Thanks for the review anon. :D And the fav.!
Now this one I wrote pretty much on the brink of sleep the whole time so if it seems a little forward/confusing/poorly worded I blame it on the sleep lol.
It almost felt like coming out of a dream. You know, that almost super sleepy and dazed feeling you get when someone suddenly wakes you from a dream? It was like that when Joker woke up.
He looked over at Dr. Strange, seeing he was going through the same and eeeeeveryone around him was seeing to his poor health, and so, like the genius he is, Joker used that moment to push himself out of his seat and saw off his restraints on a broken piece of sticking-out metal.
Strange pointed rapidly at Joker, who cackled at him when he was indeed free, and like so, free to beat everyone up. And he could because everyone here was small fry.
A kick here,
A flip here,
Amazing kung fu there, Jokey. He mildly smiled at himself for being so limber, and moved to take the keys from there pockets.
One to his cell, one to break out of this pathetic excuse for a containment.
Joker swung the keys around his finger, kicking everyone slightly, just to make sure they were out cold.
Yup.
And just for shits and giggles,
"Oh Pengyyy." Joker called to the cells. Penguin popped his head up after a few seconds, desperately grasping at the grate to hold him up. He was too short to just look out of it.
Oswald blanched at the keys Joker shook out in front of him. "Let me out Joker! You and me, we can do whatever you want to do to Gotham! Good deal, huh? Let me out! LET ME OUT!" he started to shake the bars.
"I don't know." he held the keys close to Penguin's ha-flippers before pulling them back swiftly. "HAHA, NOPE!"
Penguin made some sort of squawking sound, which Joker found quite ironic, and laughed at the others plight before walking down the hall, probably beating up some orderly, stealing there clothes, and running out of Arkham.
All laughs aside, he had to find out what Batsy thought after seeing, well, his little secret...
As bad as it was, he couldn't help but find humor in it.
"Clown on the town." he giggled before fading into the dark alleys of Gotham.
"Sir?"
Bruce had been contemplating his journey into Jokers void. It really left some questions. He knew Joker for what he was, a criminal, a psychopath, and above all, completely, well, a joker. Never was he serious. But the other night..
"Oh, hi Alfred good morning." he yawned from where he sat in his bed.
"It is five in the afternoon, sir. Morning has long past." Al set down the, well, it would not be dinner, next to his bed and stood there, arms crossed.
"Oh crap, did I have anything set for today?" Bruce halfway got out of his bed, cover in one hand, and one leg extending to get up.
"No, or I would have woke you up ages ago." Alfred sighed, and Bruce climbed back in bed.
"What would I do without you Al?" Bruce chuckled apologetically at his butler, thankful for his help.
With everything going on, Bruce truely had a hard time keeping up with his normal lifestyle next to being the Dark Knight.
"Don't get so comfortable yet, Master Bruce. I'm sorry to inform you of some bad news." Alfred robotically spit it out. There was always something new happening. And this sounded like Batman business.
"Go on?" Bruce folded his arms in front of him, leaning into them.
"Joker broke out of Arkham last night. Authorities said the machine had some sort of electrical side-effect to where it gave him enough time to escape."
"Oh.." Bruce still wasn't over the whole bat-cave thing. He was pretty sure Joker would never give a straight answer, however.
"Pardon me sir, but I think our crazed crime clown may have bit off more than he can chew. You see, the machine gave Dr. Strange a concussion of sorts from being brought out so abruptly by our device. If this is true and Joker did not get injured at that moment, perhaps tonight he will be, well, sickly?"
Alfred frowned at his improper use of words.
"So...is he in any danger?" Bruce whispered. He had a strict moral code to keep to, here.
"I guess if a migraine is danger. But who knows? There could be other things that could go wrong besides just a headache."
Bruce watched his butler go into thought for a moment. Complete with a finger to his lips and his eyes looking up.
"I'll keep an eye out for him tonight Al, as I would even if he didn't have this strange sickness. I guess it'll help in taking him down." followed by uneasy laughter.
Knowing how dangerous some of the things Joker does, he'd hope the lunatic wouldn't fall into a blender. Last thing he needed was to be 'Batman, the killer'.
Joker had set camp where he knew Batman could find him.
He even looked a little miserable.
Joker was kicking his chair back, his feet propped up on some object that just happened to be in front of him. His TV stood a couple feet away, playing some sort of show he'd seen over and over again, but was somehow still funny.
Well, not tonight.
He looked over his shoulder quickly, as if he expected Bats to be there, but he wasn't.
This has been going on for about, oh, since he got out of Arkham.
Punch and Judy showed up to take orders from him, but even to their amazement he had sent them away.
Joker also had a headache. Which, being kind of loony and all, he got headaches but this one was kind of like a dull ring.
He stood, ruffling out his jacket from being bunched up, but immediately sat back down when Batman came crashing into the scene.
He fell directly in front of Joker, making the latter fall into his chair and arch up like a cat almost.
He expected Bats to be direct, but that was a little more than he thought.
"Joker." he growled out, holding a batarang in one hand to where Joker could see it.
"Ah, Batsy!" Joker clapped his hands together, but after that, remained where he was. No aggressive movement, no nothing.
Realizing this, Batman lowered his hand.
"I have a question for you Joker."
"Ah ah ah, you told me if I gave you Yin you would leave me alone about it." he smirked, holding his chin up with his hand, sitting uncomfortably in his throne-esque arm-chair.
"You were clearly expecting me." Bats pointed out. Boy, was he good.
"Maybe." Joker looked off. "I never get bored of your presence."
Ding dong. Batman looked around like he had just heard that himself.
"Huh?" he broke out of character, enough to make Joker cackle. He held his sides for a moment and pointed.
"My biggest secret." the pointy finger came and rested on his lips, red eyes staring up at Bats.
"Well, you clearly want it to be found out it seems." Bats pointed at Joker this time. He knew that he was out of character, he just didn't care anymore. JOKER was out of character!
"Who knows. I never know. One day I don't, like yesterday, and today I'm like eh." he shrugged his shoulders.
Joker took a finger and pressed it to his forehead. This headache kind of hurt.
Batman watched this exchange with his finger and forehead, and Joker smiled all silly-like.
"Do I interest you, Batman?"
"Mildly. Do you feel sick?"
"I do sort of feel...off. But then again I've been off for a long time now." And this was funny, so he laughed. Batman narrowed his eyes, but said nothing.
It was weird. An actual friendly exchange between enemies.
"So you want to know why I dreamed up a bat-cave in my mind?" Joker got to the point, smirking up at the Dark Knight from where he sat.
Batman felt his breathing stop a little.
"I wasn't always into the whole gas Gotham thing you know." he chuckled. "I wanted to be a crime fighter too. And when I made my transformation, I didn't look much like a superhero. Your everything I wanted to be. I may be mildly jealous of that, kiddo, so I was building my own sanctuary in my noodle." Joker watched for any signs of change on the others face. "Sorry if that freaks you out. That I, your crazy psychotic arch-enemy could be so.."
"Human?" Bruce finished, staring at this creature in new light. There was some humanity left after all.
"Sure!" the pitch in his voice rised, as it often did from time to time. "And I also discovered I am attracted to you in a different sense." he prodded Bruce in the chest, which Bruce immediately swatted away.
"Obviously." Batman grumbled.
"Your not getting it." Joker frowned, and traced Batmans outline with his finger, not touching him or anything, just air-tracing.
There was a point to it, but this was lost when his nose started bleeding.
"Oh?" Joker prodded at his nose, pulling back to see blood. He actually made a disgusted face, surprising Batman since he still didn't really think of Joker as a person yet, and looked at the Dark Knight.
"Well this isn't good." Joker grumbled before literally passing out in his chair. It almost looked like he got knocked out with a punch more than anything. How his eyes rolled in the back of his head, and the bloody nose.
Bruce could have shrieked, but instead, picked Joker up over his shoulder and immediately went back to the bat-cave. Something was terribly wrong.
When he arrived, he put Joker down on a stretcher that, before, was holding his things, but he cleared it off for the other.
Bruce stopped for a moment, and reached for a pair of handcuffs in a back-up locker. He held them in his hand, looking at Joker for a moment before closing them around his wrist and attatching the other to the table.
He may have appealed to Bruce's nicer side, but he was still his enemy. The one who single-handedly could have killed many Gotham citizens a multitude of times. He was not to be trusted.
Somewhere close, he heard the sound of metal hitting the floor. Bruce looked up for a moment to see Alfred standing at the foot of the stairs, eyes wide and staring at the new guest all sprawled out on the table.
"Sir..." he started.
"Can it, Al. He was bleeding and in need of attention and I will not let anyone die on my watch." Bruce began searching for this and that under his table.
"But sir.."
"I WILL NOT-" he slammed his fist down hard on the floor, making Alfred take a step back. "-LET ANYONE DIE by my hands, Al, is that so hard to understand?"
Bruce stopped and brought his knee's to his chest. Al reached down and patted the other on the shoulder. He didn't mean to yell, truly, but this was something he just had to do.
"I'll go prepare something for our guest." Alfred sighed, heading back up the stares with whatever things had dropped to the floor when he let the tray slip.
Then there was a groan. Bruce checked quickly to make sure his hood was still in place. Yes? Good. Dark eyes looked down at the other, who squinted in the light.
"Where am I?" Joker grumbled, shielding himself with his arm before realizing it was chained.
"Does it not look familiar?" Batman scoffed, turning away.
Joker sat up as much as he could, and looked around clearly. Soon his eyes went wide in amazement and he let out a crazy little giggle.
"Are we on a date, Batsy?" Joker laughed.
"No were here to make sure you do not suddenly die." Bruce was pouring concotions together, only mildly aware of the other behind him.
"Oh." it was long and drawn out. Almost irritated. Bruce looked over his shoulder casually, and saw Joker was laying with one knee up and bent, and an elbow up to hold his face. His expression was less than pleased and he was looking at the cieling.
"Did you really think that I lived in a shabby cave with nothing in it but my vehicle?"
"Maybe. You MUST be rich. Who are you Bats? I won't tell a soul." he had turned to be on his stomach, smiling creepily at Bruce's back.
"Yeah, not going to happen." he turned. "Here. You can take it or I can shove a needle into your arm. This is made to counteract any harmful substances left from the machine that you and Strange used."
Joker stared at the vial as he was being told what it was for, and eventually looked back up at Bruce. "Oh, Batsy I didn't know you cared!" he then frowned. "Hey you were using one too! How come your not sick?"
"Because I came out on my own free will. You and Strange were forced out." He picked up a needle, and showed it to Joker.
"I hate needles." the other growled, finally taking the serum. "Who knows? This is probably poison. Your life would be oh so much easier without me, right?"
When he was saying it, Joker laid on his back, letting the rest of his body go limp so he could stare at Bruce. Batman turned around, noting how long the others hair was since it hung off the very edge of the table. How does his hair look like that?
"Yes, but I am not a killer. Nor do I want all of Gotham to have another reason to chase me for."
"Right. Should've known." Joker feigned hurt, waving his hand about.
Bruce stared at the strange nut-case for a little bit before Alfred had returned with a tray full of medical devices.
"Sorry, were already done here." he refrained from using the others name.
"Jolly good then, but where will you take him to? Arkham?"
"You have a butler!" Joker had sat up and was grabbing at the ends of the table. "Wow you must be crazy rich!"
"Arkham is where he belongs. I'll take him there now." Bruce ignored Joker's comments and moved past the clown, which was a vital mistake.
It all happened in a flash, really. In one moment Joker was secure, the next, he had freed himself and had kicked the Dark Knight in the back. It caught him so off guard, Bruce didn't have time to retaliate.
"Not today, Batsy. I still have Gotham to pillage." he laughed, pulling something like a grenade out of his jacket pocket. On the front of the grenade had a big grin extremely similar to Joker's trademark smile.
Joker pulled the pin and rolled it to their feet, turning and taking off once the deed was done.
"So long! Thanks for taking care of me! Hahaha!" he tossed over his shoulder as he ran to the pole which led to the lower floors, taking hold, and then dissapearing.
"Move, Al!" Bruce barely managed to cover his butler when he heard a pop.
They both looked down at the grenade, which had now opened and in big red chicken-scratch said, 'PSYCH!'
Bruce looked to Alfred who looked to the toy and then back at each other.
"Remind me to never bring in guests again." Bruce sighed.