All In The Name Of A One Sided Love

Sakura found it hard to believe that, lately, if there was anyone she remembered, it was Kabuto. She and Ino were still spending the usual amount of time together, as were she and Takara. However, when she thought back on it, all she could remember, really remember was being around Kabuto.

And, the thing was, she thought about him a lot.

She didn't like where those pieces of information led her, because, really, she didn't want to imagine herself as being so fickle. She had, after all, come here in search of Sasuke, not Kabuto. In fact, she had hated Kabuto. If she had already fallen in love with Kabuto, and out of love with Sasuke, what did that make her? It meant that she still had the mind of the younger fifteen-year-old who would swoon at the sight of any hot guy, especially Sasuke.

But, the really weird thing is, is that while she did think Kabuto was decent-looking, he still was no comparison to the looks of Sasuke. But that didn't matter. It was his personality and the conversations she was finding herself thinking more and more of. It was as if she had gotten, somehow, deeper.

This made her think of many months ago, when she had asked Ino how she could have possibly fallen in love with Chouji. He was extremely obese, and really, he never stopped eating. But, somehow, Sakura supposed that Ino had beaten her—she had shed her shallowness much quicker than Sakura, herself, had. But that didn't matter, because as long as she didn't mention it to Ino, she could never tease Sakura with how she had beaten her—although it had, after all, been something not strength or Sasuke-related, so perhaps it didn't count.

Not that it mattered, now that their rivalry had been terminated.

Sakura continued to chop the stem of the flower, still working on the medicine for toothaches. What kind of a ninja would need medication for toothaches? Sakura didn't know, but she supposed Kabuto would make her learn all of them. Better safe than with a sore mouth…

As she continued chopping, she glanced up at Kabuto. He had finally stopped watching over her like a hawk, and was completely relaxed, even when she had a knife at this point. He just made a point to not piss her off when she was near sharp, aerodynamic, or blunt objects. Not brilliant. He also made it a point to keep her away from target practice. Why help someone else hurt himself?

Sakura's mind drifted a little as she stared at Kabuto, who's head was tilted down at a book as he reclined in a chair that he had moved into the room simply for his comfort. His head was propped against a fist, leaning to the right of the chair.

She sliced off a part of her fingertip. She cried out in pain before sticking the hurt finger into her mouth, in order to clean the blood quickly. Even, a little of the blood had split onto the cutting board and knife, and stained some of the stem pieces. Kabuto immediately jumped up and pulled her finger out of her mouth, examining it.

He sighed and shook his head before running his fingers around the wound, closing it up with medical chakra.

"I… could've done it myself…" Sakura said, looking down at the ground to hide her light blush. Wait a minute—she didn't blush! She never blushed around Sasuke! But, then again, Sasuke had never been so… well, caring was the world, she supposed, but still. He had never done that for her.

"Yeah, well, then do it next time instead of sticking the finger in your mouth," Kabuto mumbled. "Acting helpless…" he growled under his breath.

"Thanks…" Sakura half-whispered unconsciously as she picked up the knife, ready to start chopping.

"You are welcome. And, if you're not careful, I'm going to take away 'pointy object' privileges, not just knives," Kabuto threatened with a smirk.

"Do I need to chunk the cutting board at you?" Sakura retorted testily.

Kabuto didn't reply, but returned to the book.

----

"I heard Sakura cry out in the 'medicine-making' room," Takara informed Kabuto with a smirk, using air quotes at the term medicine making. "Are you violating Sasuke's future wife… child-bearer… nanny… person?" Her lack of eloquence didn't keep Kabuto from freezing. He didn't violate her; in fact, her crying out in pain was Sakura's fault. And before he could open his mouth to reply with this, Takara began laughing. "You didn't say anything, so that means you are!" she accused.

"You act like a little kid sometimes, Takara, and no, I was not doing anything with Sakura," he almost added that Sakura was not Sasuke's, but, quite technically, she was. In fact, the one allotted to him was Ino. He frowned at this thought.

"So, what are you going to do when Sasuke gets to penetrate Sakura?"

"Your bluntness is overwhelming, Takara," Kabuto growled, walking away, making no answer to the last question, because, really, there was no answer. He'd have to sit back and take it.

"Uh-huh. You going to try and convince Sasuke that Ino is actually better?" Takara said casually.

"… You don't mean that. What do you really want me to do?" Kabuto asked, raising an eyebrow. He had been in situations like this—well, not quite like this, but similar. Kabuto would get smacked—hard—if he answered wrong.

"Isn't it obvious? Run away with them. Your motive allows you to leave at any time. You no longer need to depend on Orochimaru to attain what you want," Takara explained.

"You just want me to be on the run like you. Where would I go?"

"Konoha. With Sakura and Ino. And I could come with you," Takara added the last part on as an afterthought, but Kabuto knew that that was what she had wanted the entire time.

"Oh? And have one of the most powerful ninja in the world have a personal vendetta against me?" Kabuto retorted, annoyed because she hadn't thought that part through. But, then again, Takara wasn't one to get into such conversations without having thought about it for a long, long time beforehand, thinking of any and all contingencies.

"Yeah, but you're forgetting one thing—you'd be on the side that has the other two most powerful ninja affiliated with it," Takara pointed out.

Kabuto sighed. Takara's suggestions were beginning to sound good, but, still…

"And, besides, this is the first time I've seen you like a girl. I was beginning to think you were either homosexual or asexual…" Takara admitted with a chuckle.

"Shut up," Kabuto growled, his pace quickening. He had heard enough of Takara's side. And he needed to think. Besides, it would only be a little while longer before Orochimaru and Sasuke returned from their mission, not to mention, he knew that the Konoha nin would be looking for Ino and Sakura…

----

Kabuto lay to one side of the bed, facing the door as a habit. He was not a person who tossed and turned when he couldn't sleep—he only did that when he had nightmares, and those 'nightmares' where usually memories of his past experiences, not just simple fabrications of a worried mind. They were things that had actually happened.

But, no, when he couldn't sleep, it was usually because he was either restless or because he was deep in thought. Tonight it was because of the latter. He was thinking about what Takara had said. Really, that option had the most to gain for him. But he had been loyal to Orochimaru for… a long time. A very long time. In fact, he had been loyal to Orochimaru for probably over half his life. That was a long time, in Kabuto's eyes.

He had always known what Orochimaru was doing was evil. Hell, most of what was considered part of a real ninja's life was defined as evil. Assassination, mutilation, kidnapping, torture, infiltrating someone's memories… all parts of the regular day, and all for a paycheck, all because someone had told them to do it, usually for simple political reasons. On more than one occasion, his missions included all of those.

But he hadn't cared, simply because that was the life of the ninja, and the sooner you learned to deal with it, the more adjusted you could be. A real ninja was bothered by the images of the people they had hurt, but Kabuto wasn't, for the simple fact that he knew that he would, eventually, pay the price, and that that vast majority of the people he had committed such atrocities towards had done just the same to others. So, what was the point in making yourself feel bad over something as simple as that?

Because Kabuto actually believed that, and was dead-set in believing it, was the reason Orochimaru liked him so much. Because he was like him—he didn't mind death. But, then again, Orochimaru didn't just tolerate it—he relished it, as if killing or torture was a drug that he couldn't get enough of. That, at first, sickened Kabuto, but he had gotten used to the aspect of Orochimaru. Whatever it took for you to live, hey, go for it. Perhaps Orochimaru couldn't stand for less than living for what he loved—and so, he loved death, and lived for death.

'It's not such a bad deal… Hell, it's the best option I have. It's the best option for them, too, of course, because that means they get to go back home. But what if, just if, I'm not accepted into the society of Konoha? I suppose I could always waltz into the village, a kunai at Sakura's neck while Takara has a kunai at Ino's neck, and as soon as they take me to Tsunade, I'd release them… That way we'd have a chance.

Wait. Am I considering this? The idea itself is crazy. I've always been loyal to Orochimaru, despite him being a pedophile… a freak… and a sadist… But he was the only one who accepted me initially, after my 'monster' episode, though that was on a small scale. And, of course, I'd have ANBU tailing me everywhere I went, to make sure I wasn't still corresponding with Orochimaru…

But, on a personal note, I'd be with Sakura in a less… Well, intimidating environment. And, perhaps, it could lead to something more than just the relationship we have now… And, of course, Ino would be with her fiancé… But could I answer to Tsunade? I am, after all, the right hand man to her greatest enemy. Would she trust me, if perhaps Sakura and/or Ino explained the situation?'

Kabuto's thoughts soon led him to drift to sleep. For the first time in a long time, he had nightmares…

He was running through the streets, running to meet Sasori. He was being driven by something he couldn't fight, and when he did fight it, it really hurt. He ran through the village, ignoring completely the requests of the man who had taken him in to be home in time for dinner. Sasori would initiate the painful part of the jutsu if he didn't arrive on time…

He got there just in time. Sasori instructed him to go and spy on Orochimaru, who was working on still unknown business in his laboratory. Before he left, Sasori injected him with a serum. According to Sasori, it improved his chakra, mental abilities, strength, and his stamina. It hurt to have it injected, but Sasori was the boss. Why, Kabuto didn't know, but it was as if he was forced, or somehow attracted to the man…

He left, running once again, for the laboratory. He snuck around the back and peered inside. Almost as soon as he did, he was caught by Orochimaru. He had done it so many times it wasn't funny, so why did he capture him now?

Suddenly, something in his mind snapped. He could feel his free will returning. And then, he remembered red…

Kabuto bolted into an upright position, nearly falling to the floor. He gasped out, and wiped away the thin layer of salty sweat that had formed on his face. He stood, putting his glasses on, and walked to the bathroom. He washed his face and drank the water from the sink, not caring that it was unfiltered.

In reality, that had all happened, though the events were more drawn out. He had spied on Orochimaru due to Sasori's mind control, and because of the serum that Sasori injected into Kabuto, his body was exerted to an abnormal level. The jutsu placed on his mind to keep him in control was a way to help suppress that, and when Orochimaru broke it, Kabuto snapped. He remembered waking up and seeing a bloody Orochimaru offer to become his new boss. He had agreed, and that had left him to where he was now.

He stared at himself in the mirror. He thought of his original home—well, okay, he didn't know where he really originated. All he knew what that he was found in Kikyo Pass as a young child, taken in by a medical ninja, recruited by Sasori who injected him, and then re-recruited by Orochimaru. That was his childhood in a nutshell.

He chuckled as a strange thought struck him—he had never really been a loyal person. So, why should he stick with Orochimaru, other than the fact that he was the one who had saved him? But, then again, had it not been for the fact that he snapped, Orochimaru probably would have killed him, rather than recruit him.

Kabuto sighed and started staring at the sink. Takara's proposition wasn't looking so bad now… And then he decided that he would do just want she had suggested. They would leave within the week, and go to Konoha. Soon. Because it really wasn't long before Orochimaru was expected back…

He would give them the good news the next day, Kabuto decided.

A/N: I developed Kabuto quite a bit, and the feelings between Sakura and Kabuto. The climax is coming soon—and that means that, at the most there will be about five more chapters, plus an epilogue. Depends on how long I can play it out. The next chapter will be a bit Konoha-centric. ;D Review, please!