Skipper stumbled forward a few steps, clutching his head with one hand.

"Skipper…?" Kowalski questioned with a concerned expression, "Are you feeling alright?"

"Yeah, completely," However, the leader was leaning heavily against the sofa, "Right as rain." Meanwhile, Blowhole's eyes looked like they were about to pop out of his head.

"No… That's impossible…" He stuttered, "You're an android, you can't be…" Suddenly Skipper's knees buckled and he was only saved from hitting the ground by Private, who caught him at the last minute.

"Skipper, you are exhibiting a more extreme version of the effects of the poison you encountered in your misunderstanding with Private," the scientist stated.

"My misunderstanding with Private…?" Skipper repeated his eyes out of focus. However, Kowalski had already rushed off into the lab, returning a few seconds later with a beaker of a clear liquid.

"Lie down," Kowalski ordered.

"Yes, mom." Skipper replied drowsily and obediently followed instructions, lying down on the couch.

"Now, drink this," Kowalski handed Skipper the beaker.

"What's that?"

"The antidote." Only a few seconds after he'd drunk the mixture, Skipper drifted off into unconsciousness.

March 25th

Skipper sat in his room staring at the wall. They were simple quarters. A room with a bed, a desk, and a wardrobe. On the walls were adorned with a few posters, photographs and certificates that, though he never remembered putting any of them up, seemed like something his younger self would do.

"Skippar…" Immediately Skipper was alert. That semi taunting voice was unmistakeable. Immediately he opened the door, just in time to see someone duck around the corner. Someone about Hans' height and build. Despite the fact he knew Hans was very much on his side, his gut just didn't seem satisfied. His gut had never felt satisfied around the Puffin. He remembered that fish fight too clearly, probably because it was one of the most awkward experiences in his life.

"Hans?" He called cautiously. Suddenly he dived for cover as a bullet narrowly missed his head.

"Did you think I would stop and fish fight? Hm?" This was followed by another pattering of feet as Hans continued to race off into the distance. Immediately Skipper followed, reaching for his own weapon only to find it was not there. That was right: Marlow had told him he couldn't carry a weapon without supervision unless he was an agent.

"Hans! Where's Manfridi and Johnson?" There was no answer. He was now in an unfamiliar part of the base, which looked suspiciously like Blowhole's lair. He looked around, "Hans?"

"Come now, Skippar. I'm only over here." Skipper immediately shot after the voice, entering a nearby room. However, as soon as he saw the interior and its occupants he hid behind one of the gigantic computers, entirely forgetting Hans.

"Sir, doctor Blowhole demands another audience," Skipper heard a voice state. It sounded just like his! He carefully poked his head around the corner. It looked just like him! Well, it had to be Kuchikukhan's android. However, a greater shock was yet to come.

"Of course he does!" Marlow snapped in a fake Russian accent, "cut off one of Doris' fingers or something. That should get Mr I'm-all-sciency-genius back in line." Well, this certainly wasn't the Marlow he knew unless it was some kind of joke.

"But if it's about the control? He's been projecting the Puffin again and we gave him absolutely no clearance to do so."

"Then you should have better controls!" the Marlow snapped, "Check on the protégé. Make sure the signal never reached him. The Red Squirrel did not plan for so long only to be messed up by Dr Mammal-fish."

The Red Squirrel. Well, this was now the second time this week he discovered his whole life was a lie. Still, he had no time to debate just what was true and false, he had to get back to his quarters before the Android found out he was missing. He checked that the Squirrel's attention was focused squarely on his acorn cookie and attempted to duck out into the hallway.

"You ninnycompoopy!" Marlow shouted at his digital double, "You made me drop my cookie!" Skipper looked around just in time to see the Red Squirrel, who had turned around to retrieve his cookie, look back at him. Without a seconds hesitation the man yelled: "Get the protégé!"

"You discovered a drinkable antidote?" Blowhole remarked dryly.

"No, I haven't had time the last few days," Kowalski remarked as he checked Skipper's pulse, under too much stress to bother to take false credit, "I just needed to knock him out. We don't have time to chase him all over New York to get him to take a shot." This said, Kowalski rushed off in the direction of the lab to prepare an antidote, the other members of the team following to see if they could be of assistance, leaving Blowhole in the room with Marlene and an unconscious skipper.

"You seem amazingly calm." Blowhole commented, noting the lack of hysteria on Marlene's part, "how many times has he been poisoned this week?"

"There's nothing I can do," Marlene answered, "you only get in the way if you make a fuss, so there's no sense running around like a headless chicken."

"Admirable mind-set." Blowhole stated in reply. The room once more lapsed into almost perfect silence, ignoring the sound of the streets outside, and the clinking that resulted from Blowhole's experiments with the inescapable handcuffs, which were more out of boredom and the possibility of copying Kowalski's design than hope of escape.

"If Skipper's not the android, where do you think it is?" Marlene asked.

"Why do you ask?"

"I might be able to help."

"Well, the answer would be that I have absolutely no idea." At this, Marlene looked slightly surprised.

"You're seriously admitting that?"

"I might be saying that to convince you that I don't know in order to disguise the fact that I do know."

"Or you could be saying that to disguise the fact that you actually don't know."

"Or I could be saying that knowing that you would assume that, thus…" Blowhole paused, noticing that Marlene had gotten up and was walking towards the table on which Kowalski had placed the keys to the handcuffs, quite deliberately within sight of Blowhole, "What are you doing?"

"Letting you go," Marlene stated, approaching the scientist, "I've got nothing against you, and from what I hear your sister's a nice girl, if misguided by certain persons." Marlene was now stood directly in front of the scientist, the keys in hand.

"Well, to I get to leave, sometime this year?"

"There's a catch."

"I'm not turning myself in."

"I'll let you go, if you allow Doris to date Kowalski."

"Now wait a minute…"

"Or you can go to Hoboken, and the android will kill your sister, followed by you."

Blowhole weighed the odds in his mind. It was unlikely Barry was going to come back for him, so he didn't exactly have much of a choice.

"Marlene, did you ever consider going into politics?" Blowhole sighed, "Alright, you have a deal."

"Pleasure doing business with you. I'll let Kowalski know you've escaped."

"Where'd Blowhole go?" Kowalski asked, carrying a syringe that would have scared the living daylights out of Skipper into the room, though his attention was focused more on his patient.

"He went to find his sister." Marlene answered, standing as close behind the scientist as she could without crowding him. She watched as Kowalski removed the air bubbles, then sanitized the area of skin. The needle had just entered the skin, when Kowalski screamed:

"Private, hit the emergency protocol now!"

"What?" Private queried.

"DO IT!"

Errors detected:

All movement functions: offline

Wireless: offline

Warning: attempt to achieve data detected

"I swear this is a violation of my civil rights, paralysing me." The android protested, opening his eyes, scanning the room around him.

"You're an android." Kowalski answered coldly.

"I don't see how that makes any difference."

"Where's Skipper?" Marlene demanded.

"I have absolutely no idea."

"I warn you, android, we will search your memory contents…" Kowalski threatened.

"You did try, and failed." At this, the android had a point. Kowalski looked from one member of the room to the next. He'd really run out of ideas. This kind of thing was more Skipper's specialty.

"There's… There's antimony, arsenic, aluminium, selenium,
and hydrogen and oxygen and…" Kowalski's phone sang. The number that appeared on the screen was not one he was expecting.

Kowalski's ringtone is part of the first verse of the Elements Song by Tom Lehrer