Title: When Curves Were Straight 7?
Author: Shadowfax27
Fandom: CSI: Miami
Pairing: Eric/Ryan
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Me no own. You no sue. Okay?
Beta: Mistakes make me human…

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Chapter 7 – Footprints Of A Silent Promise

Take me back to my sweet la vida
Find my love, my dolce vida
Show me where I need to go
Donde esta, mi chico latino?

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Sighing in relief, Eric added, "Thank you… both of you. And please don't treat Ryan any differently now that you know the truth. I don't want him suspecting that you guys know or that I told you about him."

And with that, Eric turned to leave the morgue, relieved that both women had promised to keep the information he had given them under the table, and smiling blissfully to himself as he recalled the kiss he had so passionately shared with Ryan.

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As expected and certainly out of respect for Eric's wishes and Ryan's desire to be recognized on his own apart from Speed's memory and friendship, neither woman confronted Ryan about the truth they now know, nor did they tell anyone else about it. Instead, they did their best to act as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened, much to the relief of Eric.

And true to his form, Ryan went to work and went on about his daily business, completely oblivious to the fact that his secret was finally out – his team already knew the truth about his friendship with Speed.

And in the days that passed after their initial confrontation and beachside confession, Eric and Ryan's relationship inside and outside of work improved steadily and seemed to be on the mend, much to the delight of Alexx, Calleigh, and Horatio, and the relief of the rest of the lab.

And even though neither man attempted to broach that sensitive subject of 'should they?' or 'shouldn't they?' get together, both carefully dancing around the issue, even as their feelings for each other had obviously been rekindled again and had now grown into a full fledged flame, neither man also dared to forget that night at the beach, where implied and unspoken promises were exchanged under the half-lit moonlight, each holding onto the very real possibility of having something more between them… one day.

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"Did you?" Ryan finally managed to ask, still looking down.

He felt Eric's fingers lift up his chin gently, forcing him to meet his eyes, and he was surprised to find warmth there and a faint glimmer of remembrance as a small smile settled on the older man's lips.

"No…" Eric replied softly. "But it did cross my mind too," Eric confessed as well.

Shock registered in Ryan's eyes until Eric leaned down and captured his mouth once more, reassuring him that he was indeed telling the truth and that there was no need to be embarrassed now that they know what their mutual friend, Speed, had secretly but purposefully done to try to get them together.

And for the space of that moment, the doubt and the fear that had Ryan leaving in a hurried and angered mess before was now instantly drowned out by the sound of lips and tongue colliding before the crashing waves, watched by the billions of stars winking in hushed conspiracy under the dimly lit spotlight of the half-moon.

By the time Eric had reluctantly released Ryan's mouth to refill his lungs with much needed air, he could feel an unusual swelling in his chest as he found himself immediately missing the taste of Ryan's kiss. Keeping his eyes closed, he leaned his forehead against the shorter man, and even without looking, he could sense the blush creeping up on Ryan's face and the shy smirk that was now tugging on his lips.

"What do we do now?" Eric found himself asking softly before he could stop himself.

"I don't know," came Ryan's whispered reply.

Pulling his head back to look deeply into Ryan's green depths, Eric quietly asked, "What do you want from me?"

For a brief moment, Ryan was caught slightly off guard by the gentle, yet brutally straightforward inquiry, and he could only blink in response as his smirk faded. He recovered quickly, however, and took the time to gaze back at the lapping waters near their feet, thinking over the question carefully, before answering.

"Ryan…" he heard the Cuban call his name, and he turned his head to meet his eyes. "Tell me what you want from me," Eric asked him again, still with that gentle urgency in his voice.

"I want to think," Ryan responded simply, delicately. "I need to think…" he paused before adding, "And I need you to give me time."

Giving Ryan a nod and an understanding smile despite his evident disappointment, Eric replied, "Okay."

He could see clearly the relief in Ryan's eyes as he said this, and he found himself cupping his face for the first time, marveling at how truly beautiful this younger man really was.

"Eric…" he heard Ryan whisper his name like a plea to his lips.

And Eric leaned in and answered that plea with a most tender kiss, letting Ryan know that he was willing to give him the time he needed to think about the current and future state of their relationship.

He wanted Ryan to know that he was willingly giving up his control, which was definitely not an easy feat for him to do. And he was letting Ryan have the reins in determining what would become of their affair, even though he desperately hoped that he would choose to give him and their relationship a fighting chance at becoming tangible and something so much more.

"Ryan…" Eric breathed against his lips after he had kissed him for the last time that evening. "I'll be here… Take your time."

And with that promise, both men left the beach together, smiling shyly to themselves as they clung to the feel and the memory of their first shared kiss, and leaving footprints of possibility behind them on the sand.

---

That first week came to an end, and by the following Monday, Eric had noticed a considerable change in Ryan all of a sudden. At first, he thought that perhaps the young man just didn't get enough sleep or maybe he just hadn't been feeling well. Ryan had been unusually quiet, and he seemed to have a faraway look on his face whenever there was a lull in his work, which wasn't often, all things considered.

It wasn't that Ryan couldn't seem to focus on his job. On the contrary, he tried to keep himself busy with anything and everything, and Eric was beginning to think that perhaps Ryan was trying to keep himself occupied so that he wouldn't have time to think about something… but what, he had no clue.

Did Ryan not want to think about him?

Did he regret what happened that fateful night at the beach?

Did he finally decide that he would be better off on the other side of the fence?

Was Ryan pretending that that night never happened?

Was he thinking that perhaps they were better off ignoring their feelings?

Did he want to return to the way things were between them?

And what about their kiss?

Did he decide that he wanted to forget about that too?

Shaking his head at this barrage of questions, Eric took in a labored breath and tried to quash the gnawing feeling of helplessness, confusion, and impending loss. He didn't want to over-analyze this new development in his relationship with Ryan, assigning meaning where there was none.

Still, he couldn't help but become nervous at the thought that Ryan might decide that he would be better off without him, opting to keep things strictly professional between them.

No.

Eric did not even want to entertain that idea… certainly not after that impassioned kiss.

But he would be lying to himself if he were to declare out loud that the thought didn't scare him in the least. Because as much as Eric would like to think that he was always in control of his relationships, he certainly didn't want to think that he had already lost hope and control of this one, that he had already lost Ryan before he could even have a chance to have him.

Nonetheless, Eric figured that perhaps Ryan was just having a bad week, and he was more than willing to give him the benefit of a doubt. And so, he let Ryan's odd behavior go for now, choosing to keep his mouth shut about his observations regarding the young CSI's uncharacteristic behavior, while hoping that things would go back to 'normal' the following week.

They didn't.

And by the following Monday, a full two weeks after their initial confrontation in Ryan's home, Eric sensed that something was definitely amiss… and it worried him that the younger man might just be slipping away from him.

As each day passed, Ryan had begun to steadily look… depressed? If he had been at least focused while on the clock that first week that he appeared to act strangely, well… things have now taken an uncanny turn for the worse. Ryan now seemed really distracted, distant, and vacant even – the ever-darkening circles around his eyes evidenced his troubled and sleepless nights.

Sure, he was still productive at work and managed, amazingly, to do his job well without messing up or compromising anything. But one would have had to be blind to not notice that contrary to the confident gait he used to stride in, he now walked on in disturbing silence, much like a cracked and emptying eggshell of a man on the verge of shattering.

But what worried Eric even more was the fact that Ryan had begun to carefully avoid the issue of his strange behavior altogether.

And he wasn't the only one who had taken notice.

Much to his dismay and growing irritation, Alexx and Calleigh would continually corner him or pull him aside to ask what was wrong with Ryan and what he had done to upset him. Alexx had even gone so far as to threaten him bodily harm if he had done anything to hurt her 'baby.'

Heck, even Horatio had approached Eric about Ryan's odd behavior, which surprised him even more, given the fact that Horatio's modus operandi was always to approach the source… except this particular time. Perhaps the redhead sensed that there was something more between him and Ryan, that something had unexpectedly developed between them after his initial confrontation of the young CSI. Or perhaps he merely thought that Eric would be the best person to approach Ryan about this 'issue.'

But whatever their thoughts, speculations, or concerns were, Eric could only shrug in honest ignorance, telling them that he was just as confused and baffled about the sudden changes in Ryan, especially when he acted so paradoxically different from just a few weeks ago.

It was as if they were dealing with a different man.

And nobody could figure out why.

Yeah… something was definitely amiss.

The hours turned into days and days turned into weeks, and Eric began to get gravely concerned as Ryan's behavior and condition didn't seem to improve a bit, regardless of how much they spent time together or tried to do something fun.

Eric now figured that Ryan seemed to be 'okay' and close to being his normal self whenever he was distracted by work or other activities. But as soon as those things stopped, he almost immediately reverted right back to being solemn and distant, especially during those times when there were lapses in his daily activities, whenever he wasn't preoccupied with work or something else.

He had cautiously but repeatedly tried to approach Ryan about it, but each time the younger man just shrugged off his questions and skillfully redirected their conversation to something else, even as he didn't bother to address any of Eric's concerns.

But Eric knew better, and it didn't take him being a CSI to know when Ryan felt uncomfortable and nervous all of sudden, before he would plaster on a fake smile on his face and hurriedly try to distract him with another topic.

Eric never could guess why Ryan always avoided the topic, but he was sure glad that at least, the younger man hadn't gotten angry with him for those 'few' times he had attempted to get him to talk. Sure, there had been a time when he, himself, had gotten so frustrated that he had almost made Ryan angry with him for being so damn persistent.

He had seen the icy steel glare of Ryan's eyes replace the normally warm hues that were there. He had heard the sudden sharp intake of his breath that last time he had attempted to bring up the subject again. And he had been the beneficiary of that cool and warning tone Ryan only used when he was about to be pushed into the brink of anger.

Nonetheless, Ryan managed to control his raging emotions and to put on that icy smile when he had told Eric to "just drop it."

And so, once again, Eric did…

He dropped it despite Horatio's counsel.

He dropped it despite Calleigh's protests.

He dropped it despite Alexx's threats.

And he dropped it despite his own concerns.

But now the question that had been haunting his mind was: how much worse could it get before Ryan got better? Especially when Ryan seemed to only get worse.

Weeks turned into a full month, and had it not been for the fact that Ryan was indeed alive, breathing and talking and working in the flesh, Eric would've thought that he was part of the walking undead.

And still, Ryan refused to talk about what was consuming his thoughts, what was bothering him so much that it was causing him to behave so strangely.

What in the world was eating Ryan Wolfe alive?

He knew that he should say something to the younger man, address the situation before it got completely out of hand. But what was he supposed to do? Ryan had stubbornly shrugged him off every single time, and for the first time, Eric was afraid to push his luck further with the young CSI.

He had already told Alexx and Calleigh to back off, fearing that their questions and concerns might push Ryan over the edge. And even though he was grateful that they had kept their mouths shut in front of Ryan, they, on the other hand, weren't so gracious to him and didn't spare him any mercy, telling him that he needed to confront Ryan once and for all before something terrible happened to him.

Eric had caught their drift.

Smiling despite of their threats, he found himself hugging both Alexx and Calleigh, appreciating their concern for Ryan and their support of their friendship-relationship.

"Now, you go in there and take care of my baby," Alexx prodded, turning Eric around and giving him a firm push towards the door. "I expect to see good results by tomorrow," she added lightly but warningly as he was finally forced out of the morgue

And with one last nod and a silent promise, Eric turned around, went into the locker room, grabbed his things, and headed towards the parking lot in search of his car.

Ryan should've been home for at least an hour by now. Horatio had actually taken the young CSI into his office just a few hours ago and told him firmly to go home and to take the next two days off to sort out what was troubling him, despite the younger man's protests, anger, and evident offense at what his boss might be implying with this forced leave of absence.

Eric had watched in shock and in helplessness from the sidelines as Ryan stormed out of Horatio's office in an enraged huff. He didn't dare stop the younger man nor did he dare to get in his way. He just stood there with his mouth agape at the sudden and drastic turn of events, unable to move or to say anything until he had felt the familiar presence of the redhead next to him.

"Go to him, Eric," Horatio had said simply.

He had given his boss an incredulous look then, as if to ask whether the Lieutenant had lost his mind and had suddenly acquired the inexplicable urge to throw Eric and feed him to the Wolfe. But the redhead merely gave Eric an encouraging smile as he took the file from his hands.

"Talk to Ryan, Eric," Horatio said again, softer this time. "I'll see you in a couple of days."

And with that, Horatio turned around and went back into his office, leaving Eric to ponder what he should do next, even as his legs unconsciously carried him into the morgue to talk to Alexx and Calleigh.

Now, he found himself in his car, parking in the driveway in front of Ryan's home. His grip on the steering wheel hadn't loosened up a bit, and he was surprised that he had made it to his destination in one solid yet trembling piece, considering his body had been on autopilot and his mind had been preoccupied with thoughts of Ryan and the events of the day during the entire drive.

He hadn't decided yet whether this whole thing was a good idea.

He hadn't decided yet what he should or should not do.

Truth be told, he was still shaken up about seeing Ryan so blatantly furious, and, dare he say it, he was also a bit afraid to confront his colleague when he was still in his livid state. He could only hope that Ryan had already managed to calm down enough, given the few hours head start he had.

But that still didn't ease Eric's nerves.

He looked out the window, noticing the sun begin to set in the horizon, casting the same orange-purple hue across the sky, even as traces of the foreboding black and blue began to creep up from afar. And Eric couldn't help the sinking feeling he had in his heart and in the pit of his stomach.

Would this confrontation irrevocably set his friendship back with Ryan?

Would it take things back to the way they were, hostile and filled with competitive animosity?

Would it steal his chances of having something deep and tangible with the younger man?

Would it ruin what they could possibly have between them for good?

With a tremulous breath, Eric reached for his keys and shut off his engine. He closed his eyes, resting his head against the steering wheel as he shook his head in dismay, taking in the silence that now enveloped him in the car.

This wasn't supposed to turn out this way. His relationship with Ryan was supposed to improve, and given time, he was supposed to find the courage to take it to the next level.

How the hell did it come to this?

How did things get so bad that he found himself being the one who had to confront Ryan again and possibly risk the unfortunate chance that what he had hoped would happen between them eventually would never come to fruition because he had to be the bearer of confrontation and, therefore, conflict?

It was a burden he didn't necessarily want to shoulder at the moment. But it was also a burden that he knew only one person had a right to assume – him.

Damn!

Why couldn't things just remain simple and uncomplicated with Ryan?

Why did his heart have to fall for someone so mysterious and enigmatic and yet so amazingly beautiful at the same time?

Why did he agree to do this?

And why did he feel as if he was walking right into a death trap, with his head up on the chopping block?

He sat up and leaned against the seat, taking in another tremulous breath as he opened his eyes to stare at Ryan's door intently. He was still doubting himself, still having second thoughts in his mind, even as his heart pounded with vigor in his chest, and the two little voices inside his head began to debate with each other about whether or not he should get out of his car and knock.

It was at that moment that he wished that his friend, Speed, were there to guide him, to give him a swift kick in the ass, to tell him exactly what he needed to do, and to yell at the voices in his head to shut the hell up.

He missed him, now more than ever, and he could only imagine how much Ryan must be missing him too.

"Damn it, Speed… where are you?" he found himself asking amidst the heavy and humid silence. "Tell me…"

What would Speed do?

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TBC

Let me know what you think. Reviews are much loved!

A/N: Lyrics taken from Gerri Halliwell's "Mi Chico Latino." Mwahahahaha! I blame the plot penguin for this evil cliffhanger. But I do promise (for real this time) that the answers to everything lie in the next chapter, where everything will sort of come full circle and anything that hadn't been revealed and explained since the beginning of the fic will finally make sense. Stay tuned!