A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed again :) You're all totally awesome!

The phone rang, interrupting my deep thoughts on how to show Edwardo off to the school. It would have to be subtle, of course, maybe writing in huge graffiti 'Edwardo totally loves Bella Duck' or 'Bella+Edwardo=together forever… literally'.

"Hi!" I answered the phone. The person on the other end greeted me back, and the voice sounded familiar. I couldn't think of the name because her last name wasn't Sullen.

"So, uh, what's up… um… sorry, what's your name again?" I said back. I was pretty sure it started with a J and was generic so no one could as Mary S- awesome as me, but I still couldn't think of it.

"It's Jenna," Jenna told me. Oh, right, her…

I hung up the phone.

"So, Dad, I was at the Sullen's house today. By the way, Edwardo and I are dating and it'll probably last forever, because most high school relationships always last really long," I explained without any warning. Why did Charles look so shocked?

Seriously, what parent freaks out when they realize their kid has been secretly dating someone? Charles was an excellent parent most of the time, never spending any time with me and accepting all my lies, but this was just unbelievable.

"Edwardo Sullen?!" he gasped. I nodded slowly.

"Bella… ARE THE SULLENS VAMPIRES?! I can't allow a vampire in this house! I'm warning you, I bought a whole church with crosses we can hide out in! I bought a house in Italy we can move to! Everyone's tan there, there's a lot of churches and there's a ton of garlic-covered food!" Charles threatened.

"Explains why the most powerful vampire family lives in Italy," I mused.

Wait… he bought a whole church AND a house in Italy? No wonder he freaked out when every one of my mother's spousal support checks mysteriously got "lost in the mail".

Suddenly, Charles left the room. When he came back, he was armed with a flaming pitchfork. I gasped. I couldn't let anyone mar the pale, suspiciously sparkly, creamy, beautiful, angelic, amazing, fierce, awesome, cool, pretty, and vampire-y skin of Edwardo Sullen.

"He's a werewolf!" I lied quickly, "He's an albino one, which is why he's pale and not an Indian!"

"Oh, okay," Charles visibly relaxed, "I'm so proud of you, Bella! Why don't we celebrate by getting you your very first motorcycle? As long as you don't hallucinate, I'm sure it'll be fine! Then again, it's you we're talking about."

"Well, Edwardo's coming in about 2 seconds, sorry for not telling you, and we're playing baseball," I explained in a rush. Charles narrowed his eyes.

"Wait, don't vampires play baseball? Actually, nah, that's too ridiculous for words."

Thank the vampire god he didn't figure it out.

"Hey, Bella? You must really like him to agree to play baseball," Charles said. I nodded in agreement.

"Well, he's pretty rich," I explained.

Edwardo took me away in his Jeep, and I realized we were going to run part of the way.

Shit, what if Edwardo ran so fast that my Handbook to Becoming a Vampire as Quickly as Possible fell off? It had so many useful tips, like "Marry and have a half vampire child that nearly kills you, so he'll HAVE to turn you into a vampire! And whatever you do, just avoid the name Renesme." Dang, I thought Renesme was a cute original name. Once Jacob told me he had a fantasy about a baby named Renesme. I'm sure he fantasized about running in a field of flowers with her or something nice like that.

"We can't run," I protested weakly. Then Edwardo leaned in and breathed on me. He was doing something I constantly forgot to do so effortlessly, and I envied him for it.

"Yes. We. Can." I gave in instantly, because… well, he was standing really close to me, OK?

"We're here." Edwardo smirked. He does that a lot.

Before the baseball game started, I talked to Esme.

"I'm the mother figure," Esme was saying, "basically, I give sage advice. For example, you're what Edwardo wants for some weird reason, so go for it. Oh, and don't name your future baby Renesme." Why does everyone hate that name?! The two names Renee and Esme go nicely together!

"You sound like me when I'm talking to my mom!" I said happily.

Suddenly, I saw a bunch of blurs and someone called, "OUT!" They had started the game.

"AND THAT'S THE GAME!" Emmett yelled. Wait, what? It was over already?

"Who won?" I asked, confused.

"Me," Edwardo answered. He glared at everyone else, whispering, "Just go along with it, always works with the ladies," to the rest of the vampires.

"WAIT! I see a vision of three vampires. They're normal vampires, and are therefore evil!" Alice interrupted. Oh my god… this was it, wasn't it? The dying I had talking about in the Preface?

Oh wait, there goes the suspense, there's three more books.

Love it? Hate it? Tell me!