A/N: Thank you to all my reviewers! I really appreciate it, and I'm glad you all like it so far. :)

Disclaimer: I still don't own Ouran High School Host Club….

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CHAPTER 3: WITHOUT YOU

Before he had even opened his eyes, Kaoru heard the low murmur of voices and the dull beeping of a heart monitor --

Wait, a heart monitor?

Kaoru's eyes flew open and he groaned: everything was white.

His head hurt. No, scratch that – his entire body hurt.

"He's awake! Kao-chan's awake!" Hunny's unmistakable voice filled Kaoru's ears. It hurt. Every little noise made his head throb. The white, brightly lit room didn't help. Neither did all the voices of the other Host Club members. It also didn't help that his arm felt weird…it felt heavy and awkward.

Even through his pain, Kaoru realized that he could only be in one place: a hospital; but why? He couldn't remember anything that had happened after he had…

Oh God.

Hikaru. Where was Hikaru?

Kaoru winced and lost his train of thought momentarily as Tamaki yelled at everyone to keep quiet; then he heard Haruhi's voice telling everyone to get out. Surprisingly – or perhaps not so surprisingly – they listened. He sighed, glad that the room was finally quiet. Now he could think. Hikaru, what --

"Kaoru?" His thoughts were interrupted again by Haruhi. Haruhi. The last time he had seen her, he'd said that he hated her. That much he remembered. Of course, he had been lying. He had been jealous. Kaoru had let his emotions get the better of him; and although he wanted desperately to apologize , he couldn't stop himself from asking:

"Where's Hikaru?"

Kaoru could see Haruhi was uncomfortable with him asking this question. He frowned. "What? What's wrong? Where's Hikaru?" He demanded a little louder than he had to. That hurt too. Damn, why did everything have to hurt?

"Kaoru…Kaoru, I'm so sorry…." Haruhi's voice broke and Kaoru realized she had started crying. He couldn't speak. Hikaru. She came over to the side of his bed and took his hand. This was obviously meant as a comforting gesture, but it didn't help at all to settle the panic now coursing through Kaoru's entire body.

"Kaoru…when you ran…he followed…." She paused, taking a deep breath. "And…and…." Pause. Deep breath. "A car…it came out of no where…." Pause. Deep breath. "It almost hit you, but…." Pause. Deep breath. "He pushed you out of the way and – and…." She stopped and shook her head, unable to continue. Kaoru stared at her in horror. Hikaru.

"HIKARU!" He yelled, before he could stop himself. He could barely breathe now; his body entirely filled with terror, panic, fear and many other emotions he wasn't quite sure of at the moment. Kaoru frantically tried to get out of the hospital bed, but a sharp pain stung his arm and he cried out in surprise, pain and frustration.

"Kaoru! Be careful," Haruhi cried out, her face streaked with tears. "You broke your arm…when he pushed you. You hit your head pretty hard too. The doctors think you might have a concussion." But Kaoru wasn't listening to Haruhi. He wanted Hikaru. He needed Hikaru.

"Damnit, Haruhi! Where's Hikaru?" He yelled at her. Haruhi was lying…that had to be it. Either that or he was dreaming. This wasn't real. Hikaru couldn't be…

"No!" Kaoru yelled, tears forming in his eyes now. "Hikaru!"

"Kaoru, stop it! Kaoru!" Kaoru was trying again, unsuccessfully, to climb out of bed; but Haruhi held him down.

"Then tell me where the hell Hikaru is!"

"H-he's…." Her voice was trembling. "…in a coma. The doctors don't know if…he'll be alright." The room was suddenly silent, as Kaoru stopped struggling.

Hikaru. No, no – not Hikaru. Not Hikaru – his Hikaru. His beautiful, perfect Hikaru.

No. He wouldn't believe it.

"No, no. You're lying. You're just trying to get back at me…both of you…."

"No, Kaoru! No..." Haruhi shook her head helplessly. Kaoru knew he was being stupid and irrational (he was acting that way a lot lately) but he couldn't help it. He couldn't believe that Hikaru could be in a coma…. This was all Kaoru's fault. If it hadn't been for his own selfish desires, this might have never happened. If only Kaoru hadn't let his emotions take control of him. If only Hikaru hadn't been an idiot and pushed him out of the way…. How dare he? How dare Hikaru do this to his brother! Kaoru deserved to be the one lying in a coma right now, not Hikaru. This was Kaoru's fault, and now Hikaru might die.

No.

Kaoru forced himself to stop thinking like that. He looked up at Haruhi and he was again overcome with the desire to apologize, but instead asked:

"Where is…every one else?"

Haruhi wiped away her tears before responding. "I sent them out when you woke up. Hunny and Mori…are in the cafeteria. Hunny wanted cake…." She smiled slightly.

"Kyoya's talking to the doctor's. It's his hospital. Rich bastards..." She muttered. Kaoru could tell she was trying to cheer him up. Kaoru appreciated it, but her attempt was futile. "And Tamaki…he's talking to your parents. He's letting them know you're awake."

Kaoru frowned slightly. He didn't really want to talk to anyone right now, least of all his parents. The only person he wanted to talk to was Hikaru. Haruhi was watching him carefully.

"I'm sorry --"

She was cut off by the sound of Hunny's shrill voice (It still hurt).

"Kao-chan, Kao-chan! I brought you some cake!" Hunny held out a piece of cake. Kaoru forced a smile and shook his head. Hunny pouted, disappointed that Kaoru didn't want any cake. His face lit up again as he held out his beloved stuffed bunny, "Then you can hold my bun-bun!" Kaoru shook his head again, starting to get annoyed. Mori walked over silently and picked up Hunny before he could make things any worse.

Haruhi sighed, as Tamaki waltzed in and began (quite loudly and unnecessarily) acting obnoxious, as usual.

"I think Kaoru's tired. We should probably let him sleep." He heard Haruhi's voice over the ruckus and gave her a grateful smile.

He was tired. So much had happened…in such a short time…. He needed to think. Kaoru turned away from the door, as everyone left. He sighed contentedly at the silence that hung over the room (besides the steady beeping of the heart monitor).

Then his happiness suddenly turned into despair. He was alone. He had never been separated from Hikaru for more than a few hours. Knowing that Hikaru was lying helpless and unconscious and alone in a hospital made Kaoru feel sick, especially since he blamed himself for all of this.

Hikaru.

I'm sorry.

The last things he had said to Hikaru…were unforgivable. He wanted nothing more in this world than to be in his brother's arms right now. He wanted to apologize…to Hikaru, to Haruhi…. How could he have said all those things? What had come over him? It was so unlike him to lose control over his emotions.

Oh Hikaru. I'm sorry. Please…please….

The tears flowed, and he couldn't stop them. He buried his face in his pillow, and he cried. He cried like he hadn't cried since he was a little boy. Only this time, Hikaru wasn't there to stop his tears.

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When Kaoru finally opened his eyes again, he could sense that he wasn't alone. He looked around and to his great relief the room had been dimmed, though his head still hurt.

"Haruhi?" He questioned drowsily, staring at the small figure in the uncomfortable-looking blue chair placed to the left of his bed.

"Hnn?" She had been asleep. Kaoru smiled. "Kaoru? You're awake?"

"What are you doing here? Were you here this whole time…?"

Haruhi shrugged. "I just didn't want you to wake up to an empty room. I thought maybe you'd…want someone to talk to…."

"Oh," Kaoru replied, a little shocked. She still wanted to talk to him after what he had said and done? "Uhh, thanks." There was silence between the two of them for a few moments, before Haruhi asked timidly:

"So, did you want to talk about anything…?"

"Uh…no. Not really, no."

"Oh." She sounded disappointed. Kaoru looked away. "Actually…" He paused, embarrassed. He hated apologizing. Of course, he didn't make as big of a deal of it as Hikaru. He still hated it. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Haruhi." He looked at her. "I didn't mean what I said. I was just…"

"Jealous?" She finished rather bluntly for him and he looked away, embarrassed again. "Kaoru…it's fine, really. I understand. You missed Hikaru." She sighed, stood up and came over to the side of the bed. She placed her hand on his arm; he looked up at her, surprised by how understanding she was being. "Look, if you really hated me, would you really have put up with me for so long?" She smiled at him and he returned the smile; this time he didn't have to force it, this was a genuine smile.

They both jumped at the sound of her cell phone. "Oh! Ah, hold on…." Haruhi dug in her pocket and pulled out her phone. She sighed, clearly annoyed. "It's Tamaki." She explained, rolling her eyes before answering.

Kaoru didn't pay attention to what she was saying; he was busy thinking of what she had said. How could she be so understanding? But then again…she was right. If he really did hate her, he wouldn't have put up with her for so long. Kaoru sighed.

"What an idiot…" Haruhi frowned, hanging up the phone. She sounded irritated. "Sorry…but I have to go. Tamaki's having us fitted for some idiotic costumes."

Kaoru frowned unhappily. So the Host Club was going to continue even though two of their members were gone….

Haruhi laughed at the expression of Kaoru's face, and he gave her a questioning look. "Don't worry, we're not continuing the Club without you guys. You don't actually think Kyoya or Tamaki…or any of us for that matter…would let that happen?"

Kaoru shrugged, "Then what's with these costumes?"

"Well, if I told you then it wouldn't be a surprise, would it?"

"Huh? No one said anything about a surprise…" Haruhi just shook her head and smiled.

"I need to go now. You know how Tamaki gets when someone's late."

Haruhi left before Kaoru could say anything else. Kaoru frowned in confusion, closing his eyes. As much as he wanted to know what this 'surprise' was, he was tired.

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When Kaoru woke up again, he was alone.

Alone.

He hated being alone. He was so used to having Hikaru right by his side and now…he was alone.

Hikaru…

"I miss you." His voice sounded strange in the empty room, and he was gripped by an intense, sudden sadness.

He needed to see Hikaru. He couldn't stand being away from his brother anymore…

Kaoru grunted in discomfort and pain as he pushed himself up into a sitting position in the bed. He winced as he swung his legs over the side of the bed, careful of his injured arm. He stood up, his legs stiff and sore. How long had he been in that bed anyway? Kaoru frowned and began to walk awkwardly.

Hikaru.

All that mattered now was seeing Hikaru.

He was halfway across the room when he realized he had no idea what room Hikaru was in. Kaoru paused, then continued on. It didn't matter. He would find Hikaru.

"Hikaru…"

Kaoru continued onward, out into the hall. Ah, it was bright. He had thought his room was bright. But this…was simply unbearable. He grimaced. His head was throbbing so much he could barely think, but he continued down the hallway. Walking wasn't so hard now, but he stayed close to the wall anyway.

"Mr. Hitachiin!" Behind him, he heard a nurse begin to come after him but he ignored her. "Mr. Hitachiin! What do you think you're doing?"

All that mattered was Hikaru.

Hikaru.

Kaoru began walking faster, hearing the woman behind him catching up.

"Mr. Hitachiin!"

"Go away!" Kaoru yelled, now nearly running. He was out of breath and his head felt like it was going to split in two, but he kept going. He turned a corner, then another and another until he was sure he had lost the nurse.

He leaned against a nearby wall for support, breathing hard. His body ached, but the need to find Hikaru was only stronger.

A voice from the door to his right floated down the hallway, and he couldn't help but listen.

"…are you sure this is him? Are you it's the one who hit Hikaru Hitachiin?" There was a pause in the man's voice and Kaoru crept closer to the room to listen better.

Hikaru.

Another voice and another man. This man sounded older, rougher. "Positive. It was a hit and run, but there were a handful of witnesses. This man, Yuu Tadao, is the only one who fits their descriptions. No one got the license plate number, but he has the same type of car all the witnesses described."

Kaoru backed away from wall in horror as the other man continued, "I feel so bad for --" But now Kaoru was running and he was too far away to hear anymore of their conversation.

Hit and run.

Witnesses.

Hikaru.

Kaoru was running blindly. He had no idea where he was or where he was going.

Hikaru.

Hikaru.

Hikaru.

It was all his fault. He had to find

Hikaru.

Hikaru.

Hikaru.

Doors flew open as he past, but none of the patients was Hikaru.

"HIKARU!" He cried desperately, flinging open one last door to find

Hikaru.

Hikaru.

"Hikaru…" He breathed, walking slowly towards his brother. It was Hikaru.

Hikaru looked so helpless, and Kaoru hated it. This wasn't Hikaru. This wasn't his Hikaru. He wanted Hikaru. Kaoru knew he was being selfish…but he wanted his twin!

Kaoru began to cry silently, taking his brother's hand and caressing his face, his hair…. Hikaru's face was bruised and scratched and his left leg was bandaged, broken. Kaoru also noted he was wearing a neck brace.

"Hikaru…you idiot. Why did you do this? It should have been me…it should have been…."

Kaoru broke down, sobbing. He wished with every fiber of his being that Hikaru could be there, holding him, comforting him.

But he wasn't.

He was lying here in a coma.

Hikaru.

Suddenly, Kaoru was gripped by an unnatural, violent rage. Kaoru wanted nothing more than to meet this bastard, this person who had done this to his brother, and hurt him.

Kaoru would make Yuu Tadao pay for what he had done.

Kaoru would kill him.

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A/N: Well, I hope everyone liked this chapter. Next chapter will be up soon. Please review?