I know I take so long with this story, but I hope to be a bit better now. There's only a few more chapters left.

Thank you for sticking around!

Chapter Five

The two men sat across from each other, separated by the kitchen table. Peeta's eyes were back to their unnaturally kind state, while Gale tried to avoid eye contact. Part of him was embarrassed that the muffin man of all people had gotten the pleasure of seeing him hit rock bottom, while the other half was just too prideful to say sorry after how long it had been. Peeta and Gale had spent an entire week in silence. After a few minutes he couldn't stand the baker's gaze any longer.

"Okay I'm sorry! I'm an asshole and that's why she left me. I'm a selfish piece of shit. You're right I don't deserve any of the amazing things I have now. I deserve to live alone in a fucking shed out in the woods, not even in the woods because I like the woods. Somewhere barren, maybe some arctic wasteland or a desert. I have fucked up in life and to be perfectly honest with you Mellark I have no fucking idea how to get it back on track. She's gone and you're the only person I have left, even though I'm pretty sure I fucked that up too." Now that Gale's started he can't stop and the more he talks the more broken up he gets about the whole thing. He speaks extensively about how he's let down the person he loves the most in the world. His wife. His Madge. His everything. He tells Peeta stories of their newlywed years. About what happened when Madge told him he was going to be a father. Peeta laughs at all the appropriate parts and frowns when necessary as well.

"You know I've never told her about my time with the Mockingjay Militia. I just never could. Those were two separate worlds and I never wanted to bring any of that home. Madge is all light. This beautiful, pure, being to me. How could I tell her that I remember every single person I've killed. That when I close my eyes I see the looks on their faces right when they died. That I can't sleep sometimes knowing I was the cause of that look. Of their deaths. How can I tell that beautiful woman all that? She's-She's-" When the tears threaten to start spilling, Gale takes a deep breath and looks away from Peeta. He can't see him like this.

Peeta gives him a look of understanding before standing up. "Would you like me to call Madge? I think it'd do you both some good to talk." As he passes Gale, Peeta reassuringly pats his shoulder. Gale's thankful that Peeta is a forgiving and patient person.

He can hear Peeta in the other room, speaking low and after a few mintues he returns, phone in hand. He offers the phone to Gale and heads to the guest bedroom to give Gale some privacy.

Gale sighs, before bringing the phone to his ear. "Hello," he says trying not to sound as sad as he really is. She doesn't need to feel guilty for the way he's feeling. For the way he deserves to be feeling. It's not her fault. It's his.

"Hi Gale." Her voice is like coming home to him. This house is nothing without the sound of her voice coming from within it. Without the sound of her padding on the hardwood floors. "How are you? Peeta said-Are you doing okay?" He wondered exactly what had Peeta said to her.

He takes a deep breath before continuing, "I miss you is all, Maddie." A sad smile forms on his face and he's sure the emotion is evident in his voice. Maddie is what he called her when he was feeling particularly affectionate toward her, which was quite often. His feet bring him to their bedroom and he walks in, sitting on her side, which he hasn't allowed himself to touch prior to this moment. He couldn't bring himself to alter any memory of her, anything attached to her, just in case she never came back and that's all he had left of her.

"I miss you too, Gale." She pauses and all Gale can hear is her steady breathing. It's comforting to him to say the least. "What do you miss?" She's fishing for compliments, for the reassurance that he's been missing her. He knows this and it makes no difference to him. If she wants to hear him recite every reason why he misses her then so be it. He'll play along. He wants to play along.

"Well, I miss your laugh, how you grip your knee when a joke particularly tickles your fancy making yours eyes crinkle. I miss the way you smell, like roses and lavender mixed into one and how I think you smell better than any perfume out there. I also like how it sticks to everything you've ever touched because it really helps when I'm feeling really low, like now. Your pillow smells so much like you when I'm about to fall asleep and my eyes are closed it's almost like you're here with me. I miss taking showers with you, and how it takes us twice as long than when we take them separately. I miss seeing you grow each and every day. I really miss that, along with rubbing and kissing your belly. I miss your kisses. Falling asleep next to you every night and waking up to you every morning. I miss seeing your sleepy face in the morning. You look so cute. I miss how grumpy you are with me in the mornings too and how making love in the morning makes you a whole lot less grumpy. I miss the way you look at me while we're making love. Your eyes so filled with love it always makes my heart skip a beat." By this point tears are freely falling down his face and he's sure it's getting a lot harder for Madge to understand what he's saying, but she doesn't say anything. She doesn't stop for clarification. She wouldn't need any clarifications anyway. Madge had always known what Gale was thinking and feeling even before he knew himself; she was intuitive like that.

"Gale?" Her voice was small and soft, as if she were about to ask a question that had an answer she wasn't sure she wanted to know. The fact that she was crying as well was not lost on him, but she was trying to hide it anyway. Her efforts were very much wasted. He could still hear the sniffles, even if she turned her head away from the phone when she breathed through her nose. Her voice always gave her away. It got a smidgen lower and the words that formed her sentences were spread out more than normal. There were a lot of pauses as well.

"Yeah?" He answered back, wiping the tears off his face.

"Have you been doing better? Peeta told me you two weren't talking for a bit."

A bit made it sound like it was a couple of days at most. A week was a lot longer than a bit. He would thank Peeta for that later. If Madge knew he had stopped talking to Peeta, a guest in their house, and a great friend for taking time out of his own life to care and be there for a friend, who didn't really like him that much to begin with then she'd have his ass. Scolding him for being so rude to Peeta who didn't deserve such treatment. Gale knew it was true too. Peeta was a stand up guy even if he was kind of a goody two shoes. He would be so lucky to have Madge scold him for being rude to Mellark, just to have her in front of him, near him.

"Well I-I I've been doing a lot better. I've been getting to work on time and getting everything done early too. Boss noticed too, so I guess I've been doing something right. He's very willing to give me paternity leave for a while when the baby's born too, since I've been doing so well. He said I could take a bit longer if I work from home, not a lot just some so I'm not so swamped when I come back. Not so much that I won't be able to help you or nothing. I don't know if you'd want that or if you'll be back in District Two by then, but yeah."

"Don't take this the wrong way, but I was thinking about having the baby here, in District Twelve. Your mom offered to help since I'm new at this and all. I could use all the help I can get, don't you think?"

Gale couldn't help but want to cry all over again. Was this some nice way for Madge to say she didn't want him at the birth? She had always been too kind for her own good.

Was this the straw that broke the camel's back so she was finally done with him, babying him with his inability to speak or deal with his problems as an adult?

"Oh," was all he said though. If that's what she really wanted, Gale would support her. She deserved his support since there wasn't much more he could give her without failing in the long run.

"It's just that my mother's not around anymore and your mother's happy to step in to help me with the adjustment period. Katniss and Thom too. Most of our friends and family are here and I think it'd be nice to have them around-"

He stopped her before she could continue. "I understand Madge."

She started up again. "You're going to come here too, right? I mean only if you want. Work is important too. I was just wondering." Her voice went back to being small again. Afraid of rejection, though for the life of him Gale couldn't figure out why. Gale wanted a family. It had always been his dream to have a big family and this child was the start of it. How could he not want to see his first unborn child? He could hardly stand being away from his wife and their son now and he wasn't even born yet.

"Oh yeah, definitely." It felt like a weight was lifted off his shoulders; he could finally breathe again.

They continued talking all throughout the night until Madge was too sleepy to continue and fell asleep on the phone. That didn't stop Gale from listening to her slow and steady breathing from the other line. When he closed his eyes, he could almost feel her body next to his. Her breathing mixed with her scent on her pillow was more comforting than he could imagine, but it was her body that made all the difference. The way her small body fit perfectly with his much bigger frame. It wasn't the same if he couldn't muzzle his nose into her neck and plant feather-light kisses all over her graceful neck. Since he had learned she was pregnant, one hand was always on her stomach, rubbing it soothingly, loving the way it felt under his fingertips. All of these details reminded him that she wasn't here with him, thus reminding him of why she had left in the first place. These constant reminders helped to keep him in check. He could only hope they would continue to help when or if she ever returned.

Reviews are much appreciated and will help me churn out the next installment a lot faster!