A/N: This is a continuation of the previous chapter for agent-HAWKEYE. I want to continue to thank everyone who reads, reviews, favorites, or follows this story. I also want to thank Shadowsontherun for reading a portion of this and affirming that it was funny. Enjoy!

"Bruce, I see you've managed to bring back the Capcicle in one piece. Time to go get Thor."

Bruce, Tony, and Steve started to go to Thor's room. They got there, but there was a horrible noise coming from inside.

"Dude, what the hell is that noise?"

"I don't know Tony, but it is awful! I volunteer Steve to go check."

"Why me?"

Tony turned is head to Steve. "Because you are the most indestructible out of the three of us. My suit is too noisy, and I'm too tired to play with the other guy, no offence Bruce."

"None taken."

"Well, seeing as we settled that-" Tony went to push Steve towards the door. Unfortunately for Tony, the super soldier was very fast on the uptake, and he dodged. Thus sending Tony into Thor's room. It was dark, and Tony was praying that whatever was in there wasn't going to kill him...or scar him for life. The noise was so much louder in Thor's room. Then, it stopped.

"Man of Iron, what art thou doing in my chambers?"

"Wait, how did you know it was me?"

"You are the only Midgardian who has a built in torch."

"Oh, well...that explains that." Tony mentally facepalmed. "Get dressed Thor, we need to talk to you."

~10 minutes later~

"Geez, Thor what took you so long?"

"Man of Iron, I don't believe you can judge me for taking so long. It takes you two hours to get dressed. Besides, I had to find my Midgardian clothing in the dark."

"Thor, we've gone over the concept of light switches too many times for this."

"I had forgotten about that. Thank thee Man of Iron."

Tony physically facepalmed.

"Well, now that we're all here, it's time I told you what I have planned." Tony had a devilish smirk on his face. "We're going to mess with the lovebirds."

"Do you think this wise, Man of Iron? Their retaliation is to be feared."

"That's why we're not going to do it. Thor, you're going to get your brother to do it."

"I'm fine with that." Everyone was shocked that the Captain responded positively and quickly. "What? When they find out he did it, they will beat the shit out of him."

Audible gasps! "Did Captain America just cuss?!" Tony's jaw dropped in disbelief.

"Tony, I'm up past my bedtime. I get cranky when I don't go to sleep before 11."

"Okay gramps, we'll be done soon. Now, Thor. Where exactly is your brother? I heard he was serving probation here on Earth."

"No, Man of Iron. The Allfather sent him to the Realm of the Golden Arches."

"Realm of the Golden Arches? He couldn't possibly mean-"

"You got it Steve, Loki's working at a McDonald's!" Tony exploded with laughter. Bruce and Steve soon joined in. Thor was confused.

"What is this McDonald's you speak of?"

"You know those magic swirls you like? Well, everyone else calls them McFlurry's and we get them from McDonald's."

"I see, but I still do not know where my brother is."

"That's okay big guy, I've already found him. Being a hacker is such a great advantage." Tony looked proud of himself. "So, is Bruce or Steve going to get him. There's no way I'm going there. I have to procure supplies for the prank!"

"Speaking of which, what exactly is Loki going to be doing?"

"Well Bruce, Loki is going to be saran wrapping the love birds to their bed with magic so we don't have to risk them waking up from our presence."

"You know, after they beat up Loki, when they find out it was actually us, they're going to murder us."

"Shut it Steve. You're harshing my mellow. Just for that, I'm calling an executive decision that Steve is going to go get Loki. And yes, I can make an executive decision. My tower, my rules. And technically, it's mine because I built it. Now, get to it Capcicle!"

By this point Steve didn't really care. He had had to live in the same building as Tony Stark long enough to know that there comes a time when you just shut up and get things over with. Now was one of those times.

"I'm going; I'm going. At least give me some directions to which McDonald's I'm going to."

Tony told Steve which McDonald's to go to. As soon as he was finished, Steve left on his motorcycle and embarked on his journey to go get Loki. Steve arrived at McDonald's in 20 minutes. He hoped Loki was working as a cashier, he really felt like being a pain in the ass. To Steve's fortune, Loki was indeed working as a cashier, the only cashier. He waited until more cars pulled in and then entered the building. He walked up to Loki. Loki's facial expression was a weird combination of fear, resentment, and curiosity.

"Hello sir. Welcome to McDonald's. How may I be of service?" The ice in his voice was tangible.

Steve heard more people coming in through the door. "I don't know, give me a few seconds to pick what I want." Steve stood, looking intently at the display board. A line started forming behind him.

"Sir, perhaps if you stand aside and let other people who are ready go ahead?"

"No, I know what I want now. I'll have a Big Mac."

Loki began to ring up the order.

"Oh, wait! I changed my mind. I'll just have a chicken sandwich."

"Okay sir." Loki was starting to get pissed off. He really wished that he had the full capabilities of his magic. The Allfather had reduced him to the level of a magician at a child's birthday party.

Ordinarily, Steve would have just stopped there, but he was up past his bed time, and he was extremely cranky. So he repeated that process five more times with different items on the menu. Everyone behind him was extremely annoyed. Of the six people that were behind him, three of them left and had gone through the drive through. Steve decided to stop after he ordered ten apple pies. He loved their apple pies. That, and the fact that he could see Loki's right eye twitching. As Loki put his food on the tray, Steve told him that he needed to speak with him when Loki's shift was done.

As soon as Loki was off duty, he went over to Steve who was sitting on his motorcycle.

"What do you want, mortal? Come to rub my station in my face? You almost got me fired! If I get fired then I have to go be a waiter at Chuck E. Cheese's. See? Now you know what hell I've been through."

"Take it easy. I'm sorry I almost got you fired, but the Avengers need your help with something."

"What is it?"

"I'm not allowed to tell you. You will only find out if you agree to come back to Avengers Tower."

Loki actually thought about this. Perhaps it would lessen the amount of time he had to spend working at that dreaded eatery. Anything would be worth that, especially if the request was given to the Allfather by that oaf which was his "brother."

"Very well, I shall accompany you to this tower, but you will have to bring me in whatever chariot you brought. I am not allowed to have my own transport. Before you ask, yes I've been taking that rotten behemoth of a thing you call a bus."

"Okay. Hop on."

"On what? That thing?"

"What else?"

"Very well then." It took Loki five minutes to finally get on the motorcycle behind Steve, although it did take longer because he originally sat down facing the wrong way. Things were going okay until they pulled onto the road.

"Slow down you madman! Why are you trying to kill me? What did I ever do to deserve this? I don't want to die! Let me off! Let me off! Someone help me! He's driving like a madman! I want to live!"

Steve finally got to a red stoplight. He turned around. "If you keep screaming, so help me God, I will duct tape your mouth shut and you can spend the last 15 minutes of this journey being draped over the back of my motorcycle like a saddle bag!"

Loki was shocked at the Captain's sudden change in temperament. Needless to say, he ceased to comment on Steve's driving. By the time they were back at the Avengers Tower, Steve had developed a twitch in his left eye, and Loki looked like he was about to throw up. Thor, Bruce, and Tony were waiting outside.

Loki got off the motorcycle and fell to the ground. "SOLID LAND HOW I'VE MISSED YOU!"

"Wimp." Steve was less than amused.

"Well well well if it isn't reindeer games. We have a proposition for you."

"What is it you ask of me?"

"We want you to help us play a prank on Clint and Natasha."

"ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME?!"

"Shhh. They might hear you. All we need you to do is use your magic to saran wrap them to their "nest." That's all you have to do."

"I will do it only if you send Thor to Asgard immediately to have him request that my punishment be shortened."

"I would be happy to, brother!"

"Very well. Where is this saran wrap and this...nest?"

"Right this way reindeer games."

Tony led Loki to the outside of Clint's room.

"Just poof in, saran wrap them, and poof out. Then you're done. Oh, and the guest bedroom is one floor down."

So, Loki appeared in the assassin's room. What he found were the two humans that he actually feared cuddling in a "nest" that was made up of various sheets and pillows. Well, he thought, here went nothing.

~The Next Day~

Natasha was waking up. She felt Clint's warm arms around her, but something was different. Oh, that's what it is. Some asshole, probably Tony, saran wrapped them into their nest.

"Clint."

"Huh, what? "

"We've been saran wrapped to the nest."

"I can see that honey."

"Well, it's a pity they forgot something very important."

"And what's that?"

"That a certain pretty assassin sleeps with a knife under their pillow."

"Awww. Do you really think I'm pretty?"

"No Clint." He gave her a pouting puppy face. "I think you're smokin'"

"I can live with that."

"You do."

While bantering flirtatiously, Natasha and Clint cut their way out of the saran wrap.

"Hey Nat, there's a note over here. It says: Most noble warriors of Earth, I did not mean you any harm. This was all Stark's idea. The green one and the soldier were in on it as well. Pity me, please. For I have been working at a McDonald's. You know what type of people I've had to deal with! They told me if I did this, then they would send Thor to talk to the Allfather and get my sentence reduced. If you don't believe my story, I have video evidence! I work at the McDonald's that's 20 minutes away and right across from the Chuck E. Cheese's. I beg of you, please do not harm me. Sincerely, Loki."

"Clint, if that's true, there's nothing to do about Loki, I'd say McDonald's is torture enough. Let me check it out."

"Sure thing. I agree. McDonald's is bad enough."

In five minutes, Natasha had located the correct McDonald's and hacked into their video footage. Surprisingly enough, the God of Mischief for once was not lying. Of course she saved the image of him working as a cashier for future blackmailing purposes.

"Well, he's off the hook. But I'll tell you right now. Tony is gonna pay."

"Honey, I think we need to use some of that ammo that we got yesterday. I'm thinking the painballs."

"Only for Stark. The others don't deserve the paintball treatment yet, I'm thinking water guns filled with ice water and perfume."

"Honey, I love the way you think. Let's get to work."

While Natasha and Clint were setting up for revenge, the others, except for Thor who, true to his word, left for Asgard that night, were sitting in a conference room discussing their success. It was more like Tony bragging about how much of a genius he was for coming up with the plan. Unbeknownst to Tony, Steve, Bruce, and Loki, the pair of assassins had gotten their ammunition and weapons set up very quickly. They were in two separate air vent shafts in the conference room. They had barricaded the doors. There would be no escape.

"You ready honey?"

"Oh most definitely sweetie." Assured that their comm links worked, Natasha aimed her paintball gun. She knew Stark was going to want to kill her for this, but it's not like he would ever be able to manage that, with or without help. She took aim where it would hurt him the most. What? She had no issues striking below the belt.

Natasha took aim, and fired. The next sound heard was a scream, Tony's scream to be exact. This was no manly scream. This was high pitched and loud.

"Oh nice shot honey."

"Thought you'd approve. Shall we continue?"

"Let's wait for them to realize that the doors won't budge first."

"Clint, you know I love it when you're devious."

"I sure do."

Bruce, Steve and Loki huddled over the billionaire. There was a red paint splatter around his nether regions.

"Tony, are you okay?"

In a very high pitched, squeaky voice Tony responded. "Of course I'm not alright! I just got shot in the nuts by a paintball gun at close range."

Bruce went to open the door so he could go get Tony some ice. "Guys, we have a serious problem."

"What?" said a very nervous Steve.

"We can't get out. These doors have been barricaded shut."

"Shit," Steve looked at Loki, "Can you do anything about this?"

"Not at present, I am unable to use my magical abilities during the day, only at night."

"Fat lot of good you were!" Came a squeaky voice.

"Don't go there Stark, this was your own doing."

Overhead, the assassins were loving this.

"You know, Nat, Loki was right. Stark had this coming. Shall we continue?"

"Let's."

With the final confirmation, Natasha and Clint began firing water guns laden with ice water at the unsuspecting men beneath them. The only person who remained unharmed was Loki. Once they were out of water, they moved to the water guns filled with the worst smelling perfumes and colognes that they could find. By the time that they were finished emptying out all of their ammunition, the only person still standing was Loki, but he was coughing very badly.

Loki fell to his knees, clasped his hands together and began shaking them towards the ceiling.

"Thank you oh merciful warriors for sparing me." With that, Loki passed out from the obnoxious perfume fumes.

"Well, Nat, shall we go take down the barricade in front of the door?"

"Yeah. We'll run some fresh air into the conference room once we're out of the vents."

Once the two assassins had gathered their used supplies, cleared the door and run some fresh air into the conference room, they sat down in the living room.

"Clint?"

"Yes honey?"

"Can we go to the Renaissance Festival?"

"Anything for you. Is there a particular reason?"

"I want to buy expensive stuff with Tony's credit card."

"Sounds great. Now he really will be paying. I wonder if they'll have an archery contest."

"You are not dressing up as Robin Hood from Men in Tights."

"Okay. Party pooper."

"Fine! Just this once, you can go as Robin Hood from Men in Tights."

"You're the best, honey."

"And don't you ever forget it."

Epilogue:

Tony's screams were heard throughout Avengers Tower.

"YOU GUYS BOUGHT ALL THAT MEDIEVAL SHIT WITH MY CREDIT CARD?! WE'RE TAKING THAT CATAPULT BACK. YOU TWO DON'T NEED A FREAKING CATAPULT!"