This was one of those chapters where I wrote the first part and wanted something more. So I wrote the second section and the story just kind of trailed from my fingers. Another chapter where I was kind of like "Meh, whatever, not exactly what I wanted."

Those Voices

Ryan sipped his coffee as he walked into the Trace lab. He set his cup down on the counter by the door, in his usual "safe area." He smiled at Molly as she typed on the computer.

"So what are you looking for today?" Ryan asked, leaning against the counter.

"I'm actually doing a little personal business really quick," Molly said.

"May I inquire as to what?" Ryan politely asked.

Molly smiled shyly as a slight blush formed on her cheeks. "Yes you may," she quietly said. "I was checking out reservations for a restaurant online."

"Going on a date later?" Ryan inquired.

"Well, I'm hoping I am." Molly looked at him before she darted her eyes away.

Realization washed over Ryan. He sighed and stood up straight. "Molly, I'm not going to go on a date with you," he quietly said. "I have a girlfriend."

"Who's dead," Molly bluntly said. "Jessica Caine is dead, Ryan. She's never coming back."

"No, you're wrong," Ryan angrily said. "Jessica's alive. There are multiple witnesses who can attest to her being alive all over the world. I've seen her with my own two eyes. She's alive and she's coming home to me."

"Please Ryan," Molly said, walking around the desk to him, "Can't you give me a chance? Can't you give us a chance?"

"No, I can't," Ryan quietly said, taking a step back. "I love Jessica. She's the only girl for me."

"Then what has all of this been to you?" Molly quietly asked as her eyes seemed to water. "You were so kind to me when I first came here. You didn't make fun of my checklists or my strange habits. You took me out into the field. You made me feel accepted."

"That's all I was trying to do," Ryan quietly said. "I know what it's like to be the new guy. I just wanted to help you out. I wanted you to feel accepted. I'm sorry if I sent the wrong message, Molly, but I have no interest in you. I love Jessica and someday I'm going to marry her."

Molly looked at him with hurt eyes. "You really have to make up some stupid excuse like that just because you don't want to go out with me?"

"No Molly," Ryan practically whispered, "I'm giving you that excuse because I don't want to be with you because I have Jessica."

He turned and walked from the lab, grabbing his coffee on his way out. Molly ran out into the hall and watched him walk away.

"You're not so great, Ryan Wolfe!" she yelled after him. "You're just a stuck up snob! And you know what? I do think you really are dating Horatio Caine!"

Ryan stopped and looked at her with a perplexed expression. "You're a very sad individual," he said to her before he turned and walked away again.

Ryan walked into Horatio's house with a six pack of beer. He wandered through the silent house, listening for any signs of life.

"H?" he called out. He looked into the kitchen to find Horatio standing there alone. He was hunched over the sink, a glass of scotch resting next to his hand, a half empty bottle sitting on the counter.

"Horatio?" Ryan quietly said as he walked over to him. He gently placed a hand on Horatio's arm and noticed he was crying.

"Jessica always told me I put on a bit of a persona," he quietly said. "She used to tell me everyone at the academy thought I was some kind of hard ass but really I was a bit of a softy. I used to do it to scare people so they wouldn't find out about my demons."

Ryan stood there silently, listening to Horatio whisper things Ryan had never heard before.

"She was the only one who knew the real me and my demons," Horatio whispered.

"I had a father like yours, Ryan," he quietly continued on, "Only my father didn't limit his abuse to my mother. He would mercilessly beat me day in and day out. I went to high school with a broken collar bone one day. I didn't tell anyone it was broken but one of my teachers figured it out. I was sent home with an order to take me to the hospital. My father refused and broke it even further. My mother watched until she could no longer stand it. She tried to fight him off but it only resulted in her skull being cracked.

"One day I came home from one of my community college courses to find my mother weeping over my father's dead body. Someone had broken into our house and murdered him. He was home alone because he was a drunk and refused to work. They slit his throat and he bled out on the kitchen floor. I held my mother in my arms as she cried. She looked at me and asked if she was a terrible person because she was more upset that we had been robbed then she was of the death of my father."

Ryan looked at Horatio with his large hazel eyes. Horatio could see the sorrow that Ryan was feeling as he quietly listened.

"I've only ever told one other person that," Horatio whispered. "Jessabelle was my savor, the only one I could confine these things in. I betrayed her that night. I promised to keep her daughter safe but I didn't. I raped her."

"You didn't rape Izzy," Ryan whispered. "She asked you to share your love and your body with her that night."

"Statutory rape is still rape, Ryan," Horatio's pained voice hissed. "I should have never done that. I should have said no. I should have turned myself in for what I did. I've lived a life filled with lies. Lies that I can't tell anyone because I'll loose everything I've ever had."

Horatio lifted his glass and took a drink. "I still hear their voices when I can't sleep at night. I hear my mother's pained cries and her yelling for me and my brother to escape. I hear her tell me to get as far away from my father as I can. I hear Jessabelle's pained cries as the cancer ate away at her body. I hear Brian's dying words to care for his daughter as he left this world. I hear James's taunting words as he hurt my little girl. I hear Izzy crying out in pain. I hear Marisol dying in my arms again and again.

"I hear Jessica screaming out in my mind," Horatio whispered. "I hear the pain she's lived through all these years. I hear how I've failed her as a father."

Ryan gently grasped his arm. "You didn't fail her, Horatio," he whispered. "No one's a perfect parent. Such a thing doesn't exist. You have done the best you can and that's all you can do."

"But I let so much pain happen," Horatio nearly choked on his words.

"I wouldn't be dating Jessica if you had failed," Ryan whispered.

Horatio looked at him with shock in his sad blue eyes. "Why not?"

"Because Jessica wouldn't be here," Ryan quietly continued. "She would still be Izzy, she would be in prison, she would really be dead." Ryan stared deep into Horatio's eyes. "She wouldn't have your eyes. The eyes that I love and can only hope our children will someday inherit. She wouldn't be this incredibly amazing woman that I love. Horatio Caine, you've made a lot of mistakes but you've never failed your daughter."

Horatio stared at Ryan for a long moment, unable to say anything. "You really think so?" he finally whispered.

Ryan slowly nodded his head. "I know so," he whispered in response.

Horatio slowly reached out and placed his hand on Ryan's cheek. He brought his face to his and gently kissed Ryan's cheek. "Thank you," he whispered.

"No, thank you, Horatio," Ryan whispered. "Thank you for letting me have the one thing that means more to you than anything in this world."

"I wouldn't trust anyone less with the life of my daughter," Horatio quietly said.

I actually wrote this chapter before I found out that Horatio really did have an abusive father growing up.