Chapter Five

Normal POV
Dean sped down the road, back the way they had come from town. He was nearly 2 miles from Bobby's driveway when he saw Sam stumble and fall down into the dirt on the side of the road. He skidded to a stop on the side of the road and threw the door open. He got out and kneeled down next to his brother. He rolled him over and pulled his head into lap and out of the dirt.
Sam was pale and cold and shaking uncontrollably even though it was the middle of summer and hot as it could get.
Dean lifted Sam up off the ground and put him into backseat of the Impala before climbing in the front and turning around and heading back to Bobby's. The whole drive back Dean couldn't stop thinking about how similar it was to the night before.
Dean pulled into the driveway and hit the breaks, sending dust flying everywhere. He pulled the keys out of the ignition and then got Sam out from the backseat. He closed the door with his hip and climbed the porch steps, where Bobby was waiting with the door.
"He's not..." Bobby started, following Dean into the library.
"He's alive. I think he just passed out from the heat." Dean has sat Sam on the couch and was currently removing his boots and jacket.
"I'll get some wet cloths and some water." Bobby walked into the kitchen and came back a few minutes later with a bucket full of ice cold water and several face cloths.
"Thanks Bobby." Dean went to work soaking the cloths and wrapping them around Sam's arms - avoiding the bandage on the left one - and put one across his forehead. "He should wake up soon and then we need to get him to eat something. Did you get dad on the phone?"
"Just went to voice mail. Maybe he's on a hunt?"
"Yeah maybe, but he didn't have a car."
"He's had one stashed somewhere for the last couple of years. Don't know where he kept it though."
"I'm gonna try calling him again." Dean said, walking into the hallway and pulling out his phone.
He dialed is father's number and it went straight to voice mail, just like it had every other time he'd tried to call.
Dean walked silently back into the library and sat on the floor near Sams head.
"Dad's not coming is he?" Sam asked weakly.
"He will soon, don you think you can keep some food down?" Bobby asked.
"Maybe."
Bobby went into kitchen and started clanging around making lunch.
Sam relaxed into the lumpy couch and closed his eyes.
"Don't go back to sleep yet Sammy, you need to eat something. Bobby's making you something." Dean said.
"But 'm tired." Sam said, already half asleep.
"Okay, go back to sleep and you can have it when you wake up."
Dean patted Sam on the shoulder and then went and joined Bobby in the kitchen.
"Sam's gone back to sleep. Even though him and dad fight all the time...I can tell he wants dad to be here."
"Your father's just..."
Bobby's reply was cut off by Sam screaming in the other room. He and Dean turned around the see John dragging Sam down the hallway with an arm around his neck.
"Dad, what the hell are you doing!" Dean yelled and John stopped right in front of the door.
"I'm taking him away. He will not destroy this family with his stupidity." John's arm tightened around Sam's neck for a second and then relaxed.
"Dad, let him go! I didn't call you so you could come here and kidnap Sam!"
"Dad...please!" Sam said.
"This has nothing to do with you." John said and punched Sam in the stomach. "Keep him, I don't want a son that's going to do something so pathetic!"
John shoved Sam to the floor and stormed out the door. The sound of his truck reversing back onto the main road filled the air and then there was silence.
"Sam? You okay?" Dean asked, kneeling down next to his little brother.
"Yeah, yeah I'm fine. Is there still food left? " Sam asked as he stood up.
Dean laughed. "Yeah you're fine. There's chicken soup in the kitchen."
After lunch they went back into the library and Sam sat back down on the couch, he looked exhausted again.
"Why don't you go up to bed and sleep properly? You look like you need it." Dean said, sitting next to him.
"I'm fine Dean, just hand me that book would ya?" Sam said and pointed to a thick book that was sitting on the floor.
Dean picked it up and handed it to Sam without looking at it.
They all sat in relative silence until it got late and Bobby went up to bed.
"You coming up to bed Sam, or you gonna sleep down here?" Dean said, hand on the door jam.
"I'm coming, it'll be nice to sleep in a good bed again." Sam closed the book and thumped up the stairs as Dean turned out the light and followed him.
When Dean got up the room he and Sam were sharing, Sam was already asleep on top of the covers and still fully dressed.
Dean laughed and shook his head as he changed and turned off the light. He hought he heard Sam speak to him but he was too tired to pay attention as he climbed into bed and drifted off to sleep.

(Line Break)

Sam woke up and the room was dark. The only sound was Dean snoring in the bed next to him.

You're alone with me now Sammy.

"Leave me alone and let me sleep damn it!" Sam growled softly so he wouldn't wake Dean.

Now now, don't be like that. You know I'm not going anywhere. You know you deserve this, why won't you admit it to yourself? You know everything is your fault. I can feel it...buried inside you. What will it take to make you realize?

"Dean says it's not my fault. I believe him above you. Dean wouldn't lie to me."

And you think I would? Don't be silly Sam. Why do we always have to have the same conversation everyday?

"Well then get lost. Don't like me ignoring you, go away!"

Not getting rid of me that easily Sam. How many times do I have to say it? Someone needs to make sure you stay on track. Someone needs to make sure you know what you've done. I've said before Sam, it's all your fault. ALL OF IT! If you want it to stop so badly, if you want to be normal, you know what you have to do. And don't screw it up this time.

"I'm not listening to you anymore. You've ruined my life enough! Leave me alone!" Sam said, nearly shouting.
"Sam? You okay over there?" Dean asked quietly.
"I'm fine Dean, just go back to sleep."
Dean grunted and then rolled over onto his other side and started snoring again instantly.

See even Dean doesn't care what's wrong with you. He knows...he just doesn't want to know. He wants to pretend it's not happening. One day he's going to leave you, just like your daddy did. And you'll be all alone. You may as well just get it over with Sam.

"No. I won't let you win. Not again. You'll never make me leave. He's my brother, my flesh and blood. I may have screwed up but Dean still cares."

NO HE DOESN'T! Get with the program, he doesn't care, he doesn't want to know you. He thinks your crazy. Hearing voices Sam? They'll send you straight to an asylum. And they'll never let you out. Is that what you want? To be locked up for the rest of your life?

"Shut up, please. Let me sleep."
Sam was exhausted even after being unconscious for nearly 24 hours it felt like he hadn't slept in days, and the voice wasn't helping matters.

No! Learn to live with me or end it. Your choice Sam.

Sam groaned and rolled onto his stomach, pulling his pillow over his head.

This again? How many times have we been through this one? That will never work. I'm not a noise on the outside world, I'm in your head.
The voice laughed again and Sam swore before throwing his pillow across the room where it hit the wall.
The voice continued to laugh and taunt him all night and Sam tried to ignore as he had done for those first few years, but it was getting harder as the night wore on.
Sam got up and did his usual morning routine as the sun was rising and he was downstairs eating breakfast when Bobby walked in.
"You're up early." he said.
"Couldn't sleep." Sam replied, not looking up from his cereal.
"Well maybe you can help me then. There's a pile of books on my desk that I need to go through for a friend. He's hunting something and needs help figuring out what it is exactly."
"Okay, yeah I think can do that."
Sam put his bowl in the sink and then turned back to Bobby.
"What exactly is it I'm looking for?" he asked.
"There's a list on top of the books. Might take a while."
"That's fine. I'll give me something useful to do."

You be useful? You're kidding yourself there Sam. You couldn't be useful if you tried!
The voice shouted at him and Sam flinched as he walked into the library. He studied the list for a few minutes and then picked up the first book and started reading.
He was nearly through the second one and still hadn't found anything when Dean walked out nearly 2 hours later. He stopped and stared at Sam before walking into the kitchen.
Sam could hear Bobby and Dean talking quietly in the kitchen and tried to ignore the voice in his head telling him they were talking about him.

You're right Sam, they are talking about you. They're trying to decide what to do with you. They think you're insane.

"No they don't. Bobby's telling Dean about the case he's friend's on. He's telling Dean why I'm in here reading all these books and writing stuff down. They aren't talking about me. They wouldn't do that." Sam whispered.

I wouldn't be so sure about that. I can hear what they're saying. Oh look here they come, to tell you they're shipping you off. Don't say I didn't warn you Sammy.

Dean and Bobby walked into the room and Bobby sat at his desk while Dean picked up a book and sat next to Sam before. Every time Sam flipped a page in the book or shifted around in his seat Dean would look over at him.
After nearly two hours of this Sam had had enough.
"I'm going outside." Sam said, picking up another book and heading towards the front door.
"Why? It's hot out there." Dean asked.
"Stop looking at me like you're waiting for me to snap or explode. I can't handle it. How many times do I have to tell you I'm fine!" Sam snapped and stormed outside.

Finally! You know you are insane though. Worse than some people.

"Shut up! I'm not crazy!" Sam yelled.

You're talking to a voice inside you're own head Sam. That sounds plenty crazy to me.
Sam climbed into the bed of an old rusted pickup and ignored the voice as he started taunting him again.

A/N: So this chapter kinda sucked, but I just wanted to post something tonight. I know there's a lot of dialogue, but that's just how I write, I am working on that though. I am going away in a few days and won't have any internet for a week, so I won't be able to post anything, but I should have another chapter up in the next day to satisfy those that are reading this story.
Thank you to everyone who is reading this and has reviewed.