell and the realization that she has purposely been teasing us makes me lose it completely.
"Leave!" I scream at Ichigo, shoving him hard. "Just leave me alone!"
Ichigo looks like he wants to argue, but thinks better of it. Instead he quickly gathers the clothes he dropped when he "covered" his eyes and hurries away without a background glance.
I stare daggers at his retreating back breathing heavily. Great. Nice to know that Ichigo is a perverted bastard. And Yoruichi? I could kill her right now. Still thinking these vehement thoughts I strip my shihakusho off and jump in the hot spring to soak.
…
Moonlight shines in through the boards that have been used to hastily cover the entrance to the cave. It's late, but I'm having trouble sleeping. Yoruichi has disappeared. It's now just Ichigo and me. He was even nice enough to let me have the futon, while he sits up against the wall. But the fact that I'm hyper aware of his presence is making it even harder for me to sleep.
"Ichigo…" I begin quietly. "Are you awake?"
"Now I am," he grumbles lowly as he shifts. And then, louder, "Yea. What do you want?"
Ah. I guess he's still annoyed with me for what happened earlier. "Well…" I begin timidly, glad that the darkness hides the heat in my cheeks. "I'm sorry…about earlier. I guess I kind of over reacted…" As I wait with bated breath for Ichigo to respond, I silently berate myself. I'm such an idiot. I keep doing all these stupid things and then I have to apologize for them. Why do I have to be such a spaz?
"Don't worry about it," Ichigo replies gruffly after what seems like an eternity.
I turn to glance over my shoulder at him. I can just make out Ichigo's face in the moonlight. He's watching me, his eyes soft. My face warms even more and my heart thrums pleasantly in my chest. Suddenly feeling rather warm and fuzzy I burrow deeper into the futon and close my eyes feeling peaceful.
Just as I am about to drift off to sleep Ichigo speaks and I am instantly awake again. "So…there's something I'm kind of…worried about…"
Felling slightly surprised, I roll over completely to face him. He refuses to meet my eyes. "What is it?" I ask, concerned.
"Well…it's just that…I've worked so hard to get stronger so that I could come here and rescue you and Rukia." Ichigo blushes at this but continues. "And you managed to handle everything on your own just fine, but Rukia seems like she's in an even worse position now. There are only a few days left until her execution and between now and then I have to learn bankai and get strong enough to save her."
Ichigo pauses here and is quiet for a long while. Just as I'm getting impatient he speaks again. "It's just I'm not sure I can do it. It seems impossible, but Yoruichi said that I'm the only one who has a chance. There's only me. And if I fail…" Silence stretches on for what seems like eternity. "I don't know if I can really do this."
I can't help but frown a bit as I consider Ichigo, who has become very interested in the ground between his feet. This doesn't sound like him at all. He has every right to be troubled, but I've never seen him so uncertain. He must really be worried about this. And it touches me that he has confided in him. I have to do something to make him feel better.
I suddenly have to fight the urge to smirk as an idea of how I can boost his confidence hits me. "Yea, you're probably right."
Ichigo's eyes snap up to mine, surprise in them. "Huh?"
"I said you're right," I reply smoothly, shrugging lightly as I roll away from him again. "This probably is too much for you."
"Are you serious?" Ichigo asks. It bothers me that there's an edge of hurt in his tone, but he mostly sounds irritated.
"Absolutely. I mean you only really got this far by accident right?" I say, waving my hand flippantly. "Even in the fights you did win you just barely got by. And you've had so much help. How much were you really doing on your own? And now you have to get bankai in three days and defeat all of the Soul Society to save Rukia? You should probably just give up now. I mean you're really only a substitute anyways. You couldn't stop them from bringing us here so why would you be able to stop them now?"
There is a long moment when the silence is suffocating before Ichigo's spiritual pressure explodes behind me. And while I was purposely trying to provoke him something instinctual inside me writhes in fear at the wildness of it.
"So what if I've just been barely scraping by since I've been here. So what if I've had a lot of help," Ichigo begins, his voice low but very angry. "You have no idea what I've been through to get this far. I don't care what the odds are! I don't care if I'm just a substitute! I won't let anything like what happened before happen again. I will protect the people I care about! I will get bankai and I will save Rukia no matter what you say!" Ichigo is shouting now.
I glance over my shoulder at him. He is standing, his clothes and hair whipping in the force created by his spiritual pressure. His eyes are blazing as he glares down at me. I can't stop myself from smirking smugly. "That's what I thought."
Surprise crosses Ichigo's face. And then, abruptly, his spiritual pressure calms. "You did that on purpose," he asks, smiling ruefully.
"Yep."
Ichigo falls back against the wall and slides down it into a sitting position, seemingly exhausted. "That was dirty."
"But it worked."
"Yea…thanks Taylor."
"Any time," I reply, smiling for real now as I turn away.
"Yoruichi told me you were working on bankai too. Are you going to help me save Rukia?" Ichigo asks abruptly. As much as it pleases me to hear the normal confidence in his voice again I can't help but stiffen at the question.
"No," I finally answer. "There's something else I need to take care of first."
"Does it have something to do with the Soul Reaper that they mistook you for?"
I glance of my shoulder at Ichigo, taken aback. "Hat n' clogs told me about it," he shrugs.
"How much did he tell you?"
"Not much more than that."
"Yes. It's got something to do with her."
Ichigo is quiet, but when I'm not forthcoming with more information he questions me further. "So? What's the big deal about her? What're you trying to do?"
"It's a long story," I sigh in reply. "Suffice it to say that there was a certain…incident here a long time ago. And I'm out to pay back the people who did it and make sure they never do it again."
Ichigo considers this for a moment. "Alright. Fair enough. We should probably try to get some sleep now."
Murmuring my assent I close my eyes with the intention of sleeping. But I've had a thought. And now that I've had it, it won't leave me alone. "You know," I begin in small voice, embarrassed and uncertain about how he'll take it. "You don't have to sleep sitting up."
"What do you mean?" Ichigo asks, perplexed.
"Well…we could share the futon…"
"Share…the futon?" Ichigo replies, his voice sounding odd.
"Yea," I add hurriedly, scooting over to the edge. "It's a big futon. There's enough room for both of us." I don't dare turn and look at Ichigo. I'm certain my face is on fire as hot as it is.
"Yea. Ok." Ichigo finally answers.
If I was hyper aware of him before it's nothing compared to how I feel now. I hear him stand, his shihakusho rustling, his feet scuffing the floor. He approaches the futon and lays down on the opposite edge, his back just barely brushing against mine and his body as stiff as a board.
We lay there in awkward and tense silence for moment and then his warmth begins to seep into me. I feel myself relax whether I want to or not and Ichigo responds in kind. Ichigo's ever present spiritual pressure calms and as it washes around me I feel safer than I have in a very long time.
With his warmth at my back and his comforting presence all around me I fall into the first deep sleep I've had since coming to the Soul Society.
…
When Ichigo awoke early morning light was filtering in through the cracks of the boards that covered the entrance to the cave. He lay there for a moment, sprawled out across the futon, wondering why he was awake. Taylor was gone. And once he realized that Ichigo found that he felt strangely chilled. The warmth and safety he had felt last night with Taylor's presence at his back was gone too.
But she was still there. He could feel her spiritual pressure fluctuating below him. Apparently she had decided to get an early start on her training for the day. Ichigo sat up and stretched. Now that he was awake there really wasn't any point in wasting time lying around.
Ichigo descended into the training area, did some proper stretches and warmed up. He had just finished readjusting his shihakusho once he'd finished when he heard a footfall behind him. Ichigo turned to see Taylor standing a short distance away looking tired, but determined.
"I'm done," she said quietly.
Ichigo frowned in thought for a moment. "Done with what?"
"My training."
"Oh…" Something inside Ichigo wilted at her words. "So I guess that means you're heading out to do whatever you're gonna do." Taylor's only response was to nod mutely.
They stood there awkwardly for a long moment. Ichigo searched for something to say, but couldn't think of anything that wasn't along the lines of 'I don't want you to go'. Their reunion had been so short and now she was leaving again. And there was no way to know if either of them of would survive the battles ahead. There was so much that Ichigo wanted to say, but he was too terrified to speak.
"Well…good luck," Ichigo finally forced himself to say. He tried to smile too, but it was painful and he was sure that it was a poor excuse for one.
Taylor's smile in return didn't reach her eyes. "Thanks. You too."
Ichigo watched stilly and silently, unable to move or speak, as Taylor walked past him. She seemed to be forcing herself not to look in his direction and it tore him up inside. He wanted to help her, but he knew that she would not appreciate it if he abandoned Rukia to her fate.
Abruptly Taylor paused, as if a thought had just occurred to her. She turned towards Ichigo a new look of resolve on her face. Ichigo barely had enough time to blink in confusion before Taylor had disappeared and reappeared in front of him in a single shunpo step.
Ichigo's breath caught in his throat as he looked down at Taylor. She was standing so close to him, barely an inch away. She stared back at him, her blue eyes wide and innocent and yet filled with steely determination. An electric current seemed to run between them as their gazes locked.
And then Taylor stood up on her tiptoes and gently brushed her lips against Ichigo's.
A fire sparked where their lips met and quickly blazed through every inch of Ichigo's body. His mind was both hyper aware and completely absent at the same time. Everything- time, the universe, his own heartbeat- disappeared at the soft feeling of Taylor's lips. Ichigo would have happily drowned in the sensation.
And then it was over. Taylor pulled away, blushing furiously, and turned to shunpo away. But Ichigo didn't want her to leave. The kiss- both his first kiss and theirs- had been far too brief. He wanted more. So before Taylor could get out of reach- and as far as Ichigo knew once she was gone she would be forever- he stretched out is hand and wrapped it gently around her arm.
…
When I wake up the next morning it is to the fading darkness of night and an ominous feeling in the air. Whatever is going to happen is going to happen today. I'm sure of it. Which means, simply, that I don't have any more time to waste.
I glance over my shoulder at Ichigo. It seems like neither of us has moved during the night. As much as I am loathe leaving his warmth I'm not ready to face what's going to happen yet. I need more practice. Reluctantly I stand, but before I head down to the training area I glance back at Ichigo. Almost immediately he rolls onto his back and stretches out. By look on his face he isn't more peaceful like this though. Perhaps he's missing my warmth as much as I'm missing his. I shake myself mentally. I need to focus now.
I head down the ladder and begin my training. It is grueling, especially after working so hard yesterday. But by the time I'm done both Tennyo and I are satisfied. I'm as ready as I'm ever going to be. As I sheathe Tennyo I feel Ichigo's spiritual pressure brush against my own. I guess he's awake too.
I pause before heading over towards him and the ladder. It's time to say my goodbyes. And for all I know they could be final. Butterflies bounce uncomfortably around in my stomach. What am I going to say? I have no idea. As I ponder this, my feet carry me closer without me noticing and before I know it I just have to walk around a boulder and I'll see him. I pause again, nerves filling me with hyper energy.
No. It doesn't matter what I'm going to say. Well…it does. But standing here hiding isn't going to get me anywhere! I can feel it…that sense of impending…something. I can't waste any more time. Squaring my shoulders I walk around the side of the boulder.
Ichigo turns at the sound of my footsteps. He's all sweaty- probably from getting ready to train too. My heart is in my throat. I don't want to do this. I don't want to leave. But…but…
We say our good byes. Well actually Ichigo just tells me good luck. It seems like such a hollow, empty thing to say in this situation. But there's more behind it that he can't put words to and that's what gives me some feeling of closure. I make to walk past him, determined not to look at him. If I do my resolve will break and everything I've worked so hard for the past couple of days will be for nothing. But there's so much more I want to say to him. My footsteps slow the farther I get from Ichigo, as if my body is just as reluctant to leave things like this as my heart.
That's when it hits me. This could very well be the last time we ever see each other. One- or both- of us could die today and that would be the end of it. I feel sick at the thought. So I can't leave like this. Without making my feelings for Ichigo clear. With leaving everything between us just hanging. I may not be able to say anything…but there's something else I can do.
I turn towards Ichigo again, filled with new determination, and with a single shunpo step I close the distance between us. My breath catches in my throat, as I look up into his face. His brown eyes are wide with surprise and strangely innocent. Clearly he has no idea what I'm about do. I take a deep breath, stand up on my toes, and then…
I brush my lips against his.
I don't know about fireworks, but something definitely exploded. Heat races through my veins, filling my entire body with intense fire. I feel strangely light headed. Like I'm literally on cloud nine. This is my first time kissing anyone and I had no idea it would feel this good. Actually it feels amazing. I never want this sensation to end, but I know it must. So I pull away.
I can deal with this. This is a goodbye that I'm satisfied with, even if I die today. Right? Not really. But it's the best I can do. So I turn away, intending to head towards whatever awaits me. Until Ichigo's hand closes around my arm just above my elbow.
He tugs me back towards him gently, but firmly. Caught off balance in the beginning of my first shupo step I have no opportunity to resist. He turns me as I fall back towards him and I end up with my chest pressed against his. As I open my mouth to question his actions his mouth crashes against mine and all words and thoughts disappear.
All I can say is that it's a good thing that Ichigo's arms are wrapped around me, because if he wasn't supporting me I probably would have fallen by now. I have no desire to support myself at the moment, however. I'm perfectly happy to let myself melt into him, simply losing myself in the feeling of his lips as his mouth moves against mine. There seems to be an electric current running through our bodies and in every place where our skin meets there are pleasant tingles.
When Ichigo finally, and reluctantly, pulls away we're both breathless. Ichigo leans his forehead against my own and I find myself trapped in his eyes. They're like liquid pools of dark honey, burning slowly with an emotion that I'm too shy to name. But though I don't dare put a name to it I can feel it spark the same emotion within me. My heart is pounding so hard now it almost hurts.
"Don't die," Ichigo tells me, his voice husky but forceful.
"I won't," I promise him quietly. I stare up into his eyes with the same intensity that he looks at me with, unable to look away even if I had wanted to.
And then Ichigo blinks and the spell is broken. He releases his grip on me and I step away. Without a backward glance- because our goodbye truly is finished now- I shunpo away. It sill hurts to leave. But I have no regrets now. I'm ready to face what will come. Resolve, stronger than any I've felt before, fills me.
Up the ladder and out of the cave I go. But I pause on the ledge outside the cave where Yoruichi sits watching the sunrise. She doesn't seem to notice my arrival until I walk up next to her and speak. "Ichigo's waiting for you, you know."
Yoruichi starts and twists around to look at me. Seemingly satisfied that I'm no threat she turns back towards the east. "Ok. Thanks for letting me know. I take it your heading out then?"
"Yea… You're worrying about Ichigo, aren't you." Yoruichi doesn't respond. I can't help but feel slightly frustrated. "You shouldn't. This is Ichigo we're talking about. He can do it."
"How can you be so sure?"
I'm a bit taken aback by the deep sadness in Yoruichi's eyes as she looks at me. She looks so…old. And weary. "Because I know him," I declare mulishly "Ichigo will do anything to help anyone he cares about. And if he says he'll do something he will. He won't give up. All you need to do is trust him."
Yoruichi looks at me for a long moment, considering, before a wry smile stretches across her face. "I suppose you're right," she says, standing and stretching. "All I can do now is put my faith in him and help him as best as I can. Though…" she turns to me, and this time her smile is devious. "I wonder how you know Ichigo so well."
My face instantly heats up at Yoruichi's insinuation, especially after what just happened. "I-I don't know what you're talking about," I mumble in reply, unable to maintain eye contact with her.
Yoruichi throws back her head and laughs. "That's what I thought!"
I turn away from her, embarrassed and irritated, and she walks back towards the entrance to the cave. "Be careful, Taylor." Surprised, I turn back towards her. Yoruichi is completely serious now, her last words obviously sincere.
"Thanks, Yoruichi," I reply smiling.
With that we go our separate ways. I shunpo off into the forest surrounding Sokyoku Hill and Yoruichi heads back into the cave. I feel better now that I'm on my way. I almost feel hopeful. Perhaps everything will work out after all and I'll survive my coming battles. With a sense of purpose pushing me forwards I make good time and the sun is only just properly up by the time I reach the edge of the forest. All thoughts of my progress forwards is erased from my mind, however, as I sense another spiritual pressure heading fast in my direction.
I land on a branch, the wood bouncing beneath my feet, in order to await his arrival. And I don't have to wait long. Only moments later he lands on a branch opposite mine. I allow my lips to curve into a smirk. "'Sup, baboon brain?"
He scowls at me as his brilliant red hair waves in the breeze. "I have a name you know."
"I know." My smirk widens. "But baboon brain fits you so much better."
I can literally see a vein pop in his forehead as his fights to control his temper. "Whatever," he finally grinds out. "You're in my way. Move. I'm in a hurry."
"Well that's interesting. Here I am, an escaped and wanted prisoner, and all you can think about is getting somewhere else. I'm hurt, pineapple head." I quickly drop my mocking tone, allowing my hand to rest on Tennyo's hilt. My voice now icy I continue, "Where are you headed to in such a hurry, Lieutenant of Squad Six?" He's heading towards Ichigo right now, I'm sure. And depending on what his answer is he may or may not be about to lose a limb or two.
Renji's face suddenly hardens. "They've moved it up. Rukia's execution. It's today."
My hand tightens involuntarily around Tennyo's hilt. Well that certainly explains the ominous feeling I've had since I woke up. This is not good. This is very not good. Unable to stop myself I glance back towards Sokyoku Hill. This is a hurdle that they weren't anticipating. But no…it doesn't matter. I mentally shake myself. I have faith in Ichigo. He'll save Rukia no matter what the odds.
Renji stares hard at me for a long moment before suddenly shrugging dismissively. "There's no need for you to look so worried you know. I'm not about to leave Rukia's rescue up to that orange-headed idiot."
My mouth pops open in surprise and he smirks in response. And- I find I can't help myself- I grin back. "That's a good answer, Renji Abarai."
Renji blinks in surprise at the sound of his name and I take it as my cue to head out again. But before I take off into a full shunpo I pause on the branch that Renji stands on. "That's more like it," I murmur to him, shoving his shoulder lightly.
And then I'm off again, heading towards Central 46 as fast as I can go. No more distractions. It's time to finish what Aizen started all those years ago.
Author's Note:
Chapter 19! And what everyone was waiting for I'm sure! Yes they finally kissed. And then Taylor left! I'm kinda mean huh? I'm particularly fond of the scene at the beginning too. I've wanted to include something like that for a while and I'm glad I finally figured out a way to fit it in. And Taylor made up with Renji at the end. There's two reasons for that. The first is that while I'm kinda mean to Renji in earlier chapters I actually really like him. He's pretty much my favorite character actually. And eventually- like in the third story- Taylor and Renji are going to be interacting fairly often so it's good for them to be on friendly terms. And I realize that Ichigo fretting about his ability to do something is kind of OOC, but he seriously can't be completely self-confident all the time. So I've given him a moment of weakness that Taylor can help him through.
So there are two more chapters of this story left. The next one will be the climax where Taylor has her final fights, takes on Aizen, etc. And the last one will be a kind of epilogue/wrap up and will segue into the sequel. Get excited! I should be able to keep posting despite being in my training program. But it'll probably be more like every other week than every week like it's been for the past couple of months. Sorry :(
Citations:
None this time! Yay!
Six reviews! Thank you to Sora'struelover, Shaybo27, bleach fan no 1, Shannyrox101, violentyetawesome, and bored411! If you read please review! I greatly appreciate it!
Thanks for reading!
imagination junkie