After breakfast, Rick and Kate spent the day window shopping, holding hands as they walked from shop to shop, talking and laughing. But around mid-afternoon, she could see him becoming increasingly distracted, wandering into his own head the way she'd seen him do when he was formulating theories- or flat out making up stories- for their cases. So Kate suggested that they head home and even offered to cook dinner.
"You can cook?" he'd teased in exaggerated shock.
She smiled and told him, "By cook, I meant reheat the leftovers you cooked yesterday."
He laughed and wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her close as they headed home. "Maybe I should get you cooking lessons for Christmas. Or your birthday. When is your birthday, by the way?"
"I know how to cook, Castle," she said, rolling her eyes and completely ignoring his question. "I just don't often have occasion to cook."
"Oh, right," he said in a tone of voice that made her doubt that he believed her. "But you never answered my question."
"What question?" she asked innocently.
"Your birthday…"
"Oh, that question." She was silent for a long minute and finally teased, "You mean you haven't snooped through my personal files and figured that out already?"
Rick laughed and admitted unabashedly, "Of course I have. But I thought I'd at least give you the illusion of privacy."
Kate rolled her eyes and wanted to be annoyed, but she laughed too. "At least I still have one secret… or two."
"What?" he asked, his interest piqued. "What secrets?"
"They wouldn't be secrets if I told you, would they?"
"I can keep a secret," he insisted, reminding Kate of a small child who desperately wanted to know the secrets of being an adult.
It seemed like they'd had this exact conversation before, but it was still fun teasing him; he fell for the bait every at him, she assured, "So can I."
They were finally home and as Kate began preparing dinner, Rick hung around to keep her company, but she could tell he was still distracted.
She glanced over at him as she stood at the stove and said, "I've got things covered here. Why don't you go work for a while? I'll bring your dinner in when it's done."
Rick shook his head and began a protest but Kate stopped him.
"I can see something's been bouncing around your brain all day. Go let it out!"
Rick smiled and came to stand very close to her. He put his hands on her waist and turned her to face him. Holding her loosely, he stared down at her, smiling, and said "All weekend, I just keep thinking…" he hesitated, not knowing exactly how to phrase a cliché so that I sounded unique and heartfelt. But then, maybe some things were clichés for a reason. "You and I are perfect for each other. Our personalities, our lifestyles, our sense of humor… we just fit."
Kate just studied him, watched as he moved in and closed her eyes when he finally kissed her. Breaking away, she wrapped her arms around his neck and held him close for a long minute. Eventually, she confessed, "I may have had the same thought- once or twice- recently."
Rick tightened his arms around her and held her closer. But Kate pulled away and pushed him back, telling him to go work already.
And while he worked, Kate finished supper, and then sat in the family room for a while, reading. She headed to bed without bothering him, even though she knew he'd protest in the morning, because as much as he was avoiding certain situations with her, Rick seemed to want her close, too.
For a long time, Kate lie awake unable to sleep, her confused, spiraling thoughts keeping her awake. She'd made her intentions clear all weekend long and Rick had rejected her every time. Not rejected, just… Kate tried to think of another word, but that one actually seemed pretty accurate.
Kate felt the need to roll onto her side, then her back, then her stomach, but she knew tossing and turning wouldn't accomplish anything, so she suppressed the urge to toss and it only made her more restless. So she heaved a sigh and eased out of the big bed.
Kate needed to clear her head. She needed to go somewhere she could be restless and not feel confined by the walls around her. More than anything, she needed just to get him out of her head and this entire damn house just made her think of Castle. It was beginning to freak her out, how often that man-child seemed to occupy her thoughts lately. If Kate were being honest though, she'd have to admit that Richard Castle had owned her thoughts for a long time now. So Kate headed down to the beach, grabbing a long jacket and her gun on the way out; I may be on vacation, she thought, but I am still a cop.
The shore was dark and the small bit of moon that was visible cast a sliver white light over the water and the sand. The roar of the waves and the beauty of the scene finally calmed all those swirling thoughts and Kate was able just to admire the beauty around her.
Closing her eyes then, Kate shook her hair out behind her, letting the wind blow it back and simply enjoying the feel of the salty air on her skin.
Images came to her then and she let them drift across her mind. She could picture herself here, living in a house- no, this house- on the beach. Spending summers here and the rest of the year… She let that image drift away with the wind, not comfortable with her thought's direction.
The next image was Castle, walking with her on the beach at night, holding her close, pulling her to a stop often, just to kiss her. Maybe taking her to the sand, under the moon…
Her final image was the most disturbing of all, but she held on to it longer than the others. She could see two little kids, playing on this very beach under a hot sun, building sand castles. The little girl had long, wavy brown hair and familiar blue eyes; the boy with lighter hair had her own dark green eyes. And with them, a young red-haired woman- Alexis- guiding the children in the finer arts of sand castle construction. What scared her most was not the clarity with which she could see their faces, but how much she wanted the vision to come true. Alexis would make a wonderful older sister. And Castle… as she let the day dream continue, she could see him scooping up the children and playing with them and Alexis, chasing up and down the beach, splashing in the waves.
The thought brought tears to her eyes. Kate blinked her eyes open, banishing the fantasy and staring again at the ocean.
I don't want to love him, she thought. She'd been fighting it- fighting him- for years because she was afraid of what loving Richard Castle would do to her. If she loved him, she'd have to care and caring about him, his actresses, his exes and his deep fried twinkies might drive her mad. Kate wasn't a jealous person by nature, and she didn't want to become one. Though it was true, she'd never seen him in a steady relationship, so she could only hope that despite the philandering as a single man, he was the faithful type in a relationship; because everything she'd learned so far indicated that he might be.
A single tear finally slipped free when she realized that it might already be too late; she felt something for him and now he seemed uninterested. Maybe it was time for her to cut this weekend short and try to put Rick Castle behind her.
Kate took a deep breath to calm herself and spoke. "I couldn't sleep." She glanced at the man beside her, finally acknowledging his presence. He'd been right there beside her most of the time she'd been fantasizing about him.
"You really freaked me out for a minute there," he admitted. "I saw the motion sensor light come on and when I checked, the back door was unlocked."
"Sorry," she murmured.
"No worries." Kate saw in her peripheral vision that he'd turned to study her face. "You shouldn't be out alone though… at night."
Kate finally smiled and told him, "Don't worry, Castle. I'm armed."
He breathed a laugh, smiling and said, "Of course."
They stood and stared out at the water then, watching the ocean for a long silent moment. Eventually, Rick tugged her hand out of her pocket and entwined his fingers with hers.
"Is everything okay?" he finally asked.
She took a breath to tell him, Yes. Everything is fine, but she couldn't do it. Kate didn't want to lie and she wanted answers. She decided just to ask. "Why don't you want to sleep with me?"
Rick was obviously surprised by that question, but he let out a short laughed. "Of course I do."
"Then why won't you?" she asked. He was silent so long, Kate continued. "I'm sure I made it obvious that I was willing. So why-"
"Believe me Kate," he cut her off, his voice firm. "I want you. But I'm going to be here all summer after you leave on Monday and I didn't want you to think I'd use you like that."
"That's thin, Castle," she told him in an almost warning tone.
So Rick continued. "I was also afraid that even if we did sleep together this weekend, you might change your mind about me during the remainder of the summer. And I want you for more than just one night, Kate. I wanted you to see that I was serious about you, not just using you."
"So your solution is to make me feel like you don't want me at all? Great plan, Ricky," she added sarcastically.
He turned to face her, but Kate continued to stare out at the ocean. "I'm sorry I made you feel that way. Believe me, it was the last thing I intended to do. I just wanted some time… to let you see how much I-" he broke off, afraid to say the words. Because once he said them, there was no taking them back, and he still didn't know how Kate felt about him. Coward, he accused himself silently and- taking a deep breath- he said it before he could chicken out, "I love you."
Kate finally turned to look at him, wide eyed in astonishment. But then she frowned and asked, "Why would you push me away then?"
He looked uncomfortable, but he answered honestly, "Because I wanted you to love me too, before we took that step together. I thought if we spent the weekend here alone and I showed you how great we are together, even without the sex, then you'd see that we belong together, for more than just a weekend."
It made some kind of bizarre sense, even if she disagreed with the methods. So Kate laughed and confessed, "One of the things I love about you, Castle." He looked stunned over her casual use of the word 'love,' but she continued, "You can always make me laugh."
He finally recovered himself and asked incredulously, "Did you just use the L word?"
"Lesbian?" she asked, jokingly misinterpreting him. "I didn't say anything about lesbians." He was such an easy mark.
"Stop trying to distract me," he commanded.
She smiled. "I said there are things about you that I love. I didn't say I loved you."
"But you will," he concluded, confident in the eventuality.
"Hmm," she mumbled non-committaly.
Rick put a finger under her chin and tilted her head back for a better look at her eyes. He smiled at what he finally saw there. "You can't hide it from me. I can see it there in your eyes."
"You think you can read me?" she challenged.
"Like a book I penned myself," he confirmed.
"What are my eyes saying now?"
Castle pretended to consider for a long moment then told her, "This fool thinks he can read me?"
"Uncanny," she confirmed.
"Now they're saying, 'when is this fool going to shut up and kiss me'?"
"You are good," she joked, smiling before his mouth came down gently on her own. Eventually, she asked, "Are you going to take me inside now and make love with me before I explode?"
Rick shook his head, and Kate's eyes widened incredulously. Before she could say anything, his hands swept down to cup her back side and he yanked her body tight against his own. "Too far. Can't wait," he mumbled, as he kissed her again and began guiding her down to the sand.
Kate glanced toward the house, just thirty yards away and was about to comment but when she opened her mouth to speak, the words that came out were, "I love you."
Rick pulled back enough to smile at her, before he practically tackled her back onto the sand. Kate landed gently, protected by Rick's arms around her and she laughed at his exuberance. He unzipped her long jacket, helping her pull her arms out and spread it out wide around them, using it as a blanket for them to lay on.
Rick came down to kiss her, and when every line of his body was pressed against hers, Kate wrapped her leg around his waist and pulled his hips closer. His hand moved to touch her, beginning at her ribs and making its way down her body, but something stopped him. He wrapped his hand around the warm metal tucked into her clothes, and said, "Why Detective. Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"
Laughing again, Kate shook her head and informed him, "That's my line."
"But I don't have a gun on me," he contradicted her, teasingly.
"I'm sure if I frisked you well enough, I could find a weapon on you," Kate argued, her hands slipping down to his waist. One hand reached between their bodies and began stroking the hard length of him, and she sing-songed, "Found it!"
Rick wanted to laugh, pleased that she was so much fun to be with, but when her hand squeezed him, he groaned into her neck, his hips twitching into her grasp. He moved to kiss her, his mouth hard on hers as her hand continued to slide over the outside of his pants. It took all the little focus he had to unbutton her shirt, and when he spread the lapels apart, he was surprised and pleased to find she wore nothing underneath. He found that if he didn't get away from Kate's grasping hand soon, this night wasn't going to last very long.
Rick began kissing his way down her neck and across her chest, moving down her body as he did so. Kate's now empty hands explored his upper body, running over his arms, his back and clutching his hair when he finally took the peak of one breast into his mouth. He quickly had her gasping for air, her body warm all over from the sensations he created, he moved just low enough to kiss the rose tattooed on her ribs before making his way over to her neglected breast. With his hand on one breast and his mouth on the other, Rick soon had her writhing and moaning beneath him. He pulled back again to look down at her, to study her face as he gave her pleasure, and he was distracted.
Cocking his head for a closer look, he found the last tattoo under her right breast, a mirror image of the rose on the left side of her body. He smiled and when he noticed Kate looking up at him in question, he said, "I found the last tattoo." He ran a single fingertip over the rosebud. "It's the same color," he began, but didn't finish. Instead he moved his finger to the tip of her breast to indicate what the tattoo was the same color as.
She gasped again, but shook her head. "Not the last one," she said, unable to catch her breath or form complete sentences. "One more." And then she glanced down her body to indicate where the last one might be.
Rick pulled back to look down at her shorts and when he looked back up in question, Kate nodded her head. He moved away to pull off her shorts- growing more excited when yet again there was nothing on her body under the garment- and he looked down at her. She was pretty much naked now, while he was still fully dressed, so he pulled off his own shirt just to even things out a bit. He had to move closer in the dark to see the last tattoo clearly, not to mention all the lovely parts of her body that kept distracting him from his current objective.
On the soft flesh right inside her hip bone, was a pretty little butterfly. Moving closer to get a better look, he realized the butterfly was more than just pretty, it was dangerous looking too; it had sharp points concealed within the design and blood red droplets falling from some of them. It was a little too small to see clearly especially in the dim moonlight, but it also looked like the face of the tattoo was a grinning skull. It was silly, but Rick put his hand on her hip and ran his thumb over the design just to see if it really was as sharp as it looked. Of course it wasn't, but he kept his hand there, grasping her hip, as he lowered his head to put his lips where his thumb had been.
When her knees closed on his ribs, he began kissing his way back up her body, all the way to her ear. "I like it," he said, biting her earlobe gently. "It's beautiful and dangerous. Just like you."
Kate smiled, reaching between them and opening the fastening on his jeans. "You should see my motorcycle," she said, as she pulled him out of his jeans so she could stroke him.
Rick lowered his body to rest on top of her, groaning into her neck, before pulling back sharply and asking, "You have a motorcycle?"
Laughing, she wrapped a leg around his thigh and urged him closer, positioning him so that when he moved he'd be right where she wanted him. And- for the moment at least- he forgot all about anything that existed apart from Kate's body moving with his.
A/N: Yeah, I guess they were a bit OOC in this one. I had this plan in my head though and it wouldn't work if the characters didn't act a little bit abnormally. Well, I hope you liked how it finally worked out, this is probably the last chapter. Unless I can think of an epilogue, but we'll see.
Longest chapter ever! - but not in a bad way this time- Yay!