One-shot: Christmas Tree
Rating: K+ (there may be one or two very minor references that you will probably only get if you have a dirty mind…and if you have a dirty mind then im not worried about it being inappropriate)
Disclaimer: No Victorious characters are mine.
Summary: Now that the holiday lights are on the RV, Beck wants to get a Christmas tree for the RV.
Word count: 1586
Continuity: Couple days after Holiday Decorations.
AN: [at end]
"Babeeee…" Beck often whined to wheedle Jade's attention while she's working.
Jade grunted.
"Did you just grunt?"
"No."
"You just grunted."
"No."
"Don't worry. I completely understand."
"There's nothing to understand."
"Except that you grunted."
"No I didn't." Jade was starting to lose her temper.
"Did you just growl?"
"No."
"I like it when you growl and grunt. It reminds me…"
Beck was interrupted by the pillow Jade stuffed in his mouth.
"How am I supposed to get work done if you keep distracting me with your nonsense?"
"It's not nonsense."
Jade just shot him a look.
"I wanted to ask you for help actually."
"Oh god not again."
"Hey! I take offense in that tone."
"Good."
"I haven't even told you what I need help with."
"It's stupid."
"Jade!"
"Last time I helped you, I ended up spending like two hours untangling Christmas lights that you couldn't even hang straight."
"You didn't have to steal our ladder."
"You found another one."
"Andre had to drive over to bring me one."
"You have a friend. Congrats."
Deciding to ignore Jade's sarcasm, Beck tried his luck. "I want to get a Christmas tree."
"What? Why?"
"I like Christmas trees." Apparently that was the best reason Beck could come up with.
"So?"
"I want to get one for the RV."
"Look around." Beck did as he was told.
"I don't see anything special."
"This place is tiny."
"It's not that bad."
"It's tiny."
"It's an RV. How big do you want it to be?" Beck was exasperated.
"And your stuff is everywhere."
"So is yours."
"Exactly."
"What?" Now Beck was confused. Now what argument were they having?
"Where are you going to put a stupid tree?"
Oh. So that was the point Jade was trying to make.
"We can clean?"
"YOU can clean."
"I can clean." Beck nodded.
"Your RV is still really short though."
"We'll just get a short tree."
"I don't like short trees."
"Why not?" Since when did the height of the tree make a difference?
"I don't like Christmas trees."
"Oh."
Beck thought for a while before continuing, "I still want a Christmas tree."
"No."
"Why not? You were okay with the lights."
"I don't have to look at it all day."
"You don't have to look at the Christmas tree all day."
"Your RV is only so big. It's impossible not to."
"What's so bad about seeing a Christmas tree all day?"
"I don't like Christmas trees."
"You already said that."
"It's not my fault you have trouble comprehending."
"I do not."
"Whatever."
Jade went back to work, but Beck sat on his bed, thinking.
"Please?"
"No."
Unfortunately for Jade, Beck was one of the few people that would stubbornly argue with her until he got his way.
"Please?"
"Oh my god. Beck, shut up."
"But I want a tree."
"Why are you such a child?"
"I think you likeeee children."
Jade threw her water bottle at Beck, who ducked.
"Please?"
"Ugh."
Jade was caving, something that often happened when Beck begged. She was happy that Beck was only willing to beg in private; he didn't want to ruin his 'cool guy' attitude. Otherwise, everyone would think that she was soft.
"Can we get a tree?"
"Outside."
"We can get a tree? Let's go." Beck got up and started rummaging through his stuff to find his keys.
"Put it outside."
"Wait. What?" Beck stopped and stared at Jade.
"If we get a tree, we put it outside."
"But but but…"
"It's a compromise."
"What if someone steals our Christmas tree?"
"Why would anyone do that?"
"Because they want a Christmas tree."
"That's stupid."
"Or maybe they hate Christmas."
"If they stole a Christmas tree then they would be stuck with a Christmas tree."
"They might throw it away."
"No one who hates Christmas is that nice."
"Nice?"
"Disposing your Christmas trash for you?"
"Oh. Well I guess we can keep it outside."
"Good." With that Jade went back to reading her script. And Beck kept digging around the RV for his car keys. Jade had driven his car last and she had a tendency to put his car keys where he has difficulty finding them.
"Babe?"
"What do you need now?"
"Where are my car keys?"
"Where you last left them."
"You drove my car last."
"So?"
"Where did you put them?"
"Why do you need them?"
"We're going to go buy a Christmas tree."
"No. You're going to clean first while I edit this script some more."
"Can I read it yet?"
"No." Beck was used to it. Jade would edit the crap out of her scripts before she would be happy enough with it to let someone else read them. And even then, she would only let Beck read them because he bugged her enough. She always said that Beck gave horrible feedback, something Beck took offense to.
"Why do I need to clean? Are you letting me keep the tree inside? Thank you Jade!" Then Beck ran out the RV into his parents' house.
Jade rolled her eyes and went back to her script. Minutes later, he returned with a vacuum cleaner.
"I never said that you could keep the tree…" Jade started but was cut off with the sound of the vacuum cleaner.
"Sorry babe, the vacuum's too loud. I can't hear you." Beck shouted.
"Okay, fine."
"Really?" Beck turned the device off.
"I thought you couldn't hear me."
"No. But I…I…I could read your lips that time?"
Jade started mouthing words at him.
"Let's see. You are saying… 'Beck is so hot. Best boyfriend ever.' Awww gee thanks babe."
That earned him a smack on the head.
"Keep cleaning."
So Jade went back to her script, again, and Beck went to his cleaning.
The RV was quiet for quite some time. And then, "Jade, I'm done." Beck had completely cleared out one corner of the RV. The rest still had stuff all over it.
Jade wasn't particularly picky about neatness though, so she just shrugged and shut down the top of her laptop.
"Wait." Beck remembered something.
"You change your mind already?"
"No. Car keys."
Jade sighed and pulled out the keys from the pocket of her sweatshirt. Beck shot her a look and Jade just smirked back at him.
- (time break) -
"This one?" Beck said pointing at a tree.
"No. Too tall."
"This one?"
"That one's just plain ugly."
"That one?"
"It looks like Andre." Beck shot her a nasty look, which Jade ignored.
"How about that one? That one's short."
"It's like dying."
"This one?"
"No."
"Why?"
"I just don't like it."
"Stop being so judgmental of these trees."
"You're forcing me to spend the next week looking at a tree. The least you could do is pick a decent looking tree. Oh and one that fits in the RV so we don't have to come back to this stupid place." Jade kicked a pebble on the ground.
"Fine. That one?"
"No."
"That one?"
"No."
"That one?"
"Ew."
"That one?"
"Nope."
"That one?"
"Still no."
"This one?"
"Sure."
"Really?"
"No."
"What about…that one?"
"Are you out of your mind? That thing is huge."
"That one?"
"No."
"That one?"
"Beck, you aren't even looking at these trees before pointing."
"Fine. This one?"
"No."
"How about…that one?"
"No."
"This one?"
"Well, it's not horrendous."
Beck was afraid to say anything. In fact he couldn't even tell if he was allowed to breathe. But he eventually had to do something, because Jade was not talking and just staring at the tree.
"So?"
"So what?"
"Can we get it?"
"You're paying for it."
That was apparently the tree to get Jade's approval. Beck gave a smile so wide that Jade couldn't help but smile a little too. Of course, she turned her head to face a tree and hide it.
He waved over an overzealous man in an elf suit about three sizes too small. The sight of the guy made Jade have an even harder time suppressing her laughter.
"Happy holidays guys. Find your perfect tree yet?"
"Ummm. I think we'll go with this one." Beck said, uncomfortably scratching the back of his neck as he pointed at the tree Jade deemed 'not horrendous.'
"Ahhh that tree sure is a beauty, but you sure you don't want something bigger?"
"Bigger won't fit in my RV." Beck was still uncomfortable and Jade wasn't about to help.
"Alright then, you guys super excited to take this fine thing home?"
"Suuuuuper." Jade said with a smirk towards Beck.
"Ummmm we were just finding a tree." Beck said, ignoring Jade's smirk.
"I'll go get some of my fellow elves to help you haul this baby to your car. Hang tight, I'll be back in a jiffy."
With that the large elf walked away, whistling some tune that sounded like it was supposed to be Frosty the Snowman, but he was so off that no one would be surprised if he was going for something else.
"What happened to Mr. Please-Jade-I-just-have-to-have-a-Christmas-tree?" Jade often teased Beck about his tendency to be a huge child and a huge dork when it's just the two of them, then put on his 'cool guy' act whenever someone else was around, even if that someone was a Santa's helper roughly the size of Santa himself.
Beck just pouted, which earned him a smile for Jade. So he pulled her in closer and quickly kissed her on her forehead before the Santa in an elf's suit came back.
AN: Sorry that the general feel/idea of this one-shot was kind of similar to the last one. And that I am way too heavy on dialogue. I'll try to do my best to cut that down next time (unless you guys prefer dialogue?). Let me know your opinion on dialogue :]