Chapter 11 - Changes

The rest of the week flew by. Neither of them forgot about that night, but they didn't mention it again either. Soon, they were boarding the Hogwarts Express for home.

"So what are you guys doing this summer?" Renee asked the Marauders.

"Well, I'll be at James' all summer again," Sirius started.

"Yeah, Ray, I think you're going to have to visit to keep me from killing myself. Or him." James joked.

She laughed. "Don't worry, Jamesie, I'll save you from the big, bad Sirius."

Sirius had been pouting, but then his expression lightened. "'The Big, Bad Sirius.' I like it. It has a certain ring to it."

They all laughed while he pondered his new title. Renee turned to Remus. "What about you, Remus? What are your plans?"

He shrugged. "Don't really have any. I think my parents want to go to the coast if they can get off work. If not, then I'll probably be dragged to James', too."

"Poor you," she said with a teasing smile, "What about you, Pete? Is James kidnapping you, too?"

He chuckled. "No, we're going abroad for the summer. I think we're going to visit some family in America for awhile, then spend some time in Greece."

"Well that sounds like fun," she said, jealous that he'd be traveling.

He shrugged. "You guys will probably have more fun at James' anyway."

They talked easily until the train rolled into London. They said the normal goodbye's, promised to write, and went their separate ways. On the platform, Renee looked for her parents, spotted them, and quickly grabbed them before they could find Tarin; there would be enough time to explain all that later. In fact, on the way home, she gave them a brief summary of the events of the year.

"Well, honey," her mum said, "I wish it wasn't so, but it's normal for teenagers to grow apart as they grow up."

He dad nodded and added, "You two just matured and realized you don't have a lot in common. To be perfectly honest, I'm surprised it didn't happen sooner. You always seemed an unlikely pair."

She smiled sadly at them. "You're probably right, it's for the best. I'm just worried for this summer. It'll be awkward to live right next to her and not be friendly."

Her parents shared a look. "Well actually, sweetie, your dad has to go on a business trip for a while in about a week, and I was going to go with him. We figured you could stay with Tarin, but…"

She grinned. "That'd be a little awkward under the present circumstances. Actually, this is perfect. A friend of mine asked me to stay with him some time during the summer."

The 'him' raised her parents eyebrows and they bombarded her with questions. Who was this boy? Were they dating? What did his parents do? Had she even asked his parents? Did she expect them to just let her spend all summer at some boys house?

It took some serious persuasive skills, but she finally got them to reluctantly agree, as long as they met him and his parents. Grinning, she thanked them profusely and ran off to write James and explain the situation. After sending her owl off, she had nothing to do but wait for his reply. In the mean time, she was at the window just in time to see Tarin and her parents get home.

As Tarin lugged her trunk towards her house, she happened to glimpse at Renee in the window. For the first time in awhile, her eyes didn't narrow with dislike. She looked at her plaintively, while Renee returned her stare blankly. Finally, she looked away and Tarin went into her house.

The girls didn't interact after that. James wrote back the next morning, saying his parents would love to have her and couldn't wait to meet her parents. Satisfied, Renee's parents agreed to join them for lunch when they dropped Renee off later that week.

The week passed slowly, with Renee staying inside most of the time to avoid running into Tarin. Apparently, Tarin didn't share the same scruples. She was always coming and going, and more often than not, Renee saw Amos Diggory come over when her parents were out. According to rumours around school, they had started dating again just before holidays.

Finally, the end of the week came and it was time to go to the Potter's. They were surprised to find his house was more like an estate with a decent amount of land. They were greeted by Sirius and James at the door, who then guided them to the patio in the back, where Mr. and Ms. Potter were waiting.

His parents were elderly, but seemed perfectly genial and definitely energetic enough to deal with James and Sirius. The two boys were on their absolute best behavior, clearly trying to make a good impression on Renee's parents.

Lunch went smoothly, and soon Renee's parents were leaving, feeling assured their daughter was in good hands. Grinning, Renee closed the door on her parents. "Well, Mr. Potter, Mr. Black, I see you two have finally learned to behave like rational creatures."

Grinning back at her and easily relaxing, they said, "'Course not!"

Mrs. Potter was just finishing picking up from lunch. Seeing the normal mischievous light returning to the boys eyes, she said "Well, kids, go do whatever it is you guys do these days. And, Renee dear, don't let these hooligans bother you too much."

Renee smiled. "Oh, don't worry, Mrs. Potter. I can handle these buffoons."

Smiling fondly at the children, she said, "Well, dear, I wish you luck", and she made her retreat to the kitchen.

The boys came to stand before her, arms crossed. "You can handle us, eh?"

She grinned. "Yes, I can."

James shrugged, giving up. "Eh. You probably can."

But Sirius wouldn't give up that easily. Without a word, he picked her up and threw her in the pool.

She sputtered while the boys laughed. Then she sighed in defeat and said without thinking, "Why do I always end up soaking wet when I'm with you?"

They both colored, remembering the last time they had gone swimming. James, oblivious to their discomfort, said, "Wait, what? Has Sirius thrown you into my pool before?"

Hiding her face while she climbed out of the pool, she answered nonchalantly. "Hm? Oh, no. He just might've pushed me into the lake before." Making an effort to appear unaffected, she grinned at Sirius. "Git."

He acted normal, too. "Hey, watch who you're calling a git, you punk."

He went to ruffle her hair, but seemed to think better of it, clenching his fist at his side instead. James wasn't fooled, though, but he just made a mental note to ask Sirius later and pretended not to notice. "Okay, then. Want to get dried off and unpacked? We can go swimming for real later."

She nodded and followed him into the house and to the room he showed her. "Thanks, James. I'll unpack and be down in a bit."

She unpacked slowly, wanting some time to think. Sirius confused her. She hadn't forgotten about that kiss a couple weeks, but it still confused the hell out of her, too. And his behavior at the pool… Well, it was obvious he hadn't forgotten about it either. But what were they going to do about it?

She thought about her feelings for him. They had been team mates for years, friendly, but not really close. Then that whole Tarin thing had made them really good friends, but definitely only platonic. And then, he had kissed her. And now they were… She didn't know. Obviously, they were still close. She considered him one of her best mates and she knew he thought of her the same way. But maybe he felt something else?

She wasn't very knowledgeable about guys and relationships, most of her knowledge having come from observing Tarin's love life. Looking back, she realized that probably wasn't the best thing to go off of.

She flopped down on the bed, distressed. Then, she decided she was being ridiculous. She didn't even know if Sirius liked her like that. He might've just been embarrassed to remember kissing her. He probably hadn't been completely sober anyway. This was ridiculous. She resolved to actually forget about their kiss. It hadn't meant anything, he'd said so himself, and they were just friends. She was putting way too much thought into it anyway.

Renee went back downstairs and found the boys out by the pool again.

"Ray! Where's your suit?" James demanded.

"Well, Jamesie, I wasn't that by 'later' you meant as soon as I unpacked," she complained. Seeing they already had their trunks on, she laughed. "I'll be right back, let me change."

The next few weeks went by in a blur of fun, swimming, and adventures in the nearby Muggle village. Soon Remus wrote to say he'd be visiting for a week or so. Things slowed down once he was there; his presence was more calming and they couldn't all four fit under James' Invisibility Cloack.

Sirius and Renee ended up hanging out by themselves a lot, through no effort on their part - they were simply both night owls. Renee had decided to keep things platonic and stuck to it adamantly.

One night, they were hanging out by the pool. Staring at the moon light bouncing off the water, they were both reminded of the night they had kissed.

"Sirius?" Renee asked softly.

"Yeah, Ray?" He replied, a smile in his voice. He and Remus had adopted James' nickname for her.

"I know you don't like to talk about it, but are you really over Tarin? You've seemed better lately, but I just want to make sure," Renee said, unsure of how he'd react.

He let out a deep breath. "I really, and truly am. I still don't like to talk about it, like you said, but even that's getting better. I can honestly say it's been at least a couple weeks since I thought about her much at all."

She smiled. "I'm glad, Sirius."

He turned to her. "I want to thank you, Ray." Seeing her confused look, he explained, "I think I'd still be down about it if it weren't for you. And the guys, of course," he tacked on.

She turned to face him, a smile on her face. "I'm just glad I could help, Sirius. I hated seeing you depressed."

He gave her a hug. "I'd say the same thing, but I don't think I've ever seen you even remotely sad."

She laughed and broke their hug. He gave her a small, understanding smile, then pressed. "But really, are you ever sad? I've seen you mad, happy, and exasperated, generally at me, but I don't think I've ever seen you sad."

"Of course I get sad, Sirius. I'm only human," she said with a laugh.

"But when?" He pressed, "When has Renee Gray, one of the happiest people I know, even been sad?"

She was surprised; people generally said she seemed calm, not necessarily happy. "I think I was sad that one time, when I was five and I lost my teddy bear…"

They laughed. When Sirius seemed to be waiting for her to go on, she sighed and complied. "Well, I don't really cry a lot, or well, even get sad, but I cried after Tarin and I fought."

He looked surprised. She continued. "I know it was stupid, because she'd been horrible and I didn't even want to be her friend anymore… But we were best mates, you know? Even though I knew we couldn't be friends any more, it hurt to realize that all those years of friendship were just ruined."

He squeezed her hand. "I guess I'm not the only one she hurt, eh?"

She chuckled weakly. "She's a tricky one, that's for sure."

They settled into a comfortable silence before Renee asked, "So what about you, Sirius? Other than the whole Tarin fiasco, you seem pretty happy yourself."

He seemed shocked. "Do I really? I guess I'm a pretty good actor, then."

She looked at him, concerned. He felt the unasked questions. "Last year was a bad year for me… You know that last summer I moved out of my parents' house?"

She nodded.

"Well, that messed me up pretty bad. It's like you said, I was glad to get out of there, but it was like saying goodbye to my whole childhood."

She smiled at him sadly. "Unfortunately, I know what you mean."

"You know, I don't really regret the whole Tarin thing. Don't get me wrong, it hurt a lot, but it also, well, taught me some things I needed to learn." He grinned, "Besides, we never would've become as good of friends as we are without it."

She grinned back at him. Staring at each other, their grins slowly faded. Sirius leaned towards her hesitantly. She didn't recognize the look in his eyes; if she had, maybe she would've stopped him.

He closed the distance between them; their lips pressed together. His arms went around her, hers were moving on their own towards his hair. By the time she registered what was happening, they were entangle together.

Gasping, she retreated out of his arms. Sirius protested and moved towards her again. She held him off until he stopped trying.

He looked at her, his eyes fathomless. "Why?"

"Why?!" she demanded, "Because, Sirius, we are just friends."

"Clearly, we aren't, Renee," he said, his voice uneven. "Because I don't know if you noticed, but we were just kissing. And I liked it. A lot. And judging by your reaction, you did too."

She took a couple of deep breaths and collected her thoughts. "Sirius, I don't want to ruin our friendship. It's rather nice as it is."

He protested. "Who said anything about ruining our friendship?"

She sighed. "Sirius, we can't just snog then go back to being friends like nothing happened. Remember how that worked last time?" She added sarcastically.

He looked surprised, then laughed. Seeing her offended expression, he quickly stopped. "Is that what you think this is? Is that what you think I want?"

Her hurt had given over to confusion. He slowly drew close to her, his palms out in surrender. "Renee Gray. You silly child. I don't want to just snog you and go back to life as normal. I want to snog you again and again. I want you to be my girlfriend."

Renee sat down on one of the pool chairs. "Oh. Oh. And, er, when did you reach this conclusion?"

Grinning, he sat down beside her. "Oh, I think it's been coming on for awhile, but it really hit home the first day you came to James'. The sly dog, he knew something was up and so he asked me about it. Somewhere between telling me I was a jackass and threatening to kill me, he asked 'What're you going to do about it?' Then I realized what I wanted to do about it. Which is pretty much when I decided that I rather liked you a lot."

Renee didn't know what to say. She couldn't even identify her feelings. It felt like there was a whirlwind inside of her. "Oh."

Sirius grinned, amazingly nonchalant. "Say something else, Ray."

She wasn't really capable of thinking much at the moment, so coherent words seemed out of the question. "What am I supposed to say, Sirius?"

Suddenly, he was right in front of her, no longer seeming very nonchalant. "I want you to say yes. I want you to say you want to be my girlfriend."

Her emotions swirled around her violently. The overwhelming one, the one that nearly blocked out the others, was happiness, which really only left her with one answer.

"Well, okay then, Sirius."

AN:/ Okay, so I think I've changed a lot since I wrote this piece originally. Because the notes I have on my paper are more like 'Awh'. And I'm more like 'Gross, how sickly sweet and unrealistic.' I think more life experience has changed my views. I would rewrite this to reflect what I actually think would happen now, but I am trying to preserve my original story, as the me of two years ago wanted it written. So, tell past me what you think of my first piece of uber fluff.

P.S. - Virtual kudos to anyone who recognizes the TINY Pride and Prejudice (2005 movie version) reference towards the beginning of this chapter.