A/N: First, I AM SO SORRY it has taken so long to update. I've been EXTREMELY busy these past few weeks with projects, essays, tons of work, plus personal problems…blah. Plus the fact that I haven't really been motivated. XD

THANK YOU so much to all the readers and reviewers who have read this far, I really do appreciate it. I would have wanted to give up a long time ago if it hadn't been for you! Thank you!! Now, on with the story….

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Chapter 7: Without You

Days passed. The minutes and hours blended into one other, until Hikaru wasn't sure how long he had been sitting in that damn hospital bed, unable to move. Nurses and doctors entered the room periodically to check his vitals; all the while, that incessant beeping noise haunted his dreams. It felt like an eternity that this endless cycle continued; but eventually, Hikaru was pronounced well enough to be let out of the hospital.

His neck still wasn't completely healed and his leg was still sore; so, just to be safe, his parents hired a nurse to look after him for a while. She was old and wrinkly, with white hair and a scrunched up face. She reminded Hikaru of one of those dogs…a pug. Whenever she talked, Hikaru could barely understand her gibberish, so usually he just smiled and nodded and she would normally go away after a bit.

His parents had stuck him a dark, cramped room in their mansion that Hikaru hadn't even known existed. It had obviously never been used. There were cobwebs in every space imaginable; and a layer of dust covered everything about an inch thick.

But even that wasn't the worst of it.

His parents came to visit him at around five o' clock each evening, though Hikaru didn't bother to ask anyone how long he'd been locked up in this damn room. Sometimes Haruhi, Tamaki, Hunny, Mori or even Kyouya came to visit him; though that was scarce.

But that wasn't the worst of it.

None of those people really, truly mattered. The one person that meant more to him than life itself, Kaoru, never – not once – came to visit him after he had first awoken.

The worst thing of all…was being without Kaoru for so long. Where his twin was, he could only guess. He understood that Kaoru had school, but was he actually going to the Host Club without him? And even if he was, he couldn't even find the time to come visit his twin? Not once. If it had been the other way around, Hikaru would be by Kaoru's side constantly.

As Hikaru lay in his bed all day, memories from that night floated through his head constantly, and he couldn't get rid of them.

"It's you – it's always been you."

"I hate her."

"Now…now, you bring her here. To our room. To…to…"

"Hikaru…no, you idiot. I love you. And that's why I'm leaving."

Hikaru didn't understand what had made Kaoru snap. Kaoru had said he was leaving because he loved Hikaru. That made no sense. Then, right before the car came, Kaoru had said: "Hikaru, I hate --" and got cut off. He was about to say he hated Hikaru. Why? Did he actually mean it?

What had he done to make Kaoru hate him? Kaoru was his baby brother…he would never consciously hurt Kaoru.

Hikaru was alone.

He had never been alone before in his life.

…Kaoru had left him alone.

How could he…?

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Kaoru stared out of the open window, the breeze blowing his hair gently and cooling his face.

It had been two whole weeks since he had been to see Hikaru.

Did he feel guilty?

There wasn't a minute that passed by that Kaoru didn't feel guilty; he longed for his brother with every fiber of his being. He had never been away from Hikaru this long, and it hurt him so much. But Kaoru just couldn't – couldn't – face Hikaru. He felt the separation was good for them.

Of course, Kaoru had visited Hikaru when he first woke up, but then – after that, he just couldn't bring himself to go see him again.

He just felt so guilty. It consumed him, and he knew he should apologize. But he just didn't know how.

It was funny. Hikaru was his brother, his twin, his best friend. They confided in each other and cherished each other more than anyone else in the world.

So, why couldn't he do this, when it mattered so much?

Was their bond breaking?

Was it now so weak that Kaoru feared it would shatter if he did face this?

He laughed – a cold, heartless laugh.

"Kaoru?" He turned around. Haruhi. Shit, he'd forgotten. He was sitting in the corner of the Third Music Room; and he'd been so lost in his thoughts that he didn't realize the others were still there.

She came over and sat next to him. "Are you alright?"

"Uh, yeah. I'm fine. Just…a little tired."

"Maybe you should go home. You really shouldn't be here without Hikaru -"

"I'm fine!" Kaoru replied more forcefully, paused and sighed, then replied more calmly, "I'm fine. Really. I have to do this."

"Are you sure?" Kaoru nodded and stood up. Today was the first day Kaoru had felt brave enough to face the Host Club…alone. Previously, he'd just had his driver pick him up immediately after school. The other members never even had a chance to ask him about it…though, even if they had the chance, he doubted they would ask him to come without his brother.

"WEEEEEEEEEEELCOME…to the HOST CLUUUUUB!" Tamaki's voice boomed a few feet away from them. Kaoru and Haruhi looked up in shock, but quickly recovered as their customers entered.

Soon, Kaoru was surrounded by a group of annoying, giggling girls.

"Kaoru-chan, you're here alone today?"

"Where's Hika-chan? Is he alright?"

"Is your arm okay, Kaoru-chan?"

He was bombarded with idiotic questions, and it was so unbearable that he nearly lost it. What was with all of these questions about Hikaru? Of course, he should have expected it. But still…how the hell was he supposed to know how Hikaru was? It's not like he'd seen him in oh, almost three weeks!

Damn. He was a coward. What was he supposed to tell these people? That he was a heartless bastard and that he didn't even go to visit his twin. Was he supposed to confess to them that he was too much of a damn coward?

Kaoru groaned. He had a headache.

"What wrong Kaoru-kun?"

"Nothing, I um just don't feel good so…I'm just going to go."

Before anyone could answer, Kaoru made his way through the crowd of customers, leaving without looking back. When he got outside of the Third Music Room, he leaned his body against the door and sighed. He frowned, whipped out his phone, and called his driver to pick him up in the front of the school. Kaoru slowly walked outside. It was a nice day, but the heat from the sun combined with the day simply made his head hurt even worse.

He climbed into the limo when it stopped in front of him and rode in silence as he had grown accustomed to in the last few weeks. He missed Hikaru next to him so much…. If Hikaru were here, they would be laughing… If Hikaru were here, he would be happy… If Hikaru were there, it would be so much easier…

When they finally arrived, Kaoru scrambled from the car and ran straight for his room, without any delay.

What exactly had Kaoru been doing every day after school to pass the time?

How had Kaoru been handling all of this?

Drinking. Yes, drinking. His parents didn't know about it. Nor did any of the maids or butlers who worked for them. Or at least he didn't think so. Even if they found out, he didn't care. As long as Hikaru never knew.

He kept a stash of drinks hidden under the bed just for such occasions. Whenever he wanted to forget…he slid under his bed (he was really skinny after all), took a drink from the carton…and he drank his troubles and sorrows away. He drank and drank until all of the painful memories of Hikaru went away.

This day was no different. Careful of his still-broken arm (though it was healing quickly), he crouched onto the floor, crawled under the bed, and took a bottle from the carton hidden away under his bed. He untwisted the cap, threw it back under the bed and took a sip of the alcohol. Perfect.

The only thing that was different this time was that he couldn't forget. Or, at least it was taking a hell of a lot longer than usual. He took another long drink, but still…Hikaru's face and voice found its way into his head and just wouldn't go away!

"Stop it, Kaoru!"

"Look me in the eye and tell me nothing's wrong."

"Kaoru…you punched me…"

"Do you really hate me…that much, Kaoru?"

"Go away…" He muttered weakly, fighting the tears. He lifted the bottle to his lips and drank desperately now. Please, please…let me forget….

When he was finally so drunk that he could barely stand and had to sit down on the bed, he couldn't take it anymore. Hikaru just wouldn't go away!

"GO AWAY!" Kaoru screamed and threw the now-empty bottle against the wall, where it smashed into many sharp, small splinters of glass. The shattering sound it made reverberated inside his head and caused an enormous headache. "Ow…" Kaoru groaned and rubbed his head fiercely. When that only made it worse, he stood up (or at least, tried to) and took a few steps. "Aspirin…" He muttered weakly. He needed something for this damn headache; but his feet were so wobbly and his head was so cloudy that he just couldn't walk or think clearly. He tripped over his own feet, and fell heavily to the floor.

He thought of Hikaru. What would he think if he saw Kaoru like this?

He would be disappointed, that was for sure

That's all Kaoru was to anyone; a disappointment. The tears formed in Kaoru's eyes and they splashed to the floor. "Hikaru…" He crawled over to the pieces of glass on the floor from the bottle and began picking them up, tears spilling from his eyes. When he had gathered them all up, he put them in a little pile on the floor…he would get them later…. He was too tired now and could barely sit up. He didn't even have the energy to cry anymore, and he laid his head down on the floor. Not the most comfortable position, but it would work for now. Before he knew it, however, he felt a wave of nausea come over him and he lifted his head to the side and vomited. He groaned in pain and disgust; then, suddenly, his head fell back to the ground, unconscious.

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A/N: Hmm, well I hope everyone enjoyed that. Please please please review. You'll make my day. :)

Next chapter will be up sooner, I promise!!!!!!!!!