FYH Outtake 5

Alice

So far my brother has called and talked to everyone but me and it kinda hurts. Ok, not kinda, it totally hurts. Was I that much worse than our mother and father that I didn't deserve the same chances and opportunities for forgiveness? I was cruel and, yes, I did said things about him to my friends but it wasn't like any of them would have been his friends anyway. There was a big age gap between us, five years to be exact. I had graduated and moved on to college before he had even started high school. Though maybe some of the people I knew that were younger than me said something but if they did he never said anything to be about it. Not that we ever had anything that would resemble a heart to heart chat. Except that one time and I regret that that was the one time that I listened to him and left it alone.

It was just about Christmas time last year, Jasper and I went out for dinner to a nice restaurant. He was in his first semester of graduate school and was so busy during finals that we didn't have much time to spend together. But I understood, get his doctorate was important to him so it was important to me. At one point I got up to go to the bathroom while he paid the bill and when I stood up to walk away I saw my brother's girlfriend in a heated kiss not far from our table with a guy that was definitely not my brother. I was livid. How could she cheat on my brother like that? Why would she risk getting caught? We were sitting so close to her table that there was no way that she hadn't seen us sitting there when she was seated.

I had to clear my throat three times before I finally got her attention. She didn't even have the decency to look ashamed or guilty, the bitch looked smug. I told her that I was going to tell my brother and my mother what I caught her doing and she laughed at me, telling me to go ahead and try. Edward already knew and there was no way that Esme would believe me.

Jasper grabbed my arm at this point and guided me out of the restaurant and to the car. Jasper drove us straight to my parent's home knowing that I would need to confront this before I could rest. An hour later we were back in the car and I was more distraught than when I arrived. Tanya was right, Edward did know. He knew everything. And apparently this guy I saw her with must have been a new addition to her line up of men. I mean he literally just shrugged it off saying that at least she wasn't bothering him. So then I tried to go to mom.

"Alice, I wasn't expecting you to visit tonight"

"Well, I wasn't planning on it but something happened while Jasper and I were at dinner. Tanya was there-"

"Stop right there young lady. I know that you resent your brother for effect his mistakes has on you and Jasper, but you need to get over it and quit trying to hurt him with lies. Now be a good girl and go home with you husband and quit trying to hurt him by spouting lies about his girlfriend. Besides Irina and Kate told me that Tanya went to bed early with one of her migraines and she hasn't been out of her room all night."

Then she retreated to her bedroom while I stood in the hall dumbfounded.

"It's ok. I'm used to this, Alice. It's just my life and I'll deal with it."

"By ignoring it, Edward? She's cheating and you are just letting her get away with it? You're not going to do anything?"

"There's nothing that I can do. You've just seen mom's stance on this. It's my life and just the way that it is and something that I have to live with. Besides, I have to go to Darthmouth in the fall. I'll get away from her then. I just have to deal and stick it out til then."

"You're going to New Hampshire? There letting YOU go that far? Emmett and I had to settle for school here in Phoenix and you get to go where you want to?" Now I was even more pissed off.

"I never said that I wanted to. I have to. Dad said so. And there is no way that they are going to let her move in with me not being married to her. So that will solve everything. I hope." I gave my brother a hug and left to return home with my husband. We had just gotten married over the summer. My parents had insisted that Emmett and I both wait until we had graduated from college until we married Rose and Jasper and they were adamant that we were not going to live with them unmarried. So I figured we had four years to save Edward. Little did I know how wrong I was.

A few days later we were sitting in the living room on Christmas morning opening gifts. Jasper had given me a beautiful amethyst necklace that I had been wanting and I was giving him a quick thank you kiss when a scream erupted from the other side of the room. I looked over to see Tanya excited, mom beaming with happiness, and Edward looking horrified.

"Be a gentleman and put in on her Edward." Mom admonished him. I don't know how she didn't see it because I did, even from across the room, he had tears in his eyes as he did as he was told. Then mom and Tanya and her sisters launched into planning the wedding and before I knew it Edward was gone from the room.

I went to go find him and talk to him about it. I found him outside on the patio sitting by the pool with his head in his hands.

"You didn't know did you."

"No." He sounded as though he was about to cry.

"Edward, we will find a way to get you out of this. I promise you that."

"Alice, there is no point. You know she is not going to listen. She just doesn't care."

"It's not pointless Edward. This is your life we're talking about here. You don't love her, I know you don't. So why give up and marry that woman without a fight?"

"Penance." Was all he said before getting up and going back into the house and it broke my heart because deep down I knew that I held some of the blame for him thinking that way.

I had been cruel to him growing up, putting him down and calling him names and yes I knew that it was immature but I was just a teenager. And once I "grew up" and started college and got Jasper back I outright ignored him. I was a horrible sister and person.

I was brought out of my memories by then ringing of my phone. I picked it up and looked at the caller ID and oh my God! It was Edward! I was so happy that he finally called that I started crying immediately as I answered.

"OH Edward! I've missed you! I am so sorry!"

"Hey Alice. I'm sorry that I haven't called sooner. I've really just needed time to get my head on straight."

"I know, Edward, I know. I am just so glad that you left."

"What?"

"That didn't come out right. I meant that I'm glad that you found a way out of marrying her and that you are happy. Emmett said you are. Happy I mean. Happier than he's ever seen you and Rose can't quit gushing about how amazing Bella is."

"Alice, slow down." He laughed. "It's ok. I am happy. I'm really and truly happy. I do have to say though that I saw the pics of Tanya and her sisters after you and Rose get to them and I have to say thank you and great job sis!"

"Well, you're welcome little brother, but I do have to confess that it felt damn good to do it!"

"I'll bet it did."

"Mom told us about your last call to her. I had no idea that she had gone that far but she is so sorry and worried that she's pushed you away for good."

"Alice," he sighed.

"Oh God! You're not coming home are you?"

"Not to live. We'll visit though, I promise."

"Yeah. We have to because we're all adults and married now and eventually we're all going to have children. And I don't want to miss out on their lives. And I don't want to lose my brother permanently."

"You won't. I promise you that. But I really need my space. At least for now. I am trying my hardest to forgive and forget but it's not easy Alice."

"I know, Edward, but for what it's worth she is sorry and she is trying. They both are trying with all of us. We're doing family therapy now. Well, last week was the first time and they are going to call you about it. I think mom is but she needs to get up her nerve to make the call. I think she's terrified that you'll say no."

"How is that supposed to work with me not being there?"

"They planned to do it via telephone conference."

"Well, I'll think about it, ok?"

We then agreed to let mom do it on her own and not influence her decision to make the call. She had to man up, so to speak, and do it because she was ready to. Then we ended the call with I love you's and promises of more phone calls soon.