Once again, I suck. But I hope this 7500 word chapter makes up for that. So I am two weeks late... *silently prays you won't hate me* The ending here will probably really make up for it though ;) This is all the authors note you get because I want you to read the chapter!

Disclaimer: If I wrote Chuck, I would churn out episodes much faster. And probably would get my tenses right as well.

Chapter 5

Sarah could learn to enjoy this life. Waking up wrapped in someone's warm and loving arms and snuggling back into them without worry of knives of gunplay; having a normal job, a normal boyfriend, a normal life.

These past few weeks with Chuck sleeping next to her have been great. If she gets cold, she has someone to snuggle up to. If one of them has had a bad day, they can talk about it. If they're fighting, Sarah always tries to iron everything out before they go to sleep. And when Chuck had inevitably gotten sick after Sarah had, nursing him back to health wasn't completely repulsive either. She actually found it quite nice to be relied on in more than a "get the job done" capacity. Plus he looked so adorable cuddled up in bed.

They are getting closer, and Sarah hopes this is what their relationship was like before, because she is really happy. She still can't remember too many memories, sure bits and pieces and flashes every so often, but it is the new memories that are doing it for her. Coming home to Chuck already placing dinner on the table, waking up at 5AM to see him in the middle of a raid on his Xbox with Morgan, taking walks along the beach just to pass the time, or watching his face light up every time she says something remotely positive about "them". It's these new memories that are really making Sarah believe she is in love with this adorable, charming, loving nerd.

And then there is the kissing. Oh, the kissing. It is becoming one of Sarah's most favourite pastimes. And she thought she had enjoyed kissing Chuck on the couch? Well the bed is much, much nicer. Hands can roam, mouths can linger, and it is much larger than the couch allowing for a better body to surface ratio. Oh, god yes, Sarah could definitely get used to the bed kissing, and more… though they've never gone any further than that.

It's not that Sarah doesn't want to – in the past week or so her body seems to be screaming for more touching, more feeling, more everything. It's just Chuck… he seems to want everything to move at Sarah's pace. To move slowly, to make sure she is comfortable. And Sarah is good at reading people. She knows he wants her, has wanted her, for a really really long time now. But he is too nervous to ask, perhaps too scared he will be coming on too strong and scare her mind away. But it is quite clear to Sarah now that she will never be scared away – she is in it for the long haul.

Sarah snuggles back into Chuck, a small smile growing on her face as she realizes just how much Chuck wants her. Or maybe it's just the morning. Regardless, Sarah feels quite ready for what can (and hopefully will) come next. She feels Chuck stir behind her, and smiles to herself as she pulls his arms tighter around her waist.

"Good morning." She says, pushing the boundaries and moving herself even further into Chuck's space, desperately hoping this will work.

"Good morn-" Chuck abruptly pauses in his mumbling, obviously noticing how blatant his arousal is. He takes a deep breath and awkwardly finishes with a high pitched "-ing."

Sarah internally lets out a groan, realizing Chuck is not really going to be up for anything today. To save herself the secondhand embarrassment (which, let's face it, her husband-slash-steady-live-in-boyfriend is ashamed to have a boner in front of her. This is already embarrassing) she rolls over, moving their lower halves farther apart but keeping their chests and faces close.

"I should…" Chuck says, an arm moving from its spot around Sarah's back to motion to the door.

She leans in to place a quick, closed mouth kiss on his lips. "You know, Chuck, we can talk about this." Sarah says upon pulling away. She hopes she sounds more like the Sarah he used to know, the one who was there through everything and anything.

"Talk?" Chuck says, his body already moving out from under the covers and his arm reaching for the robe hanging off the computer chair. "Talk about what? I just have to go… freshen up." He stands up, his front never facing Sarah, and heads out the door as quickly as humanly possible.

Once she hears the bathroom door close and the water start running, Sarah lets out a loud groan and collapses back onto the sheets. How hard can it possibly be to get your husband in bed?

Chuck left for work almost immediately after he finished showering, leaving a note and some pancakes still warm on the table for Sarah. The warm breakfast was mocking Sarah, so instead she grabbed some bread and threw it in the toaster oven, refusing to eat Chuck's pity pancakes.

She watches her bread slowly turn brown, mind wandering over the past few weeks and why Chuck is still having such a weird reaction to them being intimate. It has to be something to do with her, something to do with her memory being gone, as she remembers Casey teasing her (yeah, still weird to think about) that they used to go at it like bunnies. It's almost as if she is that piece of bread, starting out plain and whole, and slowly toasting as Chuck warms her heart.

Sarah leans onto the counter, her head falling between her hands. That is the dumbest analogy she has ever come up with. Sarah isn't bread, and Chuck isn't a damn toaster. Although… if Chuck is turning her into toast, then why on earth won't he eat her? Okay, never mind, her brain just topped itself. Sarah really should eat something.

There has to be an easy solution to this, but what? She used to be so good at reading people, so good at understanding their every move. As a spy, she was trained to know what her targets wanted, who they wanted, how to manipulate and seduce them. Wait… that's it! Chuck needs to be seduced! Why didn't she see this before?

With new vigor Sarah dashes into the bedroom, pulling out different pieces of underwear from her drawers. There are some nice bras, negligees, babydolls, but nothing that screams "do me now!" and nothing that Sarah would've warn on a seduction mission. She must've gotten rid of most of it in her haste to get away from Chuck's smothering so many weeks ago. Sarah does find one bustier that looks like the flattering pieces she used to wear, only it has adjoining wings. Wings? Is Chuck into that? Not wanting to question anything, Sarah files it away for later and continues searching.

Next she tries the closet, only coming away with a gaggle of black cat suits, clearly only used on missions. That won't work either. Something red in the back catches her eye, but before she can reach it a loud beeping noise pierces her ears.

"Crap! The toast!" Sarah says, dashing back into the kitchen to find the toaster oven smoking in a cloud of black. She quickly unplugs the monstrosity and dumps the toaster in the sink. Using one hand to turn on the cold water, she grabs an oven mitt and opens the toaster. Then she holds her breath and reaches over to open the nearest window.

Oh yeah, Chuck is definitely the toaster. Leaving his mark on her so much that she is burnt to a crisp and in no way salvageable. She is covered in him, and wouldn't want it any other way. Yes, Sarah smiles to herself, this is a much better use of that metaphor.

It takes a minute for Sarah's lungs to clear as the smoke slowly dissipates, and she looks at the burnt remains of what used to be bread. She laughs at herself, and finally Sarah sits at the table and slowly pours syrup onto the pancakes Chuck had made her earlier.

Sarah paces the apartment. It's one o'clock and she needs to get this finished before her four o'clock classes. She stares down at the phone in her hand, starts to dial, and quickly hangs up before she reaches the last number.

What is so wrong with her? Is it really this hard to make friends? To talk to someone? Well, yes, Sarah had apparently been close with Ellie before the brain melting, so much so that Ellie was her maid of honour. So they really must be friends, right? So then why is it so hard to make one stupid phone call?

"Because she knows you," Sarah says out loud. "Or at least she knows the old you. And you don't know her." A groan is released as Sarah collapses on the couch, bringing the phone with her. Maybe Ellie won't be home and she can just hang up?

"You are overthinking this." Sarah's fingers begin dialing the number. "Just rip it off like a bandaid." She pulls the phone up to her ear, but promptly hangs up after the first ring.

"No, no. I can't do this." Sarah throws the phone on the couch and gets up, pacing around the room. "You cannot call your husband's sister for sex advice. That is just…"

The phone rings from its spot on the couch. A momentary shot of panic spreads through Sarah. What if Ellie has call display and could see who was calling? No… there is no way. And it could just be Chuck calling.

She tentatively picks up the phone and turns it over, the smiling faces of Eleanor and Devon Woodcomb staring back at her.

"Oh god, oh god." Sarah mutters. "Like a bandaid…" She hits the answer key and brings it to her ear before she can have a second thought.

"Hello? Sarah?" Ellie's voice sounds slightly panicked on the other end of the line.

"Ellie. Hi." Sarah has no idea what else to say.

"Is everything okay? I got a call from you but it hung up so quickly." Sarah can hear the sound of Clara crying in the background, plus the worry etched all over Ellie's voice.

"No, no. Everything is fine." A sigh of relief is heard over the line. "I just wanted to..." Sarah tries to come up with the proper word, "…chat?"

"Okay." Ellie replies. "Sarah, are you sure nothing is wrong? You've never called just to chat."

"Well…" Sarah says, the lies beginning to flow out easily as the conversation continues, "I just figured that we used to be such good friends and I wanted us to get back there. Or, close to there."

"Sarah," Ellie says, her voice cracking. "That is great! I am so glad you want to talk. Just let me put Clara down for her nap and I'll be right with you, okay?"

"Okay." Sarah replies. She waits as the line goes dead for a few moments, her thoughts swimming. Was that really a lie? Or does she really want to be friends with Ellie again? Sure, she and Chuck have gone on double dates with Morgan and Alex, and Sarah is starting to grow fond of the brunette. But is Sarah there yet in her healing that she can be friends with someone like Ellie? Someone so overbearing and loving and just… the girl version of Chuck? Well, maybe it'll help that she is so far away. No face to face, constantly bumping into each other awkwardness like the beginning of her and Chuck's new relationship. If only she had her memories back!

"Sarah? You still here?"

"Yeah, I am." Sarah replies, her back straightening and her body moving towards the living room couch. This really is the first time she is reaching out to Ellie. Yes, Chuck talks to his sister on a weekly basis, and occasionally Sarah and Ellie say a few words to each other on the phone calls, but she has never actively seeked out advice or friendship. Maybe Sarah Walker really is changing into the Sarah Bartowski these people used to know.

"Good. I'm so sorry about that, it's impossible to have a normal conversation with a toddler climbing all over you."

"It is really no problem," Sarah replies.

"I am so glad you called! I've been meaning to talk to you! Is it weird if I say I miss you? Or just weird for you?" Ellie asks, but she instantly retracts the question. "Oh god, don't answer that! I didn't mean I missed the old you, I mean I miss you in general. I missed any incarnation of Sarah!"

A small laugh is released by Sarah, and she is surprised to find herself relieved at how easily her brain problems come up in conversation and how easily she can ignore it. "Really, Ellie, it's okay. I… I think I missed you too."

"Really? Oh, that is so great to hear!" Ellie says, her voice raw with emotion. "So tell me about your new job! Chuck says you really love it!"

"It's great, and I love my students. It's nice to have a life outside of the spy game, something separate from Chuck." Sarah says. "Not that I don't enjoy having Chuck around – that is not what I mean at all!"

Ellie laughs, "Sarah, calm down. I am not thinking you aren't enjoying your life with my brother. Trust me, if I didn't have my own friends at the hospital and my mommy groups, I would go crazy only talking to Devon. Everything you are feeling is perfectly normal."

"I guess you're right," Sarah says in agreement. "I just keep second guessing myself. I feel the people I talk to think I don't love being with Chuck. Because I do! I am really starting to see the relationship we used to have, and starting to want it too."

"Sarah, that is amazing," Ellie says. "But just remember that it doesn't matter what anyone else says or thinks. I've worked with lots of brain injuries, and everyone comes to terms with their new lives at a different pace. Just, let things happen as you want them to happen. No one can stop you from staying still or moving forward but you."

"That might not be so true," Sarah mutters under her breath.

"What was that?" Ellie asks.

Sarah freezes, her eyes going wide. Ellie was definitely not supposed to hear that. Well, maybe this is good. After all, it is the reason Sarah had called Ellie in the first place. Although, now that they're talking, and Sarah is actually enjoying hearing Ellie's advice, she isn't so sure delving into Chuck's sex life might be such a good idea anymore.

"If you don't want to talk about it, that's fine." Ellie says, breaking Sarah out of her train of thought.

"Ellie, I…" Sarah pauses, unsure how to delve into this topic. What is so hard about it though? She is a spy, able to handle any situation with ease. No, she was a spy. Was. Maybe that means these situations will get harder as she loses practice. "I need to talk to you about Chuck."

Ellie sucks in a breath. "Oh god, is he smothering you again? Let me talk to him. Sometimes my brother just wants to do good, and gets way too overbearing, and-"

"No, Ellie," Sarah says, interrupting the older woman's small rant. "The opposite, really."

"He's… not smothering you enough?" Ellie asks.

"Sort of," Sarah lets out a laugh, realizing just how awkward the next few minutes might be. "He won't… Chuck stops every time we get close to having sex, and it's starting to annoy me a little."

"So, you want to have sex?"

"Yes."

"With my brother?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

Sarah lets out a laugh. "Ellie!"

"Okay, I'm sorry. Just a little teasing from the sister. So, you want to have sex… but?" Ellie asks.

"But…" Sarah tries to think of the proper way to word her dilemma. "Chuck keeps running away at the first signs of being aroused."

The line goes quiet for a minute, then Sarah is greeted by a growing laughter from Ellie. Eventually, the absurdity of the situation causes Sarah to break out into a fit of giggles as well.

"Oh, gosh, okay," Ellie gets out in between laughs. "I kind of figured this was where it was going… but… Sarah… You called me for sex advice about my baby brother." It takes a moment for Ellie to calm herself. "Let's leave out the major details, okay? I may be a doctor but he is still my baby brother and I really don't want to think of the specifics when it comes to him and sex."

"Sounds good," Sarah replies, her laughs finally calming down.

"So… is he having any trouble in that… department?" Ellie asks. "Oh gosh, this is Chuck, and I am talking about if he can get it up. You should really talk to Devon if that's the problem."

Sarah shakes her head, "No, he is doing fine there. It's just... Every time I make advances, he dashes into the other room, or to take a shower, or any excuse really to not be with me."

"Oh, Sarah." Ellie says, sensing the insecurities in Sarah that every girl in a relationship harbors.

"What if… dammit!" Sarah says, the feel of tears welling up in her eyes. When she speaks again, her voice is quieter than Ellie has ever heard. "What if he doesn't want me?"

Ellie can feel her heart break for Sarah, this wonderful woman that her brother is so madly in love with that he doesn't want to push her too far. This woman who spent the last few months learning how to love again, and yet is feeling rejected when Chuck denies her advances.

"Sarah, I talk to my brother at least three times a week, and most of the things he tells me is about how much he loves you, or how proud he is of you, or how he hopes to spend the rest of his life with you. He in no way doesn't want you."

"Then why won't he sleep with me?" Sarah asks, completely abandoning her feign of happiness and letting her tears fall. "If he loves me so much, why does he run when I try to tell him I want more?"

Ellie stops to think for a minute. "Sarah, here is the thing about my brother. The first time he fell in love with you, you had many other men vying for your attention, and Chuck was jealous. He knew of you were a spy, knew what types of missions you went on, and knew you had your pick of every guy in the world."

"I don't get what that has to do with-" Sarah starts, only to be hushed by Ellie as she continues her explanation.

"Chuck is many things, but he is not confident when it comes to you. He still considers himself the luckiest man alive because you fell for him, and still has the scared voice of an awkward and nerdy teenager in the back of his head telling him if he does anything, anything wrong, you will leave him."

"But I won't! I would never leave, even after-"

"I know, Sarah." Ellie says, trying to be as comforting as possible. "We all know, except for Chuck. He still thinks he isn't good enough for you, that he won't live up to your expectations. I'm thnk a part of him believes that, if he isn't as good as you remember, or at least as your body remembers, you will leave him."

"So then what do I do?" Sarah asks, her heart breaking. How could this man, this wonderful man, think she will leave him if he doesn't perform as well as he did in her locked away memories? After the past few weeks, how could he think she would leave him at all? Sarah anxiously waits for a reply from Ellie, who seems to be deep in thought. She wipes the last tear from her face, taking a deep breath to calm herself and trying to fill her heart with as much love as she can muster. Though her brain is still holding back some, it surprises Sarah how deeply she cares for Chuck and how many emotions she can draw out. Though, if this is what love feels like, Sarah doesn't know why she would ever leave.

"Sarah, I really don't know. I'm sorry. The best I can offer is to prove to Chuck that you love him, that you don't care how he was before. Prove to him all that matters is the two of you being together, and how much you love each other."

"But how do I do that?" Sarah wonders out loud, her heart breaking with ache and want for Chuck. If he were there right now, she would crawl up into his arms and never leave, kiss him until they both are starving for air, and even then only come up when absolutely necessary.

"You did it once before, two and a half years ago. I'm sure you can do it again."

Sarah smiles to herself, trying to come up with a plan. Perhaps seduction could still work, but more of an emotional seduction than a sexual one.

"Thank you, Ellie. Really," Sarah says.

"Anytime," Ellie replies with a smile. "Don't ever be scared to call me, okay? Even if it's something as awkward as my brother's sex life, I am always here to help."

"Are you also going to be there just to chat?" Sarah asks, a smile on her face when she hears Ellie laugh on the other end of the line.

"Well that was a given!" Ellie replies. The two women share one last laugh before a crying Clara causes their conversation to end. Sarah safely files away the new information about her husband into her mind, surprised she still has so much to learn about Chuck through his family.

She starts to wander back to the bedroom, slowly wondering which piece would let Chuck know how much she loves him. Maybe she should've asked Ellie that. Finding the drawers still ransacked, Sarah pulls out some of the more appealing lingerie and lays them out on the bed. None of it really compares to the red flamenco outfit she found hidden at the back of the closet, but somehow that particular piece of clothing brings up bad feelings. Maybe it's just Sarah, or many she is remembering something from before the intersect, but somehow the idea of wearing that to seduce Chuck makes Sarah feel like she is manipulating him.

Would Chuck want to see her in something from before, something to remind him of the old Sarah? Or should she get something new, show him the new her? Why on earth is it still so hard to seduce her husband? Maybe it's even harder now that she knows Chuck feels insecure about this as well. If only she had something that says "sexy seduction" and "I'll never leave you" and "I love you" all in one. Even though Sarah hasn't exactly said those three words to Chuck yet.

Maybe that's it though – maybe he doesn't want to sleep with her until he is sure that it won't just be "sex" but will be "making love". Sarah internally groans a little at the word choice – she never loved the idea of "making love" when all she has known is the physical act of sex. Or, at least all her memory knows. Even with Bryce, it was purely physical. Sure, she cared about him, but not in an "I won't take the shot on the off chance that I'll shoot you" way.

Whoa, where did that come from?

Sarah stands up, shaking her head to clear her mind. She needs something new, something different. Something to show Chuck the new Sarah cares about him in the same ways the old Sarah does. She has no idea what she needs to prove to Chuck that he can trust her again, because essentially she is asking him to trust her with his heart, body and soul, but she knows it isn't at the house.

With her new goal in mind, Sarah throws on something presentable, grabs her purse and heads out the door.

Sarah is preoccupied, that is for sure. As soon as she walked out of the lingerie store, perfect bustier and garter piece wrapped safely in its bag, she became completely preoccupied with plans for that evening. The lingerie is perfect – shows enough skin while still being conservative, and has a bit of that innocent side to it that Sarah sees in all her pieces at home. She definitely likes the way it makes her feel, the way she can see herself finally being with Chuck after wearing it. She just hopes Chuck agrees.

She spent the next hour preparing, calling up their favorite restaurant (when did they get a favorite restaurant? Perhaps sometime in between sleeping in the same bed and wanting to sleep together) and arranging for them to deliver a romantic dinner for a half hour before Chuck arrives, finding their candles and placing them around the room, cleaning up the mess on the coffee table and making sure the bedroom is pristine.

A groan leaves her as she safely tucks the lingerie bag underneath the bed and Sarah leaves the house for her two classes of the evening. She should still be home over an hour before Chuck, but now that all the preparations are done and all that is really left is to wait and get dressed once she is home, Sarah's mind begins to wander.

For the first class she teaches, a group of yellow belt pre-teens, Sarah is mostly able to focus on the class. Today's lesson is the first of offensive techniques since the class started, and all of the students are really interested in finding out how to hit and attack. Sarah tries to drill into them that a good offense is always a good defense, and that they should draw on the skills they've learnt the last few months to really get through the class. But she can't help her mind questioning how much defense and how much offense she should be using on her attack that evening.

By the time she has dismissed her pre-teens and is halfway into her adult class, Sarah's mind is nowhere near the class. Luckily they are just practicing sparing exercises, so Sarah can let her body move by memory as she tries to figure out the best way to kiss, the most erotic position to place her hands on Chuck, the best way to venture into the bedroom. But when Jackson, a thirty one year old accountant and the best student in her class, is able to land a punch that Sarah knew how to block, Sarah focuses on clearing her mind for the rest of class.

It works, for the most part. Only two other students managed to get a pass on her, which is either saying she is really off her game, or is an amazing teacher. Regardless, when she is able to dismiss the class at quarter to five, Sarah is out the door to the studio before all of her students.

She races home, trying to talk herself down. "He wants you, Sarah. Not anyone else. You can do this. You've seduced drug lords and undercover agents and assassins. You can seduce your own husband." She repeats the first and last lines of her mantra over and over again, until they barely sound like words anymore and Sarah is pretty sure she can't go through with it. What if she fails? What if Chuck rejects her? What if she seduces him and the sex is terrible? What if she doesn't live up to his expectations? There are way too many variables here, and even though Chuck has said he loves her and clearly wants her if his morning (and afternoon, and night) reactions are any indication, what if the variables just don't add up properly this time.

Entering the house, she looks around at the pristine living room and the candles and the immaculately set table, and finds herself completely alone. As a spy, it was never a bad thing to feel alone. Being alone means no one can hurt you, and no one will ever know your secrets. But right now all Sarah wants to do is grab the phone, call up Chuck and cuddle with him on the couch. Screw sex, she wants Chuck to hold her and tell her it is going to be okay and that he loves her and that these insecurities she never knew existed are all warranted, but completely unnecessary. For once in her life, Sarah Walker doesn't want to be alone.

And then it hits her.

"Dammit." Sarah says, tears slowly filling up her eyes. She walks to the couch, dropping her bag next to her and pulling her knees up to her chest. "How did the nerd do it?"

She leans back, her head over the edge of the couch, and lets out a small laugh. Her head comes back up as the guffaws grow louder, her laughs mixing with the tears on her face and suddenly Sarah can't even tell if she is crying because she is laughing or laughing because she is crying. All because that stupid nerd found a way to weave into her heart.

She must have looked like a mess by the time she answers the door, having spent the ten minutes she was planning on using to shower sitting on the couch completely consumed by her new revelation. The delivery boy, bless him, doesn't say a word and hands over the bag of food with a shocked expression. Sarah hands him way too much money, but insists he keep the change as a tip. She drops the bag of food on the counter, the smell of roasted potatoes and chicken filling up Sarah's nose, but she ignores it and begins walking back to the couch.

She takes a second look at the photos on her way, one of her and Chuck on their wedding day, a photo of them in ridiculous costumes on Halloween, and one taken only a few weeks ago, the two of them laughing with Morgan and Alex on the fountain in the courtyard. And while the first two photos are great, Sarah sees her emotions reflected back through the third. It isn't the product of four years, it isn't the product of being undercover spies.

It is love; pure and simple, from a woman to a man.

The next thing she knows, Sarah has grabbed the one thing she vowed never to watch, for fear of only having memories of the video and never really remembering the event. But does it matter now if she remembers? Or does it just matter how she feels? Who knows if her memories will ever come back? And anyways, they can always make new memories.

As Sarah collapses back on the couch, tears being held back by willpower alone, dinner forgotten on the counter and the lingerie forgotten in her bedroom, she only has one regret about this moment. That Chuck isn't here watching it with her.

When Chuck finally gets home, the streetlights are already lit and the sun has long past set. He rubs his free hand down his face and lets out a long yawn before finally reaching into his pockets to find his keys. Between the computers crashing, a small power outage and Morgan accidentally locking them inside of Castle, the day could not have ended sooner. Nothing appeals more to Chuck right now than collapsing into bed, curling up with Sarah at his side, and sleeping for days.

He opens the door and walks into the living room, too tired to even call for Sarah that he is home. The first thing he notices is the wafting smell of chicken and potatoes, which instantly draws his eyes to the kitchen. A bag sits unopened on the counter, the table is set, there are candles set up everywhere but none of them are lit. Next Chuck notices the music, a familiar tune starting up. His head whips back into the living room, and he can see the widest smile on his own face staring back at him through the television. Half a second later, the camera angle flips and Sarah, his beautiful Sarah, is walking down the aisle towards him.

Chuck smiles himself, but it is drained. He can tell he isn't smiling as wide or as happily as he was during the video. Maybe it's fatigue from the day at work, maybe it's fatigue in never knowing when Sarah will finally let him in. He doesn't know where Sarah is, maybe she accidentally left the video on and went to bed. He stands watching the video, up so far until they begin their vows, when Chuck walks toward the television to turn it off. No use watching it and reliving the memories when there are new ones to make, when every second is a second he can use to convince Sarah to love him again.

But he stops, three steps away from the television, when he hears a female voice speaking along with the one on the screen. "Chuck, you're a gift. You're a gift I never dreamed I could want or need and everyday I will show you that you're a gift that I deserve." The voice is a whisper compared to the one on screen, but the whisper means so much more in this moment than the words said at the altar. "You make me the best person I could ever hope to be. And I want to spend and learn and love the rest of my life with you."

Chuck watches as another drop of liquid rolls down the tear streaked cheeks of his wife, hidden from view before as she is lying on the couch. Her eyes are closed. She doesn't need to watch anymore to be able to say the words; she is repeating them all on her own.

"Sarah," Chuck whispers, sitting down on his knees so he is level with her on the couch. Her eyes shoot open, and it takes a moment for her to focus on his face. Her eyes soften realizing that he is indeed in front of her and not on the screen, yet another tear falls down her face.

"Hey! Hey, whoa, Sarah! Why are you crying?" Chuck says, his voice soft and soothing as a finger runs under Sarah's eyes to wipe the growing tears.

"I'm just… I…" Sarah stammers, trying to stifle her tears and get back to reality. "We said those… before…"

"Said what?" Chuck asks, his hand smoothing out Sarah's hair. He turns to look at the screen, currently showing the happy couple sharing their first kiss. "How many times have you watched that video?"

"I… a lot…" Sarah says. She rearranges herself to a sitting position, a hand nervously moving through her hair. "Chuck… tell me. Did we have a run through? I have this memory of those vows, but with a doily for a veil and twist ties for rings and I just… I need to know if I'm making it up or if it's true. I've watched that video so many times now… I just…"

"Sarah," Chuck says, interrupting his wife from her continued ramblings. "Yes. Yes, we had a run through, in the kitchen, with a doily for a veil and twist ties for rings. Your vows were perfect, mine… needed some work. I can't believe," Chuck breaks off his excitement with a kiss. A mind shattering, earth bending kiss filled with his amazement and love and excitement over Sarah remembering something else.

When they finally pull out for air, Sarah smiles and says four words, and they are still the best four words Chuck has ever heard in his life. "I love you, Chuck."

"Really?" Chuck asks, his uncertainty about Sarah still showing through and suddenly Sarah can see the insecurities Ellie had described in her brother.

"Really," Sarah replies. "I love you, Chuck Bartowski, and I know exactly what to do about it." She reaches down to Chuck, who is still sitting on the floor, and pulls him back into a kiss. This one is tender, loving, filled with emotion. Sarah lets her tongue slowly explore Chuck's mouth, gives him the same opportunity before they finally release each other.

Sarah still has red eyes and tear stains, her hair is a mess from laying on the couch and her lips are slightly puffy and swollen, and yet to Chuck she has never looked better in her life. Because she loves him. It is real again and the nerd can get the girl. Twice.

"Take me to bed, Chuck Bartowski." Sarah says, her voice quiet. "I love you, you're my husband, so take me to bed."

"Yes ma'am," Chuck replies. Any fatigue he may have been feeling before, gone out the window. He scoops Sarah up into his arms, pauses quickly to turn off the DVD then swiftly carries her to the bedroom all the while her lips never stopping their exploration along his neck, cheek, jaw and shoulder.

He places Sarah down carefully, their lips staying molded to one another. Sarah's hands skirt along the bottom of Chuck's button down and slowly she untucks the shirt and undershirt from Chuck's pants. Instantly her hands are underneath, caressing the skin at Chuck's back and she doesn't hold back her moan of pleasure when Chuck's hands find their way to her own bare skin.

Moans of pleasure, articles of clothing and many more "I love yous" are thrown around the room as Chuck and Sarah explore this new yet oh so familiar piece of their relationship. When Chuck lays Sarah down on the bed, the only articles of clothing still adorning her body the boyshorts and sports bra she had on for work and Chuck clad only in boxers, Sarah can't help but let out a small laugh. Of all the pieces of clothing she thought would get Chuck in bed, boyshorts and a sportsbra were down near the bottom with "scuba suit" and "parka".

"What is it?" Chuck asks, his fingers skirting up and down her bare stomach. He leans down and places a kiss on her neck, and slowly begins moving down her body.

"No, no." Sarah replies, trying to keep her mind focused as Chuck's lips find her belly button. "I just… I had a plan."

"A plan?" Chuck asks, his lips stopping their trail down Sarah's body. "A plan to what?"

Sarah shakes her head, holding back any more laughter that is threatening to bubble out. "No, no way. You keep doing what you were doing."

Chuck makes a show of moving his body off of Sarah's and scooting his way back up the bed. He lays down next to her, places a soft kiss on her nose and says, "No way Sarah. You withhold information, I withhold… other things." His face reddens a little, still embarrassed to talk about sex even when they are about to have sex.

"Seriously?" Sarah asks, her body yearning for Chuck's hands and lips back. "I was planning on seducing you."

"Seducing me?"

"Well this morning you didn't seem too keen on getting me into bed, and I figured it was about time." She says, the idea sounding idiotic now that she has said it out loud.

"About time to seduce me for sex?" Chuck asks.

Sarah nods sheepishly, wishing they could finish this awkward discussion and get back to the kissing, when she is interrupted by a loud laugh from her husband.

"So that is what was up with the candles and the take out?" Chuck asks.

"And the food has probably gone bad by now anyways." Sarah replies. When Chuck laughs louder, Sarah rolls over with a pout on her face. "Chuck, it isn't funny. I went to a lot of trouble and it seems I didn't need to do any of it."

Chuck sighs, a hand reaching out to rub Sarah's arm. "Sarah, you never had to seduce me to get me to sleep with you. Just knowing you are ready, that you want it as much as I do, was all I ever needed to hear."

Sarah rolls back over to Chuck. "So then why all the awkwardness every time you got a boner?" She asks bluntly.

Chuck's face reddens, but her replies anyway. "I thought you weren't ready, and I didn't know how you would react, and I thought it was better if I just left… and now I am realizing that is the dumbest thing ever because you're a girl and a spy and obviously you've seen guys in that condition and I'm your husband and wow I really did make a lot of morning awkward didn't I? Why didn't you say something when I-"

Now it is Sarah's turn to shut up Chuck's ramblings with a kiss. "I love you." Sarah says, her heart swelling at the smile on Chuck's face brought on by those three words. "And let's just forget those awkward moments and continue with this one, okay?"

Chuck laughs, but nods as he leans in for another kiss. This time he breaks off down Sarah's neck and sucks on the spot he knows makes her go wild, the spot he hasn't kissed since before the intersect debacle. It gives him the expected result – a lusting and panting Sarah grabbing him back so she can devour his lips.

Sarah stops Chuck as he is going for her sports bra, and she smiles mischievously at him. "You know… there is one other thing I got in preparation for tonight."

"Oh really?" Chuck asks, playing along. "And what might that be?"

"Give me two minutes and I'll show you," Sarah replies, slipping out from underneath her husband and grabbing the bag from under the bed before running off to the bathroom to change. "I'll be five minutes, tops!"

Chuck sees the bag. He sees the Victoria's Secret logo on the side. And he knows exactly what is coming. "You are going to be the death of me!" He yells, a laugh in his voice.

"I love you!" Sarah's voice calls down the halls.

"I love you too." Chuck whispers, his smile a mirror image of Chuck from a year ago, of Chuck waiting at the altar, of Chuck who knows he is going to spend the rest of his life with this wonderful, brilliant, amazing woman.

And I believe you can imagine what happens from here on :)

Thanks for reading guys!

I really don't have that much to say right now - I should never make deadlines again. Self imposed or otherwise. The next chapter will be up when its up (when I write it basically) but I really hope you enjoyed this one! It has been lots of fun getting back into these characters!

Love you lots, please review because they make me happy and make it seem like I should write quicker to please you!

Hugs, BrittJK