Two-shot: Two Elves or a Santa (part 2)
Rating: T
Disclaimer: Actually I wish I could own Victorious as a Christmas gift.
Summary: Beck's neighbor is sick, so Jade needs to figure out how she's going to get the money she needs.
Word count: 1902
Continuity: Right after part1 ended
AN: Second half of the two-shot. You guys didn't seem to like this one as much as the other two. Well unfortunately I kinda liked it so I wrote part 2 anyways. If it counts for anything I feel like this part is a lot better than the first.
"My neighbor said he's sick too, the elves were probably contagious or something. So he's going to find another Santa for the job."
"What?" Jade looked livid. She needed the money and being Santa's elf for a holiday party was what was going to get her that money.
"So I guess we're out of a job." Beck scratched the back of his neck.
Jade started putting clothes back on and murmuring, "What can I do? What can I do? How can I get money?"
"We could do a lemonade stand?" Beck offered. He did like lemonade a little too much for his own good after all.
"You'll just end up drinking it all, like the last time I made lemonade."
"That's probably true," Beck agreed, "We could walk dogs?"
"I'm not good with dogs. I have a tendency to make dogs very hostile."
Beck nodded, remembering the time Jade bought him a dog, and that dog was hostile enough to attack his dad. So walking dogs was probably a bad idea.
Speaking of hostile and attacks, Beck thought of the time Jade roped him into taking care of Trina.
"Tori would probably pay you to keep Trina far away from their house for a day." Beck joked.
Jade just glared at him.
Beck sighed and said, "Babysitting?"
Jade gave a disgusted look but stopped moving. "Wait." Jade looked at Beck.
"What?"
"That's it!"
"Babysitting?"
"No stupid. Call your neighbor."
"What?"
"Just do it."
"He's sick."
"I know."
"Then why do you want me to call him?" Beck was confused.
"Tell him not to find another Santa."
"But the kids are looking forwards to meeting Santa."
"And they will."
"What?"
"I want to be Santa Claus."
"Whoa WHAT?"
"Tell your neighbor that I'll be Santa."
"Where did this come from?"
"Well he needs someone to be Santa Claus. I need the money soon. Being Santa probably pays even better than being an elf. And you won't have to watch your girlfriend walk around dressed like a Christmas prostitute."
"A Christmas prostitute?"
"Yeah I think banging an elf counts as hiring a Christmas prostitute."
"Why would an elf…prostitute…what?" Sometimes Jade's logic was hard to follow.
"Well Santa probably doesn't pay that well, and the people with a Christmas fetish is like an industry hardly touched upon, so it probably pays okay."
Beck shook his head, "we are not having this conversation right now."
"Right. So will you ask him?"
"Can you even sound like Santa?"
"Of course I can." Jade said using one of her favorite man voices. (AN: think the Bade Drive by Acting Challenge)
"That's too creepy sounding."
"Ho ho ho. I'm Santa Claus." Jade made her man voice sound more jolly.
"Still a little feminine."
"How about this?" Jade lowered her voice a little more.
"Good. But can you keep that up for a whole night?"
"I don't think I can stay this low, but I can be pretty close. I guess you'll just have to do as much of the talking as possible." Jade continued with her newfound Santa voice.
"I guess. But you aren't fat enough."
"Layers."
"You'll get overheated."
"Feed me lots of water." Jade went back to her normal voice.
"How are you going to get your face to look like Santa's?"
"Well I'll get an especially large beard and that will cover half of my face. And ask Cat for help with makeup on the other half."
"Cat will be so excited."
"Ughhhh. Remind me to tell Cat not to tell anyone about this. Oh and you don't tell anyone about this either." Jade glared at him.
"Got it. But Cat can't really keep a secret."
"Yeah she can."
"Remember when Tori told her not to tell anyone about the party bus?"
"Cat just chooses which secrets need to be kept and whose secrets should be kept."
"Really?"
"Well you haven't found out about the…" Jade started before dramatically putting her hand over her mouth.
"Jade." Beck warned.
Jade smiled, and said "the nothing."
"Jade you need to stop doing this."
"Nawww. Watching the cool and collected Beck Oliver freak is fun."
"You are so cruel. I'm worried now."
"Remember that you should always be worried though."
"Well I guess I'll call him," said a defeated Beck.
Jade kissed him on the cheek. And with that, Beck's I guess turned in to a definitely. After a couple years of dating and kissing, Jade still had that effect on him. So he dialed his phone.
Meanwhile, Jade went to another corner of the RV and called Cat. The two conversations couldn't be more different. Beck was politely trying to quell his neighbor's doubts about letting a teenage girl play the part of Santa Claus. On the other hand, Jade was shooting out sarcastic remarks, rolling her eyes, and trying to calm down an excited Cat, oh and making her promise not to tell anyone.
Both conversations were successful. The legitimate fake Santa hesitantly agreed, mostly because he couldn't find anyone else and it was better to have a teen girl Santa than no Santa, especially since she was an actress. He just hoped she was a good one. The bubbly redhead immediately agreed to do Jade's makeup. Her excitement could be heard through the phone. She had a harder time promising to keep it a secret though. But she did, and Cat always kept Jade's secrets. Jade was her best friend and big sister, sometimes even mother, after all, even though Cat was technically older than Jade.
Cat arrived at the RV while Beck was getting his neighbor's Santa outfit.
By the time Beck got back, Jade was already halfway done.
"You certainly are turning into an old man." Beck said, admiring Cat's work.
"Not just an old man, Santa Claus." Cat giggled.
"Santa Claus." Beck nodded.
"This is the best present Jadey could ever give me. I've always wanted to create Santa." Cat clapped happily, causing Jade to yell at her for knocking some dust on her.
"I don't think it's a present," Beck tried to reason with Cat.
"Of course it is. Anything that makes you happy is a present." With that, Cat went back to work.
Jade got completely transformed into Santa Claus in the next hour.
Cat smiled at Santa, well Jade. Then she wrapped her arms around her belly. It was a merge of two of her favorite people: Jade and Santa Claus. Both were magical to her.
The trio walked out the RV: Santa Claus, an elf, and Cat.
"Hey you going to be okay?" Beck called to Cat who was waiting for her brother to pick her up.
"Yeah. Bye Santa!" Beck could see Jade's smile forming behind the mass of beard.
And the couple drove to the house.
They sat in car a block away for a while, waiting for the phone call telling them to enter. Normally, they would be making out, but it was a little awkward, Santa making out with an elf. So they just talked, and talked, and talked.
At 8:27 pm, the call came. Beck drove the car to house. And they walked in.
At the sight of Santa, the kids screamed and all ran to Jade. Little hands were everywhere and little people were trying to jump on her.
Jade did a decent job sitting with all the kids, reading them a Christmas story. Meanwhile, Beck fed her a lot of water and got the sack from the owner of the house. The sack was filled with presents, bought by the parents for Santa to pass out for the kid.
Calling out the names, Santa handed the kid their present and took a picture. The kids were in awe how the present was exactly what they wanted.
After that, Jade played a couple games with the kids. It ended up being more like Beck played the games while Jade sat and watched because all the layers made it a little hard to move.
An hour and a half later, Santa was finally leaving. Waving goodbye at the kids and saying one last "Ho ho ho and Merry Christmas," Jade walked out the door with Beck and the owner of the house following her.
"Can I ask you a question?" The owner asked as they stopped in front of Beck's car.
"Sure."
"I don't mean to be offensive, but are you by any chance female?"
Jade and Beck started laughing hysterically. But the owner looked confused.
"So…ummmm…are you?"
"Last time I checked I was." Jade replied in her normal voice.
"YES!" The owner jumped up, which was a pretty funny view, a grown man in a thick jacket bouncing like a child.
Beck and Jade exchanged confused looks. Seeing their exchange, the man explained. "we made bets."
"And you bet that I was a girl?"
"Yeah. Is there any way that you could prove it?"
"I could rip off my beard and go back in." Jade offered.
"NO!" The man even held out his hand in a stop sign. "You'll ruin Christmas for the kids."
"Right."
"Can I get a picture of you?"
"Aren't you afraid of the kids seeing it?" Beck questioned.
"I didn't think of that," then turning to Jade, he asked, "Are you wearing nail polish?"
"Well yeah."
"Can I take a picture of your hand holding your glove?"
"I guess."
After that was done, the owner put his phone away and pulled out his checkbook.
"So who do I address this check to?"
"Jade West" the girl said, smiling.
"And for yours?" he said turning to Beck.
"We get paid separately? I thought I get paid from her?"
"Well that's how it usually goes, but you guys are probably unfamiliar with the rules and wages."
"There are rules for being Santa?" Jade looked slightly appalled.
"See? I don't want her to steal your money boy." The owner teased Beck, "she does seem pretty feisty."
Jade glared.
The owner stopped laughing and asked Beck, "so who do I address your check to?"
"Jade West." Beck answered.
The owner looked a little surprised but wrote it down. And the couple smiled at each other.
After getting their checks they got in the car, Beck helped Jade squeeze into the passenger seat before easily sliding into the driver's seat. He turned the engine on and the heater and radio started. Last Christmas, Jade's favorite holiday song (but don't tell anyone that she likes it), was just finishing up.
"You were amazing." Beck told his girlfriend, handing her his check. She was the best Santa Claus he met.
"I'm about to kiss Santa Claus." Beck told his Santa. He leaned in, trying to kiss her, but getting a mouth full of fake white beard. It made the couple laugh. Just then, I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus started playing, making the two of them laugh even harder.
Once they got over their laughing fit, Jade pulled off her beard, wincing in the process, before leaning in to kiss Beck. Beck smiled in the kiss because there was no one that made him as happy as Jade did.
After the time Jade spent sweating and dehydrating under the layers of clothes, forcing her voice into an unnatural Santa voice for hours, and dealing with grubby hands of children all over her, Beck Oliver had better love his Christmas present.
What she didn't realize was that she was the best present he ever received.
AN: Thank you for the suggestions. I feel weird using other people's ideas…like I'm stealing or something.
AN2: Unedited XD so excuse any errors in spelling, grammar, or logic please.