Adam felt mostly satisfied with what he had accomplished today. He had driven into town and bought most of the presents he needed to pick up for Christmas. There was still three days go and all he had to figure out was what to get Brian and Daniel. He wanted to get Brian something really nice to try to show him how much he appreciated all of his help the past few months. There wasn't much money to work with, but they had managed to sell about forty Christmas trees in town as well as numerous cords of firewood, so money wasn't as big an issue as Adam had once feared. He and Brian were dead on their feet though. Cutting down and hauling trees was not an easy task. Crane had been able to help some, but with he and Brian both still in school, Adam had done a lion share of the work.
He got the train set for Evan and Ford on credit and figured he could pay that off in January. Daniel still hadn't come up with anything that he wanted, so Adam had asked Crane to think on it for him. As long as he came up with something by Christmas Eve morning, Adam figured he could finish up then, when Brian and Daniel would be off hunting.
The tree had turned out pretty good, considering it was decorated by a bunch of rowdy little boys. Adam knew his mother would have been very proud of the tree. The boys had a good time decorating it, though there were a number of tears shed during the whole process. It was impossible not to be sad. The Christmas tree was something their mother enjoyed decorating and knowing that, plus the fact that every ornament they hung had some special meaning to their mother, the boys couldn't help but be a little sad. In spite of the sadness though, there was a joy in it too. It was further proof that when they all work together, the McFadden boys could accomplish anything. Adam had even coaxed a somber Daniel into helping a little, which Adam considered a small victory, considering how hard the little guy had fought against the whole event.
"Brian, I still have no idea what to get Daniel...or you for that matter." Adam said as he walked into the bedroom he shared with Brian.
"Just wrap me up anything, Adam. I still have to pick out something to wrap up for you too, you know. I don't have any ideas either." Brian laughed. "It's all for show for the little ones anyhow."
"It's probably be easier to just shop for ourselves, I guess. I could use a new pair of work gloves." Adam suggested.
"I guess socks wouldn't be a bad idea for myself," Brian added, turning from his bureau and sticking a finger through a hole in the toe of his sock after he pulled it out of the drawer.
"Guess that just leaves Daniel, then." Adam replied.
"Anything to do with music would be appropriate. That boy is getting good with that guitar. He reads music as good as Crane now." Brian observed.
"Yeah, I think he's gonna have a good singing voice too. Even though I haven't heard him sing anything at all in a few months. Not since...well, you know." Adam stammered.
"Yeah." Brian said sadly. "Hey, what about a harmonica? I taught him how to play mine, he'd probably like one of his own; they're not too expensive."
"That's a good idea Brian. If nothing else comes up, we'll go with that. I'm getting a little excited about the little guys. Ford and Evan are gonna be excited about that train set." Adam said.
"You're starting to sound like a proud pappa, Adam." Brian said.
"I know. I'm starting to see why Christmas was so important to Mom and Dad. Remember how excited they always seemed on Christmas Eve? Guess they couldn't wait to see us open our presents; that's where I am right now.
"Yeah, me too. It feels weird, too. I'm sixteen for Christ's sake!" Brian laughed.
"So, you buy anything for your girlfriend?" Adam said with a grin.
"Which one?" Brian said, punching Adam in the arm.
"Well, I was talking about that fiery little red head you took out last weekend, but...I guess she's not exclusive?" Adam laughed.
"You know me better than that big brother. I play the field. I'm too young to be tied down with just one. But no, I ain't buying any girlfriend presents this year." Brian answered.
"At eighteen, I kind of figured that's the only gift I'd have to worry about this year. But there's no girl in the picture for me." Adam replied glumly.
"Ain't no girl in Carbon County crazy enough to sign on for all of this." Brian said pointing at the picture of the family on Adam's dresser.
"Yeah, and if there were, she'd likely be too crazy for me!" Adam laughed.
"Guess we're gonna be bachelors this year." Brian replied. "I gotta go work on that tractor. I told Dan'l I was gonna let him help me. He's turning out to be pretty good at turning wrenches. When he gets to high school, you need to encourage him to take auto mechanics, he seems like a natural." Brian noted.
"I'll keep that in mind, but he's only nine. We gotta few more years to talk about it, I guess." Adam replied thoughtfully.
"Yes, but you know what Dad always told us. Time goes by pretty fast. These boys will be grown before you know it." Brian retorted.
"I sure hope that's true, Bri. I really hope that's true." Adam said with a sigh.
Brian knew what he meant. They were both happy to have their family together, but it seemed like it would be forever before they would get their lives back...if they ever did.
7BF7B*************************
On the night of the 23rd, after putting the younger boys to bed, Adam and Brian crept up into the attic to pull down the box that contained all of their stockings. The stockings had been knitted by their mother and each one had their names on them. It had occurred to Adam earlier in the day that a long standing tradition started by his mother would sadly come to an end this year. When Adam was still a toddler, their mother had sat down and written a letter on her personal stationary addressed to Adam. She rolled it up like a diploma and slipped a thin satin red ribbon around it and tied it in a bow. She had put the letter in the toe of Adam's stocking and read it aloud to him on Christmas morning. This had started a tradition where each year, she would write something to each of the boys and the letter would be revealed every Christmas morning. Then mom would gather the letters up from each son and place them in separate labeled plastic bags and place them in her trunk. When Adam was twelve, he had asked his mother for his letters and she had given them to him, then helped him make a scrapbook of his letters. In turn, when Brian turned twelve, she had given his letters to him too. He had kept them rolled and tied up with the ribbon in his sock drawer. It suddenly occurred to Adam that this being Crane's twelfth Christmas, he should locate his letters in the old trunk and give them to Crane. He decided he would do that in private, so as not to upset the little boys.
Brian located the box in the attic that contained their stockings and picked it up. When he did, a letter, tied up in a red ribbon, fell out of the box. Brian looked somberly at Adam. They both knew what it was, but was unclear which stocking it had come out of. Unrolling the scroll, Adam teared up when he realized it was a letter written to Evan. Apparently, their mother had written it before her death and had already placed it in the stocking.
"Adam, whose is it?" Brian said, his voice shaking.
"It's Evan's. It's Mom's handwriting." Adam replied, then rolled the letter up and slipped the ribbon back over it. He held it reverently as he knew it was a sacred thing now.
"Brian took it and stuck it down in the toe of Evan's stocking. That's when he realized there were more. He pulled out Crane's, then Guthrie's and felt a letter in the toe of each of those.
"It looks like Mom wrote letters for this Christmas already." Brian whispered. Suddenly, Christmas morning took on a whole new meaning to both young men. They realized that their mother would play a major role in Christmas again this year.
"We should have known she wouldn't let us down." Adam choked out as he tried to swallow the lump in his throat. "I was gonna give Crane his letters Christmas morning." He explained.
"You think they can handle this?" Brian asked.
"I don't know if I can, Bri. But we have to give them their letters. It's too important to hide from them." Adam explained.
"You think we should read them first?" Brian asked, he was afraid the letters would upset them.
"I wouldn't feel right about that, would you? I mean, they were meant to share as a family, but not until Christmas." Adam answered.
"I guess we'll have to trust the man upstairs not to give us more than we can handle." Brian suggested.
"Yeah, I guess we will." Adam said, swallowing hard, then backing his way out of the attic.