This was meant to be a one shot but... ah what the hell!
"Aww come on!" Muttered Joker as Cortez's Chryssalid eagerly ate one of Joker's soldiers and implanted an egg into the unfortunate bugger. Steve just laughed at his misfortune.
"Not my fault you're a terrible tactician. Well, looks like Vega will become a Zombie soon then a mommy." Cortez surveyed the battle field. Joker's team was truly in disarray. Vega, the heavy weapons guy, had just been eaten. The Sniper, Garrus, had been on the receiving end of a Elite Muton. Wrex had been introduced to the Chryssalid a mere five turns ago, shortly after a Psi-trooped named Liara had been incinerated. Joker had two psi-soliders left. Shepard and Kaidan.
"I am so telling Shepard that you killed her with glee."
"No, she'll hit you for getting her and her lover killed." Retorted Cortez as he moved the Sectoid Commander into a flanking position, ready to assault Kaidan's rear flank. He then moved the Elite Muton up, closer to Shepard. Steve just had to laugh at how Joker had customised Vega, Kaidan and Shepard to look like their namesakes. "Your turn."
There was a growl from Joker as he analyzed the pile of shit he was in. Shepard and Kaidan were pinned down. He glanced at the timer in the corner of the screen slowly ticking down. Quickly he made his attacks and let out a whoop of delight as the Muton went down.
"Hook, line and sinker." Came the last three damning words from Cortez as the Sectoid Commander was moved out of the fog of war and into Joker's view. The Sectoid glowed as it used a Psi move.
"Oh shit shit shit!" Chanted Joker as the Commander was taken over, turned around and shot Kaidan dead. "What the shit? No. NOO! You indoctrinated Shepard! You bastard!" Cortez couldn't help but laugh with glee at Joker's panicked voice as he ordered the Chryssalid to say hello to Commander Shepard.
"Damn you Steve! You have doomed the galaxy, doomed it! The Reapers will slaughter us now!" Trust Joker to be a drama queen. When Joker had calmed down and Steve had stopped sniggering, he asked something.
"Up for round two Mr. Moreau?"
"Only if I get to play as the aliens." Replied Joker sulkily. Cortez happily agreed, it was all the more satisfying when he decimated Joker's Alien team without losing any of his troops. Soon there was only TIM, the Thin man, left who was pretty much over killed by Commander Shepard with her Psi abilities.
"Round three?" Suggested Cortez, there was no reply from Joker as he's cut off the comm, so he could sulk in privacy of his cockpit no doubt.
For those who don't know, Cortez and Joker are playing X-Com Enemy Unknown.