Leverage

by A. X. Zanier

A joint mission leads to the discovery of another secret project at The Centre.

9. Chapter 9

Mountain High Resort

Near Eureka, Montana

Jarod lowered the binoculars and rubbed his eyes, wishing he had been there... not to help so much as to see the show up close and personal. He hadn't wanted to leave, but he most certainly hadn't wanted to be captured by either Miss Parker or Mr. Lyle, but also hadn't wanted to leave Alyx and her partners alone to face The Centre.

He needn't have worried.

Alyx had dealt with the situation handily.

Sadly, she had probably made Mr. Raines want her even more.

Jarod could still feel her in the back of his head, so knew that the amount of power she had used was immense, and yet still only a drop in an ocean of that available to her. After yesterday he had expected her to feel at least some pain, even though the majority of her efforts had not involved allowing numerous minds into her own, yet she had been completely fine afterwards. The energy expense minimal at best.

He likened it to Master Yoda after raising the X-wing from the swamp on Dagobah. Right down to the release of a single held in breath at the end.

She'd made it look so easy, and it both should and should not have been.

He suspected that he had changed her, suspected that she had changed him, but what ultimately would come from the changes he had no idea.

A van pulled up before the cabin and he lifted the binoculars to see what was going on now. Alyx walked out of the cabin, suitcase bumping along the ground behind her, laptop bag slung over one shoulder, the three dogs fanned out around her. Her partners lagging several steps to the rear, both without their travel gear, suggesting that wherever she was going she was going there alone. Well, alone as she could be with three Rottweillers at her side.

The driver opened the side door of the van, and she waved the dogs in, while he took her suitcase and carried it around back. Hobbes gave her a quick hug then left her and Fawkes alone. They stood apart for several long minutes, Darien's head tipped down and staring at some spot between his shuffling feet, until Alyx broke the stalemate, walking forward and reaching up to set her knuckles of her left hand against his cheek. They held that tableau for a few moments then whatever war Darien had been fighting within produced a winner and he leaned down to kiss her. When they parted, neither looked very happy, clearly there remained unfinished business between them, but it was also clear that Alyx did not have the time to deal with it. A last look and she turned away, the driver shutting the door behind her, before moving to the driver's seat. Darien remained in place until the van had disappeared from sight. Only then did he turn and go back into the cabin.

Jarod lowered the binoculars; there was nothing left to do here. Alyx was safe, Lyle had been stopped, Sydney and company would be heading back to The Centre empty-handed except for the red notebook, which meant Jarod felt free to leave. He stood, brushing off the snow, and headed back to the jeep. He climbed in, tossing the binoculars on the passenger seat and started the engine.

He had no plans for his next stop; nothing in particular had caught his interest. Shifting, he pulled the note out of his pocket and read it over again. Maybe... maybe it was time to head back east for a while.

Decision made, he tucked the note away and put the car into gear.

…..

Private Residence

Newport, Rhode Island

…

A couple of smartasses, through the medium of Southpark, gave us this piece of wisdom, "Family isn't about whose blood you have. It's about who you care about."

They couldn't be more right no matter how twisted the branches of the family tree get.

The roots… they still go deep.

…

"So, Rose decided to name them Huey, Dewey, and Louie."

Alyx snorted into her cup of herbal tea, just managing to get it out of the line of fire before spilling it. "I take it that means they are adjusting well."

"Which they are you referring to, the dogs or the kids?" Mike questioned, not about to make things easy for her.

Not that any of this had been easy. Telling him the truth about their... conception had been one of the most difficult things she had ever done. Staying away from her children still remained at the top of the list, but destroying any illusions about her family was definitely up there in the top ten. He had taken the news as well as expected, which was to say with disbelief followed by realization that it was the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, as she put all the pieces into place and showed him the proof she had. He had arranged blood tests to verify it, but she was certain what they would reveal: that she and Mikey bore no direction genetic relationship with their parents or siblings. Hell, possibly each other. Mike was obviously not Jarod's clone, as he looked nothing like him.

Gods, what a fucking mess. "Both?" She knew the kids had questioned the mysterious benefactor that had given them the dogs, but Mike had kept mum. Not easy with a couple of semi-active telepaths in the house. "I know I've asked this before, but do we tell Jacob and Patrick?"

Mike rubbed his forehead. "Yes, but not now. We need more info, useful info, before we go to them. If even half of what you've told me is true, this Centre is beyond dangerous and we cannot drag them into this, not without preparation."

"Yeah, I know," she agreed sounding as dour as she probably looked.

"What?"

"Just... they've barely adjusted to me being alive and the whole Jess/black-ops agency thing, this... this is going to want to make them run for the hills."

Mike snorted. "You ain't kidding. Jake is still foaming at the mouth, but since he can't contact you directly, I'm the one who gets yelled at regularly."

"And there you have made my point," Alyx said in dismay. "How the hell did this happen to our family?" She really wanted to understand. It seemed their family had been a target... forever, maybe even long before their parents had even become a couple. Far fetched, maybe, but as viable a hypothesis as it being nothing more than ill luck.

" 'Chele..." he trailed off and shook his head. "It's not that cut and dried and you know it. Yeah, some of it had been planned, some... not so much, but we still get to decide what we do with our lives."

Alyx sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. "I know that. I believe that, but sometimes that whole fate/destiny thing seems to be the more logical explanation for what is going on in my life." And she was tired of it, tired of not being in control of any facet of her existence, of being pulled in a dozen directions at once, none of which the one she wanted to move in. She wanted her life back, if only she had any clue what her life was.

Mike reached out to set a warm hand over her cold one, the weather the typical mid-fall cold, damp and drizzly, which, while warmer than Montana, still left her chilled. "We've worn this topic out, 'Chele, yet you are still conflicted. You have to go home eventually, don't you?"

"Home," she echoed, sounding wistful. "I'm not to sure where that is anymore."

Mike cocked his head, surely using that permanent connection between them to his advantage. Bad enough he was a frickin' uber empath, but they had that twin bond and it had never faded, mostly because they were both high psi. "But you are sure who it is."

She wanted to glare, wanted to be angry, but she also needed to talk to someone and her choices had become quite limited. "Darien. We... he... ah shit, I don't know anymore," she grumbled, not certain where to begin.

"Start with the ring." He ran his thumb over the snake adorning her right ring finger.

She ducked her head, not able to meet his eyes. "He asked me to marry him. I said no. He walked away."

"He came back, though. How long did he last? A week?"

"Ten days. Ten miserable days," she told him. "At the time it was all or nothing for him."

"And for you?"

"Me? I just wanted to be with him. I didn't... don't need marriage for that." She knew she sounded defensive, but that didn't make it the truth.

"And Jess and what he did to you had nothing to do with that?" A valid question and one she actually had an answer to.

"Of course it did," she told him bluntly. "But there are other just as valid reasons as well."

"Have you told Darien these reasons?"

"Some of them, yes."

Mike nodded. "Which ones?"

"He wants kids... deserves the chance to be a father. And we both know he won't be able to with me."

Mike looked sympathetic, but didn't go any easier on her. "And does he agree with this, or does he want to be with you anyway?"

"Still wants to marry me."

"He doesn't want to lose you."

She smiled wanly. "He won't, but he can't believe that. He expects me to leave and not return, just like every other woman in his life that he has cared deeply about." She shook her head; certain she was explaining this all wrong.

"You stayed for him."

Of course he had figured it out, he of all people would be the one to understand that when she'd made the decision to stay in San Diego it had been because of Darien. "I had to," she admitted solemnly, not certain Mike would be able to understand the pressure the mental connection to Darien placed on her. The ones with her family, though just as permanent were weaker and did not place such forceful demands on her mind. They were there, yes, but not pulling at her attention constantly. She typically had to focus on a specific person to get any details at all. And given what she now knew about the gland's genetics, it made little sense that the mental bridge between her and Darien was the strongest she had ever experienced, even stronger than the one between her and Mike, her twin brother.

"He doesn't like it when you leave."

That hadn't been hard to pick up on as her mind had been rummaging through that very subject. "He doesn't think I'll come back."

"Or not come back to him. You've told me you essentially have no emotional control when with him, so he must know how you feel. Have you told him?"

Alyx froze, most certainly doing a remarkable deer in the headlights impression.

Mike chuckled. "I'll take that as a no."

"Hey, not like he has either," she groused.

Mike raised one eyebrow at that. "Really?" She nodded. "He asked you to marry him without ever professing his undying love?" The purple prose was just the right touch and made her smile, even though the stating of that truth hurt.

"That would be correct."

"Well, hell, I wouldn't say yes either." He leaned back in his chair, clearly thinking. "Why haven't you? A real reason."

"Let's just say sharing said feeling and articulating it are two very different things. He knows how I feel." A run-around answer, even she had to admit, but the best she could do right at this moment.

"I'm certain he does, but some people need to hear it. So the question is: why can't you tell him?"

She closed her eyes, not wanting to think about exactly why she couldn't say what were probably considered the three most important words in life. "Jess used it as part of his... abuse," she admitted after several long minutes of silence.

Mike sucked in a breath, which made her open her eyes to look at him. For an instant there was pity - for her - and then it was gone as the full meaning of her statement registered. "Christ. Is there anything he didn't do in his efforts to control you?"

"That is a question to which I have no answer. I've researched some of techniques he used, he could have done far worse." She sipped her cooling tea. "He needed me for breeding so had to limit his damage... until he fucked that one up." Talking about this wasn't easy, but with Mike it wouldn't be so bad, she just had to not let the memories that came flooding back stop her.

Once she set down the mug, he grasped her hand tightly in both of his own. "You should have told me. All those years..." He shook his head. "I could have helped, gotten you out of there, hell, beat the bastard to a bloody pulp."

Alyx snorted in amusement. "Mikey, if I had been able to ask for help I would have... In fact, I did, if you recall, sadly it was, what, just weeks before I got grabbed by the Agency." She patted him on the cheek. "I wasn't ready before then."

"But now it has mangled your perception of love," he stated astutely.

She sighed, sitting back in her chair. "So it would appear. In some ways I'm glad he's never said... those words. I don't want what I feel for Darien tangled up with... with Jess. That is not the kind of... of love he deserves."

"How hard was it for you to say that?"

"Very. It's times like this I hate how my memory works." Not the first time she'd voiced that complaint, and doubtful it would be the last.

"You can't avoid that one word forever, especially where your relationship with Darien is concerned." He scooted closer, making certain to look her dead in the eye. "Maybe instead of allowing those old memories to haunt you, you should create some new ones with Darien."

Alyx twitched, she had never even considered that and she had to wonder why the hell not. "You really think it'll be that simple? Proclaim my love a few times and banish over a decade of abusive memories?" She wanted to be angry, wanted to sound bitter, but even she could hear the hope in her voice. She'd spent so much time avoiding those memories and anything that might trigger them that she had never considered rewriting the code. Damn. Forest, meet trees.

"Simple? No. But it might just be worth a try."

…..

The Centre

Blue Cove, Delaware

…

"I send you on a simple job; bring back two subjects and not only do you fail, you fail on a level I have never seen before. Both subjects in the wind, personnel injured, and thousands of dollars of property damage that The Centre is paying for." Mr. Raines wheezed, trying to impress his subordinate with exactly how infuriated he pretended to be. His need for oxygen and inability to draw in a deep breath worked against him in some ways, though based on the widened eyes he probably looked as if he were about to drop dead.

Good, better thought to be weak and be powerful, it would give him an advantage and he would use it expertly.

Raines watched Lyle's jaw tense, probably grinding his teeth in his ire. "Nothing in the information we collected even hinted that she had gained that level of skill. Never mind the fact that she clearly had been warned we were coming and prepared accordingly."

"And now Miss Parker is aware of our interest in her," Mr. Raines pointed out. While it really wouldn't change their plans, it would change the game. Miss Parker might still be charged with bringing Jarod back to the loving bosom of The Centre, but everyone knew she remained reluctant to do so. Too many ties between herself and Jarod, and the loss of the man she had thought to be her father, had damaged her allegiance to The Centre and more importantly The Triumvirate. She would need to be brought back into the fold fully if the long term goals were going to be achieved.

"I'm pretty damn certain she was aware long before she arrived."

True enough, given the video and emails intercepted between Jarod and Sydney. There was little chance Miss Parker had been unaware. The question was whether or not they had discovered the project involved. Raines had to assume they had, which meant he would need to tread carefully and make certain the damage would be kept to a minimum.

"Yet they did not attempt to capture her," Raines stated.

"Of course not," Lyle sneered. "That would reveal she had knowledge about the girl and the project. She wouldn't risk being able to cry plausible deniability."

"Neither would you in the same situation," Raines pointed out,

Lyle snorted. "True." He shifted, plainly wanting to pace to vent the anger and irritation he did not hide well. "This is going to be a problem."

"Perhaps," Raines agreed. "Care to explain how the girl got the drop on you?"

Lyle fumed, face pinking over in what was most likely a combination of embarrassment and anger. "She knew we were coming," he growled, hands balling fists.

"Sydney, of course."

Lyle shook his head. "I doubt they arrived more than five minutes before we did. If they had made a call I would have known about it." He appeared to be beyond frustrated at his impotence at capturing the girl. "No, I would guess that her prized ability is just as functional as the rest of them."

As expected. But Raines could not let him off easy for the failure. "Which you should have been prepared for." Not that there was any chance of that. If the girl was even half of what they had been told, there had never been a chance she would be taken this time.

Lyle shook his head. "You don't get it. She knew we were coming. Our tranq darts didn't get anywhere near her. We were powerless."

Of course they had been. Mr. Raines narrowed his eyes, trying to impress upon Mr. Lyle the epic nature of his failure, "Where is she now?"

"We don't know."

Not what Raines wanted to hear. They needed eyes on the girl; it was the only way to learn more about her abilities and weaknesses. Especially her weaknesses.

Lyle quickly added, "She did not leave with her partners and due to the circumstances at the time, we did not have eyes on her. I will know as soon as she returns to San Diego, we can grab her then."

Raines shook his head and walked over to his desk, sitting carefully, making certain not to tangle the lines for his oxygen tank. "No. She knows about us now, and will be wary. Find her. Watch her. I want regular reports. We will reassess the feasibility of bringing her in in three months."

Lyle nodded. Clearly relieved he would not be facing her any time in the near future. Jarod may have been trouble, but the girl... the girl was dangerous and not under their control, how she reacted in any given situation could be in a way detrimental to his continued existence. "I'll arrange it personally."

"Yes, you will," Raines said in clear dismissal and Lyle took the opportunity to escape.

Once gone from the room, Raines turned to his phone and pressed a single button of the dozens there. "Send him in," he ordered.

Less than a minute later the door opened and young man walked in.

"Well?" Raines questioned.

"Three angles, all crisp and clear. An exceptional example of her skills."

"Restrict access for the time being. I want the video examined in detail to determine exactly what she is capable of."

"As you wish, sir. Do you still want it included with the Oracle data?"

Now, that was a good question. Given that Sydney had most likely discovered and accessed the project files, it would be prudent to keep this new data elsewhere. "No. Create a new archive for this. Send me the info when it is up and running."

"Of course, sir. I'll have it ready by tonight."

Raines waited for the man to leave before turning to his computer and sliding the first of several disks into the drive, the raw video impressive all on it's own. Meeting Jarod at this time may have been unplanned, but clearly it had had one of the suspected and desired effects: her power increasing by an order of magnitude. Just imagine what the two of them could do together.

He looked forward to finding out.

…..

Private Residence

San Diego, California

…

The box that sat outside her door was bigger than the super had suggested. She gave it the once over and, while she discovered electronics within, they appeared to be harmless and not tied to something potentially explosive. There was no return address, but the courier sticker was a company she recognized and that she knew to be legitimate. With only a twinge of concern she opened the door and shuffled the box inside with her feet. She tossed her other mail onto her dining table, hanging her coat and bag on the hooks next to the door.

She'd been home four days and had been going non-stop since arriving. Some serious debriefing had turned into several all-night sessions shoring up the security at the Agency. The Official, via Drake mostly, had begun making cautious inquiries into The Centre, and not liking what they had found so far. Not that there was much they could do. Protecting her from them would be a challenge at best and impossible at worst. Knowing they watched her gave them some small advantage if they could catch the watchers. Plotting was in the works to do exactly that, but until then she would just have to be cautious and hope to god they didn't try to grab her while sleeping or out of town when Agency protection would be nonexistent.

Nothing new in her life these days.

She took the time to open a bottle of wine and pour a glass before dealing with the box. She slid it over to the sofa and sat down. She grabbed a stray butter knife off the end table, wondering how she had managed to fail at putting it into the dishwasher, and used it to cautiously slice the tape on the box.

Parting the packing paper and bubble wrap she found a thick manila envelope with Leverage written across it. Deeper in she found the DSA and dozens of disks for it. Lots of information for her to go through. Part of her dreaded it, wishing that none of this had happened, that her past, her family was exactly as she remembered it, but it wasn't and while meeting Jarod had brought some very harsh realizations to light, she regretted nothing. He was a damn good man and she was honored to have had the chance to meet him.

Just as she was about to open the envelope her phone binged, alerting her to a new text message. She hoped from Darien, but had the feeling it wouldn't be. He hadn't responded to a single text or call since she'd gotten back. Admittedly, he and Bobby had been working screwy and long hours on a job, but did it take that long to just type hi?

She flipped open the phone to see the words 'You home?' from a Scrooge McDuck.

She smiled, not the least bit concerned about being texted by a cartoon character as she had a good idea who the human behind the cartoon nom de plume was. She replied with, 'yes.'

Mere moments later came, 'Video call.'

She walked over to her computer and woke it up. She'd added the video conferencing software as soon as she'd gotten home for just this reason. Of course, she'd made a few tweaks to the system to guarantee security and privacy, but this was her first opportunity to really test the system. Hopefully it would work as planned.

Mere seconds after the program finished loading the request came in and she accepted. She and Jarod had exchanged emails and texts since they'd parted ways, but had not spoken directly, they hadn't really needed to either, so she had to wonder why after just over a week apart he felt the need to speak more directly. Maybe he just missed her smiling countenance. She grinned as the connection went live.

"Alyx, did you get the package I sent you?" Jarod asked her without preamble.

"What? No hello for your wayward sister?" Alyx questioned, the smile fading at the urgency she sensed even across the intervening distance. "Yeah, today."

"Have you looked at it yet?" Jarod looked nervous or shocked, perhaps. Like he had when Sydney had revealed that the two of them were related.

"Just opened the box, haven't gone over any of it in detail. Why?" She wanted to close her eyes to get a better feel of him. She had found it shockingly simple to differentiate between him and Darien, in fact, after the adventure in Montana, she found it far easier to separate and compartmentalize all those she had a direct connection to. Darien still had the strongest link, but it remained the one she tried the hardest to block, especially with him still seemingly upset with her.

"Get it, would you."

"Sure." She left the computer and fetched the box, hefting it and balancing it in her arms. It was as heavy as it looked, but she didn't feel the need to use her powers to just carry it across the room. Setting it on the floor by her feet she sat back down in the chair. "Okay, what am I after?"

"In the envelope, a file marked Family Tree," he told her, look disturbingly solemn.

Alyx found the file and thumbed through the photos stopping in shock at one of a dark haired blue-eyed young man. "Who is this?"

"My brother Kyle," Jarod answered. "I was rather surprised myself."

"It's Mikey. He really is my brother… our brother." Alyx didn't know what else to say. "Have you told him?"

"Not yet. Kyle was... damaged by Raines and never had a real chance at... at anything." Jarod shook his head, the memories not happy ones. "They tore my family apart."

"Jarod, you can't change the past..." She grinned, shaking her head. "Least I don't think you can." He managed a hint of a smile in response. "But you can make your future what you want it to be. And you have family that will happily help."

He sighed heavily. "I know, and I didn't mean to dismiss you and Michael out of hand, but... Is it greedy of me to want it all?"

"No. It just means you are human." She wished she could wrap her arms about him, hold him close and reassure him that she would be there for him and would do anything in her power to reunite his... their family. "Mike is running DNA tests, perhaps you should do the same."

Jarod grimaced. "And use what for a comparison?"

Alyx knew he would balk at this, but they all needed the truth, needed the details of their existence to truly have the footing to stand up against The Centre. "Ethan. You said he was your half-brother. Your father and Miss Parker's mother, correct?"

Jarod nodded. "Yes, but..." He stopped clearly thinking about the implications of doing this. "If Ethan really is my brother we'll have alleles in common, if not-"

"Then Major Charles is not you biological father," she finished when he seemed unable to. "Of course, that is presuming you were told the truth about Major Charles being the father."

Jarod rubbed his face in his hands. "This sucks."

"Yep, it does. But it's not all bad is it, Uncle Jarod?" He might not be related to Ethan, but he was most certainly uncle to her four hellions.

Jarod managed to find a grin for her. "How did you know?"

"I recognize those pictures behind you." Especially since she had been there just four days ago. "I can be reasonably certain you are related to the holy terrors you are visiting."

"No, not so bad." He produced a wide grin from somewhere in his depths. "You have wonderful children, Michele. You should be here with them."

Alyx sighed softly. Yes, she probably should be with them, wanted to be with them, but it would put them in far too much danger. "Jarod..." She shook her head. "I have my reasons for choosing as I did."

"I know. And now that The Centre has taken full notice of you, coming home is even less viable than before." He turned his head, looking at something off camera. "They deserve as normal a life as possible and I will do what I can to assure that."

"Thank you." There was more she wanted to say, but it should be said in person, not via video from thousands of miles away.

"How are you, really?"

"I'm okay. I'll survive one way or another." Alyx tried to smile, but failed utterly. "Thanks for the information. It'll be useful."

"Alyx if you need anything..." Jarod began.

"Back at you. Go get to know your nieces and nephew. They need as many guardians as they can get," Alyx told him meaning every word. The kids needed family as much as Jarod did. Perhaps becoming a part of hers would ease some of the sadness he felt.

"I will."

The screen went dark and she closed the video chat window, leaving the default wallpaper in place. Alyx picked up her glass and drank down another large portion of wine without really tasting it. Part of her didn't want to deal with any of this, her life had been a topsy-turvy hot mess for far too long now and it seemed every time things had settled into some semblance of normal the rug was pulled out from under her feet yet again. With a mutter she decided to set up the DSA, then cook dinner and begin watching the videos while she ate.

She had tested Darien inviting him over if and when he got finished with work, but hadn't even received anything in reply. She got that she was upset with her, but had hoped he'd at least talk to her and give her a chance to explain, to try and make amends, to fix them. She could not live with a broken relationship. She could survive being only friends, partners, but that was not what she wanted, or what she needed.

Wine in hand she walked into her kitchen to decide what she wanted to make for dinner.

…..

He flipped open the phone and read the text for the hundredth time. 'Done for the day. Stop by and say hi if you want.' It had been sent hours ago, while he and Hobbes had just handed over the stake out duties to Hill and Alice, freeing them to go home and catch a few hours sleep before starting this rodeo all over again tomorrow. It was late, too late to go over to her place, and yet... yet he really wanted to. Yeah, he'd been pretty much ignoring her texts and calls, but he had been working... Though that excuse had worn thin, especially when Hobbes had been pushing him to call her before she got shipped off again.

He glanced at the clock on the phone, cringing at the time revealed, betting she had already gone to bed for the night. Almost without conscious volition he keyed in, 'You still up?'

Within seconds the reply, 'Yep, have lasagna if you're hungry,' appeared on his screen.

Well, there went that faint hope at continuing to avoid her. 'Be by in a bit.' At that Darien had to stop and take stock. Did he really want to not spend time with her? Part of him thought that was a most wonderful idea, the longer he waited to talk to her, the longer it took for her to officially dump him, and while angry and upset he still wanted her. And then there was the other part, the part that kept telling him he was a total and complete idiot and she had no intention of running off with Jarod, much less anyone else, and wanted to be with him, just like she always said.

He sighed, tempted to text back that he needed to go home to sleep, but instead headed to his car intending to do as he'd said, and go to her place.

He arrived a fair thirty minutes later, having taken the longest route possible and with a stop for a couple bottles of wine just to delay as much as possible. The time had just made him question his decision to stop by even more. He'd had a long day, needed to input calories, sleep for a dozen hours, even though he knew he'd only get six if that, and... and do laundry, damn it. But he'd put this off long enough.

He pressed the buzzer, something he hadn't done in a very long time, but didn't feel right using his key, not tonight.

She slid open the door, in person, a tentative smile on her face. "Hey, bub, forget your key?"

He inhaled deeply and had to smother the groan at the smells emanating from her apartment. Lasagna, yes, but also garlic and bread, her homemade garlic knots if he wasn't mistaken. "You are cruel," he stated, then held out the bottles of wine for her to take.

"Yep, I most certainly am," she agreed, waving him inside. She juggled the bottles and shut the door, while he took off his coat and hung it next to hers.

He looked over the room while she walked to her kitchen with the wine. He could not help but notice the big ass brushed steel briefcase with what looked like an ancient video screen mounted into it. He had no clue what it might be, but it hadn't been part of the household accessories the last time he'd been here... several weeks ago. Damn, had it really been that long? There also appeared to be files on the table, the logo on them not one he recognized. "You working a new case?"

"Not exactly," she told him. "Hungry?"

His stomach growled loudly, answering the question for him. He'd had dinner around five, but it had been fast food and not nearly as satisfying as it could have been. Even though he'd done little more than sit and chat with Hobbes the entire time, his metabolism practically demanded that he eat often and in seemingly copious amounts. Truthfully, he was always hungry; sometimes it just wasn't food he hungered for.

He wanted her, right here, right now, and part of him hated that, and that it wouldn't change. "Yeah," he answered needlessly. "Food would be good."

She smiled and nodded and he followed her into the kitchen. He opened the bottles of wine while she set up plates for each of them. They carried the repast to the living room, where she made room on the coffee table by the simple expedient of moving the case and files into a semi-neat pile on the floor. "Sit," she mock-ordered, "and eat. You look like you've been living on In-n-Out for days."

"That's 'cause I have," he confirmed as he sat down on the wing of the sectional, placing the plate on the end of the table. He dug right in, just about all of the lasagna and two garlic knots gone before he came up for air and some wine. "Good lord, where did you find this?"

"Find? I made this from scratch." She shook her head and smiled. "I was in the mood to cook."

He glanced from her to the files and new toy on the floor. "Cook or avoid dealing with your... case?" Based on the look that crossed her face it was far more the latter. "Can I help?"

She shook her head. "Not really, moral support more than anything. And it's not a case, it's... information about The Centre."

"And Jarod," Darien grumbled, wondering why he should be surprised that her new boy toy had sent her gifts already. He quickly drank down the rest of the wine and refilled the glass.

"Yes, and Jarod." She sighed softly, leaning back into the cushions. "I'm willing to talk if you are willing to listen."

Darien felt his heart drop into his stomach, making the so recently eaten food sit uncomfortably. The talking part they needed to do, but wanting? Not really. But it had to be done, he got that. This limbo they'd been living in just wouldn't cut it anymore. "Did you sleep with him?" he asked, deciding to get the big one over with right away.

She remained cool and didn't even flinch at his bluntness, which kind of surprised him. "Don't you mean did I have sex with him?"

Well, looked like she would be being just as blunt. "Okay, yeah, that's what I mean."

"No, we did not have, sex, yes, we slept together to keep warm," she told him. She knuckled one eye, appearing tired all of a sudden.

"Then what was with all the hand holding back in Montana?" He felt confused. The looks, the contact, the trust she had exhibited back in Montana seemed to suggest something beyond casual friendship. Hell, it reminded him of when she'd hooked up with Garrett, that instant trust, which, in that case, had led to a relationship between the two. One that had not lasted long and ultimately benefited Darien, but still...

"I know you want answers, and I promise I will give them, but I need you to not make assumptions or rush to judgment. Can you do that, please?" Her voice didn't change throughout, which meant she was being extremely careful to not broadcast her emotions. And that could not bode well for what was to come.

"I... I'll try," he offered, not able to promise anything at this point. Granted, he was expecting the worst, his hope that this conversation would go in his favor slim at best.

She nodded. "Yes, I care about Jarod. Yes, he cares about me."

"But..." Darien shook his head, not understanding. There could only be one reasonable response to that. "I get it. I... I won't get in the way." Damn, that had been hard to say, but it was also the correct thing to do. If she could be happy with Jarod, then she deserved the opportunity.

Alyx blinked. "Won't get in the... Darien, Jarod is my brother."

Darien froze, confusion and relief coursing through him for long moments as he absorbed her statement. "Your... your brother?"

She nodded. "To be more precise, I am his female clone."

Darien sat there stunned. She and Jarod weren't going to be riding off in the sunset together. He had no idea what to say, had no clue what this meant in the grand scheme of things. "Brother?"

She laughed softly. "Yes, Darien, we just had our very own Star Wars moment."

He had to stop and rewind the conversation to get what she meant, but once he had, managed a chuckle in response. "So, you and Jarod..."

"Are not going to be running off together," she told him point blank. "All of this," She waved at the weird computer and assorted files," is to help me keep The Centre and their thugs at bay." She scratched the side of her neck waiting for Darien to say something.

"So, what about Mike? Is he your brother?" He didn't know what else to ask at her sudden and surprising revelation. Yeah, he was thrilled that she would not be leaving him for Jarod, but she had also just revealed that the person she'd thought she was, the person she so desperately tried to hold onto wasn't whom she'd thought. And that must be fucking with her mind right about now. Hell, had been for nearly two weeks now.

He could only be amazed that she remained so calm in the face of her entire existence being ripped to shreds.

"Yes, as it turns out he is actually my, and Jarod's brother."

"How?"

She got up and walked around the coffee table and to the files. She sorted through them, pulled out a single sheet and handed it to him. She sat next to him instead of walking all the way back around. It was a headshot of Mike, but something felt off, and it only took a moment to figure out what: both eyes were blue. "He's wearing a contact?" he guessed.

She shook her head. "Nope, that is not Mikey. That," She tapped the image on the nose, "is Jarod's full brother Kyle."

Oh, holy shit. "So, Mike's a clone too. This is so twisted."

"Man, tell me about it. I went back east to get Mikey up to speed on the situation."

"You could have told me Jarod was your brother when we were in Montana." He set the picture down and turned to look at her, the bruises on her cheeks having long since faded thanks to her enhanced healing ability.

She sighed. "Yeah, I could have, but would you have believed me?"

Okay, so she had a point. Between the Madness, and the wonky symptoms caused by the new inhibitor he probably would not have believed anything she had said even if she had the proof right there with her. And speaking of proof..."Aside from the uncanny resemblance of Mike and this Kyle, how do you know that any of this is true?"

"We have a paper trail proving my parents used this NuGenesis clinic for IVF, and we're running a full spectrum of DNA tests to verify all this, but it'll take a couple of weeks." She got to her feet, striding away from him, and ran her hands through her hair. "I don't know who I am anymore," she whispered, sounding exhausted.

"Why is that? You're the same person you always were." He couldn't deny the weirdness of this news, and now understood Bobby's ongoing worry about her. "Has anything else changed?"

"Maybe?" She stopped across the room and turned back to look at him. "Meeting Jarod has... changed me... in here." She tapped her right temple.

"What does that mean?"

"Good fucking question," she groused. "I'm gonna be up front here, okay?"

"Oh-kay." This didn't sound good. He got to his feet and walked over and set his hands on her shoulders. "I said I'd listen, and that's what I'm going to do. Is this something I can help with?"

"I... I don't know. When I touched Jarod that one time, I got more than just info, I got him, and the link is permanent." She met his eyes, fear of his reaction to her statement obvious.

He didn't move, taking the time to figure out what that really meant. "He's family, right? Don't you have a link with Mikey and your kids?" She nodded. "Well, then that makes sense then. Why is it so important? You gonna run off with him anyway, to hide from The Centre?"

Bobby and Jarod had given as many details about the situation as they could, tried to explain the whole Pretender thing, but since he hadn't been quite right in the head, most of it had been lost on him. He had planned on asking Alyx, eventually and while now seemed like a good time, he sensed she wanted to move the conversation away from Jarod and The Centre and onto other, more personal topics.

"No. I have no plans to run away." She reached up and set fingers against his cheek, eyes drifting shut for a long moment.

"But you will still leave." And he hated that she would, hated that he would be left behind time and time again, that half of every month he was not part of her life. And he wanted to be part of her life, wanted to come home at the end of long day to find her waiting for him, wanted the perfect life with the perfect wife no matter how unreasonable that was. She was no housewife. She was a spy and worked damn hard and he wouldn't change a thing about her, he just wished she felt the same about him.

She opened her eyes, gaze oddly melancholy. "Yes, but I will always come back."

He shook his head, not believing her. Couldn't risk believing her and have it be a lie, have his heart broken into pieces yet again. He doubted he'd survive her loss another time. Twice had been far too many already.

"C'mon, D. the Official sold me to the CIA, married me off to a prince for fuck's sake and I came back." She paced away, and he turned following her as she moved about the apartment.

Hard to argue with that, especially since she'd gotten shot and nearly killed to pull off that crazy stunt. Of course, she could have warned him about what she had planned; there'd been opportunity, but she had chosen not to and he had spent an entire month thinking she had died. And that had only been the first time she'd done that, he'd damn near been shattered the second time she'd been forced to fake her death.

Little wonder he didn't want her out of his sight for any length of time. "But what if you don't want to?" he asked, wondering if sounded as mournful as he felt.

"Why wouldn't I want to?" She stopped and spun about to face him. "I gave up my family for you," she stated in a harsh whisper.

"Gave up your... How do you figure that?" The irritation must have been in his voice based on the narrowing of her eyes.

"Yes, Darien. You gave me the option to go home, to start over, with no memories of this," she waved a hand lazily about, "and I chose to stay... because of you." She turned away, one hand rubbing her forehead as if a headache had begun to build. "I won't marry you, because I can't give you the family you want and deserve, but that does not mean I don't want to spend my life with you."

"But you'd let me go if I found someone else?"

"Yes. So long as you were happy, I'd support you."

She'd told him that before, had even let him walk away, had walked away herself when he'd told her to, so he knew she would do exactly as she'd said, probably support him in the relationship no matter where it led. Damn. "I don't want anyone else," he told her. "I just don't know what to do about us."

"I have some thoughts on that if willing to listen a while longer." She crossed her arms over her chest, sounding desperate and hopeful.

He could walk, could drop it right here and now, move on, but while he feared what she might say, how she might hurt him if they remained together, he didn't want anyone else. They needed to work this out and now was as good a time as any to give it a try. He was here now, might as well listen to what she had to say. "Okay."

She managed a flicker of a smile. "Can we sit, please?"

He nodded and returned to the spot he'd staked out earlier. While she moved about the coffee table he poured each of them more wine, sensing they both needed it. He handed her a glass and said, "Drink." Only after she had swallowed a nervous mouthful did he say, "What do you have in mind?"

"Work is work and us is us."

"And never the twain shall meet?" he added, mostly as a joke, but she nodded. "Okay, why?"

"Because I don't want what either of us might have to do on the job to impact our relationship."

"Uh," he said in confusion, not really having a clue what she meant.

"Darien, I know you've been sent out on jobs where you've had to persuade your mark with, shall we say, a personal touch."

Well, crap, he hadn't realized she knew about any of that, it wasn't like he talked about it. "Alyx, I-"

She shook her head cutting him off. "I'm not angry. Once Claire realized you had full control of the Quicksilver even during... intimate moments, there was little chance the Official wouldn't send you out on jobs where you'd be using your looks to your advantage."

Darien felt stunned. Yeah, he'd played the part a few times, screwed it up a few too, bad enough that Hobbes had threatened him with CTS training. Whatever the hell that was. But those women, and one guy, much to his dismay, had meant nothing, been nothing but the job. "The Official sends you on jobs like that, doesn't he?"

She laughed. "He married me off, remember? Hell, my first big job, with Kirkland Geofferies..." She trailed off shaking her head. "They are just the job, even when I do sleep with them."

He felt his heart drop at the words. She had slept with... with the marks and not told him. He was tempted to just get up and storm out, but remained still, instead draining the glass of wine and pouring more, emptying the bottle. "You never told me."

She sighed. "Because it would hurt you to know. Because you have this tendency to get unreasonably jealous if another man we're working with even looks at me. You ever wonder why when we do work together these days the 'Fish never sends me on a seduction job?"

"Oh," he mumbled. "I just... well, crap." He leaned back, running his hands through his hair. "And you don't get jealous?"

She shrugged. "I can't afford to, besides, I'd know if you had fallen for someone else." She tapped her temple.

"Right." Kind of unfair that she'd have inside info on him, but at the same time damn uncomfortable he imagined. She'd know what he was doing when and with who and… And she had never said a word about any of it. "So, we just leave work at the door? Even if we spent the afternoon screwing someone else?"

"Do you want to know? 'Cause I'll fill you in if you'd find that a viable solution." She sounded oddly hurt and he could only wonder why.

"No. Unless something happens that I... we... the other needs to know about. We leave work at the door." It was the only reasonable solution. It wouldn't be easy, for either of them, the keeping of secrets, but if they were work secrets - they had each done any number of jobs that they could not discuss at all - that he was pretty certain he could live with it and that was the important part. "Is... is this a subject we can revisit if necessary?" Tentative, yes, but he got the distinct impression she had a goal and was slowly leading both of them towards it.

"Of course. Darien, I don't intend to dictate rules in our relationship. I know I have my issues, and can't easily talk about some things, but I'm going to try." She shifted, swirling the wine remaining in her glass, but didn't drink. "Starting right now."

"Alyx..."

She shook her head and he shut up. She'd been blocking him but good since he'd arrived, but now her emotions leaked out, her desperate need to say what she needed to say mixed with fear of his response to those words that were yet to be. He did the only thing that made sense and nodded, encouraging her to continue.

"You know Jess abused me, both physically and mentally. Part of that was to use... how I felt about him to manipulate me." She turned away, unable to face him while she spoke, as if she thought he would blame her for what that shithead of a husband had done to her.

He put down the glass of wine and moved, settling next to her on the sofa. He grasped one of her hands, twining their fingers and felt her first stiffen, then relax at the contact. "In what way?" he prompted, hoping to ease the pain on her heart as she spoke.

She managed to meet his eyes. "He used my... my love for him to try to break me."

"Damn," Darien muttered, having suspected that, but only now having it confirmed. Little wonder she resisted her feelings for him for so long.

"When I came here, agreed to work for the Agency, I promised myself I would do it alone, that I would never find myself beholden to another... and then I met you." She gave his hand a squeeze, her emotions a tangled mess that he could not make heads nor tails of. "I... you know how I feel about you, but it has never been enough, and I'm sorry for that. Jess twisted me up so bad that my perspective on... on love is just as twisted."

"Love? Alyx, what are you saying?" Hope surged within him, hope that his concerns about her feelings for him had been nothing but fluff and bother.

She sucked in a deep breath and released it slowly. "I mean when I hear that... that word my memory brings up a selection of less than happy images in all their full Technicolor glory, complete with surround sound.

Darien should have known that, her perfect memory wasn't just words or images, but the full spectrum of emotions, a replay of exactly what had occurred. Little wonder she'd never done more than share how she felt viscerally, she couldn't, not without warping what she felt for him. "So what has changed?"

"Someone, with far more intelligence than me obviously, suggested that maybe I should try creating some new memories, some good memories to associate with that word. And I think he's right." She turned about, drawing her legs up onto the sofa and looked right into his eyes. "I may not be able to say it often, but that makes it no less true. I love you, Darien Fawkes, and will do whatever it takes to keep you in my life."

Darien felt his heart stop for a long moment before jerking back into startled motion at triple the speed. His fingers and toes felt icy cold and he knew without looking that Quicksilver coated them, and he swallowed with some difficulty, trying to get his heart rate back under control before he disappeared completely. It was only after he calmed and could hear more than the blood pounding in his ears that he fully absorbed the declaration she'd just made.

Only seconds had passed since she had spoke, time seeming to have slowed in direct proportion to the increase of his heartbeat. With deftness he plucked the empty glass from her hand, set it aside, and then pounced, his lips finding hers as he tumbled her onto her back, hands buried in her hair. She seemed stunned at first, but then her body softened under his. Her curves fitting perfectly against his firmer frame. Just as she always had. That disparity in height vanishing once horizontal.

That wall in her mind she'd been desperately holding onto in an effort to keep her emotions from influencing him fell apart, rendering him momentarily immobile. So much fear, such desperate hope, and under it all that ever present sense of peace. Now, he understood, that peace was due to him, to his being in her life.

He shifted, arms braced beside her head to look down at her. "You love me?"

She nodded, biting her lower lip as if unsure she should repeat the words aloud.

"Well, that's a good thing I s'pose," he told her, hoping to garner a smile instead of the far too serious look currently adorning her features.

"And... and why is that?" Her voice actually shook on the words, afraid that now she had made the ultimate statement that he would follow in her former husband's footsteps and simply use her feelings to get what he wanted and then toss her away when she was no longer of any real use.

" 'Cause I fell for you the first time we met." He lowered his head and kissed her tenderly on the forehead, reveling in the barely audible sigh she allowed to escape.

"I beat you up the first time we met," she pointed out, a smile trying to curve her lips upward.

"Yep, you did, but I kinda deserved it," he agreed, trailing kisses along the curve of her cheek, down her neck, then back to that insanely sensitive spot below her ear, her head turning just enough to grant him better access. "I love you," he whispered, feeling her shiver in reaction, "and will do whatever it takes to keep you in my life." He bit her on the side of the neck, just hard enough to make her gasp, but not nearly hard enough to truly cause her pain.

"Shit," she muttered, her body completely limp and pliable beneath him.

He could feel the conflicting emotions his words had stirred up, but continued his languorous exploration of her body, making every effort to erase at least one of those horrible memories with those he created right now. Lips against the skin of her throat he asked, "What?"

"That... that's the first time you've said that to... to me," she stated, voice shaking, though in surprise or relief he couldn't be certain.

"I know. I just... I was chicken," he admitted a touch ruefully and it was true enough. Given his propensity for a decided lack of self-worth, his ill luck with women and relationships, he could, he supposed, justify being gun shy about admitting his feelings first. He just hadn't had a clue she had some of the same issues. She'd had one major relationship in her life and it had been used to beat her down and control her. Little wonder she'd fought him so hard, when he had pushed ever harder to get her to admit what he had known all along - that she loved him and wanted to be with him.

And in that moment realization struck and everything clicked into place. The whys he'd asked over and over again, the questions that had come up, none of them answered, simply because he hadn't had the courage to ask her. Fearing she would retreat behind that mask she'd worn for so long, and never come out again. She might not have been able to say how she felt, but she had shown him in everything she did. Working with Kevin to find a way to get the gland out and, when that failed, to go ahead and fund the research on her own. She allowed him to be himself, hell, encouraged him even. Saw him, Darien Fawkes, and accepted him as who he was, flaws and all, and even after all the horrible things he'd done to her, the accusations, the hurtful commentary, even after all of it, she still loved him.

Damn, could he be a bigger fool?

Quite possibly, he had to admit, but he would make every effort to refrain for the next little while so as to make this a positive memory for her.

He sighed softly. "I don't know why you put up with me."

She grinned. "I've told you before, to reach items on high shelves."

He laughed and kissed her soundly, reveling in her presence for long minutes. When he came up for air he laughed at the look of utter contentment on her face. He shifted, propping his head up on one arm. "So, does this mean we can stop avoiding each other?"

"Hey," She poked him with one finger firmly into his chest, "I have not been the one doing the avoiding the last week."

Okay, that had indeed been him, and he was damn glad he'd decided to come over tonight, to hell with the stakeout, or whatever crap the Official came up with. "Sorry about that."

"S'okay. I get you were... confused about the Jarod thing." She shifted slightly, that one finger now tracing random shapes across his torso instead of trying to leave fingertip shaped bruises on his pecs. "I was wondering..." She stopped cold, shaking her head. "Never mind."

"Wondering what?" His free hand found its way into her hair, twining the strands about his fingers, enjoying the softness of the curls.

"I... I was wondering if you might want to move in together?" The question was tentative at best, but also totally unexpected.

"Uh, left field?"

She chuckled. "No, not really. I want to show you I mean this, that I want this to work between us, and for you to have some assurance that I'm not going anywhere and that when I come home, that I'll be coming home to you." She shrugged, her hand moving to cup his cheek, thumb trailing lightly across his lips.

He gently bit her thumb, causing her to suck in a breath, color flushing her face. "That would be nice," he told her, his heart again pounding at the idea alone. "Your place or mine." Hers would be the better choice, obviously, given the miniscule size of his so-called apartment. No way her stuff would fit there, while she even had room for his pool table; once he convinced her, that is.

"Actually, I was thinking we'd find a new place. Together."

Now that sounded like a grand idea. A place of their own, where they could start a real life together. "I like the sound of that."

"Is that a yes?" Still tentative, as if she feared even now that he would reject her.

Well, he would just have to prove his commitment to them and to making some new memories for her to savor. "Yes," he agreed. "But we'll save the apartment hunting for tomorrow if that's okay."

"Why?" she asked, even as he leaned down to press his lips against the hollow of her throat, tongue moving hotly along her skin, tasting her as if starving. Hungry? No, ravenous would be a far better description, and it was going to take quite some time for him to be sated, of that he was quite sure.

He lifted his head to look her right in the eyes. "Because you are going to be otherwise occupied for the next few hours," he told her, shifting so as to gain better access to the buttons of her shirt and begin undoing them.

"But-"

He shut her up with a searing kiss that ended with her shirtless and demanding that he continue with the distracting from the speaking thing.

When he finally allowed her to come up for air, she smiled, a real smile and suggested they adjourn to her bed, for while the sofa was comfy, there was far more room to play under canopy. Putting action to the words he scooped her up in his arms and carried her there.

She laughed as he lowered her onto the bed, shedding his shoes and shirt before joining her on the wide expanse of cushioned comfort. She lay there, hair fanned out around her head, the light picking up the golden highlights imbedded within, her eyes a bright glorious silver counterpoint to the red and gold. "Damn," he muttered, feeling that obnoxious tingle at the back of his skull signaling that he'd be spending half his time fighting for control.

"What?" she asked, reaching for him, encouraging him to come closer.

"Just plotting how to make this particular memory an exceptional one." He dipped his head down to place a delicate kiss on her lips, while doing so focusing on that mental connection between them to make certain she could feel everything he did, to make certain that she knew without a doubt that he loved her.

She whimpered and reached for him, giving up on her vain efforts to not allow her emotions to consume him and in an instant they were both swept away.

"Coming home from very lonely places, all of us go a little mad: whether from great personal success, or just an all-night drive, we are the sole survivors of a world no one else has ever seen."

And such sweet madness it can be.

.

.

finis