Penultimate chapter! Ok, this story got way more confusing than I originally intended it to. If you're a bit confused, go ahead and ask. Just to answer a question, Skipper is not Hans, Hans was Hans, and Geert is very much Geert, Skipper was just making that up, since there's no way the Red Squirrel would know if he was lying.
"Alright Kowalski, give me some options," the two Skippers requested in unison.
"Sorry, sir." The android apologised, noting Skipper's raised eyebrow. The real leader hadn't been replaced that fast had he?
"Well, I think we can exit the way we came in, that will take us approximately ten minutes." Kowalski replied.
"15.77732 compensating for the limp." The android added.
"However, we placed some charges in key structural locations that should destroy enough of the Blue Hen's…"
"It's the Red Squirrel, for the last time!"
"Android, I will not go through this again, the Red Squirrel…"
"Is exactly who we are up against," Skipper finished, "I got the gist of it. Let's get moving. You know the way back?"
"Can I build a working particle collider from the parts of an antiquated shrink-ray, which of course, I..." Kowalski affirmed as he turned around, only to find that his last statement had been made in haste. Before him there were at least six paths to take, each branching into multiple paths further along as did the paths the Skippers had emerged from, "… Oh, Ohm's Law."
"Warning, escape detected!" a voice announced over the loud speaker.
"Well, that's just dandy. Kowalski, give me that detonator." Skipper ordered. Kowalski automatically looked to Rico, who shrugged his shoulders.
"I think he dropped it when we went after you." Marlene answered, to which Rico unfortunately nodded.
"Alright, we pick a random passage and hope it gets us out of here."
The two skipper's had kept equal pace as the team rushed through the tunnels, remaining almost completely silent.
"How's the arm holding up?" The android asked, breaking the silence.
"Fine. You did a good job." Skipper replied. As good a job as he would have done patching up a dislocated shoulder.
"I'm sorry about… If I kind of freaked you…"
"Maybe young Private, but I'm not…"
"No, I get it. When the first motion and optical systems prototype of me malfunctioned and I saw myself with glowing red eyes walking out of the darkness, it wasn't exactly expected. I can't really help doing that when I go infra-red though."
"Hm." Skipper acknowledged, and there was a pause in the conversation, "How'd the team get along without me?"
"Not well." The android replied.
"They seemed to be getting on pretty well, taking orders from you and all that." There was a hint of jealously in Skipper's voice that he wasn't proud of. He'd never gotten big headed about it, but he'd always thought the men in his team, including himself, were one of a kind. Well, apparently all it took was a glorified calculator to replace him.
"Only for the last twenty four hours. Amazingly Kowalski took control."
"Well, I always expected it would be Marlene, not that I approve of a woman on the team. Messes with the morale." Skipper was still trying to work out just what was set up by the Squirrel, and what was fiction, he'd seen Manfredi and Johnson with his own eyes, yet they were just some weird mind control device.
"Hopefully now you're back things should go back to normal. Everyone gets what happened, they understand what you were going through."
"Yeah, well I'll try to be just as understanding," Skipper replied taking the hint. If she loved Kowalski, well, he was glad she was happy.
"That was just a coincidence," The android answered, calculating from drop in pace, saddened glances towards Marlene followed by extended periods staring at the ground.
"You would know," Skipper answered with a weak smile. He still found it creepy that he'd been a bug in a jar for who knows how long, "Still…"
"Stop right there!" the Squirrel's voice echoed through the intercom, "I know you can hear me."
"What do you want?" Skipper shouted. This was followed by the Squirrel's impressive impression of an evil laugh.
"Turn yourself over to me, and I will release your friends."
"In some parallel universe." Kowalski snapped.
"Think about it Kowalski. It will take you six minutes to make it out of the building. If I am making this announcement, I must be in the main security room. Now, the main security room is two minutes from the room in which you placed the detonator for your explosives, yes, skipper, I know all about those, thirty seconds to reprogram it, and one minute and a half to get clear. That is a total of four minutes. There is no possible way for you to clear the blast range in time. I however, will be safely out of range."
"Don't do it Skippah!" Private suddenly shouted, recognising the look on skipper's face, "as soon as you give yourself up he'll just blow the place anyway."
"Good observation, young one," the Squirrel cackled, "It will take Skipper approximately four minutes to reach me. Now, if I want him alive, at this point in time at least, I won't throw the switch…"
"But we're still within the blast range once he gets there." The android pointed out.
"But it takes me two minutes to get to the detonator and one and a half minutes to get clear. Do you understand my reasoning?" the Squirrel received no reply, "I'll take that as a yes, then. Your route is simple, retrace your steps back to the junction cavern where you re-joined your team, and take the third right." The announcement cut off.
"I've got no choice," the two Skippers stated in unison, both in the same grim tone. The turned each glaring at each other. Then both turned from the other, their eyes both darting about the room. Slowly, and not at all suspiciously, they sauntered away from each other, their eyes giving no indication of their targets. Then Skipper bent as if to tie his shoelace.
"Don't try to play the hero, Skipper." The flesh and blood skipper argued to distract from the metal pipe he was picking up from the floor. The android might have a higher IQ and access to the internet, but he was no match when it came to good old-fashioned ingenuity, skipper reasoned. He'd knock the robot out before he even knew what hit him.
"I could say the same to you." The android countered, carefully lifting the wooden board propped up against the wall. For once the android was glad of his genius level intellect, even if it did clash with his otherwise comparably ignorant wiring. Skipper would never know what hit him.
The two Skippers once again sauntered towards each other, arms as if clasped behind their back, but each really gripping their chosen weapon. Kowalski looked on with curiosity, wondering just which one would hit the other first. Suddenly there was a hollow thump and the clang of metal on metal.
"Fascinating," Kowalski muttered, "they hit at exactly the same time."
"Skippah…!" Private rushed forward towards the unconscious man.
"Sorry, Private," spoke the android in answer to the boy's silent question, "he's going to be out for a while and have a nasty bump on the head, but he won't have a concussion or any kind of serious injury," the android placed the pipe on the floor, removed his jacket and placed it under Skipper's head. He turned to Kowalski, "I realise now, I'm not Skipper. I'm… I'm not sure what I am," the android looked down to his feet, though almost immediately the strength returned to his gaze, "but I do know this, the team needs a Skipper and Private a father," Skipper removed the gun he had taken from Kowalski out of his pocket, handing it to Rico.
"What are you…"
"I know the Squirrel, Kowalski," Skipper stated, "he only wants the real me alive so he can shoot him himself. You need it more than me," it was clear from the look in his optical sensors, and from the eyes of everyone else that the android's statement was painfully true. There was no way he was coming back. Suddenly the android stood up strait, surveying his men like the officer who's memories he was encoded with, "Now, it will only take a few seconds after…" he didn't finish for Private's sake, "for the Squirrel to realise he's been duped. That should still give you time to get clear, even accounting for carrying Skipper. Understand?"
"Yes, sir!" the team answered in unison, along with the click of heels as they stood to attention. Skipper smiled, "It's been an honour to serve with you, gentlemen," he saluted. Then he turned to the unconscious Skipper, "and it's been an honour to finally meet you, sir, if only briefly."
"Skippah…?" Private asked cautiously, "Why did you, you know, not hurt other Skippah?"
"That's classified between me and your boss young Private."
"Oh, dis is so sad!" MORT bawled in Kowalski's hand, "I do not want Andriody to go away!" The little device shook itself from Kowalski's grip and wheeled towards the android, landing on his boot, "If… If de chipmunk blows de place kaboomy, do you think one of your titanium stabilizers will be left so I can remember you?"
"Uh…" The android picked up the device, "I'm not sure how I'm supposed to answer that, so, it's a 93.997% probability." He handed it back to Kowalski, before moving to leave. He wasn't one for mushy goodbyes. They only made it harder, at least, that's what the real Skipper had told Manfridi and Johnson back in Denmark.
"It detonated early?" Marlene questioned in a monotone. She didn't need Kowalski to tell her it was physically impossible for the Squirrel to get clear in time, meaning only one thing. Kowalski had worked this out, though felt no need to voice this as he watched the building burn. He could almost hear the echo of the gunshot, though his thoughts were taken up more with the fact that the android had taken Doris' location with him. Skipper on the other hand, could see the triumphant smirk, and the cry of fury as the Red Squirrel realised that the android had handcuffed him to the bomb as it counted down unstoppably. Private could see the trail of oil and coolant that leaked from the wound in the android's central processor as he dragged himself forward. And Rico saw the first kaboom that he hated.
"Well, well, well, looks like I will get that rematch," a familiar voice announced, the sentence punctuated by his fist hitting his hand. Behind him were two dozen Rats. Kowalski didn't have the energy to scream one of his science related exclamations.
"Well it looks like we're out of the frying pan and into the fire." Private whispered. However just as the team were resigning themselves to their fate, the gigantic crane above their heads began to move, the rusted metal dome it carried slowly aligning itself over the heads of the aggressors, until it was directly above them, when it dropped.
"You all alright down there?" Nigel shouted poking his head out of the door of the crane. Receiving no negative response, he climbed down the ladder, and ran over to the team.
"Uncle Nigel?" Private asked.
"Indeed, old boy," he replied, "Feels good to be back in the game," However, seeing the expressions on the team's faces, his mood changed, "Where's Blue?"
"Blue?" Kowalski asked, finally acknowledging the newcomer.
"Yes, I tracked her here."
"Then it was all a trap," skipper stated angrily, "Again!" The Squirrel had anticipated his every move since the start. He just couldn't accept that his escape, the android's sacrifice, everything, was all another part of some sick game, "She'd never be sloppy enough to let you get a decent lead on her unless she wanted you to."
"I wasn't tracking her, per se; I was actually following the trail of a young lady she seemed to be taking with her."
"Wait, can you give me a description?" Kowalski asked eagerly.
"About yay tall," Nigel motioned, "Blond hair, blue eyes…"
"HELP! KOWALSKI!" a woman's voice screamed, interrupting Nigel's description.
"Doris!?" Kowalski immediately set off running towards the source of the sound, though obscured by the crane. The team followed a few paces behind.
"Wait," Nigel called after them, "it's probably a…!" However the team was already out of sight, "Oh bugger." He sighed, running after them. Rockgut was right; he was too old for this.
"Doris?" Kowalski panicked, searching the area, his worries leaving him oblivious to the fact that the area into which they'd run was ideal for an ambush.
"Kowalski?!" a faint voice called from behind a rusting forklift. Suddenly Skipper heard the twang of a bowstring releasing. There was a thump as the arrow hit flesh. Skipper turned around.
"Private?!"
"Ge' 'own, 'ipper!" Rico ordered, pushing Skipper down, at the same time grabbing the first weapon he could find in his backpack, namely a spear gun, and aiming it at the area the arrow had come from. Suddenly there was a blur of movement as the attacker attempted to move to an angle at which he could hit Skipper.
"Doris, move!" the blur shouted, and was about to draw the string to fire again, when Rico shot first, pinning the attacker to the wall behind him, the spear sticking out of his leg.
"Don't you ever give up, Geert?" Skipper asked, inspecting Private's arm from which a barbed arrow protruded, the same arrow that would otherwise be in his heart.
"I will never give up," Geert spat, his face white with pain, "never."
"Ow!" Doris exclaimed as she twisted her angle in a poor attempt at flight. Immediately Kowalski's attention as diverted to her.
"You betrayed me Doris? Again?" Kowalski asked, his heartbreak apparent. Doris merely looked up guiltily.
Geert followed the men in dark suits and sunglasses towards the nondescript car without protest, though shot a glare of pure hatred at Skipper as he passed. Doris however, didn't accept the fact that any struggles at this point would be completely futile.
"Kowalski?" she called out when she was only a few feet from the car, a look of true fear on her face, "you aren't really going to let them take me, are you?!" Kowalski didn't acknowledge her, "Kowalski?!"
"You betrayed me, Doris." He replied, after a few moments.
"Geert had rescued me from Blue, Kowalski. I owed it to him," She pleaded, though quickly saw that it had no effect, "Come on Kowalski, this is no different than before, I promise I won't do anything like this again," Kowalski still made no move to release her, "Don't you love me?"
"Doris," Kowalski allowed the word to hang in the air, as he glanced at Private who was receiving treatment for his arm, "This time you've gone too far. I'm not sorry. I only wish I had done this earlier."
"Kowalski?" Doris called as she got into the car. Kowalski was still unmoved. The door shut, and the car began to drive away, probably to Hoboken.
"About time you got over her." Skipper stated, "193 betrayals is just a security liability." However, it was as the car rounded the bend and disappeared from sight, that Kowalski began to regret his decision.