A/N: You know Harry Potter's amazing when the theatre starts bawling SIMULTANEOUSLY like a chorus of banshees (namely during the Great Hall morgue scene with Lupin, Tonks and Fred).

Disclaimer: I don't own either series.

Chapter 5: Visitor

Matsuda paced around his hotel room as he addressed the stuffed toy sitting in the loveseat.

"You must guard it with your life, Mufasa. No LOOKING at strangers, no FRATERNIZING with strangers, and absolutely no ACCEPTING BRIBES from strangers. Yeah, I know you were the one that told Mogi that I write My Little Pony lemons in my spare time, don't even deny it!"

Matsuda paused and glared at the lion plushie before flying into a full-blown caps lock rage.

"NO, SCREW YOU. OFFICER TARO BUBBLE TEA WAS AND IS A VERY CLEVER SCREEN NAME SO THERE'S NO WAY MOGI FIGURED IT OUT HIMSELF, YOU TRAITOROUS ARSEHOLE. AND FYI, SCAR IS TEN TIMES COOLER THAN YOU! YEAH, I WENT THERE."

Mufasa stared wistfully up at him. Mufasa didn't like caps lock.

Matsuda sighed, and his voice lowered to an apologetic whisper. "I'm sorry Mufasa-kun, I overreacted. It's just that nobody else can know about this. Aizawa thinks it's just a toy. But I know better. I know the truth..."

The detective's gaze dropped to the deadly weapon lying at the stuffed lion's feet.

Touta Matsuda was, in fact, a diehard conspiracy theory enthusiast. Oh, yes! Wizardry was right up there with the aliens, the moon landing, and presidential assassinations. Matsuda also knew firsthand of the many strings governments pulled. Why, the Task Force was doing it themselves, by keeping L and Watari's deaths under wraps, and by covering up the existence of the Shinigami and the notebooks.

So, the greasy-haired whack-job that had ambushed them in London after sighting the flying had obviously been sent by one of those secret government sectors, one that was controlled by wizards and possibly trolls. Therefore, the thing that Aizawa had confiscated from him was most certainly the real deal.

A real wand.

Well... it was his wand, now. And he would do anything to protect it.

"My preciousssss," Matsuda croaked Gollumishly before skittering out the door like Spiderman™ (Marvel lawyers don't sue me pls for I used teh trademark symbol lolz).

Snape closed his eyes and focused on The Three Ds. It was a long shot, but it was better than lurking around the Hollywood sign doing nothing.

Destination: On top of the Shinigami. Because Snape should never bottom. It's visually awkward, like picturing a hamster humping a walrus.

Determination: Not to end up Splinched into a hundred bite-sized pieces, like mini Oreos. Oreos, being some obscure symbol/metaphor/onomatopoeia/delicious snack for how Severus Snape is bitter, hard and Dark on the outside, but sweet and soft and good on the insi – oops, spoiler alert, SPOILER ALERT.

Deliberation: This was Snape's specialty. Who else would take ten whole seconds to say, "Turn to page 394"? A snail blessed with the power of speech, that's who.

BANG.

The Shinigami named Ryuk yelped when Snape suddenly materialized on its back, grasping its shoulders.

The smaller Shinigami screamed, "Ryuk, there's a human on you!"

Ryuk turned his head one-eighty degrees and scowled. "Yeah, I kinda noticed. How is he able to see us, Sidoh?"

"How am I supposed to know?"

"Because you're the one carrying around a bunch of scrolls with Shinigami rules written on them!"

The Shinigami named Sidoh shook his head. "No I'm not. That only happened in the manga," he explained patiently.

"Ugh, how useless... So hey, who are you? And how'd you get up here?"

Snape clung onto dear life as Ryuk purposely passed through a cloud. He had never been skilled at flying (in fact, he hated broomsticks, he hated everything that had to do with Quidditch), but riding a Shinigami was about ten times worse.

"I'm no ordinary human. I... I'm a wizard," Snape forced out, "and I need your help."

"A wizard? What's that?" asked Sidoh.

"A person who can perform magic," Snape replied.

Ryuk's eyes gleamed. "Magic? Oooh, how interestingly interesting, you interesting human! Can you show us some interesting tricks?"

"No. My wand got stolen by a pair of Muggles," Snape said curtly. "They go by the names of Aizawa and Touta Matsuda. Do you know where I can find them?"

Ryuk almost fell out of the sky.

"Why, yes, as a matter of fact, I do..."

Light was in the middle of grilling Matsuda and Aizawa for more details about Wammy's House when Ryuk unexpectedly appeared in front of him.

Ryuk, invisible to the others, waved casually at Light, who gave no indication that he could see the Shinigami.

"You've got a visitor," he singsonged. "He's waiting outside this very moment."

Light frowned.

"Did you hear that?" he asked Matsuda.

"Eh?"

"I think someone's at the door," said Light. "Were you guys followed or something earlier?"

"Um, no..." Matsuda stammered nervously. "Maybe it's room service?"

"I specifically cancelled room service. Go see who it is," ordered Light.

"O-Okay..."

Both Aizawa and Matsuda got up to check on the entrance of their hotel suite. Aizawa peered through the peep-hole and was surprised to see a young, red-haired woman standing there. She was quite beautiful, save for the fact that her face was wearing an expression akin to intense constipation.

Aizawa couldn't shake the feeling he'd seen that expression before. Very recently, actually...

"It's a woman," Matsuda said in awe.

Light was startled. "What? Are you sure?"

"She looks," Matsuda momentarily broke off, blushing, "ah, she looks like she needs to use the bathroom or something. Should I let her in?"

"Hmm," Light muttered.

Ryuk had used the pronoun he, but Matsuda seemed adamant that their visitor was female.

Almost instinctively, Light glanced at Ryuk. The Shinigami grinned mysteriously back at him.

Curiouser and curiouser.

"Go ahead. What harm can it possibly do?" Light murmured, narrowing his eyes as Matsuda hurriedly unlocked the door.

A/N: I have a habit of over-thinking things, hence another slow update. I'm very sorry! *blows kiss*

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