A/N - Chapters will probably be a little shorter than the last one. With the other stories going on, I can't really upkeep 12000 words a chapter. Also, I'm changing it to "T" until I put something in worthy of the "M" rating, which I may not.
"The winner, and new Inter-dimensional Cake Eating Challenge Grand Champion is...!"
Hearts pounded from their rib-cages and rang in their ears as the announcer excitedly held up a hand, his voice blaring through the PA system of the makeshift park-stadium.
"...A TIE! For the first time in ICEC history, we have a dead-heat tie for first place!"
For most of the event, nothing but positive encouragement could be heard from most of the fans. However, once the controversial declaration was made, a large, red, angry chorus of boos, hisses, and demands for retribution tore through the evening sky.
"Ladies and gentlemen, your new ICEC Grand Champions, Princess Celestia of Equestria, and Mr. Nigel Ratburn!"
The impassioned scene Ratburn and Celestia shared just moments before was trumped by a wave of outrage. One could swear Ratburn's teeth were grinding together hard enough to make flour for bread, while Celestia gasped in pure horror with a loathing scowl crossing her features at the obviously rigged, half-assed ruling. The volatile rat launched out of his seat, kicking it behind him as hard as he could.
"I DEMAND A RECOUNT!"
He was about ready to go over and punch the emcee in the face if not for the tight security already trying to calm the rebellious crowd. Celestia stood from her own seat, though throwing less of a tantrum than her combatant did.
"I DEMAND A REMATCH!"
Upon hearing Celestia, Ratburn turned in her direction, shooting another icy stare at her as she did to him. Though imperceptibly, wisps of the encounter before had softened their cold-blooded fury, and only angered them more in confusion. The announcer tried his best to ensure the attendees of the undeniable validity and fairness of the judges deliberation.
"People, people, there was no doubt in any of the judges' minds that both Mr. Ratburn and Princess Celestia had eaten the same volume of cake in the same amount of time! The rules are the rules, and for the sake of strict adherence to schedule, no overtime tie-breaker rounds are allowed!"
"HAAAANG HIIIIIM!" one of the approaching dissenters cried as a huge mob was starting to surround the center field.
The announcer swiftly called for more reinforcements on the security, as the current interspersed sentries were being pushed back by the angry patrons, tanked on various forms of alcohol, some not entirely legal slipping past the front counter checks. As he tried further and more desperately to calm everyone down, they just forced their ways through harder. They became more violent, shouting curses and shoving the security guards out of their ways, and the guards had to counteract it. The detainment methods they used escalated to inflicting physical harm on the fans, which only spurred them on more. Soon, it became nothing but pure survival instinct as the two warring sides began a stadium-wide street-fight, beating and bashing at everything that was or wasn't in a blue jumpsuit.
Here, the ICEC experienced the worst post-game riot in almost one-hundred years...
How the chaos had been quelled was anyone's guess. It might have been the security team, showering tear gas, police batons, and rubber bullets on the exacerbated patrons intent on quenching their blood-lust. Maybe a few of them had come to admit that the two contestants were reasonably matched by each other, and begrudgingly conceded to the still very watered-down results. Within the hour, various slices of succulent cake were divvied up between the calmed audience, thanking one another and happily digging in. Most of the crowds and contestants were counting on returning home as soon as possible, therefore leaving well before the munchies were passed out.
Ratburn had sprinted for the next available toilet again, the combination of thick, moist dessert and scorching hot sauce left whatever remained of his blown out colon unbearable to abuse anymore tonight. Celestia tried to be as dignified as possible in securing her own porter-john, but with the lines going on forever and five minute waits a piece, she had to all but toss someone aside, slamming the door behind her and leaving her own sizable impression on the smell receptors of anyone unlucky enough to pass by. All in all, they both thought the ruling was flawed, but as for their performances, they knew they both gave it everything they had, though they still claimed victory over the other nevertheless.
As the opening ceremonies concluded, Ratburn and Celestia being rewarded while they shared a "#1" platform, trying to bump each other off at some points, the remains of the excitement of the grueling whole day of stuffing themselves silly subsided. The cheering sections trickled toward their vehicles, tour buses, mobile homes, and interplanetary craft, celebrating the memorable event as one they would not easily forget, or in some drunks' cases, remember the next day.
"Well...Celestia..." Ratburn went up to her one last time before they packed up their things and headed off to their destinations. He wanted to remain firm and strong, giving a front of confidence, but the heated encounter from that last match caused him to gulp slightly now as he gazed into her eyes. It wasn't like him to lose his trademark champion mentality, but this new perspective of the white princess was messing with his head. Why was this woman, among the many others he had been so free and able to cast aside, suddenly so striking, so unapproachable, so...alluring? He tried to shake the thoughts out, but to no avail. He couldn't kid himself that the sun goddess was the major reason he kept on coming back to the ICEC every year, even if that urge was simply to challenge the mare. Either way, he had to speak to her now, can't make this more awkward than it already is.
"Yes...Nigel?..." She couldn't keep herself from using his first name, as she would typically spit out his last as if it were a piece of garbage in competition. She noticed the change in his demeanor instantly, the sweaty brow, the nervous eye shifts. Somehow, his actions were contagious as she felt a lump in her own throat at what he might possibly say. Celestia couldn't deny what had just happened on that stage either, and the long forgotten feeling it stirred in her. What feeling exactly? Well, that's the difficult part to tell. For so many years she thought he was kind of repulsive. He always had to one-up everyone when it came to loving cake, and was an incredibly sore winner, loser, and everything in between. Though, she had known him for so long now, and not only did she expect him to come to every ICEC, she sort of found herself...wanting him to be there. He seemed to want to say something, so she steeled herself and waited for him.
"...You fought valiantly...good match..."
In a gesture Celestia never, in a million years, thought she would have seen the rat perform to her, he extended his arm and hand, indicative of his desire to shake her hoof. It surprised her, to say the least, if the dumbfounded "o" she gave him was any indication. The look on his face was quite awkward, as it held a little tinge of something. Was it humiliation, embarrassment, or some foreign emotion entirely? Although the fellow champion didn't want to push her luck, seeing as she felt the same unease in speaking to him, a stray thought left her lips before she could wrangle it back into her mind.
"Why Mr. Ratburn, is the formidable Father of Frosting actually congratulating little old me?"
Ratburn shifted uncomfortably, almost angrily so, as Celestia teased him in his moment of weakness. It was exactly the response she had hoped for, though it crossed her mind that she didn't want to emasculate him or anything, which seemed like a possibility.
"If you're going to be THAT way..." the rat almost retracted his handshake, humiliation creeping through his body at her quip. Before he could even finish his spoken thought, Celestia's hoof shot out to him, making him involuntarily grab as his opponent shook his hand in reciprocation.
"You were a staunch contender yourself, Nigel...I agree it was a good match indeed!"
If one image would be implanted in Ratburn's mind from this whole tournament, it would be the way Celestia smiled openly, warmly, and to him of all creatures. In the twenty years he had participated in the ICEC, he never once saw her give him any look but a heated, competitive glare, or, if he was lucky, an ice cold smirk denoting her victories over him. It could've just been the dimming stadium lighting, casting a mysterious glowing effect over the field, but he saw just how brightly her eyes shined at him. His arm almost went limp, forgetting their good faith motion, as his attention was completely arrested by them. It was so unusual, a little upsetting, given his initial impressions of her being some she-devil banshee who lived to destroy his fame, fortune, and worst of all, test his love for cake with her own. Then again, here he was, entranced by them for one reason or another, unable to make heads or tails of the whole situation.
"Yes...well..." Ratburn had to clear his throat, that had gone dry, after the shaking was done, "I suppose I will be seeing you again at the next year's ICEC then?"
"Wow Nigel, way to keep your cool! You sound like you just sucked in some helium!" he admonished himself for being so tightly wound, still keeping a hopefully collected level of eye contact with the mare.
Celestia reasoned with herself that maybe Ratburn was just suffering some after-burn from the sizzling cake. He looked and sounded far too nervous for her own comfort. If he had been completely recovered from their kiss scene and hadn't been shaking in his shoes, she would've been able to discard the weird thoughts and feelings going through her own mind much easier. This, however, was intensifying her awareness that things had somehow changed between them without either of them knowing it. She hoped her own voice wouldn't crack like his did...
"I certainly will! I have to reclaim that which is rightfully mine, and mine alone, after all!"
The rat was submerged in relief at the knowledge. It seems as if she didn't register his tiny hints, admitting, through body language, that the kiss had prodded something deep in his soul, and had been further tempered with the flames of rivalry. He was, after all, a competitive being. He always wanted to know more and be more distinguished than his colleagues, and to be the greatest molder of young minds that had ever walked the Earth. This situation was no different. Somehow, the ire he felt toward her, and the love of cake they both vehemently fought over had turned into something strangely bonding between them. This was reinforced by the second reason he was relieved at her response, that he secretly wanted to see her again...no...scratch that...he NEEDED to see her again.
"Oh ho ho," he fake chuckled to keep those feelings from surfacing, "I think not, my dear! It is I who will win the next contest! You will not be so fortunate the NEXT time we meet!"
At least Ratburn seemed to be livening up a little. The sun goddess was grateful for that display. She unconsciously sized him up in her head as she took in his somewhat more confident form. Celestia wasn't completely sure what Ratburn's world was like, but she had a good idea of the kind of character he was. He gave off that aura of anxiety around other women that told her he must not have much experience in the arena of opposite gender relationships. In fact, she had even watched him shy away from most females at this event despite the cocky, overblown attitude he demonstrated to her and the rest of his idiotic fan-base. It was never made clear whether or not he had ever had a wife, or...girlfriend, she remembered the alternative for marefriend, for that matter. Though, such information probably wouldn't come up at the ICEC. She actually felt kind of...flattered that not only was she the only female he had ever openly criticized, ridiculed, or socialized with at all, but that now, with this new development, she seemed to be the first female to fluster him into opening up to her, and possibly feeling something he had hardly ever felt before.
"Oh, I think you'll eat your words soon enough, Ratburn!"
Ratburn couldn't think of anything else to say. He didn't want to stick around with the princess raising his body temperature, but he also didn't want to leave either, knowing that Celestia would go back to her world soon enough. He turned his head, looking for something else to comment on before she could leave. It seemed as if Arthur was speaking to the princess' little violet friend about something. He clasped on the opportunity like his life depended on it.
"Would you look at that, Celestia. I think Arthur's taken a bit of a shine to your..."
"Student, Mr. Ratburn, and also my subject, though we share a pretty close relationship. Twilight Sparkle is her name."
Ratburn couldn't have broken the tension better himself as he stifled a laugh at the unicorn's absurd sounding name. He dared not offend the purple filly's teacher and have her upset with him.
"They...seem to be getting along quite nicely, don't you think?"
...and why would Ratburn ask something like that? Was he trying to suggest something between the two, or worse, correlating the two students' friendly conversation to Ratburn and Celestia's own? Perhaps she was being a bit single-minded about it. They seemed to be having a good time together over there, and he was probably just commenting on it passively.
"I suppose they are. It is a little surprising, as they were on opposite cheering sections the entire time, but that doesn't look like it has stopped them from...getting to know one another."
Oh lord, even Arthur and Twilight couldn't get their minds off of it. Innuendo floated humidly in the space between Celestia and her rival, resulting in Ratburn's nervous coughing fit. She almost wished she hadn't said anymore on the scene.
"I guess..." the rat turned back to her, "I should be getting Arthur back to his parents, and I need to go home and map out some lesson plans for class tomorrow."
Celestia vaguely remembered hearing about his teaching job at the local elementary school at one of the challenges. No real surprises there. If he was as heated about teaching as he was about cake, his students probably get a good mental workout from him.
"Yes...I should be heading back to Equestria soon as well. An entire country doesn't just run itself, you know."
"No...it sure doesn't..."
Was that some kind of wayward sigh that came out of Ratburn's mouth? He was turning away from her, intending to head off to his own student to take him home. As Celestia thought, Ratburn wasn't suave with goodbyes, though she couldn't blame him since she was the one letting him walk away from her without saying anything else in return. A niggling urge to call out to Ratburn as he became more distanced nearly throttled her, but she knew it would just make the uncomfortable scene even worse if she did. It was best to let him go back to his own life, and for her to go back to hers. As he did so, Celestia felt a tingle of disappointment, like she was losing the company of a friend or family member for a long time. Oh who was she trying to hide from? It was more than a small tingle...
Arthur had been in the middle of a conversation with his new friend when Ratburn called out for him to go.
"So you see, that's when Binky gave George another swirly, and..."
"Arthur, we need to get going, your parents will be worried if we stay out all night."
Twilight was having a good time hearing about all of the foolhardy, though interesting, misadventures Arthur and his buddies got into, but they whirled over to Ratburn the moment he called out to the aardvark, abruptly bringing this little chat to an end.
"Aw, come on Mr. Ratburn, I was just about to get to the good part of the story!"
Ratburn didn't want to be pushy, but he had to get out of there as fast as he could. The princess was one of those reasons, but the other was much more urgent. He whispered his need to void his bowels in a hopefully more pleasant way than it sounded, earning a knowing gasp from Arthur.
"OH...maybe we should get going then!"
Arthur turned to his new unicorn companion, unsure how to end their talk without seeming rude or putting her off. Before he could speak, Twilight gave him an understanding nod and spoke first.
"I know, you've gotta get going, don't you? It's okay, I had a great time meeting you, and you know where to find me if you're ever in Equestria..."
"...the tree-house library in...Ponyville right?" Arthur still had a hard time not busting a gut at the names of places Twilight had told him, all of which oddly complimented the world of ponies she had introduced him to, but he asked her with a straight face somehow.
"Yeah, that's the one! I should probably get going too, Princess Celestia has to get back for a meeting in the morning."
She held her hoof out for Arthur who grasped it, giving each other a parting gesture. Arthur gave her a mutual grin, demonstrating his own happiness at talking with her.
"I really liked meeting you too, Twilight. We should hang out again sometime if that's possible."
"Yeah...I would like that."
With a wave goodbye, Twilight made her way back over to the princess of the sun, who was observing the scene with some interest. Celestia seemed a little spaced out to Twilight, she was watching as Ratburn had dashed over to another stall before the two went back to their places of residence. However, she must have registered Twilight's existence enough to speak with her.
"Come Twilight, let's head back over to our seats and gather up Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie to depart."
Only a minute of silence was shared between the two until Twilight noticed that Celestia was constantly taking glances behind her and looking back to the front with an abashed half-frown on her face.
"So Princess, what did that Mr. Ratburn say to you while Arthur and I were talking?"
"Oh...well he was simply congratulating me for a job well done, as I also did with him."
Twilight could have sworn that the princess was avoiding eye contact with her as she was erratically clearing her windpipe and speaking with less poise than was typical for her.
"Hmm...that's odd, I thought you two were at each others throats during the tournament."
Celestia stood in place for a moment, trying to think of a legitimate excuse for their niceties, "Winning this competition is very important to both of us... Our tempers flare sometimes, but we always manage to keep the aftermath very professional...and civil..."
It sounded legitimate enough for Twilight, though it was still pretty weird that the princess and Ratburn were on such friendly terms after their near blowout earlier that day. Twilight inspected Celestia's face a little closer, to which the white mare's eyes shifted in her direction and briskly returned to their forward focus. She was definitely concerned about something that she wasn't divulging to her pupil, but what?
"...If you say so...Princess Celestia..."
Twilight wasn't letting this go, not by a long shot. However, Celestia didn't seem intent on spilling much about her troubles, so the unicorn would wait it out, for now. They had a few days or so before she, Dash, and Pinkie left for Ponyville again, and hopefully in that time, she'd get to the bottom of the predicament.
Arthur had been waiting outside the porter-john his sickly teacher invaded for almost ten minutes before Ratburn emerged, freeing a pungent stench from within.
"Ack...ugh...that's just gross, Mr. Ratburn!"
Ratburn readjusted his sweatpants and the sweatshirt he had donned after the temperature dropped later in the night.
"Arthur, if I could ever give you an important word to live by, never eat laxatives to cheat your way through an eating contest. I can hardly stand after that."
Ratburn motioned for Arthur to follow him back over to the site where Buster and Francine would also need to be brought home to their parents. As Arthur walked by him, the rat ended up having to hobble for reasons best left unexplained. Torn-out-rectum walk aside, there were other unusual things that Ratburn was doing. Arthur noticed interestedly that Ratburn was turning to longingly stare behind him every few seconds, seeming disappointed when he couldn't find what or who he was searching for.
"Hey Mr. Ratburn," Arthur began hesitantly, "what are you looking for?"
Ratburn's fleeting shocked look turned to a reassuring smile as he regarded Arthur, a smile that Arthur could tell wasn't genuine.
"Nothing Arthur, just wondering about a few things..."
Arthur ventured forth to uncover the reason behind his nervousness, "Did that um...Princess Celestia say something awful to you?"
The student noted mentally that Ratburn tensed at the mention of his pony rival.
"Whatever would make you think that, Arthur? We...fight all of the time. Nothing she could say or...do to me would be out of the ordinary..."
This made Arthur even more curious. Ratburn was fidgeting with the collar of his sweatshirt as if he were about to take it off. Wasn't he just freezing before the whole...kissing incident happened?
"Then do you mind if I ask what it is that's getting you all sweaty again, Mr. Ratburn?"
The rat gave his young companion an answer that Arthur always dreaded. It was the way that adults got out of telling him anything relevant to an issue, or important to him. It was a phrase that confirmed his fears.
"Arthur...you'll understand when you get older..."
He had to bite back his groan of indignation as the cursed words fell from Ratburn's anxiously pursing lips. If he didn't respect his teacher so much, he probably would've socked him in the mouth for giving him that cop out. He would never learn anything at the rate the adults in his life kept telling him that!
Oh well, he now knew that Ratburn was hiding something pretty big if he wasn't venting whatever had made him so jittery. He'd see him at school the next day, and could maybe make some feasible excuses to visit him at his residence. Somehow, he'd gather what it was that troubled the tight-lipped tutor one way or another.
Ratburn took a much longer shower that night than he usually would have. Hot water cascaded onto his slouched, tired back, releasing some unknown tension in his muscles. He stared at the white tile of his shower wall, not registering it as he continued to dwell on that uncanny scene at the contest table, traces of nausea assaulting his churning stomach.
He casually performed his nightly shower routine, unable to forget the embarrassed look on Celestia's face as the two pulled away from each other, her lips and chin drenched in chocolate, her mouth set in a slack, puzzled scrunch. It was adorable...
As the thought crossed his mind, he was grateful when a lather of shampoo he had used slid down toward his eyes, temporarily mitigating the stray, partially unwanted musing.
"OW...That really stings!" he wiped at his eyes and rinsed them furiously to keep the offending substance from entering his eyeballs, "I'm usually so careful with things like this!"
The pain was good though, for it had taken him away from the reemerging reality of his feelings, even if for a moment. Then again, his carelessness in the shower was only making him more aware of those pangs of...something...
Further motivated to get his mind on other issues, he partook in the rest of his shower, devising some inventive ways to get his class excited about the new topic they would be touching on in school tomorrow, Astronomy. For him, at least, it was a fascinating subject, uncovering the mysteries of space, and the impressive-sounding statistics he could give them on how far away the planets were from Earth. If there was ever an important anomaly to study, it would have to be the grandeur and wonders of the universe.
Clean and dripping from head to toe, Ratburn stepped out onto the floor mat and grabbed a large towel that he had hung on the railing above his bathtub, wrapping himself in it to dry the globules of water running down his body. He hummed to himself at the possibilities for class projects, and the massive mountain of homework he would be able to impose on them, only to hear their satisfying groans of complaint. Hey, in all of his years of teaching, Ratburn had discovered that once a teacher stops pushing their students to be the best they could be, they weren't working hard enough at their job. He remembered the relieved cheers he was given as his sister, Ms. "I'm going to be a tougher teacher than you'll ever be!", had all but bored his students to tears. Even Buster had exaggerated that his IQ had gone down at least 20 points when she substituted for him that day.
Dry, relaxed, and motivated to start anew in the morning, Ratburn began throwing his pajamas on. He stopped himself after his bottoms were over his legs. His gaze had been caught by the rat staring back at him in the mirror. He did have some slight bags under his eyes, and a minor sunburn on his face after the long, sunny day, but those weren't what was troubling him so. The beady, black eyes that quizzically frowned at him had to be relaying a message of some kind. As he acknowledged his reflection, it taunted him knowingly, as if it were saying, "So...what are you going to do about Celestia?..."
Shifting backward only slightly, he was perturbed by the burrowing, self-loathing sneer his other seemed to be giving him. More importantly, his own face was curled up the same way, and he had not realized the change. Could he really keep himself from thinking about the kiss, how it moved him, and how much he found himself wanting to experience it again?
"...I need to get some sleep..."
Ratburn stubbornly tore his gaze from the mirror in front of him, putting on the rest of his white and red striped pajamas with a little more force and speed than was necessary. When he was done with that, and after brushing his teeth, keeping his attention focused on something other than the mirror, he casually flipped off the bathroom light, bathing himself in its darkness. He huffed one more time in a held breath and made his way to his comfortable bed, where he would sleep like a log for the next two years if his body let him.
Luckily, a torrential thunderstorm had made its presence known in Elwood City just a few minutes before Ratburn had to be up for school. He bolted upright out of bed as a huge thunderclap ripped through the dark grey, cloudy sky. It must have been right overhead because the house shook with the power of it. Such a harsh awakening had left the poor rat exhausted and yearning for thirty more precious minutes of slumber. Once he looked at his alarm clock next to the bed, he sighed. It was indeed time for him to get ready, and make his way out the door to get poured on by the heavily descending rainwater.
By the time he had made his way through another shower, his breakfast, and getting suited up, the rains had dramatically died down to a drizzle, something the tired teacher was thankful for. He locked the front door, for what reason he didn't really know. Elwood City was rather peaceful, surprisingly, and a robbery was a rare find. Still, he had some belongings that he might miss if they were to be confiscated by some rough-necked charlatan.
He made his way to his steel grey vehicle, the Honda of which the back seat had been the site of his many indulgences in his cake fetish. It wasn't the greatest ride in the world, but it was his, and it was affordable for the horribly low income he was allowed as an elementary school teacher. He was, in fact, still making payments on it, which also wasn't much of a shock given his monetary situation.
He jumped in after he opened the hatch, and slammed it shut so that the "door ajar" light wouldn't blare in his face like it sometimes did if he closed it too lightly. He was only slightly wet, thanks to the casual spray, and listened for a moment as the tiny drops peppered his windshield. He turned the key in the ignition and waited for oncoming traffic before veering out into the street for the short trip to Lakewood Elementary.
A rush of traffic was a typical greeting on sunnier days, and Ratburn was thankful that not very many people were out because of the decent rainfall they were getting a while ago. He used the lazy drive to think about the night before, his mind fresher after the substantial amount of sleep.
He had started coming to terms with the fact that the longer he tried to ignore his kiss with Celestia, and let the feelings bottle up inside him, the more earnest he would be to reach out to her again. He had a pointed history with the princess, one that twenty years of competitive spirit had given time to slowly cultivate. They were never anything other than enemies for their ICEC careers, but in some ways that was all just bells and whistles installed by the rabid fans that would worship the ground both battlers walked on.
Sure, to them, it was also a war, for their love of cake, and the pride associated with victory. However, Ratburn, at least, couldn't ever bring himself to truly HATE the sun goddess. Maybe at one point of his life he truly detested her, but as time went on, that annoyance had become more and more sparse, devolving into something akin to a desire to conquer, but not necessarily destroy. "For what?" would be the next question. Was it to conquer the ICEC? Was it to dominate all of his opponents for some hyper-masculine, tribal sense of superiority? Could it be to conquer...her...not just in competition, but to somehow leave an impression great enough to win her affection?
Ratburn almost beamed the car in front of him as they came to a red light, caught up in the momentary shock of possible epiphany. Unfortunately, that last thought wasn't out of the realm of feasibility. At every challenge, he reveled in her hard, sharp leers as he tore her love of cake apart by putting his on a pedestal. Hers was the face he would always search first for signs of acknowledgement of his triumphs, whether surprised gasps or stares of death. Her attention was worth more to him than the tons of bowing fools who would drool at the prospect of gaining his autograph. It sent tingles down his spine to have her feel anything because of him...and now he was starting to figure out why.
"Whoo...let's turn up the A/C for a minute..."
It didn't take too much longer after the red light for Ratburn to pull up into his designated parking spot, right up front in the parking lot where he wouldn't have to walk very far to the double doors of the school. Stepping out of his Honda, Ratburn basked in the light spritzes still leaking from the clouds above them, feeling rather warm after mulling over the implications of his thought train.
Children could be seen sprinting for the shelter of the school building, trying not to mess up their hairdos, clothes, or backpacks. Ratburn, however, took his sweet time in the rain. Once inside, he wouldn't have the cool droplets to extinguish the heated fancies rolling over in his mind.
As he opened the door to his classroom, fashionably late to intimidate the students or get their hopes up that he wouldn't be there, only to crush those hopes, he gave a cheerful, yet somehow hollow sounding, greeting.
"Good morning class!"
On cue, and poorly out of synchronization, the students groaned their disapproval, wishing he had just been sick today.
"Uuuuugh...good morning, Mr. Ratburn..."
He dropped his briefcase on the teacher's desk in front of him, making a pointed thud on the hard wood, and clicked the shiny, black contraption open.
"Have I got a wonderful day lined up for all of you! Today, we will be studying a mysterious, vast landscape, dotted with millions of tiny white lights, where natural forces collide to create all matter and life as we know it, the universe!"
The children were less than uninterested as they stared back, ready to take notes on anything and everything Ratburn uttered, which would no doubt be added to their exams. Their teacher subtly made a frown as his energetic opening statement was cast off like a dirty robe, but rifled through his case for a pencil to continue.
"Now then everyone, please get out your science textbooks and turn to page...oops," Ratburn's pencil had slipped from his grasp, making a clink on the waxed floor. A giggling hum escaped him at his momentary clumsiness as he bent down to pick up the writing utensil. Unfortunately, he had forgotten to gauge his ascent to his feet and hit his head on the protruding side of the table harshly. He didn't swear, miraculously, but yelped in pain nonetheless, stroking the throbbing area of his scalp.
"Psst..." Arthur was sitting in the second column to their left, in the second row, hissing to get Francine's attention on his right.
"What?" She leaned in to hear what he would whisper.
"...Doesn't Ratburn seem to be acting a little...goofy today?"
"When is he not "goofy", Arthur?"
Arthur shifted a little to get closer to her, hoping Ratburn wouldn't hear them talking.
"No, I mean, something's obviously distracting him. What do you think it is?"
Francine was getting a little annoyed at Arthur's need to be nosy about everything, as he got this way all of the time, but kept her voice level and quiet.
"How should I know? Maybe he's got something going on later today and just wants to get class over with."
His brow scrunched at Francine's dubious words.
"Ratburn would never want to have class end quicker. He practically lives here!"
"Arthur, please keep the chatter down, thank you!"
Ratburn didn't hear in on the conversation, but Arthur was visiting with Francine in the middle of his lecture, and that was something he would never tolerate in his classroom. Arthur apologized and slunk back down into the uncomfortable desk-chair, giving Ratburn his heavily divided attention.
An eloquently phrased, yet boring as all hell, ten-minute lecture proceeded the actual material, Ratburn throwing out some cheesy astronomy jokes to lighten the mood every so often. He would grumble under his breath slightly when the eyes and mouths of his class didn't partake in the humor, continuing on dryly.
At one point in the lecture, Binky, once again, had to take a short bathroom break, and by short, I mean he wanted out of this bogus lecture badly! He was famous with Ratburn for such breaks, and the rat would sternly warn him that if he took all day and lit another cherry bomb in the toilet again, he would be calling his parents and the police. Binky, as usual, would wave off such threats. It was an adventure, every time he went to the bathroom, because no one knew how long he would take, and worse, would he gas the school out with his posterior aroma or demolish another porcelain throne with an M-80 he smuggled into the building?
About five minutes later, Ratburn and the entire class were baffled that Binky had actually come back to his seat for once. Maybe his parents had been called one too many times, and had punished him or something. Whatever the case, it was an eerily pleasant turnout for the green-suited teacher. Binky shuffled back in just in time to start the actual astronomy lecture for the day.
Arthur had been trying to watch Ratburn and listen to his lectures to see what was still bothering him. He just looked like there was something on his mind that he couldn't articulate to his students, or himself for that matter. His eyes, while giving off an optimistic energy for this exciting topic, held a far-off stare, as if his mind wasn't on the subject at hand.
His musings were further solidified as the disengaged mentor, drawing a pseudo-map of their solar system starting with the sun, had started drawing off course, making something that looked more like a picture than the rings used to represent the trajectories of the planets.
"So it is plain to see then class," Ratburn was still orating normally enough, but the words must have been separated from his mental processes, "the sun, sitting at the center of our solar system, is a crucial celestial body to the life and health of every living thing on Earth."
Being pushed up against the chalkboard, clicking away feverishly at the black screen, Ratburn was certain that every detail of his solar system had been perfect. However, Prunella had spoke up after he had stopped. Why did all the noise from movement and whispering students stop all of a sudden?
"...Um...Mr. Ratburn?..."
"Yes Prunella, did you have a question?" Ratburn rotated around to address his curious pupil.
"...What are you drawing right now?"
Ratburn's brow furrowed, puzzled by the question that, had he drawn everything right, should've been obvious.
"Why Prunella, as I was going over, this is a picture of the solar system," he slowly turned in place in front of his teacher's desk, "and the planets that rotate arou...GHAAHAA!"
With a more distanced perspective of his masterpiece, Ratburn almost saw the end of the world, and his life flashing before his eyes. He flew back at least a foot or two, beholding the fruits of his subconscious thoughts.
"EH HEH HEH HEH!" Binky started laughing exaggeratedly at the picture Ratburn drew, "What is that Mr. Ratburn? It looks like some kind of POOOOOONY!"
As the troublemaker pounded his fist on his desk, screaming with immature mirth, the other kids in their seats had mixed reactions.
"What the...?"
"Will this be on the test?"
"That's actually a really good sketch, he's quite the artist!"
No one was more aware of the implications here than Arthur Read. The picture Ratburn had drawn was undeniable, and so exquisitely detailed that there was no doubt who that pony was...
He had drawn Princess Celestia! As an added bonus, the sun was exactly where her cutie mark should've been.
"Oh goodness..." Ratburn mumbled to himself with panic, "...what...how did I...I'm never going to live this down..." He hoisted himself back up from his dumbfounded sitting position in order to erase the incriminating chalk-work hurriedly. Once done, he cleared his throat in embarrassment, hoping that no one would remember that screw up. Then again, no one here even knew about the princess, and therefore he would just have to go on pretending to his students that this scene was simply the product of lack of sleep and intense preparation.
"I knew it," Arthur clicked his fingers together under his seat to avoid a suspicious glare from the frazzled instructor, "It DOES have something to do with that Princess Celestia pony!"
The rest of the day had been highly uneventful. Ratburn went over a myriad of other subjects just as boring as the astronomy lecture, though with just as much spirit and, unfortunately, tons of homework due the next class period. Arthur stepped out of the school's double doors as excited to be out of there as his other classmates were. He spotted Buster and Francine on his way out, giving them a hand up and a shout to get their attention.
"Hey Buster, Francine! You guys headed home?"
Buster put his head down and sighed a little, "Yeah, I've gotta go to the PTA meeting with my mom later in the evening, and she wants me there to help with some chores."
"Yep," Francine nonchalantly replied, "me and my dad are going to the batting cages today."
"Oh," Arthur looked pretty disappointed, "I've got a free schedule today, but I guess I can find something else to do."
The three friends made their way down the concrete path. A comfortable silence fell between them for a moment before Arthur made an observation.
"So, you guys saw what I saw back in class today, right? Ratburn drew that...Princess Celestia pony! Doesn't that make you suspicious?"
Buster's hand went to his chin as he tossed the situation around in his head, "Hmm...maybe he's exhausted from the competition and is still angry about the judges' decision."
Arthur wasn't completely convinced about that. Ratburn seemed to take the ruling pretty well after the fallout in the stands was abated, though it could've been because he was tired...
"I think Ratburn just has a one track mind about everything, especially that ICEC, and is probably planning his tactics for next year already." Francine reasoned, looking pensively up into the sky.
Oh, Arthur didn't doubt that the rat had a one track mind, however, he didn't think it was just because of the challenge. His handiwork was so finely detailed that he must've been thinking about her a lot more than just once since last night.
"Look guys," Arthur motioned to his two friends to listen to him, "I talked with Ratburn a little bit last night, and he kept looking behind himself, where that princess was sitting, every few seconds! You remember that they were kissing up on stage, right? Well, I think it somehow affected him more than we think."
Buster and Francine shared a stunned look, only to bust out giggling. Francine patted Arthur on the shoulder.
"Oh Arthur, Ratburn's a...well...rat, and that princess is a pony! They aren't even of the same species! Have you been watching too much of that "Space Track" series again?"
The aardvark wasn't too happy that the two were shrugging this whole thing off. "I'm serious guys! You saw how weird he was acting in class! There has to be something more to this!"
As with most of Arthur's paranoid claims, Buster and Francine just reasoned everything off and told the jittery boy to loosen up and not think about it so much. The trip to their houses became quiet again, and Arthur was still a little tense, but his friends seemed to have just cast the thoughts aside.
"Well, see you tomorrow guys, here's my stop." Francine waved to the the rabbit and pondering aardvark, who reciprocated the gesture.
The two kept on walking until Buster's house came up.
"See ya at school tomorrow, Arthur!"
"Yeah...later..."
He tried to give his bubbly friend a nice goodbye, but the events from last night and today just kept rewinding and playing again in his head. Ratburn kissing Celestia, and then the soulful looks in her direction, and the distant gazes in class; the picture...
Arthur approached his own house on the lonely journey, determination crossing his features as he walked up to the front door.
"I've gotta keep a sharp eye on Ratburn. He's trying to hide these...feelings, but he's not doing a very good job, and I'm going to get to the bottom of this, once and for all."