Title: Of Ice Sculptures and Sweetened Doughs
Summary: The first time Cullen meets her, there is an alarming amount of ice sculptures scattered across the library. Cullen/Surana
Genre(s): friendship, humor, and the beginnings of a (awkwardly written) romance.
Warning(s) for: possible inaccuracies of the Dragon Age setting, a (high) probability of poor Cullen characterization, and a whole lot of nonsense.
Disclaimer: I do not own the Dragon Age series. I do, however, own Eliora and Darren.
Note(s): I am terribly sorry about the late update! To be honest, I had been having issues with writing this chapter and eventually gave up on it a few months ago. However, there was a sudden surge of Dragon Age posts on my Tumblr the other day, and it got me all inspired to continue this piece. Hopefully the next chapter of this story doesn't prove as difficult to write! Also, reviews, as always, are greatly appreciated!
In the course of five days, Cullen learns three things.
One: The cake Eliora is attempting to make is for a fellow named Jowan.
Two: Jowan is her best friend.
Three: Eliora is probably going to end up poisoning Jowan with her gift.
"But the recipe sounds so simple! How could you say no? I mean – just look at it!" An opened book is promptly shoved into Cullen's face. A finger jabs sharply to one of the passages. "Look here, look at this – see how simple it is? I don't see how there can be any problem with it!"
Cullen skims through the contents of the pages that are held before him. After a brief moment, he frowns and says, "One of the ingredients is Concentrated Deathroot Extract. Another is Deathroot Toxin."
Eliora blinks at him. She turns the book around to face herself once more and looks at the pages it's opened on. After a while, she lowers the book from her face and says, "Okay, I'll admit that some of these ingredients don't look very appetizing – deathroot doesn't sound at all that pleasant of a root, what with the word 'death' being included in its name and all, but still, just because something sounds terrible, doesn't necessarily mean it tastes terrible."
Cullen stares at her. Eliora looks right back at him.
A moment of silence stretches between them.
"It's… deathroot," is what he finds himself saying, a little bit incredulously. Eliora doesn't even bat an eye. He tries again. "The recipe has deathroot in it." The emphasis he puts on the word gets him a tilt of the head from the mage but not much else. Huh. Does she really not know about the nature of the plant? "Deathroot. As in poison?" He gives her a minute to digest the information. When her eyes finally widen with realization, Cullen can't stop himself from asking her, "Uh, are you trying to kill him?"
The words are said in jest, of course. Unfortunately for him, Eliora doesn't seem to quite pick up on that.
"I – what – no! No, of course not!" she blurts, wide-eyed, looking quite vexed by his accusation. "I wouldn't – I would never – not to Jowan! He's my best friend! He's – he's like a brother to me! I would never try to – to do that to him! Or – or to anyone else, honest! I just – I didn't – I hadn't realized–"
"It – it was a joke. I was joking," Cullen interrupts, wanting that distressed look off her face. He hadn't meant for his words to upset her. He'd just… He'd just wanted to tease her a little, is all. Lamely, he adds, "I was… I was just teasing you, a little. I know that you wouldn't… sorry. It was a bad joke."
"O-oh. Ah, no, um," Eliora shuffles a little, closing and bringing the book closer to her chest. She looks at the floor for a minute before mumbling, "I, um, probably overreacted a little." She's silent for a moment. Soon, however, she releases a big sigh and lifts her head up to him, the look on her face sheepish. "Or, a whole lot, actually. Sorry. If you hadn't noticed by now, I can be a bit of a spazz sometimes."
She lets out an awkward laugh. She tends to do that whenever she's embarrassed, Cullen's noticed. It's kind of endearing.
"It's fine. But, uh, what kind of book does a recipe like that come from, anyway?" he asks, genuinely curious. He may not be the most experienced cook around, but he is relatively certain that deathroot is not all that common of an ingredient in most cookbooks.
"Oh, um, well, let's see here…" Eliora flips the book around, peering closely at the cover. "Exotic Antivan Delicacies: Over 200 Ways to Incorporate Aphrodisiacs and Poisons into Your Cooking… oh." She lowers the book from her face. A sheepish smile graces her features. "Did I mention earlier how terribly stupid I can be at times? I did, didn't I?"
Cullen can't help it; he chuckles. "I don't think so. I do, however, remember you telling me something about how terrible of a student you are because of your tendency to overlook things. I have to admit, I'm a bit dubious about the chances of success of your cake making – you might end up using a recipe that you've neglected to realize is actually for pie," he replies, pleased at the small laugh that it garners him. She really does have a lovely laugh… but that isn't the type of thought he should dwell on for too long, or at all, really.
He really needs to get over this… fascination of her. They'd already formed a, tentative as it is, friendship together – there was no reason as to why he'd still be so… well, aware, of her.
…right?
"…alright? Ser Cullen?" The worried tone of her voice, rather than the mention of his name, is what snaps him out of his thoughts. He shakes his head, clearing his mind further, before taking a look at her. Eliora's mouth is curved into a worried frown, clearly concerned about something.
It takes him a moment longer than he'd like to admit to realize that she'd just asked him a question.
"I – sorry, I… I was lost in thought." Smooth move there, Cullen. He sighs. "Could you, uh, repeat that?"
"Oh! Well, um, I was just asking if you were alright. You looked a bit… off there, for a second." She looks quietly at him. After a moment, she carefully asks, "You… are alright, aren't you?"
She's worried about him. Oh.
Cullen tries a reassuring smile. "I'm fine, thank you. I was just lost in thought, is all." By the look on her face, he isn't being very convincing. Best to change her focus onto something else. He gestures at the book she's holding. "Aren't you done with that? You might want to switch it out for something else."
She blinks. "What? Oh, right. This." She looks honestly surprised to see the book in her hands, as if she'd completely forgotten that she'd been holding onto it throughout their entire conversation. She sighs a little. "Right. Jowan probably wouldn't take too kindly to a poisonous cake, would he?" She doesn't wait for him to answer, instead choosing to walk over towards to the closest bookshelf. After placing her book back into one of the shelf's crevices, she runs her finger across the spines of a row of books. She hums lightly. "Hmm… no, not that one, but how about… no, that one's no good either, but maybe… ooh, maybe this one!" She plucks a book out of the shelf. She swiftly turns to face him, smiling brightly. "Ser Cullen! This one certainly looks promising, doesn't it?"
The words La Orlais et Gâteau decorate the cover of the book she is holding in elegant, golden script. Underneath the delicate writing lies an image of a decadent slice of cake, drizzled generously with smooth frosting. Cullen has to admit; it's an appealing sight. However…
"Can I see that for a moment?" Eliora graciously hands him the book. He flips it open to a random page and quickly skims through its contents. After a brief moment, he sighs and closes the book shut. "I thought so." At the inquisitive noise Eliora makes, Cullen offers her a weak smile. "It's, ah, written in Orlesian. Do you understand the language?"
"Oh. No. I don't." Her shoulders slump. A morose frown mars her features. She looks positively crestfallen. His chest twinges a little at the sight.
Silly as it may sound, he can't help but feel responsible for her plummeted mood. Sure, even if he hadn't said anything, she would've soon found out the truth upon opening the book herself, but…
It was his words that had upset her. It was he who had been the one to bring the problem to light. He, regardless of his good intentions, had been the one to make her sad – and that was the last thing he had wanted to do. He doesn't want to make her sad; he wants to see her smile. More specifically, he wants to be the one making her smile.
Cullen tries to not dwell on the whys of his thoughts. He does not think about why he does not like seeing her sad, about why he does not like the idea of being the one to upset her, about why he wants to see her smile, or about why he wants to be the reason for her smiles. Instead, he tries to think up of an apology to give her.
However, before he can even make any attempts at an awkward 'sorry for pointing out the fact that the book's written in Orlesian', Eliora looks up to him and asks, "Do, ah, do you?"
Cullen blinks, caught a little off guard. When he finally makes sense of her question, he gives an awkward little shrug of his shoulders. "A little. Though, I don't think I'm proficient enough to translate an entire recipe, I'm afraid." He tries for an apologetic smile; it feels awkward on his lips. "Sorry."
Eliora, in turn, blinks at him. "Wait, what? Why're you apologizing?"
Cullen carefully refrains himself from saying things like because you looked sad and because I don't understand Orlesian very well. His thoughts sound silly enough in his head – no need for him to make himself look like a fool by uttering them aloud.
The only thing he can do is give an awkward shrug. Surprisingly, Eliora smiles at that. "You're silly."
Cullen blinks. He isn't quite sure how he's supposed to respond to that. "I'm sorry?"
His confusion is met with by a small laugh. "You – you apologize when you've done nothing wrong. It's a bit silly," is her explanation when he gives her a curious look. Before he can even utter a sound, she continues on with, "Not that it's a bad thing, mind you – being silly, that is. I quite like it, actually. You being silly."
She smiles at him. Cullen doesn't know how to react. He's quite flabbergasted, really.
Eliora tends to have that effect on him, he's noticed.
She seems to have not been expecting a response from him, as she soon lets out another laugh and says, "Sorry, sorry! That was a bit random of me, wasn't it? I can be a bit off topic, at times. Oh, can you hand that back to me, by the way? I'm fairly certain we're not going to be able to get anything of use out of it." It takes him a moment to realize that she's referring to the book in his hands. Clumsily, he hands back La Orlais et Gâteau to her, to which she responds with a grateful smile and a 'thanks!', before turning her attention back to the bookshelf. "Let's hope I choose something that isn't written in Orlesian this time… oh, how does Treats in Tevinter, sound to you?"
He blinks. "Tevinter? I'm surprised the Chantry even allowed it to be in the library," Cullen answers honestly. He doesn't even want to think about what sorts of ingredients a Tevinter cookbook would use.
Things connected to the Tevinter Imperium were things he'd rather not get involved with, given the choice. Even if those things seem as harmless as a cookbook.
"Well, it is just a cookbook," Eliora responds, taking the book out and flipping it open. "And what harm could a cookbook possibly… oh. Oh." Her face, curiously enough, turns scarlet. Before he can even think about asking her about what had gotten her so flustered, she swiftly closes the book shut and hastily shoves it back into the shelf. When she turns to face him again, Eliora hides a cough into a closed fist. "I'm, um, relatively certain we won't be needing that. W-why? Well, because, um… the – the, uh, Tower doesn't stock up on some of those, err, ingredients that the, um, book calls for."
Oh, now she's got him curious.
Cullen hesitates. "Can I see –"
"No!" she interrupts, before wincing slightly. "Sorry. Sorry for cutting you off. That was very rude of me, but, um…" She releases a long sigh. "You… you, ah, really don't want to know what's in that book. It's, um, something you don't need to see." She bites her lip. After a short moment, she sighs again and looks up pleadingly at him. "Just, trust me on this, please?"
For a brief second, Cullen inanely thinks to himself that her eyes are so very, very blue.
Then that second is over and Cullen is brought back to the present in which he still does not know what is in that book and in which Eliora is still looking at him with such blue, blue eyes and in which he –
– he pointedly does not complete that thought, because, Maker, what is he thinking?
"Ser Cullen?" breaks into his thoughts and right, Eliora, she had told him that he didn't need to see what was in that book and had asked him to trust her and –
– she was still waiting for him to answer her, wasn't she?
"I – alright." Eloquent as always. He withholds the urge to sigh. Maker, what is wrong with him?
Eliora seems to be wondering the same thing, as she tilts her head and frowns ever so slightly at him. Her next words, however, are a complete surprise. "Are you… are you mad at me?"
"What? No!" is his immediate response. His earlier nervousness seems to completely disappear from his body, leaving him instead with the company of utter bewilderment. Cullen really doesn't know what to make of the situation. He finds himself asking, "Mad? Why would I be mad?"
"I, well… you were just quiet for so long and you had this odd look on your face as if you were… glaring?" She pauses, looking terribly unsure of herself for a moment. Before Cullen can think of a decent reply, she haltingly asks, "You… you weren't glaring at me, were you?"
"No, no, of course not. I was…" Distracted by how blue your eyes are. As soon as the thought passes through his head, Cullen feels himself tense up and has the very sudden urge to slap himself. Sweet Andraste, just what is he thinking? Those aren't the type of thoughts he should be having! Desperately, Cullen tries to squash the thought down and gets out a, "I was just lost in thought, again, is all." He winces. Maker, it sounds like such a flimsy excuse. Never mind that it is true.
"O… kay? If you say so." She doesn't look too convinced with his answer. Cullen can't blame her. Thankfully, she doesn't try to press the issue any further and moves on with, "So, um, I'm going to go and try to look for a cookbook again, and you can continue to prevent me from accidentally poisoning Jowan with dangerous plants and stop me from picking up things that are written in Orlesian. Does that, uh, sound good to you?"
Cullen blinks. He looks at her and her little, unsure, hopeful smile and finds the tension in his body draining away. He relaxes. "That… yeah, that sounds good to me."
Her smile brightens. "Great!" She swiftly turns back to the bookshelf, presumably browsing through its contents. After a brief moment, she says, "Oh, what do you think about the title Kirkwall Kakes? Though, hmm…" She pauses. Cullen can just imagine the thoughtful look she must have on her face. "They spelt 'cake' with a 'K'. That's a bit… odd, don't you think?"
"…a bit, yes," he confirms, the words drawn out of him slowly. Perhaps there'd been a few printing errors in the process of the book being published?
"Hmm. I suppose I'll put that down as a 'maybe' for now, then." She's quiet again. Before Cullen can say something as terribly cliché as penny for your thoughts, Eliora lets out an 'oh!' and plucks another book out of the shelf. She turns to face him cheerfully, holding up the book triumphantly, as if it were some marvelous prize she'd just won. "Food for Ferelden Feasts! I remember Darren saying something about this book to me earlier."
Cullen refrains himself from asking who's Darren. It's none of his business, really. Besides, Darren was probably just another friend of hers, like that fellow Jowan.
…right?
An ecstatic 'Oh, yes! This is perfect!' immediately snaps him out of his thoughts. Cullen blinks and looks at her. Eliora looks absolutely absorbed in the book; she must've opened it up while he was lost in thought. "No deathroots, no Orlesian writing, no questionable content that deals absolutely nothing with any actual cooking…" Wait, what? Before he can ask her what she means by that, Eliora barrels on with, "Simple ingredients, and a very simple recipe! Oh, Ser Cullen, I think we have a winner!"
She's positively beaming at him. The smile on her face is almost blinding. Cullen desperately scrambles his brain for an intelligent reply.
What he ends up with is, "That's great?"
Thankfully, Eliora either does not notice his lack of eloquence or simply chooses to ignore it, as she nods her head vigorously and merrily goes on with, "It is, it is! Fantastic, really! Oh, thank you, Ser Cullen, I would've never found it without your help – oh, and Darren's, too, I suppose. I probably should've just looked up what he had recommended from the start, shouldn't have I? Ah, well, I'll have to thank him the next time I –"
Her next words are abruptly caught off by a new voice.
"Eliora, is that you? Maker, I've been looking all over the place for you. Figures you'd be – oh."
That… isn't a voice he recognizes.
Cullen turns. Before him stands a human male with a mess of dark curls for hair. He, like Eliora, is wearing robes, but the one he's sporting on looks different than the ones that apprentices usually wear – a harrowed mage, perhaps?
The look on the newcomer's face is… wary, to say the least. The man opens his mouth before promptly closing it shut seconds later, looking rather… well, unhappy may be the best term. He then shakes his head before opening his mouth once more in what Cullen assumes to be another attempt at speech –
"Darren!"
– and is promptly interrupted by the cheerful voice of Eliora.
"What wonderful timing you have – I was just talking about you!" Eliora declares, smiling brightly as she takes a few steps away from the bookcase, only to stop at Cullen's side. This close up, Cullen realizes just how small Eliora is in comparison to himself.
There's at least a foot of difference in height between them, he suddenly finds himself thinking.
The newcomer, Darren, looks to Eliora and blinks. "You were?"
"Yes, I was just telling Ser Cullen – oh, wait," she pauses, alternating her gaze between Cullen and Darren. The look on her face is thoughtful, almost considering. After a while, she carefully asks, "You two… don't know each other, do you?" They both shake their heads. Eliora nods to herself. "Right. Um, introductions then. Darren, this is Ser Cullen. Ser Cullen, Darren."
"Ah, hello," Cullen greets lamely, giving an awkward nod of his head to the other male. Darren doesn't reply, instead opting to look at him blankly.
After a tense moment of silence, Darren gives his own nod of acknowledgement. "Pleasure," he says and the word is carefully neutral.
Cullen gets the distinct impression that Darren doesn't like him.
Eliora seems to pick up on that idea as well, as she hides an awkward cough into her hand and quickly says, "Um, right then! Introductions made. Great. So, uh, Darren, you said you were looking for me? Is there, um, something you need?"
Darren's gaze flits back and forth between Cullen and Eliora. After another tense silence, he replies, "Senior Enchanter Torrin wants to speak with you."
The words are directed towards Eliora, of course, but he's looking blankly at Cullen as he speaks them.
It's a little bit unnerving.
"Oh, he does? Uh, best we don't keep him waiting. I, um, suppose we should get a move on, then!" Eliora says in a rush, scurrying away from Cullen's side to Darren's. She nudges the other mage to the direction of the exit with her book, blurting out the words, "Uh, people to see, places to be! Let's, um, get a move on with it, chop, chop!"
"Fine, fine," Darren relents, allowing her to push him towards the exit's direction. "I'm going, I'm going, no need to shove."
"Just, ah, helping you get motivated," she replies hastily, as Darren walks away. Eliora heaves out a large sigh before turning to face Cullen. She looks at him apologetically. "Sorry about that. I don't know what his problem is. He's usually a very sweet guy, I swear. But, um, I really did have a great time with you today – I'll, uh, see you tomorrow, maybe?"
She's got another unsure, hopeful smile on her face again.
Cullen can't say no to that smile.
"Uh, yes. Definitely. I'll, ah… be here. In the library, that is."
Smooth.
His answer seems to please Eliora, though, as the smile on her face brightens in response. "Great! It's a promise then. I'll see –"
"Eliora! Senior Enchanter Torrin is waiting!"
"– be there in a moment, Darren!" she calls back, before shaking her head again. She smiles sheepishly at Cullen. "Err, sorry. Um, I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"
"Right," he says and he watches her as she heads towards Darren's side, a smile on her face and the book Food for Ferelden Feasts clutched protectively to her chest.
He doesn't miss the frown that Darren sends his way before the two leave.
o.O.o
Eliora isn't in the library the next day.
o.O.o
Or the next.
o.O.o
Cullen doesn't see her for the remainder of that week.