Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill or its characters

Thanks for the reviews ya'll(: please keep em up! Also.. Some of you were hating on Karen. Don't! I mean come on it's Karen! I know it seems kind of insensitive to Haley for her to offer Nathan a job but I'm sure she has something up her sleeve… ;)

Chapter 4: Best Not to Think About It

October 12, 2010

Haley stood in the kitchen looking down at the plates in front of her. She was double checking to make sure the order was right before she brought them out there. Well, if she was being honest she was waiting until Nathan was on the other side of the café. She didn't want to be anywhere near him and at the moment he was next to the table that had ordered the food in front of her.

He'd been working at the café for a week and she hadn't spoken a word to him. She planned to keep it that way. She had absolutely nothing to say to him. And it wasn't like he had anything to say to her either. He'd already tried to apologize. But like that night, she didn't want to hear it. Sorry wasn't going to make her dance again.

She watched him walk over to another table and start to clear it off. She took that as her cue to finally bring the food out. Her leg actually wasn't hurting that bad that day and she hoped that she was going to be able to make it all day without her crutches. That had been a goal of hers for awhile. Just one day without her crutches. If she could do that, she could do anything. Well, not anything, but it was a start.

She placed the food down on the table and smiled and apologized for the wait before walking toward the counter to grab the pot of coffee. She heard a crash and turned her head and saw that Nathan had dropped one of the porcelain coffee mugs on the ground and it had shattered. He sighed before placing the large gray tub full of dishes on the table and bending down to start to pick up the bigger pieces.

Haley rolled her eyes before grabbing the dust pan from under the counter. That was the 3rd time he'd broken something since he'd started working here. What was his problem? She walked over to him and dropped the pan on the ground next to him. He looked up at her and then back at the ground before grabbing it. "Thanks," he mumbled. She didn't respond, just nodded before walking back to the counter.

It wasn't that she wanted to help him. God knew he didn't deserve her help. But if he was going to be picking up the broken shards of the glass he was probably going to cut himself. If he did that he was going to bleed all over the floor, and then who would have to clean that up? Oh yeah, she would.

She couldn't wait until Jake got to work. Without him and Karen in the café it was incredibly awkward around the two of them. Neither wanted to speak to other. Not that they would. But at least with Jake or Karen around she had someone else to talk to.

Haley looked up at the clock above the door about every 10 minutes just waiting for her shift to end. When it was over though came her next least favorite thing besides spending time around Nathan. Physical therapy. It served as a constant reminder that everything was different now. That she couldn't dance and she might not ever be able to again. Plus, it always hurt like a bitch.

The bell above the door rang and Haley looked up expectantly hoping that it was Jake. She was disappointed to see that it was only Felix Taggaro. She rolled her eyes. Another one of Nathan's friends. Of course. She watched him walk over to where Nathan was finishing up picking up the broken glass.

"Hey man," Felix said quietly.

Nathan looked at him but didn't say anything before he started to walk towards the counter. He walked behind it and dumped the broken shards into the large trash can under the counter. He was surprised when Haley didn't walk away to a different section of the café when he got closer to her.

Haley couldn't hurry away without it being completely obvious. She wasn't stupid, she knew that he knew she was avoiding him. But short of breaking into a sprint and running away she couldn't get away yet. And too be honest, she was interested in what Felix was here to say to him. From the look on Nathan's face when Felix walked in, Nathan really wasn't happy to see him. Maybe they weren't that great of friends anymore. Who cared if she was being nosy.

"So I get it," Felix said, "you hate me right?"

"Why would I?" Nathan asked.

"Look, me and Rachel… I'm sorry. I didn't plan on it. It just happened."

"Whatever," Nathan said, "I don't care. Really."

Haley busied herself at the register while listening to what they had to say to each other. Maybe that's why Nathan had looked so pissed that night that Rachel came to talk to him. Haley shook her head. She'd tried to warn him about that a long time ago. He didn't want to listen to her. That was his own fault.

"What we did… it was shitty and I'm sorry. But I really like her and we're happy together-"

"That's great," Nathan interrupted. "Now was there a point to you being here?"

"I wanted to apologize."

"Well you did."

Felix hung his head and looked down at his shoes before looking back up at Nathan. "I know you hate me still but there's another reason I came here." Nathan didn't say anything back so Felix continued. "I'm having a party at my house tomorrow night. You should come. Everyone misses you Nathan. You should get your life back to normal."

"I'm not really supposed to do much partying."

"You don't have to drink if you don't want to. You should just come by for awhile. Like I said, we all miss you."

"Yeah well, we'll see."

Felix nodded before looking over at Haley. "You should come too, Hales."

"What?" Haley said looking up at him and trying to act as if she hadn't been listening in on their hushed conversation.

"Party at my house tomorrow night," he said again, "you should come. I'm sure Erik's going. Aren't you guys dating now?"

How was that any of his business? "We'll see," she said in response to his invitation.

"Well I hope to see you both there," Felix said before walking towards the door. As he opened it, Jake reached the other side.

Haley smiled when she saw her friend walk through the door. She untied her apron and tossed it to him over the counter. "I gotta go," she said, "I have physical therapy. I trust you can manage while I'm gone," she said as she walked around the counter.

"I think I can handle it," Jake said.

Haley said goodbye before walking out the door. She didn't give Nathan a look before she left. God, she wished he would just disappear. She should have said no to Karen when she had the chance.

Sitting in the waiting room Haley let her mind wander. All day she'd been thinking about whether or not she should have said no to Karen when she talked to her about Nathan working at the café. She felt like she should have. It would have been less awkward for everyone, wouldn't it have? But now it was too late.

Still thinking about the day when Karen had approached her Haley couldn't stop replaying that moment in her head.

The early Sunday morning rush was always out of control. Haley was hurrying through the café trying to fill peoples orders, their coffee cups, get their orders to Karen and bus the tables. Sometimes, it was hard being one of the only employee at Karen's Café. Especially with her leg hurting like it was. She'd been walking better and better without her crutches and she was really proud of herself, but on the days when she was working as hard as she was, sometimes she wanted to give in and tell Karen she needed a break.

She came behind the counter when she had a break from orders for a little while. She dropped her pen and pad of paper on the counter and her hand went down to her leg. She tried to rub out the pain she was feeling, but it was hardly helping. It was almost making it worse. She couldn't help but wince at the contact from her hand. Ignoring the pain, she tried alleviate the pain. She could feel the jagged scar through the material of her jeans. Just the thought of it was almost worse than the pain.

"You ok Haley?" Karen asked walking towards the counter from the kitchen. She saw Haley bent over rubbing her leg. She told Haley that anytime she needed a break to just let her know and she would understand. But Haley was stubborn, and she would have rather pretended that there was nothing wrong in the first place. Karen understood that. Haley had always been that way, ever since she was little. But sometimes, she could see it on her face that she just needed a break. Even if she refused to ask for one.

"Yeah," Haley replied, "it's nothing."

"You sure?" Karen asked, "why don't you sit down for awhile? I can take care of some of this. Besides Jake should be here soon."

"But he's bringing Jenny today," Haley said, "he's gonna have to keep an eye on her while he's working. I don't want him to take on my work load too. Besides, I'm fine. My leg just hurt for a little bit. It's fine now."

Karen nodded, "ok Haley. If you say so."

Haley nodded and grabbed her pen and paper off the counter and was about to walk from behind the counter when she saw the couple that had just come in and sat by the window. "Before you take care of them," Karen said, "I need to talk to you about something."

Haley pushed her hair behind her ears and rested against the counter, taking weight off her leg. "Ok," she said, "what's up?"

"Well, since you and Jake work so much, I figured it would be good if you guys had some more help. I mean it's great when Lucas can work here, but you know he works with Keith most of the time. And Nathan… well he needs a job. He's trying really hard to get his life back on track. I offered him a job here. But I told him I would have to talk to you about it first."

Haley was silent for a moment, trying to take in what Karen was saying. At just the mention of his name her heart began to race and she began to feel nervous. But when Karen told her that she offered him a job, she was rendered speechless. How could she do that? Obviously, he was her nephew, but she had to know how Haley would feel about that.

"So," Haley began, "I'm confused. Are you saying you want me to quit? Because I honestly don't think I can work here if he'll be here."

"Of course I don't want you to quit. I'm sure you're mad at me for offering him a job here, and I understand that. I just want for both of you to get back to normal. And I don't think avoiding each other is normal. I know that you are mad at him, you have every right to be. But what I think you both need is just time to get things back to normal."

"I," Haley began but was at a loss of words, "I… I just don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything now. You can think about it. And you in no means have to say yes. I will completely understand if you say no. I just want you to think about it for a little while."

Haley didn't want to think about it. She didn't want to think about anything having to do with him. She wanted to say no right now. She wanted to say that there was no way she could be anywhere near Nathan Scott. She didn't want to be around the boy who had ruined her life forever. That was absolutely the last thing she wanted. But she couldn't. she couldn't bring herself to say anything. She knew that she should have told Karen the truth, right then and there, but she couldn't.

Karen smiled at the younger girl before grabbing the coffee pot and walking over to the table that Haley had been planning on waiting on. Haley turned back around and rested her elbows against the table and then rest her head in her hands. She felt like her whole day had just been flipped upside down. And it wasn't even noon. Now all day she was going to be thinking about Nathan. The absolute last person she wanted to think about. "Hey," she heard from the other side of the counter. When she looked up she saw Erik standing on the other side.

She couldn't help the smile that came to her face when she saw him. He had away of making her smile even when she was pissed off. He did that a few nights before when he came into the café after Nathan had left. He'd also don't it the day Nathan came back to school. Erik was sort of amazing in that way. He just had that personality that made him likeable. He was funny and sweet and she really liked him. He had away of changing her mood to that one of a happy one. "Hi," she said with a smile.

"Are you ok?" he asked, "you looked a little upset when I walked in."

"I'm ok," she said, "just… Nathan stuff."

"Oh," he said and frown came over his face, "shoulda known."

Haley shrugged, "Karen offered him a job here. But she's leaving it up to me to decide whether or not he'll actually work here."

"So he's not gonna work here then," Erik said, "I mean, you wouldn't want him to work here."

"I don't," Haley said, "but I just don't know. I can't really make a decision right now."

Erik nodded. He knew that Haley must have been having a hard time trying to decide what she was going to do. If he were her, he would have already said no. There was no way that he would let the guy who ruined his life anywhere near him. But, he wasn't Haley. She was kind and she thought about others before herself. That was something he really loved about her. She was always trying to help others. That's how he'd really gotten to know her. And he was so glad that he had gotten to know her.

"I'm sorry," she said, "I'm always doing this to you."

"It's ok," Erik said with a smile, "I like that you like to talk to me about stuff. Even stuff that pisses you off. I just wish he wasn't always around to constantly remind you of… what happened," he said not knowing if he should say anything more."

"I hate it too," Haley said, "but it's not your problem. I shouldn't always talk about it when we hang out. You must think I'm really boring."

"Absolutely not. You think if I thought you were boring I would have as big of a crush on you as I do?"

Haley smiled and leaned across the counter. "I guess not."

"Speaking of which," Erik said, "when are you gonna let me take you out?"

Haley was broken out of her thoughts by the sound of Aaron's voice calling her name from by the door. Aaron was her doctor. He'd been working with her since she was in the hospital. He had made it his mission to get her to be able to walk without a limp before Christmas. She couldn't wait to tell him that she'd been walking all day without her crutches. She hoped that meant her leg was improving.

Standing up she slowly made her way over to where he was waiting. They walked back into large room with work out equipment where she always had her therapy sessions. Each session had been getting more and more intense and had caused her to use her leg more and more. It hurt like hell but she hoped that it would mean that her leg was getting stronger. All she wanted was for it to be good enough for her to dance again. That was her biggest goal.

She laid down on a table and waited for Aaron to start stretching out her leg. The only thoughts in her head were how she hoped that today would be the day she would find out that she might be able to dance again.

Nathan laid on his bed and tossed a basketball up towards the ceiling. He'd been doing that for about two hours. He couldn't think of anything else to do. Now all he did on the weekends was work, or spend time alone in his room. It kept him out of trouble. If he was out of trouble, Chuck Battle was out of his hair for awhile.

The ball fell back down into his hands and he twisted it in his palms before tossing it back up. Before he had a chance to catch it he heard a knock on his door. He turned his head when it opened and saw Brooke standing in the doorway. "Hey loser," she said and then crossed her arms over her chest.

"What's up?" he asked and looked back at the ceiling before tossing up the ball again.

"Is this what you're planning on doing all night?" Brooke asked.

"That was the plan, yeah."

Brooke scoffed. "Why don't you get your ass out of bed and come to Felix's party?"

"Because that sounds like the exact opposite of fun." Nathan caught the ball in his hands and sat up and looked at his sister who was still standing in the door.

"Because he's dating Rachel now?" she asked. "Come on Nathan. It's not like Rachel's that great of a prize anyway. Besides, Felix is probably saving you from some serious STDs."

Nathan laughed a little and shook his head. "Come on please?" she asked. "Everyone's gonna be there and you haven't really hung out with any of us in forever! You've turned into like a pod person. Please?" she asked again.

Nathan looked over at her saw her pouting at him from the door. "Fine," he said. He stood up and walked over to his closet and grabbed a black sweater and threw it on over his white t-shirt. He then slipped his white Adidas on his feet before walking out the door with Brooke.

They made their way downstairs and out the front door and towards her sky blue bug. He got in the passenger seat and waited for Brooke to start the car. When it did he heard the sounds of the horrible music she listened to blast from the speakers. He turned his head and looked at her with a scowl on her face. Brooke just shrugged before pulling out of the driveway and speeding out of their neighborhood. "Maybe you could drive a little more careful," Nathan said.

"Shut up, Nathan."

As they pulled up in front of Felix's lake house, Nathan could already hear the loud music playing from inside. The sounds of everyone voices and laughter buzzed around him as he got out of the car. As soon as the car was locked Brooke was already hurrying up towards the front door. Nathan walked slower. He didn't really have any reason to hurry into the party. What was he even here for?

He kept walking toward the door and on his way he noticed all the cars that were here already. Most of them he couldn't place with specific people but some he could. Jake's Chevy was parked a ways away from where Brooke had parked. Tim's gray Bronco was parked in the driveway. And of course Rachel's black GMC. Looked like everyone was coming out tonight.

He walked through the front door and was surprised when everyone didn't immediately stop talking and start staring at him. It felt like that's what everyone did at school. Maybe they were finally over the fact that he was back. Whatever the reason for it was, he was grateful. That was definitely the wrong kind of attention.

"Nathan!" he heard from behind him and didn't even have to turn around to see that it was Tim. "You're here! I didn't think you would show up!"

Tim came around to stand in front of him and held out a red plastic cup to Nathan. Without even taking it from his hand Nathan could smell the alcohol in the cup. "I'm not drinking Tim. If you remember that's kinda what got me in trouble before."

"I thought hitting Haley was what got you in trouble."

Nathan sighed and shook his head. "Jesus Tim. Why do you think that even happened?" Nathan could tell by the look on his face that he had no idea what he was talking about and instead of waiting for the light bulb to go off in his head he just shook his head before walking away from him.

He walked into the kitchen and saw Brooke leaning up against Jake and Lucas talking to some of the guys from the team. He looked around for Peyton sure that if Lucas was around then she probably wasn't far off. Since he'd been back he had noticed that the two of them seemed to always be together. They should have stopped acting like they were in middle school and just admitted they had feelings for each other. It seemed simple to him, but maybe he was wrong.

Looking to the left he saw Peyton sitting at the kitchen table on the other side of the counter. She was sitting next to Haley. The instant he saw her he thought maybe he should have turned around and walked back out. He was supposed to be staying away from her. But it seemed like she was always around. It made it pretty hard to stay away from her if she was everywhere he went.

Like she had sensed his presence she looked up from where she currently sat talking with Peyton. His eyes locked with her and he wanted to look away, pretend like he hadn't even noticed her, but he couldn't. He noticed the way her upper lip rose in a look of disgust at the sight of him before she downed whatever was in her plastic cup. He was sure whatever it was, was alcoholic. No way would anything virgin be served at a party Felix was throwing. But he knew that Haley wasn't much of a drinker. What was she even doing here anyway?

He shook his head before turning around and trying to find something that would keep him occupied while he was there. If things were like they used to be he would have been joining in a drinking game or dancing with Rachel. Speaking of Rachel…

"Hey Nate," she said walking up behind him.

He turned around and faced her and sent her a smile. "Rach."

"I'm surprised you showed up. Felix told me that he invited you but I didn't think you'd come."

"Brooke made me," he said nodding toward his sister who stood in the kitchen with her boyfriend.

"I see," she said and then looked back at him. "Well I'm glad you did. It's not really a party without Nathan Scott."

"Don't see what it matters really," Nathan said. "I mean, I'm sure you all managed fine without me."

Rachel reached out and grabbed his arm. "Nothing's the same without you Nathan."

He pulled his arm back and shook his head. "Isn't your boyfriend around here somewhere?"

"I'm sure he is," she replied, "but so what?'

Nathan shook his head. "Stop it Rachel. We're done. You made sure of that a while ago. Nothings gonna change now that I'm back."

"You don't know that," she said, "we could change things if we want." She took a step closer to him and leaned in, "I told you, I miss you Nathan. Maybe things can go back to the way they were."

"No," Nathan said and took a step back from her. He looked away from her and saw Felix walking towards them. He could tell by the stumbling in his step that he was well on his way to getting wasted.

"You came," Felix said and smiled, "I'm glad man. Dude it's not a party without you."

"That's what I hear," Nathan said before looking at Rachel one last time before walking away from them both. He walked towards the sliding glass doors of the patio and when he got there he opened them quickly so he could be outside. He was suddenly hit with a breeze as he stepped onto the wood of the porch. People were talking around him but he didn't care. He needed to get away from everything inside.

He walked over to the porch swing and sat down. He looked at the lake in front of him and watch the reflection of the sky on the water. It seemed peaceful. It was like the universe around him was so oblivious to all the shit that people were causing. He wished that he could be oblivious to everything too.

He sat there for what had to have been an hour. Maybe more. He really wasn't paying attention to the time. He wasn't paying attention to anything until he heard the door open. He turned his head and watched as Haley stumbled out the door. At first he thought it was because of her limp but as he watched her he knew it was because she was drunk. What the hell was going on? Haley James didn't get drunk.

She grabbed the railing in front of her and leaned over it a bit. Nathan thought she was about to throw up. He moved on the bench and she turned around when she heard the sound of him shuffling in his seat. "What are you doing out here?" she asked.

Nathan was surprised by the fact that she was even talking to him. It was just the alcohol though. "What?" Nathan asked.

"Why are you here? Why are you always around?"

"Look Haley-"

"I mean it wasn't enough that you ruined my life," she said pointing at him, "but now I have to see you all the time."

He couldn't pretend like her words didn't sting him. But she was right.

"Haley I'm so sorry. You have no idea how much I wish I could take back that night. But you don't get it. I ruined everything for me too. I would give anything to change that night."

"Well that doesn't change anything," she said, "I still can't dance and you fucked up everything."

Nathan stood up and was about to walk inside when suddenly Haley turned around and leaned over the railing before throwing up over the side. Nathan looked around and was grateful that no one else was around to see that. He knew Haley and he knew that she would be mortified if anyone had seen that. He walked over to where she was standing and gently reached for her hair. He pulled it back behind her shoulders while she continued to puke over the railing.

When she stopped she stood up straight and took a step sideways away from him. "Don't touch me," she said and looked at him.

"Just let me help you," he said.

"You've done enough."

She tried to walk away from him but another wave of nausea hit her and she leaned back over the railing before throwing up more. "You really can't hold your liquor," Nathan said and shook his head. "I'll be right back," he said before walking back through the doors and back into the kitchen. He saw Brooke in the kitchen drinking so he knew that she was not in any shape to be a designated driver. He spotted Peyton standing against the counter and he hurried over to her.

"You been drinking?" he asked.

"What?" she asked, "No, why?"

"I need a ride."

Peyton looked Haley slumped over the side of the deck. She cringed as she heard Haley releasing dry heaves and watched as they shook her small frame. "I didn't know she was drinking that much."

"We just need to get her home," he said.

Nathan walked closer to her and lifted her in his arms like she weight nothing. "Put me down Nathan!" Haley yelled, "don't touch me!"

Nathan ignored her as he walked around to the front and towards Peyton's Comet. Peyton unlocked it and Nathan helped Haley into the back before getting up front. Peyton started the car and began the drive back towards their neighborhood. The drive was mostly silent except for Haley complaining from the back seat.

When they pulled into the neighborhood Nathan got out of the car and went to the back door to Help Haley out of the car. By now she had stopped trying to fight him. "Your mom working late?" he asked her.

"Yep," she replied, "as usual."

Nathan nodded to Peyton to let her know that it was ok for her to leave. "Thanks," he said before he started to walk with Haley towards the door. When they reached the door Nathan bent down and reached for the key under the mat.

"How'd you know it was there?" Haley asked as she slumped against him.

"It's been there as long as I've lived next door to you."

He unlocked the door before helping her inside. He turned on the light and then began to help her upstairs. This house hadn't changed at all. When they finally got up the stairs he picked her up again and walked down the long hall. It was easier than trying to get her to walk the length of the hall. He reached her room and opened the door.

He placed her on her bed and saw that she was already almost asleep. He tucked her hair behind her ear before walking back towards the door. He had to get out of there in case her mom was getting home soon. He was supposed to stay away from her and being in her room was like the opposite of staying away from her. "Nathan," he head her quiet voice say as he reached the door.

"Yeah?" he asked as he turned around.

"This doesn't change anything."

Nathan hung his head down and then looked back up at her before nodding. "I know."