Still suffering from my awful writer's block, but I'm just going to force myself to write this, and hopefully in the end it will turn out okay. Fingers crossed.

James's POV

For the longest time, all I can do is stare at my phone as my blood runs cold. My eyes sting with unshed tears, my entire body shaking. I can't seem to get enough air. Logan called. Logan. And then he screamed, and everything went silent. What if he's…dead? Or hurt? I just feel so helpless. I have no idea what happened to him. With a heavy sigh, I sit down at the edge of my bed, having literally fallen out of bed the second I saw the call was from Logan. And I almost didn't answer my phone. What if I hadn't? What would Logan have done, all alone and scared? My body aches with uncontrollable sadness, panic creeping into my chest. He screamed. He screamed.

"Oh, god…" I whisper, tugging at my hair, my phone resting heavily in my lap. Maybe he just ended the call because he needed to get away. Maybe he's okay, and not hurt, and he'll call me again once he's safe. But I can feel in my heart that he's not okay. The way he screamed, and the thump I heard before everything cut off, it was more than just him hanging up. I close my eyes shut tightly, trying hard not to start hyperventilating. I should have told him just how much I love him, and miss him. I should have said so much more than just "I'm here. I'm always here." I'm not there for him. I have no idea where he is.

It occurs to me suddenly that Kendall and Carlos would probably like to hear this new piece of information. After what happened last time I kept a secret from them, I decide it's better to tell them right away. It doesn't matter that it's only five in the morning, or that I'm a shaky mess at the moment. They need to know, and I need someone, anyone, to tell me that everything's going to be okay. Just this once, I need them to trick me into thinking Logan will be alright. I need them to tell me he's okay, or I just might go insane.

I can't seem to move fast enough, my legs tangling as I jump to my feet. With a dull thud, I fall to the floor face-first, groaning at the pain that explodes on my jaw bone. I push myself up quickly, stumbling out my bedroom door. I make my way easily down the hallway, bursting into Kendall and Carlos's room without even bothering to knock. They won't mind when I tell them the reason for my rudeness, anyway. I freeze at the foot of Carlos's bed, realizing that Kendall is not in his bed. Instead, he's lying beside Carlos, his arms wrapped loosely around his torso. I just stand there and stare at them for a moment before shaking my head to clear my thoughts. I'm sure it's nothing. Kendall was probably just comforting Carlos last night after we went to bed, and he must have fallen asleep while doing so. I mean, it's not like they have a thing for each other…right? No. I shake my head again, frowning at myself for even thinking something so ridiculous.

"You guys, wake up, wake up!" I blurt out, my phone held tightly in my right hand. I shake them for good measure, probably using a bit more force than necessary in my haste to get them to wake up. Kendall stirs first, his eyes slowly fluttering open as he lets out a soft yawn. He blinks up at me, silent for a moment, and then he looks to his right and sees Carlos, and his cheeks flush a bright red. He quickly scoots away, averting his eyes.

"I was just…um…" he mumbles, and I roll my eyes.

"I know what you were doing," I tell him, and he looks surprised, his cheeks seeming to get even redder. "Why are you looking at me like that? So what if you were comforting Carlos last night? I know he was really upset."

"I-"

"Logan called me," I blurt out, my heart pounding, and Kendall blinks in surprise, and then looks confused.

"What?" he asks, just as Carlos begins to stir. "Because it sounded like you said-"

"You heard me," I say, cutting him off. "Logan called, and he was so scared, Kendall. All I know is that he had managed to lock his kidnapper in a bedroom, and then he was trying to get away and there was a loud bang and he screamed, and then everything went silent." My throat feels tight, and I choke on the last word, my eyes watering. Kendall just stares for a moment, unsure of what to say. Carlos, however, had heard everything as he was awaking, and his eyes go wide, his breath catching in his throat.

"Logan?" he says softly, and then he turns his head and buries his face in Kendall's shoulder, his shoulders shaking gently. I can't tell if he's crying or not, but either way he's upset. Kendall rubs his back awkwardly, avoiding my gaze.

"I don't know what to do," I mutter, running a hand through my hair. I turn and start pacing, my heart still racing. "I just don't know. What can I do? Why can't I save him?"

"James, this isn't your fault," Kendall says softly, but I ignore him, continuing my pacing.

"He's counting on me. He's waiting for me to save him, and I just can't."

"James."

"What if he's hurt? He's dead, I just know it. It's all my fault. I've failed him."

"James!" Kendall practically screams, hopping out of bed and grabbing me by the shoulders. "Snap out of it!" And then he slaps me, hard, a loud smacking sound echoing around the room. "Sit down and just get a hold of yourself, okay?" Without waiting for me to say anything, he pushes me down onto the bed, and I curl up next to Carlos, refusing to let my tears fall. I remember what Katie said, about crying meaning acceptance. I won't accept this. I won't believe it's true, not this time. Logan's okay. He's fine. I'm going to wake up and this whole thing will have been one huge nightmare, and I'll be able to wrap Logan in my arms and tell him I love him and stop feeling this pain in my chest. I close my eyes, willing myself to wake up. This can't be real. It just can't.

"Please wake up," I whisper to myself. "Please, please, please wake up."

"You're not dreaming, James," Kendall says softly, and my eyes snap open, meeting his.

"You're not really here," I mumble, trying to convince myself. "I'm dreaming. I'm just dreaming, and you two are demons who look like my friends, taking over my dreams and turning them into nightmares. Yeah, that's it. This is a nightmare. I'm dreaming." Kendall frowns, and then glances over at Carlos, who nods. Without warning, I'm being lifted into the air and carried off the bed. Kendall and Carlos carry me out the door and down the hall to the upstairs bathroom, setting me down in the shower.

"This is for your own good, James," Kendall says, and then he turns the water on, the icy cold liquid making me jump. I blink the water out of my eyes, and then I'm crying, my whole body slumping in defeat. This isn't a dream. It's all real, every bit of it, and I hate it. I wish so badly that I could just take Logan's place. Anything is better than going through this pain. And then I feel guilty, because taking Logan's place would mean he would have to be the one to suffer and miss me, and I wouldn't wish this on anyone, especially not him.

"Better now?" Carlos asks gently, and I look up at him, shivering from the cold water pouring down on me. And no, I don' feel better at all. In fact, I feel worse, but I can't let him know just how miserable I am. They've suffered enough.

"Much better," I lie, easily forcing a smile. "Now can you turn the water off before I get hypothermia?" Carlos chuckles a bit, turning off the water and stepping back to let me out of the shower. Kendall hands me a towel, and I wrap it around myself, shaking water from my hair.

"Woah there, Fido," Kendall jokes as he's showered with water droplets, and I smile slightly, and this time the action is only partially forced.

"Sorry," I mutter, pulling the towel closer to myself. "I'm going to go get changed." I leave without another word, walking quickly back to my bedroom. I'm a bit disappointed. Telling Kendall and Carlos about the phone call gave me little comfort, and now I have no idea what to do. I briefly consider calling the police, but what can they do? It's not like I can just call back and have them trace the call, seeing as Logan won't be able to answer, and his kidnapper wouldn't be dumb enough to take the chance and answer it. I'm so hopelessly stuck.

I peel off my clothes, flinging them into a random corner of the room before pulling on a clean pair of jeans and a t-shirt. The sun is just starting to rise, illuminating my room with a pale golden glow. Logan always loved watching the sun rise. He said it was a magical time of day, everything waking up and coming to life. To me, it's just another part of life. The sun rises, and then it sets, and then the process is repeated the next day. It's nothing special, just a part of life. But perhaps that's why Logan likes sunrises so much; they're a sign that life goes on. I slowly walk to the window, looking up towards the sky, awaiting the rising of the sun. I feel connected to him in this moment, watching as another day begins. For some, it's the start of a new beginning. For others, the end of this life. But for me, in this moment, it's a reminder that no matter what happens, the world will keep on spinning, and that's enough to bring me some comfort. I can only hope that Logan has lived to see another day, and that wherever he is, he knows that I'll never give up on him, not again. I won't sit around here and feel sorry for myself. I won't give up the rest of my life. I'll keep on going, day by day, following the path of the sun.

Taking a deep breath, I make my wait out of the room and downstairs, walking past Kendall and Carlos on the couch. They look up in surprise as I walk past, their gaze following me until I'm at the front door, my fingers just inches away from the doorknob.

"Where are you going?" Kendall asks, and I turn my head to look at him.

"Out," I reply simply, once again attempting to turn the doorknob and exit the apartment.

"Wait, wait, wait," Kendall says in disbelief, getting up and walking over to me, Carlos trailing behind. "You're going out? You?" I nod, and Kendall opens his mouth slightly, trying to think of something else to say.

"Can we come with?" Carlos asks, and I shake my head.

"Sorry, Carlitos," I say, opening the door. "Not today." And really, I wouldn't mind all that much if they came along, but I just feel like I need to do this on my own. I need to find Logan, one way or another, and the only way I can do that is if I go out and look for him myself. The police obviously aren't having any luck.

"Alright…" he says reluctantly, and then I'm gone, not even bothering to close the door behind me,. I can feel Kendall's and Carlos's eyes on the back of my head, watching me go, and all I can do is keep going, rising up and following in the footsteps of the sun.

Alright, so that wasn't awful. I'm actually pretty happy with this chapter, and now I know exactly how I'm going to write the rest of the story. I've got the whole thing planned out in my head.