Chapter 12: Love me like you hate me

It's valentines day today...and everybody is making plans to go out with there love. Well tonight, Meyson is my Valentine. She's 9 months old now. She's walking while leaning on furniture, she's eating finger foods, and she's babbling and she's using her hands for so many things. She looks more and more like Toby every day. She has my curls, but her hair is blonde, with bright blue eyes.

I still haven't heard from him...I left notes out there and they've just sat there.

"Hey mom" I said when I walked into the kitchen.

"hey honey" she said. She was mixing some food for Meyson who was in her high chair.

"What are you and dad doing tonight?"

"We're going to the cabin for the weekend, we've both been really busy so we just want to get away. I'm leaving you the card"

"Have fun"

"Are you going to be ok this weekend?"

"Yea i'll be fine. Meyson and I are going to go out for a valentines day dinner"

"She's your valentine?"

"Yep, the best yet"

It was the first valentines day without Toby...but I was determinded to be ok all day and night.

After my mom and dad left I got Meyson ready and I got myself ready and we drove to the thai restaurant.

When I sat down I got her out of her carseat and had her on my lap.

I looked around and saw all the couples eating and being happy together.

I've thought about moving on from Toby...but I can't. It's hard to look at Meyson every single day and see him in her...and I can't move on from him.

I ate my food and talked to Meyson a little bit and then went home. She was getting tired and fussy.

When I got home though I found a rose on the counter.

"I'm sorry for not being there with you. You looked amazing. I love you. I can't wait until One Day" I read it outloud.

"Ugh! what the hell is One Day!" I cried out.

It was a fake rose, so it wouldn't die, and it had a perfume scent to make it smell good.

But it showed he was still out there...he was still around. He still loved me. I quickly got a pen and paper.

"Happy Valentines day. Where have you been?" I wrote.

I stuck it outside and walked upstairs to change Meyson and I into more comfortable clothes.

When I came back down I saw a note on the counter again.

"Had to leave for awhile. Now i'm back but I still can't show around. Not yet." the letter said.

"Ugh!" I was frustrated!

He doesn't say anything to me for months! And now this! He still can't show around! What the hell man!

I was banging things around and being mad.

"Um...knock knock?" I heard a voice. But not the voice I wanted to hear.

"Oh...hey Wren" I said.

"Is something wrong?" he said in his english accent.

"What...oh no...nothing's wrong. What are you doing here?" I asked.

"I was wondering if you would like some company for Valentines day" he said. Wren has had feelings for me, and he won't get rid of them. Even when I was with Toby.

"Wren...my family and I have a really good relationship now, and I think you coming back into the picture in any way like that, would just mess things up" I lied.

"What about as friends?"

"I don't want them to get the wrong idea"

"Are they home?"

"No"

"Well then, I guess we're safe" he said. I didn't want Toby to think I was with him...

"Please Wren...I would like to just go to bed. Plus Meyson is upstairs asleep" I said.

"I can go to bed with you" he said sloppily. Was he drunk? I just got a strong wiff of hennessy.

"Wren please...look you can't drive so how about you just go to the barn. I don't like alcohol around Meyson" I tried to keep my distance.

"Please Spence...i...i love you. I'm in love with you."

"Your drunk. Now please go" I said sternly.

Then he threw himself onto me and made me back into the counter.

"Wren get the hell off" I said trying to push him. Ugh why can't Toby help me!

He didn't get off so I stomped on his foot.

"Your not getting rid of me Spencer" he said in an angry voice.

"Wren please get off of me!" I said. I didn't know what he wanted to do, but I didn't like it.

I kept trying to fight him off and then someone ran into the house and pulled him off of me and punched him.

"I'm leaving i'm leaving" Wren said surrendering. The person had to be Toby...i could tell by the he stood. He was wearing a dark hoodie and I couldn't see his face.

"Toby Wait..." I said. He stopped but didn't look at me. I know he won't turn around even if I asked him too...it's not 'One Day' yet.

"Thanks...and...i love you" I said. I could see a small piece of his cheek and I swore I saw a smile. I had to try..

"Please...will you show your face...can you make tonight right here right now...One day?" I said. I saw him clench his fist together.

"Please!" I said again.

"You can see Meyson...i'll go get her...please Toby...I need you" I was crying now. I wanted to be in his arms and be with him. But he slowly walked to the door and locked it.

"I love you too" he wispered so lightly that if I wasn't intensly watching him I wouldn't have heard.

"Toby!" yelled out after he walked out. I quickly unlocked the door and ran out there.

"Toby! Please!" I cried out again. I didn't see him anywhere. It was raining really hard though so of course I can't see him. I felt the tears though...running down my cheeks.

I went back inside and locked the door again.

He saved my life just now...he was right there! Right there! There is no doubt that was him! Why can't he come back now!