hi, gays this is the new chapter .. hope you enjoy

i forgot to put a disclaimer the last time so this is it

disclaimer: i do not own twilight, or any characters .

(Edward)

I was writing in my dairies as I always do in my amazing meadow surrounded by the wild flowers and small bushes , I know that there isn't something interesting in my .. Ahh "almost life" , the pages were boring "of course to me " , but to a humane , it will be like he was reading a horror story with the description I was writing , but today I wanted to try my skill at drawing what I was seeing in front of my eyes , it really was worth drawing .

And also there wasn't anything beautiful in my life that I can keep my attention at.

I tried to take every single detail of the flower's , trees , and a small bird standing on a tree branch .

It was a really breathtaking site .

and I wished there is someone I could share this fantastic view with .

I was deep in my own world that I didn't noticed Alice approaching.

Edward . she said in her mind .

I raised my head up from the journal in my hands to meet with my sister's golden eye's.

" ah, what do you want Alice ? , I believe that I said not to disturb me when ever I was in the meadow ? " I said annoyed by her interruption .

" yeah , yeah whatever !" she said with her bell like voice , rolling her eyes .

I looked in to her thought's to see what bring her up her , but she was blocking me .

I frowned, what was there to block, we never tried to hide anything from each other, unless it was privet.

I waited for her to speak but she just stared at me with a slit hint of worry in her childlike face.

" what, Alice ?, what are you hiding from me ? what's wrong ?" I said irritated by whatever she is hiding from me .

" oh , I just had a vision .. , well not a hole vision , but a few glimpses of you , by the way why does your future became a blur in my vision's ?" she asked in a furious voice narrowing her eyes at me.

I frowned.

"are you planning to leave ?" she continued crossing her eye brows , irritated.

" No , of course not , I didn't even think about it !" I said confused .

we said nothing , staring at each others eye's in wonder, she showed me her visions in her maid , and I frowned.

It wasn't clear, it was a few blurring pictures.

I didn't understand it really, I sow a hand on wait sheet so pale that it almost as pale as ours, and a sweating forehead and the eye brows were frowning witch caused to form tight line's in his/her forehead .

That is surely not mine.

I sighed " Alice what's that supposed to mean ? I don't think that vision includes me !". I know that sweaty forehead is not mine . it's surely for a human , but why is this human is in Alice's vision's ? , what's so special about that human to came in Alice's vision's ?.

" I know , but look .." she showed me anther glance and that was for my face it looked paler then it already is and there was so much pain in it that it made me wince ,

Alice frowned at the site of me in pain, but I lowered my eyes slowly ; trying to figure this out.

After a long silent Alice spoken " well , this is Amm .. uncertain , so don't get all jumpy , it's probably nothing , I just came here to see if you have any intention of leaving so…yeah " her voice was uncertain, she was unconvinced of her own word's! , I didn't answer her , so she turn away to leave but stopped and turn back " aren't you coming ? " she asked me with a calm steady voice .

My head raise " Amm yeah , I'll be right behind you " I said a bit dreamily .

She nodded and left.

I stayed for a few moments thinking about those glimpses Alice had showed me moments ago, and then got up when I sow the down breaking. Well, I guess it's almost time for the hell .. I mean high school to start.

When I arrived home Alice had a strange smile on her face , when I sow what's in her mind I rolled my eye's , she was thinking of the arrival of the new girl Bella swan the daughter of Charlie swan the chief of police , every one in this town was talking about her for week's , waiting for her arrival , ahh people in this town .

I got to my room and played my calming CD " clair de lune " , it always relax me .

When the time is up , I got dressed in a pair of jeans and a brown T- shirt , I always liked the dark colors brown, black , blue, green , but Alice always trying to put me in a .. more "happy" colors as she say, orang , yellow, red she even tried to stuck my closet with pink T- shirt's , ahh that girl will drive me crazy .

When every one finished they got in my Volvo and we speed out to the school.

I parked in my usual spot and cut the engine , got out alone with my siblings and every one got to there own classes , my first class was governess with Mrs. Jonson , as always I paid no attention to what he says , and this routine continued until it was time for lunch , I put all the notebooks in the locker and headed to the lunch room , my siblings were already there at our usual table , I bought my food – to pretend – and sit with them .

The tow couples were by them selves talking , hugging ,and kissing , and I just felt like an outsider , I just didn't fit between the three perfect couples , although I felt disgusted from there thoughts all full of lust to each other , but I felt a little sadness and jealousy that I couldn't have that . I have always convinced my self that I don't need someone to complete me, it's kind of true, I get lonely some time but every one does, right?.

Oh, Edward damn, his so hot ,that T-shirt is so tight I want to rip it of , ohh that muscular chest, hmmm, I wonder what his lips taste like hmm . I flinched from the hideous thoughts of Jessica Stanley , it was disgusting .

" Edward, he's totally gorgeous, but don't waist your time , apparently non of the girls here are good enough for him " ahh those perfect lips , perfect hair , perfect face damn he don't know what's missing him , what's there isn't to like in me , I have big enough boob's and my butt is great , my hair is natural and I have amazing blue eyes … wow so much confides in her self , and that showed how shallow she is . all she cares about is her looks and all those superficial stuff .

I raised my head to see who is she talking to because I didn't see the other person's reaction, or hear it's thoughts , and my eye's met with a pair of the most beautiful deep chocolate brown eye's I ever seen in my existent , they were so deep with secrets , I was so frantic with them that I even forgot to read her mind , so I looked inside of her brine but I was hit with total blackness , I tried again but with no use .

I frown, what the hell ? .

This only took a second to just look into her eye's , the strange girl looked down with a lovely blush into her cheeks , I couldn't help the slit smile that had creep to my face , it was lovely, I noticed that she have a long ,chocolate, brown ,hair covering her heart shape face , she was biting her lower lip nervously and she was apparently embarrassed that I had catch her staring at me .

Isabella swan. Bella, she corrected everyone who called her by that name .

She raised her head up and I sow her face completely, she was pretty in general but, I can see the deep black circles under her eye's , like she hadn't slept in weeks , and her pale skin almost as pale as ours, and so delicate that you can almost see through her fragile skin.

I frowned.

I can sense from here that she was more fragile then the other humans , it maid me so angry , because she could be hurt so easily .

Huh, stupid.

She didn't look healthy seeing the way her body looked, she was so thin .

I had a strange feeling that I waned to protect this fragile human girl , I had to .

It was very strong , I couldn't understand it , perhaps it's the strong for the weak.

I am the one who she need's protection from. I can feel the sadness that came over me suddenly, but I washed it away quickly.

I was dragged from my thoughts by Emmett's mocking laugh .

" looking ill brother , another nasty thought from Jessica Stanley "he said raising his eyebrows laughing.

I frowned.

I was swimming in my "peaceful" thoughts, why in hell he reminded me of that crap now.

I grimed.

That only maid him laugh harder.

What's wrong , Edward?. Jasper said in his mind with a worry tone.

Of course he noticed the change in my emotions.

I decided that I wouldn't tell them about my strange emotions for this human girl.

"I can't read the new girl's mind, I see nothing , all I see is blackness in her mind" I said with a gloomy voice and furrowed my eyebrows.

They all stared at me with there mouth's open in disbelieve , like I was talking a language they don't know.

There expressions were hilarious.

"holy crap, our Edward has lost his power!" he said laughing .

" no, I didn't I sill read your 5 year old brine, Emmett !" I said with a calm mocking voice.

He stopped laughing immediately and stared at me with a blank expression.

"w-wait , are you serious?" jasper asked with the same shocked expression on his face.

I didn't say anything, I just stared at etch one of them with a frown in my face .

I dragged my eye's back to the girl, to try again, when I sow her staring at our direction with a slit sad angelic smile in her face.

I frowned.

Why she is smiling ?

Like she sow something emotional in us !

She blushed a deep shadow of red and turned her head to her friends.

I stared at her face for a long time until Rosalie nudged me

" aren't you coming ?" she said with a irritated tone.

I woke from my thoughts and I sow the cafeteria almost empty , the bell must ring and I didn't notice it.

I grabbed my back pack and speed up to my next class , biology.

I interred the room and take my usual seat by the window.

It was only a few second's until the new girl came in, oh good she is in my class , maybe I could read her mind if she was more closer to me .

But that thought had instantly vanished when her scent strike me like a fair ball in my face.

That scent, that heavenly scent, was so sweet , so delicate, so amazing .

I have never smelt anything like this ever in my existent.

I felt the venom filling my mouth, and the burn in my throat .

I grabbed the side of the table tightly to hold me in my place.

No, I won't let that heavenly delicate scent to ruin the little peace I had in this half –life of mine.

She talked to Mrs. Banner and handed him the slip , took her book out of the counter and headed to her seat , which is next to me.

Crap.

Why did she of all the student's in the class has to came and sit next to me!.

She stumbled her way to my table, dropped her book and took the only available seat in the room, next to me.

She turned her head to me and she was about to say something but when she sow my hostile expression, she closed her mouth and turn her head back blushing.

That is very helping!

I closed my eyes and hold my breath, just waiting for this hour to end quickly.

But, I can hear her heart beating, the blood rushing in her veins, every breath she took.

I open my eyes slowly, and looked at her, she was hiding behind her hair, pretending to listen to the class.

But I know that she wasn't, because every now and then she sneaked a glance at my direction from the corner of her eye.

I looked at her shoulder and sow a big bruise on top of it, I forgot my thirsted for a second.

I frowned.

Has she been hurt?

That possibility has maid me furious, angry.

What happened to her?

I wanted to ask her.

My curiosity had taken the best out of me.

Her dark mind was a huge secret to me, and I would find out that secret, somehow.

I did not realize that I was staring at her for to long until the bell ring.

I wanted to talk to her, but when I moved closer to her side I smelled her sweet scent again, burning my throat.

I run away from her in human speed, trying not to run too fast for a human.

I got in my car quickly, and took a deep breath.

Finally, the air was clean and I could think straight.

Ahh, thank god that I didn't do anything stupid, or else I would've exposed my family and my self, and also I would hurt an innocent child.

It's not her fault that a monster like me exist.

I would leave.

Yeah, that's the best solution for everybody.

The girl will leave after tow years, and I'll came back then.

That thought hurt me badly , caused an aching in my chest.

I convinced my self that I would stay away from her until she leave's.

I got out of the car, and walked to the edge of the forest and run at vampire speed.

I didn't know where to go!

Shell I go to my house and say good bay to Esme ?

No, I can't face my mother, she would want to convince me to stay.

I am sure that Alice would tell them what happened, I just can't stay here, I am afraid that I would run back to her, snap her neck and drained her body.

I stopped in my track when I remembered her scent. so sweet, so mouth-watering , it was almost too precious to drink.

It was mix of lavender, freesia, jasmine, and … some other scents.

Damn it, I should run away from that evil scent.

I run to my father in his hospital to take his car, because I won't be able to go home and take one.

I explain what happened to my father and he told me to do what I can to make this right.

I took his car and speed off to where ever I would go.

(Isabella)

What's wrong with that gay?

What did I do to make him hate me that much?. I thought while I was headed to the parking lot.

Those black eye's were full of pain, rage and, suffering and …something else I couldn't specify.

Was it because of me?

He was happy and laughing at lunch, what made him so furious and hostile all of the sudden?.

I got in my car with tears in my eyes and headed home.

I got home in 5 minute's , I went up stirs and continued unpacking my luggage

While I was unpacking I never forget about Edward Cullen, I felt something when I stared at his golden eye's at the cafeteria earlier, I can't describe it really, I felt… safe ?. I sighed

When I finished unpacking, I headed down stirs to make some lunch, but I didn't find anything in the house to eat.

I sow I jar "FOOD MONEY" it say's, I took a few dollars and went to the market to bay a few things to cook.

I drove to the local market, it was mini market, very small.

When I got out of my truck, I sow his sister's, Alice and Rosalie getting out of a black car it looked like a Mercedes, they sow me standing next to my car, Rosalie narrowed her eye's to me , but Alice gave me a slit smile.

I tried my best to smile back to her but I failed.

I got in the market and grabbed a basket, and started to shop, I had wrote everything I need in a paper, so I wouldn't forgot anything.

I was pecking up a corn can out of the shelf when the alarm in my watch ring.

Damn it!

I took my pills out from my bag and took tow of them, and drink my water right away.

"Hi, there" I heard a bell-like voice behind me, so I turn around and sow the short little pixie smiling gently to me.

I was panicking, I was afraid that she sow the pills , oh my god , if she sow them she would tell everyone.

I just stared at her with wide eyes and nothing came out of my mouth.

" are you … alright?, you look like you've seen a ghost or something!" she had a worry smile on her face .

talk, you idiot !

" Amm … y-yeah I'm totally fine " I stuttered nervously, I turned around to hide my pills in the bag quickly.

" I 'm Alice Cullen, you must be Bella swan " she raised her hand so she can shake mine.

"Amm , yes " I shacked her ice cold hand but I didn't flinch I was used to being cold all the time even in phoenix , it was just the stupid cancer, exhausting me to no end , no matter how many hours I slept I sill wake up tired .

I tried to smile a bit but it turned into a grimace, a sad one.

"so amm… liking forks?" she asked with amused voice.

She must be kidding!

I raised my eyebrow in disbelieve.

She laughed at my expression.

"you must really hate it in here!" she said, still laughing

" you have no idea!" I said with disgusted grimace at my face.

She laughed again.

" Amm … I really should be going now, so Amm … it was nice to meet you Alice! " I said with a finally small smile on my face.

" it's nice to meet you too bella , see you later" she said strolling away from me.

I went to the cashier to pay for my grocery and then I headed straight to my home.

I put my grocery in the kitchen and begin to cook, I kept it simple , a mash potato and steak .

When Charlie arrived, he asked me about my day and I told him it was fain , he thanked me for making dinner and we ate in silent , this is what I love about Charlie , he is just so quite and he doesn't hover.

And also that's why I moved in with him, he won't ask why I puck all the time , or get sick all the time, or go through my stuff like mom ones did.

It will go smoothly, easy, I hope.

I cleaned the dish's and wished a goodnight for Charlie and headed to my room, I took my favorite pajama, my bag , and went to the only bathroom in this floor , I took a long hot shower enjoying the scent of my strawberry shampoo, it was really relaxing and comfortable.

I got out of the shower and brush my teeth and hair carefully, that's when I sow in the mirror my naked bruised body, the bruises were covering most of my body, if anyone sow it he would think that I has been beating all my life or raped or something.

When it's actually it has been caused by this damn cancer.

But, the good thing is, that these bruises disappear for some time, but quickly came back.

I looked in the mirror one last time thinking about the future, what would of happen if I lived a few more years ,what do I want? , I know I didn't want much, I just wanted to be happy before I… die, was that too much to ask?.

I didn't realize that I was crying until the tears dropped on my hand that I was holding tightly to my chest, pressing very tightly so that maybe the pain in my dying heart would disappear.

But it didn't.

I wiped my tears away with a sigh and get dressed, collecting my things and run to my room.

I laid in my bed, thinking of today , and Edward Cullen , the mysterious boy who had apparently hated me immediately, I fell a sleep thinking about his flawless face.

I dreamed of him laughing with his siblings, he was so happy, and I couldn't help the smile that had came to my face , he was so carefree , it was amazing and … so beautiful that I felt my heart pounding in my chest , truly blissful.

so this is it , hope you liked it , if anything is wrong just tell me , thanks for reading ;)

XOXO