I feel like i should never ever promise to stay on track and update regularly because it never works out haha, i'm super busy guys so sorry! hope you like

I dont own anything but the plot yo!

EPOV

I skim my eyes over the bathroom as I get out of the shower. All of my belongings I got from the store on my way back here are neatly displayed. A bar of soap, face wash, Chap Stick, and a razor.

Broken sobs and the obnoxious stench of alcohol and blood burned my nostrils. My eyes felt like someone scratched them out. My lungs could no longer function as I felt the world collapse around me.

I started crying again, crying harder than before. Memories of those days make me fall back into that depression that had hold of me for so long. My heart pounded and my head hurt.

I picked up my phone and called the first person on my contacts list

"Hey Edward" Alice chirped through the phone

Another sod escaped and I couldn't use my voice, "Oh my god Edward are you ok? What's going on?"

When she still didn't get a response she hung up

I forced myself to stay on the bathroom floor because I knew I would regret it if I got up.

I don't know how long I sat there crying until Alice flung herself at me

"Oh my god what happened?" she whispered into my ear, wrapping her petite body around mine

"I…I" I cleared my throat and rubbed my face, "I don't really know"

"Honey, let's go get some lunch or something" she said, getting up and looking in the mirror

"I'm sorry for making you drive all the way ov…" I paused, "Wait? I thought you spent the night?"

"I was actually on my way home, but that doesn't matter love, your more important" she said giving me a sad smile

APOV

I and Edward have been friends for as long as I can remember. And I think I've been in love with him for about half that time.

I remember when we were younger, maybe seven or eight. Edward and I were having one of our usual play dates; I had wanted to learn how to fly, as most kids did. Personally at the age of seven I thought it was totally reasonable to swing as high as possible on the swing set and I would be able to just fly off. Unfortunately, that was not the case. When I jumped off of the swing set I flew off and scraped my knee on the pavement. When Edward herd my cries he rushed to my side, picked me up and carried me home. My house was a five minute walk, and according to my mother it was a very safe part of town so she would just let us wander around. When we got home my mother (according to her) was at the store picking up snacks for us. Edward use to be completely freaked out by blood but in this case he sucked it up, washed my wounds and wrapped me all up.

I think that was when I realized that I loved him.

But by the age of about 18 I figured that my love was unrequited. And unrequited love really sucks but it's something you just have to deal with.

Don't get me wrong, I've dropped a lot of hints and he just didn't pick them up

Even thought things with us were strictly platonic, we were as close as two friends could have been… up until the world completely crashed around me and Edward tried to end his life.

I still remember those last days…

"Alice" Edward sobbed over the phone

"Edward what's the matter? Did something happen?" it's not like Edward to cry so I was on edge

"Alice I can't take this anymore, He's gone" he sobbed into the phone for a few seconds before continuing, "He left me Al I … I love him so much he doesn't understand what I'm going through."

I paused.

What.

"Edward you're really scaring me" I breathed into the phone, tears running down my cheeks

"I love you" he said in a low whisper, "Whatever happens I love you" he said, sounding drunk out of his mind

The second he hung up a raced over to his place. Only to find him hanging on by a thread

Then he was gone for two years, and I tried to move on but it really didn't work. On the outside I was normal, but on the inside I was a huge mess

After he came back. After he told me he was gay. I pretended to be shocked because obviously he wouldn't remember coming out to me the night he attempted suicide, and I really was happy for him.

Ring ring ring

"Hey Edward" I said, happy he called, but all I heard was a gasp and then broken sobs and I knew something was wrong

Rushing over I ran into the bathroom and threw my arms about the broken boy that lay on the cold tiles of the bathroom flood.

No matter what happens

Wither he's gay, straight, or bi

I will love him

With everything I've got

EPOV

After having a panic attack in the bathroom I asked Alice to drop me off at Dr. Blacks because obviously I needed to talk to a professional about my psychotic thoughts

Getting out of Alice's car, thanking her and walking into the Office, I began to freak out on the inside

Why would they let a crazy man out?

I'm clearly not stable. I wake up every morning crying and shaking.

"Edward?" Dr. Black said walking out of his office

"Dr. Black" I said, getting up, "We need to talk"

He gave me a nod and motioned towards his office

I looked around his office, it looked the same, smelled the same, I sat down in the same chair I sat in in our first meeting and looked at him trying to decide where to start.

"How have things been?" he asked smiling at me, a hint of sadness flashed across his face

"Good and eh… bad" I said looking down. "The dreams have been getting really bad" I said sadly

He nodded, "Anything new in your dreams?"

I looked at him confused, "Is there something I don't remember?"

He sighed and took off his glasses, rubbing his face with his hands, "Edward…" he started

"So there has been something that you've kept from me" I said shocked, "Spit it out" I said, pissed off

"Edward it's something you're not going to want to here and I really wanted you to remember on your own but now I feel as if I should tell you…" he paused looking me in the eyes, "He didn't just penetrate you once Edward, the Doctors came up with theories of what might have happened and the most plausible explanation is that he penetrated you twice before you passed out and then wail you were asleep he penetrated you once more" he said in a completely professional voice

I heard him let out a deep breath before everything went black