Anna's screams could be heard throughout the hall, and it was killing Robert inside to listen to her frantic pleas as he sat next to her, "Robert! Robert! Please…don't go Robert…I'm sorry, I'm so very sorry…It was the only way...I was a fool and I couldn't bear to pay for that with your life…He'd have killed you…I wouldn't be able to live with myself if he had…ROBERT!"
"I'm not leaving you Luv. Never again. It's just the fever sweetheart. I'm here and you're safe. We're together," no matter how many times he tried to reassure her, she was lost to him. Robin had woken him a couple of hours before to tell him that they needed to talk about options and he'd instantly seen how deathly pale Anna was, and how she glistened with a thin, sheen of sweat. She was burning up. It had gone down hill from there, faster than Patrick could make his way to the room, Anna's fever had spiked and her torment had begun. At first her delirium had been focused on her childhood, but for the last half hour he'd listened as she relived the first explosion to separate them and he couldn't take it anymore, "Robin, for God's sake, do something. There has to be something you can give her. She's in hell."
"Dad, I'm doing everything I can. Do you think I like listening to Mom scream like that," Robin replied continuing to wipe her mother's brow with a cool wash clothe and trying desperately to quell her rising anger and frustration, "Mom's snowballing. The pressure in her brain caused the headache, which stressed her body into the fever, and now I'm trying desperately to bring it down before it causes her to start seizing, but there's only so much I can do without causing greater harm. Mom's had a bad reaction to anesthesia including analgesics in the past. When she had the surgery to try to save Leora, she almost died and then had another lesser reaction during the proceeding C-section. I can't just give her anything, and most of the drugs that I know she's not sensitive to are opiate based which poses a risk for a seizure patient."
"So we do nothing…" Robert couldn't accept it. How could they possibly just sit on their hands and watch while Anna suffered?
"No, Dad. We do what we're doing. We continue to talk to her and try our best to soothe her. We continue with the cooling blanket and the cold compresses. We continue with the acetaminophen and the saline drip, and Patrick has added Tramadol to her medications. There's been great success combining it with acetaminophen for pain management without aggravating seizures in epileptic patients, so while Mom isn't epileptic we're holding out hope that the same will hold true in the case of her seizures."
"I'm sorry sweetheart; I don't mean to be difficult. There just has to be something more. She's calling for me. She thinks I've left her again, and I just can't take it."
"Dad, don't forget what she said that day in the Maarkham Islands. You're the only man she's ever allowed to rescue her. She knows you're here and she knows you're moving heaven and earth for her. She knows you love her. I'm going to go talk to Patrick about increasing her dosage of acetaminophen. I'll be right back, you just keep talking to her," Robin kissed her mother on the forehead and walked out of the room trying her best to keep her tears at bay. While she did need to talk to Patrick, more than anything she needed a minute to compose herself. Watching her strong larger than life mother so sick was taking it's toll on her, and she needed to pull it together so that she could continue to do her best to get her mother through this crisis, and hell her father too because as time passed it became more and more obvious to her that if God forbid they lost this battle her father would absolutely lose his mind.
Robert stayed in the room, wiping Anna's brow and holding her hand, willing her his strength, and begging God to let him take her place as he continued to listen to her delirious ramblings, "It hurts Robert…I knew it would…but not like this…I can't do it Robert…I need you…our baby needs you…Oh, Filomena, I don't have one more left…I need Robert…" Robert could only guess by her new cries that she was reliving Robin's birth, yet another shining example of his failure to come through for her. She'd been so confident on that first mission empowered by all the bravado of an eighteen year old girl. She'd been so good at presenting the front that he hadn't realized her true age until the first time they'd made love, and it pained him to think of that young girl that had adored him and so timidly told him, "I wanted…I just wanted it to be wonderful," scared and in pain baring his child without him. In that moment, he decided to change tactics in his attempts to comfort her. If he couldn't bring her to him, he'd go to her. He'd play along with the hallucination and hopefully, even if only for a moment, change history for her, "I know it does sweetheart, but Filomena's right. You do have one more left. You're an incredibly strong woman, and you can do it." He'd talked her through it and felt her calm, she was still incredibly hot and he knew they were still battling the fever, but at the very least her delirium had settled into a calm recounting of her life. If it weren't for the circumstances, he'd almost call it peaceful and he found himself losing himself in the fantasy with her and allowing himself to imagine if even for a second that he hadn't been a self-righteous ass and really had been present for all of these moments. They had just moved on to that fateful day when Anna had shown up at his apartment saying that she was in trouble when Robin returned.
"How is she?"
"Still burning up, but no longer restless."
"Robert, I need your help…," Anna interrupted.
"Robin's here Luv. She's been with me the whole time. Wu brought her to me. She's safe and all three of us are together," Robert soothed as he motioned for Robin to come closer and take Anna's hand.
"You'll take care of her?" Anna insisted.
"Of course, I will darling. We both will. Just like we always…," Robert felt himself pushed out of the way before he could finish the sentence and time simultaneously sped up and slowed down.
"Mom!" Robin yelled as she saw her mother's body begin to tense. She knew what was coming and pushed her father back into the chair by the bed as she quickly paged Patrick and started issuing orders to increase the phenobarbitol and immediately cease the Tramadol.
Things seemed to happen at a break neck speed, yet Robert was watching them occur in slow motion. Robert Scorpio was not a man known for his humility. He'd always been a hero and he knew it, but every hero had his moment. He'd thought that once before that he had reached it as he lay helpless in a hospital bed with Anna tending to his every need as if he were a child, and heard it thrown back at him not twenty four hours before by Anna herself, but it was not until this precise moment that he fully understood the concept. They'd both been wrong. Every hero must face the moment in which he realizes that at the end of the day he is indeed human, and nothing made it clearer to him than watching the love of his life convulsing on a bed and not being able to do a damn thing about it. It was not a hero, but a husband and a lover that stood there and watched Anna's body still as she flatlined. It was not a god, but a father that held Robin back as she strained to get back to her mother yelling "Mommy, please!" while Patrick shocked Anna causing her body to jolt violently off the bed. It was a mere man that wept with relief and gratitude when on the third attempt the single flat line on the heart monitor started going up and down again signaling that Anna's heart was once again beating at a nice, steady rhythm. He forced himself to push his feelings down and face Patrick, "How is she? Is she alright now?"
"Far from it. It's a miracle we were able to get her back, and she's barely holding on. We really are at an impasse," Patrick answered with genuine sadness in his heart, "She was already weak from the first prolonged seizure and now after this event she's even weaker. She won't survive surgery if I take her into the OR in this condition, but without surgery I don't think she'll make it another 72 hours. It's just too much trauma, and the EEG is still showing seizure activity in her brain."
"No," Robin beat Robert to the punch, "we are not giving up. Don't you dare give up on her Patrick. Tell us what to do, and we'll do it, but come up with a plan of action."
"Ok then," Patrick sighed, "our best bet right now will be to place her in a medically induced coma to hopefully stop the seizure activity and then operate tomorrow once her body has had a chance to rest. I do need both of you to understand though, that the odds are not in our favor. She's on a ventilator, and has a history of adverse reactions to anesthesia. It's a complex surgery in the best of cases, but in her case there's the added pressure of the clock. Every minute she's under is a minute the anesthesia could cause her to arrest. It is possible that we're going to get into the OR and lose her on the table, so I suggest that you spend this time with her telling her anything that you need for her to know, and be prepared to let her go. She's putting up a hell of a fight for all of us, but she's in pain and it's not an easy fight."
"My mom isn't a quitter. She's never quit on us, so we're not quitting on her. She doesn't need anyone doubting her, so either put on your game face or I'll find another surgeon," Robin responded giving Patrick a look that dared him to defy her and walking back into her mother's room.
Robert followed her sensing that her response was more of the bravado that she'd inherited from Anna than anything else. That bravado mixed with the tendency to brood that she'd gotten from him was a recipe for disaster, but he didn't now how to diffuse the situation so he just sat there watching her lie in bed with her mother whispering into her ear. Those two had always been thick as thieves. May be because unlike him, Anna always knew just how to handle their daughter. She knew when to touch and when to talk and what to say when she did, while he usually ended up creating a Scorpio vs. Scorpio clash of the titans even when his only intention was to comfort his daughter. They were a loving family, but somehow he'd always felt that Anna and Robin were a unit and somehow he was just lucky enough to complete the picture. Although if he was honest with himself, it was his fault. The tendency to brood wasn't the only thing Robin had gotten from him. Her fear that good things would be taken away from her came from him too. He'd never truly let himself bond with his daughter because his love for her was so intense that he was sure he was bound to lose her and losing her would surely kill him. He'd kept her at arms length to protect his own heart, and now he was paying the price. How he wished he knew what Robin was saying, that for a moment she could trust him and let him in like he should have let her in so long ago. They were facing their greatest fear and somehow he knew they only way they'd make it to the other side was if stuck together.