Chapter 2

Lily charged down the train corridor, her heart pounding in her ears. She looked around wildly, looking for somewhere, anywhere to collect herself. Running her hands frantically through her hair, she glanced to her left and noticed that she was attracting the attention of some wide-eyed second year Ravenclaws playing exploding snap in an open compartment.

"What are you looking at?" she snapped, and they started to giggle nervously. With an impatient "hmmph", she slammed their compartment door closed. After another moment of looking around she found a secluded nook at the end of the train corridor and dashed toward it. Once she glanced around once more to make sure that nobody was around, she sank against the wall and let out a large exhale.

"Get a grip, Evans," she whispered to herself. "Get it together."

How was it that she'd known him for six years, and yet now, now she felt like she was losing her mind? The whole time she'd been speaking to him, she didn't even know what she'd said. There had been a loud roaring in her ears and a dull thudding against her chest. She'd had crushes before, but this was different. She'd felt like she was struck by lightning when she'd come face to face with him, her friends that she'd been running to find, forgotten. All she could think of now was the dark look he'd had on his face when she'd opened the door. What was wrong? Could he have possibly been thinking of her?

"Shut UP," she hissed to herself. Her hand flew to her mouth. She was talking to herself. She never talked to herself. That settled it. She was going insane, and she just had to find a way to avoid him for the next year so that she could get her emotions under control.

"Lily, is that you?" came a familiar, lilting voice. Sure enough, Alice Smethwyck peeked into the small nook, her brown eyes round and huge in her delicate, heart-shaped face.

Alice was Lily's best friend, and had been since their third year. Although she was tiny, she was feisty. She'd been the one to finally get Lily's nose out of the books she'd always had them buried in. She'd toured Lily through Hogsmeade, had her stay for weeklong sleepovers at her family's mansion, and introduced her to almost every place Lily had ever been to in the wizarding world outside of Diagon Alley.

It was also Alice who had sat her down one day and told her that people were afraid to be friends with her because she was friends with Severus Snape. She was the first one to explain to Lily, in a quiet, delicate way, what a "Death Eater" was. And she'd been the one to hold her that first night, as she would many nights after that, when he, the first boy she'd ever loved, let her down. Lily did not like to think about those times. But it was because of all that Alice had done for her that Lily instinctively brightened at the sight of the face that always made her feel better.

"Yes…hi Alice." Lily waved pathetically and held her hands out to be helped up. Alice grabbed them and hoisted her off the ground, then wrapped her in a hug.

"I've missed you," Alice said fiercely, her head just reaching the top of Lily's shoulder. After a moment she released her.

"Who are you talking to in here?" Alice asked, looking around as though she would see someone else within the tiny alcove.

"I—Nobody, I just—oh Alice, I think I'm going a bit mad."

Alice frowned.

"What did they do? I've told Potter to leave you alone, I'm sorry Lily, I swear I thought they'd grown up a little, and just wait till I—"

"Alice, Alice, no, you've got it all wrong they haven't—I mean I just—would you be able to accept it if I just promised you I'll tell you later?"

"Absolutely not." Alice said seriously, her smile saying otherwise. "By later, you mean later…tonight?"

"I will if the boys don't…well that's stupid, of course they'll be having a party tonight."

Ever since second year, the boys from their year had made it a tradition to throw a back to school party in the Gryffindor dormitory. The first couple of years, there had been halfhearted attempts by the prefects to put a stop to it; those had been largely unsuccessful, and even as Head Girl, Lily was both agitated and relieved to know that nobody expected (or indeed, wanted) her to do anything to stand in its way.

"Oh come onnn Lily," Alice wheedled, eyes twinkling. "Drunken confessions are the best sort."

Lily opened her mouth to give a smart reply, when she caught sight of James approaching over Alice's shoulder. His hair looked particularly ruffled and his clothes a bit disheveled. He had a film of sweat that beaded across his forehead and highlighted the muscles on his forearms, which were visible where he'd rolled up the sleeves on his sweater…She found her mouth had gone slack, and she quickly snapped it shut, swallowing audibly.

Alice turned to see what she was looking at, then back at her, her eyes narrowed and calculating.

"Hello, ladies," James said coolly, leaning against the wall of the corridor once he'd reached them. "Ev—Lily, we're supposed to be patrolling the train, or…something like that, yeah?"

Lily found herself staring at him for a moment, before shaking her head and clearing her throat.

"Er—ahh—yeah, yes, didn't I tell you that before?" She desperately hoped that she sounded nonchalant, but the roaring had begun in her ears again, and she quickly found herself losing track of what she was saying.

James shrugged.

"It's possible. Who knows? Let's get this over with, shall we? How about this, I'll take the back ones—" here he gestured at the cars behind them on the train "—and you take the ones up there." He finished with a smile, flashing perfectly white teeth.

Lily barely heard a word that he said. How had she gone so long without wanting to run her hands through that hair? To bury her head in that chest, to inhale the cologne that she could faintly smell across the corridor…she tore her eyes away so she could stare at the ground.

"Mmmhmm, sounds great," she heard herself saying. "Thanks, Potter." She looked up from under her lashes to see that his bright smile had slipped a little. She didn't know whether to be relieved or dismayed at sounding like her old self for the first time that day.

"Right. Well, ahh—right, I'll see you both later." And with that he turned on his heel and headed toward the back carriages. As soon as the door shut behind him, Alice slapped Lily's arm, hard.

"Ow! What was that for?!"

"You love him!" Alice exclaimed, her eyes looking so round now that they bulged from their sockets.

"What? No! No! Alice, shut up." This last part Lily hissed, as Alice shook her head, unconvinced.

"You want to marry him and have his messy haired babies. I have never seen you like this, Lily. What happened? What did he do?"

Lily felt her face burning.

"Alice, if you don't be quiet, the entire train is going to hear you. Shut. Up."

Alice slid open the closest compartment door and looked inside. From over her shoulder, Lily could see it was empty besides a snogging couple.

"You two," Alice bellowed, causing the couple to jump and pull apart. "That's right. Head Girl coming through. Beat it at once."

The girl went to get up, but the boy made a noise of impatience and pulled her back onto his lap.

"We're not going anywhere," he sneered. "You can't tell us—"

"Pipe down, Bones. You think I won't tell your Ministry girlfriend that you've been snogging with Ms. Fifth Year Hufflepuff over here?"

The boy didn't move, but looked visibly uncomfortable. The girl whipped around to look at him.

"Ministry girlfriend? I—but you said—Edmund!" The girl ripped her hands from his and stormed away. The boy, Edmund, gave Alice a filthy look.

"You'd better not say anything to—"

"Can it, Bones. Just go."

Silently, Edmund Bones shuffled out. Alice grabbed Lily and pulled her inside, shutting the door quickly.

"Alice, you barely speak to Edmund Bones. Isn't he in Ravenclaw? How do you know about his Ministry girlfriend?" Lily asked, desperate to avoid the inevitable.

"Frank works with her," she said dismissively. Frank Longbottom, Alice's longtime boyfriend, was two years older than they were and worked as an Auror for the Ministry of Magic. Lily liked him, although she found him to be extremely quiet and hard to befriend. Alice often complained how his overbearing mother had taken the fight out of him, but personally, Lily believed that having a quiet listener was what Alice liked about him so much.

"Really, does he?"

"Yeah, she's a troll. Not literally, but—well, you know what I mean—but that's not the point. Stop distracting me! Now, as I was saying…you love him."

"Alice, that is such an inappropriate word to use for this. I just—I'd say I just—no, I don't!" Lily found herself wringing her hands, feeling perplexed and cornered. Alice's face softened.

"I'm sorry Lily. Is this what all that nonsense in the corner was about? I guess I just don't get it…last year you hated him so much, you used to always talk about how he bullied Snape…"

"I didn't hate him last year," Lily muttered, shuffling her feet. She thought about it for a moment before she continued, then took a deep breath and exhaled. "I don't exactly know what it is. He just...I guess I started to pay attention to the things he'd say and do, and he's not so terrible. Not really like how he used to be. And Sev—Snape, well he's not the nicest person either, as it turns out. "

A smile crept on Alice's lips.

"Ohhh Lily," she sang, grabbing her hands. "Lily, Lily, Lily, does this mean you're going to get together? Finally? Oh I've been waiting for you to have a good boyfriend for years! Frank will be so happy, we can go on double dates when he's not away on Ministry business and we will have so much fun!"

Lily buried her head in her hands.

"Alice," she moaned. "Please stop."

But there was no stopping her. Babbling happily, Alice linked her arm through Lily's and wheeled her out of the compartment. She continued her plans for the Potter-Evans marriage throughout the rest of the north half of the train, interrupting herself occasionally to cheerfully bark orders at anybody they saw misbehaving. Lily silently allowed Alice to do her job for her, wondering all the while how she would possibly make it through the year.

Transferring to Beauxbatons had never sounded more appealing.

James surveyed Sirius's handiwork, impressed.

"I think you've outdone yourself this time, Padfoot," he remarked approvingly.

Sirius beamed.

"You really think so?" he chirped, clearly knowing that he had.

There were tables lining the right edge of the room, loaded with butterbeer, candy, and various vials and bottles of mysterious drinks. There was a giant stack of lightweight goblets beside them. The table seemed to be sagging under their weight. Meanwhile, hundreds of glowing, colorful balls were seemingly self-suspended around the common room. Upon closer inspection, one could see that they were actually being held up by doxies coated in illuminating potion, and as they thrashed about in their glass prisons, they cast unique shadows upon the walls.

"It helps that I was able to get the drinks on my own this year," he sighed happily. "We've got some of Hog's Head's Finest Brew, Nettle Wine for the ladies, some mulled mead, and at least five different types of Firewhiskey, for the real men among us." Sirius winked, making it painfully clear who those men were. "Much better than last year's selection."

The year before, the witch who Sirius had wooed into getting the drinks had found him snogging another girl the night before the party and refused to speak to him again. In spite of their best efforts to make a last-minute dash to Hogsmeade using the invisibility cloak, through a series of mishaps they had been unable to procure more than a single, sad bottle of sherry.

James shook his head at the memory.

"Much better than last year," he echoed. He frowned slightly.

"Padfoot," he said, "what if some of the first years get their hand on the firewhiskey?"

Sirius looked confused.

"I reckon they won't remember their first night at Hogwarts, then, will they?" he laughed. "What's your point?"

"I er—I mean, well in the past we never really had enough alcohol for them to get it without us noticing, really. And I guess I—well, you know, I'm supposed to be doing this Head Boy thing, it could get a little dicey if—"

Sirius let out a barking laugh.

"You care about being Head Boy? Honestly? James it's a joke that they gave that to you, nobody expects you to do anything with it."

James shuffled his feet uncomfortably.

"That's not nice," he muttered. He thought of Lily, and the tired look she often got when Remus's retiring ways kept him from doing his prefect duties. She'd essentially been shouldering the burden of Gryffindor's behavior on her own…he wondered if he could make her beautiful green eyes light up by helping her, being her partner in all of it…

He reminded himself of the way she'd tossed him that nonchalant glance and called him by his last name in a bitter, mocking tone. Those eyes would not light up for him. He shook his head as though to clear her from his thoughts and changed the subject.

"Shouldn't we involve Moony and Wormtail in all of this? I mean I know Wormtail's busy with his girlfriend right now, but I bet Remus would've like to see it ahead of time. He might have had a few good ideas."

A shadow passed over Sirius's face.

"James, something doesn't sit right with me about him," he said darkly. "I know he's our friend, but you didn't see the kinds of things I saw when I was living at home. I've seen what my Death Eater cousins do. They always had werewolves and beasts over, bribing them, cozying up to them, anything to recruit them to You-Know-Who. They'll be doing the same thing with him soon enough."

James frowned.

"I don't think he'd do that though," he said uncertainly. "He's our friend, he wouldn't turn on us after everything."

"James, don't be daft. Three blokes he went to Hogwarts with aren't going to sustain him for the rest of his life. We aren't going to be able to get him a job with special "sick" days. We won't be able to find him a wife that doesn't mind that his time of the month is worse than hers. The real world is coming, and when it does, things aren't easy for a werewolf. I imagine after enough rejection, You-Know-Who's job offers will start to sound real nice."

They fell into an uncomfortable silence.

"Well," James said finally. "I don't suppose there's anything for it but to start on that Firewhiskey. How about you play a good host and get me your strongest, eh?"

Sirius grinned.

"I thought you'd never ask."