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Chapter Four

I trusted you

"You look wonderful"

"I look pink"

"You say it like it's a bad thing! What's wrong with pink?"

I couldn't believe she was even asking me this question.

"It's pink"

Alice smiled at me as I looked at myself in the mirror. I had almost forgotten what I looked like. The last time that I had really looked at my reflection had been when I was human and the memory of that day was not very clear. Like it had been a dream.

"It'll grow on you, trust me" she replied as she turned to find something else for me to try on. Three hours had passed since she had first started. "Besides its a lot better then that dress that you were wearing before"

As she said this my eyes seemed to be drawn to my old blue dress that was laying across her bed. It looked so out of place there, just as I was in this house. As much as I disliked the pink dress I was wearing it shocked me to see how different I looked, my hair had been washed and brushed and I was clean to any blood that had been sprayed across my skin. It I had not been so pale and my eyes were not red…there I would of looked…normal.

Remembering something that Riley had told me about the Cullens a thought came into my mind.

"Alice?"

"Yes?"

"Why are your eyes that colour and not red?"

"it's the effect that the animal bloody has on us, rather useful really. It helps us to fit in with the humans more" she laughed slightly as she handed me another dress, it was green this time. "Humans freak out if they seem someone with red eyes"

"Really? I normally kill humans before they get a chance to look at me"

Alice froze and I knew that I had said something wrong, not wanting to make her feel bad I changed the subject.

"So are my eyes going to o yellow as well?"

"With time. But you have to understand, just because your eyes will be different it doesn't mean that you'll be able to go near humans. In fact I don't think your going to be able to go near humans while we're still in Forks. Its going to take a lot longer then that"

"…This is going to be really hard, isn't it?"

Before Alice could answer the door downstairs opened and we both turned towards the sound. My body tensed slightly before I realised it was only Carlise. I knew I was going to have to let my guard down a bit but it was harder then I would of thought.

We listened to him greet everyone before Alice took my hand and silently led me down the stairs.

"Will he be alright?" I heard Esme ask.

When I saw Esme and Carlise I knew something was wrong. She looked too sad and I could see the worry on Carlise face, I never thought I would say this about a vampire but he looked tired.

"He'll be fine, he was healing before I even arrived-"

"Carlise" Jasper muttered as he caught sight of me. I smiled slightly and tried to act like I had heard nothing, I understood that there were some secrets that they were not ready to tell me yet.

"Bree" Carlise greeted as he put down his black bag "I see Alice has gotten hold of you already. You look lovely"

It was at times like this that I was grateful I could no longer blush., everyone in the room had turned to look at me and I tensed. I had never liked it when people paid me too much attention, it made me feel exposed.

"Yeah" I muttered.

"Come on Bree" I almost jumped when I felt her hand on my lower back but I managed to stop myself, I was going to have to get used to how comfortable they were around one another "There are still some dress's I want to see you in"

With out another word I followed her up the stairs and tried not to think about what I had just heard, a part of me wanted to trust the Cullens but it was hard when I knew that they were keeping something from me.

Everything smelled so much cleaner here. The trees and grass smelled better. As I laid in the garden I almost laughed at how sort if felt against my hard skin. Forks was not a sunny place and so there was no sun today and no light from my skin, just a slight warmth that made me smile. I liked being here and even though I did not like to think about I wondered how long this could last.

If those people did not come back and kill me then I knew that my blood lust would become too much for me and I would end up killing more humans. Knowing that I would kill someone did not bother me but knowing how much I would disappoint the Cullens did. They had welcomed me when they had no reason to and even thought I did not understand their reasons I was thankful.

There was movement in the house and I could tell from the almost silent footsteps that it was Edward, going to see Bella again. She had no been round since I had been here and I felt oddly guiltily that I was keeping her away from her second family. They were meant more to her then they did to me.

"Edward" I only whispered his name, but he would of heard me.

Less then two second later he was standing over me, a frown on his face.

"Are you alright Bree? Are you hungry then I am sure that Jasper-"

"No" I said with a small laugh as I sat up "Its nothing like that. He took me out last night…he's been very kind" And he had been, Jasper still did not trust me and I could not blame him, to him I may never stop being him enemy, another reason why I did not fit in here. "I wanted to, well, say that I'm sorry"

With one look into my mind his face relaxed and he smiled at me.

"Your not any problem Bree. I think its best if Bella stays away for a while. It keeps her safe and it will make things easier for you in the long run. Being around normal blood is hard enough but Bella…"

My throat burned as I remembered her smell, he was right. Her blood was unlike anything I hard ever smelled. I would kill her within seconds. And I wouldn't of even cared.

"Sorry" I muttered as he tensed, he had seen what I had thought. "I can't help myself"

He nodded and sighed, giving me a small pitying look.

"I know. That's why we are going to help you"

And I believed him.

Being betrayed by someone you trust can sometimes leave you with a few emotions scars. But being killed by someone you trusted always will. In the last few years of my human life only a handful of people had shown me any kindness, so when Riley had come to me I had never thought that my life had been in danger.

There was something that seemed to pull me to him, I can even remember thinking about how beautiful he looked.

I was stupid and weak.

Not once did I wonder why he was so pale, or think about how odd it was that he wore sunglasses at night. Even when he smiled at me and showed me his teeth I still held onto his hand and willing followed him to my death. Or my rebirth. I wasn't sure what to call being a vampire anymore.

Carlise had told me that most new borns never lived passed the first year and the more time I spent as a vampire the more I understood why. In some ways it was a lot like being human: there were so many ways you could die.

We are going to start moving forward in the next chapter so et ready for the story to unfold people! And please remember about the five reviews! I hate doing this but I really need them to make me happy right now!