A/N: Sorry for the long-ish wait for an update. I've been pretty busy lately.

Disclaimer: I don't own Ouran. The end.

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CHAPTER 6: WITHOUT YOU

"Hikaru's awake."

Haruhi's voice ran through Kaoru's head like a whistle, loud and piercing.

Hikaru was awake.

Before anyone had a chance to say anything else, Kaoru was gone. He was running through the hallways again, everything all too familiar. Except –

"Damn, I don't know the room number…." Shit. Kaoru slowed to a walking pace and looked around him. He had no idea where he was, or even what floor he was on. He noticed that most of the room numbers he passed were in the five hundreds. It was only a coincidence that he had found Hikaru earlier, and he cursed himself for not even so much as looking at the door number.

Kaoru glanced around, thinking.

Did he really want to see Hikaru right now?

To be honest, no.

Well, of course, he wanted to see Hikaru; but he wanted to think about…some things, like what he would say; and he really didn't want to be found by anyone.

Kaoru's wandering eyes finally found a door without a room number. Upon closer inspection, he saw that it was a bathroom. It was the perfect place he could hide. It wouldn't seem extremely suspicious if anyone found him there either.

He walked over to the bathroom and luckily, the hallway was completely deserted, so he slipped inside unnoticed.

Once inside, he simply stared at his reflection. It was so weird. He looked so much like Hikaru, but on closer inspection, there were so many ways they looked nothing alike. He wondered how people got them confused so often.

Kaoru sighed, and shook his head.

How could he possibly apologize to Hikaru?

And how could he ever live like this…without ever telling Hikaru his true feelings: that he loved him as more than a brother, more than he should.

Hikaru would reject him, hate him.

And Kaoru would die – he would just fall apart – if Hikaru ever hated him.

Although, Kaoru thought bitterly to himself, he probably already does.

Why couldn't Hikaru have a better twin? One who didn't have all these sinful feelings? One who was stronger and smarter and wasn't selfish… Hikaru deserved a better twin...why didn't anyone realize that? Kaoru just wasn't good enough.

All that really mattered was if Hikaru was happy, right?

As long as Hikaru was happy, Kaoru would be happy…but Kaoru didn't deserve to be happy. After all, Kaoru had sent his brother to the hospital in a coma –

"Oh God, it is too late." He spoke to his reflection, and he could see the look of disgust on his face in the mirror. Hikaru already hated him; he was sure of it. How could he not hate him knowing what he'd done?

Kaoru couldn't face it. He couldn't.

Kaoru frowned at his reflection and struck out his good arm at the mirror. It shattered, and Kaoru hissed in pain as blood poured from his hand into the sink and onto the floor. Carefully, he bent down and picked up one of the shards. This…this was what he deserved. To be in pain, to suffer for all he had done.

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Hikaru groaned. There was activity and noise all around him, and he could barely think.

Where am I? What's going on?

"Kaoru!" The image of his twin came to mind almost immediately.

"Hold still!" A voice from above told him, and he felt someone try to hold him down. Hikaru blinked, and a man in a white coat came into focus. A doctor. That meant he was in the hospital, or some kind of demented scientist was conducting an experiment on him. He seriously doubted the latter.

And that's when the memories came flooding back. Kaoru, running into the street. The car coming straight towards him. Hikaru pushing him out of the way. The screech of the tires. A sharp pain. And then…nothing.

"Kaoru!" He screamed again, this time louder as he struggled to get out of the man's grasp. "Kaoru!" Was Kaoru alright? Where was he? Why wasn't he here?

"Sir, please calm down."

"Where's Kaoru?"

"I don't know…but please, you need to calm down." The doctor frowned down at the Hitachiin and whispered something to one of the two nurses behind him. She nodded and came forward, holding Hikaru's left arm down. She grinned down at him. It was so incredibly creepy. The other nurse came into view then, holding a large needle. Hikaru struggled harder.

"NO! Kaoru!!" The nurse plunged the needle into his arm. It didn't hurt, though he screamed. He continued to struggle, but everything was getting blurry…it was harder to see, it was harder to move. "Kaoru…" He whispered, and he saw the nurses still grinning at him. Hikaru shuddered, as he closed his eyes once again and fell into a deep sleep.

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Kaoru grimaced, but not completely from the pain. He grimaced at his own sick, twisted mind and he smiled. The pain…he actually enjoyed it. He laughed. A bitter, warped laugh.

What was wrong with him? Why was he enjoying this? He knew it was wrong…

He wondered what Hikaru would say if he knew.

Kaoru shook his head and looked around. It was a mess. Glass littered the floor, stained with his blood.

He took some paper towels from the dispenser, wet them, and began to clean up the blood from his arm when it had finally stopped flowing. He figured it wasn't worth his time to clean up the rest. What good were janitors if they didn't have a job anyway?

Kaoru tried as best as he could to cover up the scratches on his arm with his hospital gown, though it didn't help all that much. Ah, well. It would have to do. He left the bathroom slowly, making sure the corridor was still deserted. It was.

Now, he had to find the others. Or Hikaru's room. Whichever came first. He still didn't really want to face Hikaru, but he knew he had to. Kaoru couldn't avoid him forever.

"Kaoru?"

Kaoru spun around, to find -

"Haruhi."

"What are you doing down here, Kaoru?"

"Just looking for…"

"Hikaru?" Haruhi finished for him as he hesitated. Kaoru nodded, making sure to keep his right arm covered. "Well, come on. You're on the wrong floor. After the whole incident earlier, Kyouya said they moved him to the third floor so you wouldn't be able to find him. But it is Kyouya's hospital…so of course, you'll be able to see him."

"Oh."

Haruhi frowned slightly. "Are you okay?" Kaoru nodded, smiling cheerfully…a little too cheerfully.

Haruhi frowned a little more, but didn't say anything. She began to lead Kaoru towards the elevator by his arm, and he didn't have time to pull away before she noticed. She gasped, as she saw the deep gash in his arm.

"Kaoru…! What…happened to your arm?"

"Oh…I, um…I fell earlier."

Haruhi paused in thought for a moment. "But I didn't see any blood -"

"I fell." He repeated firmly. Haruhi gave him a worried expression, but decided to drop it…for now. She led him over to the elevator and when one was available, they got in. They were alone. Haruhi pressed the button for the third floor, and glanced at Kaoru.

"Kaoru are you sure…?"

"I'm fine." Kaoru gave her another false smile, his arm hidden again.

"Kaoru…that cut wasn't there before." Haruhi's eyes bore into Kaoru's until he looked away. "You know I'm your friend. You can tell me anything."

"I know." Kaoru refused to look at Haruhi again, and then whispered, "Please don't tell Hikaru about…any of this."

"Kaoru…"

"Please." Haruhi didn't reply, and both rode the rest of the way in silence.

When they got off, Haruhi turned right and they continued to the end of the hallway. Kyouya was outside of room 1545, talking with a doctor, and writing in his notebook as usual.

"Kaoru…there you are. No use going in now…Hikaru's sleeping. When he woke up, he got frantic and the doctor was forced to give him medication to sedate him."

Kaoru frowned. "Well, make them wake him up again!" He knew he was being irrational and childish, but despite everything, he really missed his brother. "This is your hospital isn't it?"

"Kaoru…" Haruhi put a hand on his shoulder, but he pulled away.

"Please calm down, Kaoru." He jotted something into the notebook, and then glanced at Kaoru. "I can't just demand these doctors to wake up a patient because a visitor wants to see them. The doctors here have enough patients to worry about…"

Kaoru glared at Kyouya. "Feel free to go in though. Your mother is already in there." Kaoru was gone long before Kyouya had finished. He entered the room, and smiled briefly at the sleeping form that was his twin. It was then that he noticed the figure hovering over Hikaru's bed, crying silently.

"Mom?" The woman turned around, startled.

"Kaoru!" She ran over to her son and hugged him fiercely. She pulled away and looked at him with worry and confusion all over her face. "You scared me earlier. Why…did you do that?"

"I'm sorry Mom," Kaoru gave her another of his fake smiles, but it worked. "I guess I was just…scared. I acted really…stupid. We've never really been separated before." Kaoru nodded over towards Hikaru, who was sleeping peacefully. "Kyouya-senpai said Hikaru was awake, but…"

"When he woke up and you weren't there…" Ms. Hitachiin shook her head and Kaoru nodded. She wiped away the tears on her face, and then gave her younger son a reassuring smile. "I guess I'll leave you two alone then. The doctor said he should wake up soon…"

Kaoru nodded, gave her a hug and watched as she left. "Hikaru…" This scenario seemed all-too-familiar. As much as he didn't want to confront Hikaru about that or anything that had happened, he still wanted to hear his voice, feel his touch…

"Kaoru…" Hikaru's voice was barely a whisper and it sounded…different, but there was no mistaking it was Hikaru. Hikaru's eyes fluttered open, and found Kaoru's. They stared at each other for what seemed like hours.

"Hikaru…" Tears formed in both twin's eyes as they embraced gently.

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A/N: I hope everyone liked that. It's definitely not my favorite chapter though and it was short. I apologize.

It took me forever to write though, I've been so busy lately. I'll try to update sooner. Reviews would be greatly appreciated, as always. :)