Last Laugh

If you asked Selece about this, she would say that it wasn't funny. It wasn't funny at all. But Jim, being the smug bastard that he was laughed his ass of when he found out about what happened. After all he was right and they were wrong and payback really was a bitch.

So it all started with one of the rare shore leaves that Starfleet gave to the Enterprise's crew. They docked on a small space port with a lot of bars and people from all the far points of the Universe, what reminded them of old truck stops that you can see along the roads across USA. For some divine miracle Jim convinced Spock to come with them to have fun, even if the half-Vulcan's face was saying that he was having anything but fun. And if you could read Spock this way, it's an indication of how pissed he was to let himself be dragged by his lover into that place.

The music was loud, people were dancing and the Romulan ale was wonderful. At some point in the night, Uhura dragged Scott to the dance floor and started to grind against him much to the Scottish pleasure. Sulu and Chekov, now a nineteen years old and aloud to drink, were having a very heated conversation about how the Romulan ale was a copy of the famous Russian vodka. Jim and Spock had disappeared to some dark corner and sometimes, when the lights struck in the right direction, they could see two forms that seemed to be trying to become one.

"I'm gonna have nightmares." McCoy grumbled and Selece rolled her eyes, taking a long shot of her ale. "And here I was thinking that that green-blooded hob-goblin didn't like to be touched in public." He gagged when he saw Jim stuck his tongue inside Spock's mouth.

"They're still in an early relationship, you can say they're still on honeymoon."

"It's more for a horny moon, than anything else. And one year isn't early." He grumbled again and Selece smirked.

"Oh Lenny, you're counting, how sweet." She singsonged and Bones grumble became louder. "How about this..." Selece grabbed the Romulan ale bottle and turned it in Leonard's cup. "you keep drinking and in about two minutes you'll forget everything that you saw this night." She served herself a bit of the ale too and clicked her cup with Leonard's.

Well, it took more than two minutes to get Bones drunk enough for him to forget everything that happened that night. And was because of that that in the next morning he woke up with a killing headache and a beautiful naked brunette sleeping beside him on his bed. A brunette that he recognized as being Selece and this made him yelp and fall out of the bed, waking the girl in the process.

Selece only rolled over her body and looked at him on the floor from her spot on the bed, blinking her too bright gray eyes for the still in shock doctor.

"What are you doing over there?" Her tone was calm, like the fact that she woke up on McCoy's bed after what seemed a long night of sex, if the aches in Leonard's body were any indication, was nothing.

"Wha-what the hell happened?" He almost yelled, but remembered in the last second that this wouldn't be good for his pounding head.

"Wow, that Romulan ale was good. You don't remember?" Bones' answer was to glare at her. "I have to say Lenny..." He didn't like the nickname and even less the smirk that was blossoming on her face. "Doctors know how to use their hands." If McCoy was capable to blush, that was the day for him to show it.

"It's not funny!" He looked at himself, naked and with his legs trapped by the sheets, and then to the girl still on the bed. He blushed more, trying and failing to cover important parts of his anatomy.

"Why are you being so prude now? Last night you didn't care if I look. And let me tell you... You don't have anything to be ashamed of." Bones was about to explode if his face getting redder by the minutes was any indication.

"Again..." He stuttered. "Not funny!" And Selece laughed.

"Come on Lenny, don't be ridiculous. Come back to bed. It's early, it's our day of and I want to sleep more."

"Nobody is stopping you." Selece rolled her eyes and hit him with the pillow, making McCoy growl in annoyance.

"A beautiful naked woman is on your bed, asking you to join her in a nap and maybe, later, another round of sex, and you are saying no?"

"No." Selece blinked. "I mean, yes... I mean..." She smiled and McCoy sighed, getting up and climbing on the bed. Selece opened some space for him and when he was under the covers again, she got closer and hugged him.

Bones took a deep breath when he felt the smooth skin and the curves aligned against his body and got tense for a few seconds. It was a long time since he shared his bed with a woman, specially a woman like Selece, so strong minded, so beautiful and so young. As the minutes passed he relaxed little by little and when he looked again to the girl was only to see that she was using his chest as a pillow and was sleeping over it, like what happened last night was an everyday occurrence.

After a while he finally relaxed enough to sleep again, only to be woke up later by a Jim Kirk entering his cabin without announcement.

"Bones I need..." The flow of words stopped the moment the Captain's blue eyes fell over the two bodies on the bed. "WHAT THE HELL!" McCoy and Selece woke with a jump, with the girl going for the phaser under her clothes on the floor and stopping in the middle of her movements when her brain registered that the scream came from Kirk.

"Dammit Jim, I almost shot you!" She grabbed the sheets, covering her body with it and sent a glare to the blond mouth gaping at the door. "Nobody ever told you to never, ever, wake up a Chizetan warrior by surprise? Other people were killed for less than that." She would start to complain about people interrupting her sleep, but a beet red McCoy and a still gaping Captain stopped her. "What?"

"You... him... Both..." Jim pointed at them, still very surprised to form any words.

"Yes Kirk, what you are seeing is what you are getting." Bones, still very flushed, said before the blond's brain started to work again and the jokes begin to flow.

"But..." Jim blinked and blinked until everything clicked together and a smirk blossomed on his face. "If I say I told you so..."

"In your next physical there will be so many hypos that you'll look like a swiss cheese." Bones threated him with no avail, because the next words that came from his mouth were:

"I told you so." And Jim left, laughing his ass of, before the pillow that Selece threw hit him.

"Dammit, I hate when he's right." She grumbled. "Now he'll be annoying us for months."

"When he is not annoying us?" Bones arched his eyebrows and Selece blinked repeatedly.

"True." Silence came after that until Selece broke it with a phrase that made McCoy blush again. "So, I think I promised another round of sex after our nap."

"Wha..." He paused, thinking for a few seconds. "You know what? Fuck it." Selece laughed and after that saw herself being pulled by Leonard against his broad chest and kissed senseless. And if a few days later all the ship's crew were looking to them with laugh in their eyes, they ignore it, but Jim learned the lesson to never again be a gossiper when his neck hurt for days because of the hypos he received in his physical. But even then nothing would take his joy for have the last laugh. Nothing at all.