I no longer love him, that's certain, but maybe I love him.
Love is so short, forgetting is so long.
It was a cold christmas eve, many people rushing to and fro with armfuls of late shopping. Nobody spared a second glance to anyone around them, the crowds poured over each other with complete disregard for personal space.
As one man walked down the sidewalk hands plunged deep in his pockets, another came from the opposite direction hands full of parcels. One man scowled at the passers by, enjoying their christmas, happiness that he felt entitled to. The other smiled at the brightness of the city, grinning inwardly at the thought of opening the gifts he was laden with.
Kevin and Connor had collided before and on that brisk winter's morning they would again.
"Sorry!"
"Oh God are you ok?"
"I didn't see you."
"My fault."
"Are you alright?"
"Connor?"
"Kevin?"
The packages on the floor were suddenly forgotten, the man before each of them now more important.
"Christmas shopping?" Kevin tried his expression unreadable.
"No." Connor replied quickly, flinging his scarf back over his shoulder he considered leaving. They were blocking the path, disgruntled shoppers skirting round them.
"I'm just heading back to my apartment," He said quickly as Kevin looked a bit lost at his answer.
"I've got quite a journey left," Kevin smiled uncertainly, "You live close?"
"Same place."
"Haven't moved?"
"Nope."
"It's been a long time."
"Five years and three months."
"Wow," Kevin raised his eyebrows, "That is specific."
"What about you?"
"I moved."
"Oh."
"In with someone else."
"Good."
"Mhm."
Connor stared at the ground his fingers picking at the threads in his pockets. Neither of them had anything to say.
"I'll see you around." Connor muttered before picking up a stray parcel that had dropped out of Kevin's sight. He handed it wordlessly to him and walked straight past Kevin not wanting him to see his face. He knew Kevin would be able to read it. Read the pain, the regret, he needed to get out of there before his emotions took hold of his senses.
Kevin watched the retreating figure, holding his breath until he vanished into the crowds. He could run after him, there was still time, he'd catch up. But instead, Kevin continued to walk in the opposite direction. The taught strand between them had snapped.