Nikki watched Harry walk slowly towards the main doors of the hospital, his body hunched against the cold. He was like a ghost to her lately, his eyes had lost a light, a spark and were filled with sadness. All she wanted to do was hold him, somehow revive him. She wanted to crawl all over his body and breathe life into him, show him what he had been missing all these years. Every quick awkward fumble would pale in comparison to how she would make love to him. But right now he needed a friend. She was his friend. His very best friend. Nikki hung her head. She shouldn't be thinking of Harry as anything more. Not right now. He was so very vulnerable. She recalled Leo's comments about time from the hotel room in Budapest and released a sigh of frustration she didn't realise she was holding. She saw her breath in the air and realised how cold it was. Then she remembered how cold Harry had been. Poor Harry…shaking like that in her arms…she had wanted to strip them both bare and hold him under the shower in the locker room. Nikki turned the key in the ignition and turned the heating on full blast. She resolved to stay and take care of Harry - Leo would understand surely. She may not be able to strip him off and warm him up the exactly way she wanted but she could make sure he ate properly and had someone to hold his hand. When her phone buzzed three hours later Nikki was in Harry's mother's kitchen peeling potatoes.

"Where is my carriage? H"

"En route Sire" she responded. Nikki set a match to the coal fire before she went out the door and placed a bottle of red wine on the fireplace to warm it up. God how clichéd is this she wondered. Open fire and alcohol. Harry will think I'm trying to seduce not comfort him.

As he sat into Nikki's car twenty minutes later Harry told her he had never been so happy to see her. He told her the nasty details of his mum's illness, how she looked, how she had asked for her. How she was mortified she hadn't had the windows cleaned.

The smell of cooking hit Harry when he entered the house and he felt his heart would burst when Nikki placed a hand on his chest to push past him down the hall to sprint to the kitchen.

"Oh the potatoes!" she exclaimed. Harry followed her into the kitchen bemused.

The usually pristine kitchen was a mess with pots and pans and the peelings of various vegetables scattered around the granite worktops.

"You alright Nigella?"

"Phew they're okay!" Nikki sighed, sticking a fork into a potatoe which by some miracle had been cooked to perfection.

"Oh thank god, and the house is still standing too which is a bonus" he said turning down the hob. Nikki giggled and rested her forehead on Harry's shoulder "I'm such an idiot, I never even thought….I just wanted to make you a nice dinner….can we strike this up to just another blonde moment please".

He frowned at her "alright missy but that's your quota for the day".

"Don't go into the living room then….I may have neglected to put a fireguard on the fire".

"Oh Doctor Alexander" he uttered in mock horror. Nikki hoped he didn't notice her biting her lip when he called her that, warmth pooling in her belly, her pupils dilating.

He placed the fireguard in front of the fire which was now ablaze and crackling loudly and retrieved the bottle of merlot she had set down nearby.

"Your attempts at transformation into domestic goddess are to be commended anyway Nikki" it smells great" Harry said as he screwed the bottle open and poured her a glass.

"Your mum's kitchen inspired me, its wonderful, see all along I was just missing the right equipment…the right setting"

"Ah a bad workman always blames his tools" Harry said before taking a large gulp and winking at her. He relished the hot burning sensation the liquid carried from his throat to his stomach. His shoulders relaxed and he felt them ache. The knots in his neck and shoulders twisted, his whole body was screaming.

"Hey you haven't even tasted it yet" Nikki pouted

"And what is it exactly?" Harry asked peering over her shoulder as she squinted into the oven before opening the doors. A blast of heat hit them in the face.

"Chicken casserole" she announced proudly "I just need you to mash the potatoes".

She stood in front of him with oven gloves wrapped around her hands blowing a wayward piece of hair out of her eyes. He couldn't help it, couldn't resist, he reached out and took the golden tendril in his fingers and smoothed it away. Harry was happy there for a moment in his mother's warm kitchen. Enjoying the easy domesticity between them. His mind began racing again, he couldn't stop it. In his mind's eye he was saying "Are the kids asleep?… good" and he would move his hands from her hair to her hips, gently moving her backwards towards the table. She would press against him, nuzzle into him. He could feel the fullness of her breasts squished against his chest and would smile that little smile when she felt him pressing against her stomach..

They both jumped as the lid fell off the saucepan of potatoes. Harry snapped out of his reverie and quickly excused himself before heading to the bathroom. Nikki shook her head quickly and blinked. Had she imagined that? Wished that? Had Harry looked at her with desire in his eyes?. Nikki took a gulp of wine and told herself to get a grip - Harry was in no fit state to desire anything except food and sleep.

Harry stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror before splashing his face with cold water. He shuddered and instantly felt goose pimples form on his skin. She is your friend he told himself. Your very very good friend. Like a sister. Your best friend. If you fuck this up and ruin that your life will not be worth living. There would be absolutely no point. Had he imagined that though? Her moving into his embrace as he moved her hair away…he had to have had. He was reading too much into things…it was like time had slowed down…he was seeking meaning in meaningless actions, meaningless moments…wasn't he?. Harry threw his head back as he swallowed two pills with a gulp of wine. Perscription drugs and alcohol. Jesus, Nikki is not safe at all.

Nikki was making an attempt to mash the potatoes when Harry returned. He placed his hand on her arm "Move aside weakling. This is man's work". Nikki giggled and Harry began mashing a little harder than intended. His body was out of control, like a bloody 15 year old. That little giggle went straight to his groin and he turned his body away from her, annoyed with himself. It must be grief it has to be a reaction to grief….

"While you're finishing that I'm just going to have a quick shower okay? I feel horrible after the travelling and cooking and everything".

"Course Nikki I'm sorry - I haven't even shown you where everything is"

"Its alright I had a good nose while you were in the hospital" she joked "your room is very cute"

"Cute?"

"Its like a shrine to you, your mum loves you very much…wants to remember you as 15 year old obviously before you became all grown up and doctory..nice wallpaper by the way".

Harry laughed "The 15 year old me would never have believed a woman like you would be in his room admiring the wallpaper".

"A woman like me?" she dared, her heart rate increasing.

Harry smacked her with a dishtowel…he wasn't ready for this…."Stop fishing for compliments you" he said lightheartedly before turning his attention back to the potatoes.

Nikki sighed inwardly and made her way to the bathroom. While Harry had been to the hospital she had braved an expedition to Marks & Spencer to buy herself a dressing gown, some spare clothes and other essentials. When she left her flat for work this morning she had no idea she'd be spending the night in Harry's home place. Nikki removed her boots and slipped the wool dress over her head. Stepping into the shower she closed her eyes and let the steam rise around her. She washed her hair and body and as she reached for the towel she suddenly realised she had left her bag with all her new clothes and dressing gown in the car. She wrapped the towel around herself and padded down the hall. Nikki could hear Harry in the living room, throwing more coal on the fire.

"Could you get my bags from the car please Harry?" she asked quietly, keeping her tone light.

The sound of her voice startled him and she apologised quickly "Sorry I didn't mean to frighten you".

He turned to her armed with a retaliatory quip but found himself unable to speak when his eyes landed on her. The only light was the glow from the fire which made beads of gold on the droplets of water on her pale skin. Her hair was damp and strands of it clung to her face. She watched him closely, utterly conscious of every dart his eyes made. They travelled down her hair to her eyes, her lips, her neck, her shoulders, the curve of her breasts, he swallowed loudly as he tracked a droplet of water travel down her breast bone between the top of her breasts. It disappeared beneath the towel. Harry remained on his knees, the coal bucket gripped in his hand. He couldn't speak and couldn't move and could not tear his eyes away.

Nikki too was all too aware of the shift in the atmosphere between them and her lips parted as she watched him watching her. Harry put the bucket down and moved towards her, the air was buzzing with electricity between them. He coughed "Your bags?, no problem, I notice that's plural, am I never to be rid of you then?" his voice sounded strange to him like it was someone elses. Someone far away. He never removed his eyes from her and was utterly shameless about drinking in the sight of her.

"Never" she whispered and there was silence between them for what seemed like an eternity, neither wanting to break eye contact.

Harry's fingertips began to trace a path down her cheeks, across her lips and chin, down her neck, shoulder, then collarbone. He tapped her collarbone gently "you are so so beautiful".

Nikki could barely breathe, was afraid to move, his fingers had traced a path of fire on her skin and she had never experienced anything so erotic in her life. No man had made her feel like this. The blood thumped in her ears as she felt her body respond to Harry's touch. Her lips became fuller, her nipples hardened and she felt moisture begin to pool between her legs.

Nikki was still holding the towel around her with both hands clasped together. Harry placed his hands over hers, never breaking her gaze. Slowly….very slowly they moved the towel away and let it fall. Harry closed his eyes and opened them again to ensure this was real. She was still there when he opened his eyes, his body trembling with need for her, his erection pressed painfully against his jeans. God he needed her like he had never needed anyone in his entire life. His fingers made their way down the tops of her arms and brushed the curve of her breasts. Nikki drew a sharp intake of breath as he took her by surprise and began rolling her nipples between his rough fingers. She closed her eyes. Jesus she was so close already. Harry gently kneaded her breasts in his hands, feeling their fullness between his fingers. He dropped his head to roll his tounge around the areola of her left breast, deliberately avoiding the nipple. Nikki was almost to the point of begging when Harry took the hardened nipple in his mouth and gently sucked. She let out an involuntary cry which almost caused Harry to come there and then. No he thought quickly. This is about her. Harry realised at that moment it was the first time that he was not a selfish lover. This woman, he thought, this woman deserves to be worshipped. He removed his mouth from her breast and began slowly making his way down her body, his large hands ran down her thighs to her ankles and then back tracked, gripping her calves, travelling over her thighs before resting on her buttocks. Nikki entwined her fingers in Harry's hair urging him on. His lips grazed her navel before he rested them on the soft curls between her legs "Harry" she breathed as his tounge darted between her wet folds. This was his new favorite taste he decided as he worshipped her with his mouth. The tip of his tounge teased her entrance before sliding back up between her folds, she bucked against him when he flattened his tounge and licked softly at her clit. Nikki trembled and Harry held her steady, tightening his grip on her. "Harry!" she whimpered as she came, her hands sliding out of his hair down the stubble of his jaw. Nikki's hands shakily found his belt buckle and opened it quickly. He helped her remove his jeans and pushed them down his legs along with his boxers. Harry hopped out of the garments and tugged his shirt and jumper over his head. He placed a hand on the back of Nikki's neck and drew her urgently into his arms. Staring into her eyes he gently laid her on the rug on the floor. "I love you Nicola" he whispered into her ear as he pressed himself against her. Harry slipped easily inside her and lay still for several long moments. Now he felt like he had come home.